Choices Of The Heart

By Alix

Disclaimers: This is the sequel to Mended Hearts. You will need to read this story first to understand the motivations of the characters in Choices of the Heart. These are Uber characters, and they are my own. Hands off, please. This story contains a beautiful, loving relationship between the two main characters, who are both female. It will be rated R for language and sexual situations. Also, if you don’t care for hurt/comfort, hit the back button NOW! This applies to angst as well.

My story is dedicated to all my special friends out there in cyberspace, one in particular. You know who you are! I love you guys! I’d also like to thank my buddy AJ for taking time out of her busy life to beta read for me!

Feedback and constructive criticism is always welcome. You may reach me at alix_s64@hotmail.com Now, on to Alex and Bryn’s latest adventures!

Crystal blue eyes gazed into an identically hued pair. A tall, dark, and incredibly beautiful surgeon listened carefully to the strong heartbeat of a chubby five-month-old boy. He gurgled happily as a plump fist hovered near its intended target — Dr. Alexandra Morgan’s lustrous, black hair.

"Riley James Smith!" his mother admonished, laughing. "Don’t pull Dr. Alex’s hair!"

The warning came too late. The boy was now chewing happily on a fistful of the good doctor’s inky tresses. Although feeling actual pain, Dr. Morgan persevered with her examination.

"Ma, ma, ma, ma," the baby cooed, looking at the doctor adoringly.

Alexandra Devin Morgan, M.D., and chief of pediatric heart surgery, simply melted. After she completed her patient’s examination, Alex tickled Riley’s tummy. Settling the giggling baby on her hip, she turned to his beaming parents.

"Riley looks great! Everything checks out perfectly normal. The echocardiogram shows his heart to be functioning just as I expected. He’s a healthy, handsome little boy." Alex took a handkerchief from her coat pocket and wiped a bit of drool from the baby’s chin.

A trim, petite blonde with sage green eyes watched from the doorway with pride. Lex looks so good with a baby in her arms! I wish I had a camera right now.

Alex handed Riley back to his parents. The baby did not go back willingly, clinging to Dr. Morgan fretfully.

Bryn suppressed a giggle at the perplexed look on her partner’s face.

"Shh, Riley. I know you like her, " his mother soothed. She turned to Alex, a hopeful look in her eyes. "Dr. Morgan, Chad and I would like for you to attend Riley’s christening this Sunday. It would mean so much to us. Will you?"

Alex smiled her endearing, lopsided smile. "Um … sure. I’d like that. Just give me the time and place, and I’ll be there."

All three Smiths clustered around Alex for a good-bye hug. An invitation was pressed into her slender hand. After saying their good-byes to Bryn, and extending an invitation to her as well, the little family left amidst a sea of triumphant smiles.

Bryn closed the door and threw her arms around her beautiful partner, squeezing tight. "Congratulations! You saved another family, my love!"

Alex returned the hug affectionately. "Just doing my job, Squeak. Just doing my job!" The surgeon closed her eyes and sighed contentedly, her heart full of happiness.

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Alexandra Morgan and Bryn O’Neill made a fabulous team. Not only professionally, but personally as well. The pediatric heart surgeon and pediatric intensive care nurse shared their home, their careers, and most of all, their hearts.

On December 31^st, 1999, the soul mates held a commitment ceremony in their home. They exchanged rings, vows, and had a small but elegant reception for a few close friends and Bryn’s family. Then they welcomed in the new Millennium. The following day, the happy couple flew to Cape Cod for a short honeymoon. A demanding work schedule meant that their real honeymoon would have to be postponed until June. Alex and Bryn looked forward to that time. A trip to Bali was being carefully planned.

After the honeymoon, the two settled happily into work, play, and simply being together. Alex was working towards a childhood dream: obtaining her pilot’s license. Bryn was putting the finishing touches on a children’s book — featuring the friendship of two little girls. One Magic Summer included Harry and Noah, as well as a happy ending. In addition, the nurse and surgeon were taking women’s boxing classes together. They also rode horses whenever possible; Alex was even teaching Bryn beginning jumps on Starlight!

Alex had recently been promoted to chief of pediatric heart surgery at Egleston. Bryn continued to shine as one of the best and most respected critical care nurses in the hospital. Having obtained her masters degree in nursing before she met the adult Dr. Morgan, Bryn had risen to the top of her profession.

The doctor and nurse attempted to keep their personal relationship as private as possible at work. Some staff members were aware that the two were a couple, but kept it to themselves. Bryn was very popular among her peers at Egleston, and although her recalcitrant partner was not quite as favored, everyone respected the dedicated surgeon.

Her sensitive stomach all but gone, Alex had gained a much-needed five pounds. The beautiful doctor glowed with health and happiness. On the rare occasions when she would be stricken with a severe migraine headache, Bryn would patiently nurse her lover through the crisis.

Although Alex was emotionally stable now, she kept regular monthly appointments with her therapist, Bonnie Kaplan. There were still many issues she needed to work through.

Bryn’s book, One Magic Summer, was helping both women cope with the devastating loss of one another as children. It was such a joy for Bryn to write about all the what ifs in their lives. She had selected the name Sydney James for Lexi, and Victoria Reilly for herself. Reilly, of course, was derived from young Riley Smith. James was from Alex’s paternal grandfather. Sydney and Victoria were Bryn’s favorite feminine names; names she wished to give to her own children if she and Alex ever got to that point. And that was a very big if.

Alex adored children, but the mere mention of parenthood would make her sullen and very angry. Instantly, her sweet countenance would turn sour. Still, Bryn believed that Alex would overcome her fears one day and make an outstanding, if overprotective parent. Bryn had hope for the future and she would remain patient. They had plenty of time. Besides, the young nurse was deliriously happy with her wonderful partner in every way.

Alex and Bryn were much more than just partners. They were the best of friends. Nothing made them happier than to simply be together. Four splendid months had gone by since Alex had spent a long weekend of sexual healing in Bryn’s arms. The days since then were filled with a joy and a love of life unequaled.

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On a dreary Friday night, rain fell heavily outside. In the background, Unchained Melody played out its spiritual lyrics. Two soul mates cuddled in a huge cherry sleigh bed next to a blazing fire.

"Gone were the pain, the fatigue, and the needles. But along with them, my best friend was gone as well." Bryn wiped tears from her sage green eyes as she read to her lover. Alex had wrapped the small blonde protectively in her warm embrace.

"Go on, Squeak. I’ve got you." Alex planted a soft kiss to the blond head.

"I didn’t understand, I was but a babe, only four years old. My heart had been completely mended, yet it still felt broken. It was the first loss in my young life, and I was devastated. Bryn suddenly put down the manuscript, overwhelmed by the painful memories, and turned to hug her lover.

"Hey, Sweetheart! We’re okay now. Everything worked out great, and we’re together."

Alex tenderly rubbed Bryn’s back in soothing circles. Besides, you’re giving our story a different ending, remember? Sydney and Victoria are reunited, and grow up together. Your writing is incredibly beautiful. It’s helping me to heal even more."

"Thanks, Lex. Anything for you, my love. It’s hard to believe that my book is going to be published. It’s another dream come true for me." Bryn inhaled deeply of the warm, spicy scent of her lover’s neck. Alex always smelled of Opium, Jasmine, and clean linens. Bryn gazed up into cornflower blue eyes full of compassion and understanding. "I love you so."

"I love you, my Bryn." Long fingers reverently brushed Bryn’s cheek. "Just like the song, I hunger for your touch." Alex ducked her head and leaned in for a soul-searing kiss. And the two tenderly made love to the sounds of the music and the rain.

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Alex held Bryn close, the surgeon absently stroking her golden hair. I’ve never felt anything like Bryn’s touch! She’s so amazing as a lover. Is it possible for anyone to be this happy? The beautiful doctor sighed, gathering up her courage. Finally, she spoke.

"Bryn, there’s, um, something I’ve been meaning to ask you," Alex whispered hoarsely.

"Sure, Honey. Go right ahead." Bryn appeared concerned and gave her partner a gentle, affectionate squeeze.

"I … you … have you?" Alex bit her lip.

"What is it, Lex?" Bryn gave her partner a quick peck on the lips.

"Have you, um …you seem … very experienced. Alex swallowed hard. "Have you been with a lot of … women?"

Bryn felt a deep pang in her heart at the look of sheer vulnerability on her lover’s face. "No, Honey. Of course I haven’t." She cupped Alex’s soft cheek in her hand. "I was with one person for a very long time," she whispered. "Plus, I happen to have a very vivid imagination." Bryn smiled slyly. "I’m a writer, remember? And … I just want so much to please you. I love you, you know?"

Alex’s heart rate increased, and her throat went dry. She smiled her special only for Bryn smile. "You do please me, Squeak. You’re incredible! But … what about you? Are you happy with me? I mean, do I satisfy you?" Alex unintentionally batted her long eyelashes as she spoke.

Oh, God! Stop that, Lex! I can’t resist those eyes! "Honey, of course you do! Beyond all my wildest dreams. Why do you ask?"

"Just checking. I’ve never been so happy in my entire life as I am now. But … I’m feeling a little … insecure." Alex furrowed her dark brows.

"I understand, Baby. Everyday I feel like I’m living out some sort of fairy tale." Bryn ran her fingers through her lover’s silky hair. "The important thing is, we’re together. As long as we are, nothing else matters. Right?"

Alex grinned. "You’re right, Squeak!" She gently tapped her favorite upturned nose, and Bryn blinked, crinkling the aforementioned nose a little. "Let’s go into the kitchen for a snack. All that loving made me hungry."

Bryn gently patted her partner’s belly. "I’ll make some hot cocoa and grilled cheese sandwiches for us and we can eat out on the porch."

"Great idea! Let’s go." Alex scooped her very naked partner up in her arms and hurried into the kitchen, laughing.

"Wait! I need my robe! Or, at least a tee shirt! Lexiiiiii!"

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Alex was awakened early Saturday morning by a persistent ringing. She had been very deeply asleep, and grumbled a little as she struggled to reach for the phone, Bryn still clinging tightly to her.

"No, Lexi! Stay right here, " she mumbled. "Cold!"

Alex held her close as she answered the phone. "Dr. Morgan here." The color quickly drained from her face. "Oh. It’s you. What do you want this time, David?"

"Who is it, Lex?’ Bryn asked hoarsely as she struggled to awaken.

"It’s a little late for apologies, don’t you think? The time when I needed you most, you pulled a Dr. Laura on me!"

A what? Dr. Laura? Understanding suddenly dawned in Bryn’s eyes as she realized it was David on the phone. She gave Lex a comforting hug.

"You know exactly what I mean! You and your sanctimonious ramblings about how it was wrong to make my own decisions! Without your expert counsel! Please leave me alone, David. I’m finally happy now, and I intend to stay that way! Good-bye!" Alex hung up the phone and sighed deeply. She pulled Bryn into her arms and nestled into the soft, down bedding. She desperately wanted to forget the phone call.

Bryn began rubbing the tense muscles in her partner’s back. "Want to talk about it, Honey?"

Alex shrugged. David wants a reconciliation. He found a job here at Hughes Spalding Children’s hospital, as a medical social worker. He should have saved himself the time and trouble." Alex rubbed her temples and grimaced. Reading Alex’s body language, Bryn jumped out of bed quickly to retrieve her partner’s headache medicine and a glass of water.

"Here, Lex. Take this before you get sick. Mom and Dad will be really disappointed if we miss dinner with them tonight."

Alex frowned a little, but obediently swallowed the pills offered to her. It was difficult for the doctor to refuse Bryn anything.

"Good girl. Now, let’s talk about David. No bottling things up inside, remember?"

Alex smiled lopsidedly, although her expression was a little sad. "I remember. Mom!" The dark haired woman stood up and stretched. "Let’s make coffee and go out to the porch to talk."

Twenty minutes later Alex and Bryn were sitting on their porch wrapped in fluffy white robes and drinking steaming mugs of coffee. They loved to spend weekend mornings this way.

"Bryn, I’m not reconciling with David. Will you please just accept that and let’s move on with our lives. I’m happy now and I want to stay that way."

"Lex! He’s your brother! You need him. He’s the only blood family you have left now. Please just give him a chance. Obviously, he wants to make things right again."

Blue eyes began to flash with anger. "You’re my family! The only family I need! You and my patients are all I’ll ever need to be happy in this life. Let the past die, Bryn. I buried it long ago, and I’m not going to exhume it now! Alex stalked off angrily to take a shower.

Damn! Hearing from David must have reopened painful wounds! Maybe I’ll arrange to meet David and speak with him myself. I know Lex will come around if she has enough time. She misses him; I can see the hurt in her eyes whenever his name is mentioned. Time for some damage control. Bryn made her way to the shower to join her sulking partner, but not before retrieving David’s phone number from the caller I.D.

Some time later …

Alex pulled Bryn close, and tenderly kissed her soft blond head. "I’m so sorry I was cranky with you, Squeak," she whispered hoarsely. "None of this is your fault." Alex was already feeling guilty enough. The hospital had just called. A critically ill baby needed the doctor’s immediate attention, and she was on her way out the door. I had really looked forward to riding with Bryn today. She’s learning those jumps like a pro.

"It’s okay, Sweetheart. I know how much your brother hurt you. Don’t feel bad now, that was quite an apology you made to me in the shower." Bryn smirked a little as she slyly pinched her partner’s bottom.

"Ouch! Elizabeth Bryn O’Neill! You are sooo bad sometimes! In spite of her grumpy mood, Alex couldn’t help but laugh.

"And you love it, too! Bye, Sweetie." She gave Alex’s bottom another pinch as she walked out the door. "Call me as soon as you’re done. I’ll have my cell phone."

Alex kissed Bryn one last time and then reluctantly walked to her car, chuckling and carefully rubbing her behind.

As Bryn heard the BMW drive away, she hurried to the phone to make a call. It’s time I found out for myself exactly what David Christian Morgan, Jr. is really like.

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"Oh, fuck!" the surgeon cursed under her breath as she examined the critically ill infant. Diminutive Bailey Moore had just arrived via the hospital’s transport team. They should have transferred her here sooner! Like yesterday! God damned rural hospital! "She needs surgery right away. Set up the O.R. and call Dr. Schaeffer for anesthesiology," she barked to the nursing supervisor. "I’ll go talk to her family." Oh, joy! This day couldn’t get much better! The beautiful surgeon stalked out of the room to give tiny Bailey Moore’s father the bad news.

Alex removed her newly acquired reading glasses and squinted a little. A very nervous young man sat across from her as she sat at her antique, cherry wood desk. Dr. Morgan attempted to be as gentle as possible with the bewildered parent. "Bailey is a very sick little girl, Mr. Moore." Besides being 12 weeks early, a vessel in her heart has failed to close off after birth as it would normally. This is not unusual for such a premature infant. Ordinarily, surgery for Patent Ductus Arteriosis, or PDA is fairly routine. But Bailey’s weakened condition makes things far more complicated. As her heart surgeon, I’ll do my best to help her. Dr. Rose, the neonatologist assigned to Bailey’s case, will be working with me. He’ll answer any questions regarding her prematurity.

Mr. Moore was quite some distance from his comfort zone. Bailey’s mother remained in the small community hospital where Bailey had been delivered prematurely by Caesarean Section. Joseph Moore was young, a first time parent. He was exhausted, and afraid for his wife and daughter. His fear turned into anger as he lashed out at Alex. "I don’t know if I trust a woman operating on my little girl or not. I’ve always had male doctors!"

Oh, shit! One of those idiots! The already irritable Alex turned pale. "That’s your decision, Mr. Moore. If you prefer, Dr. Paul Silver can operate on your daughter. He’s an excellent surgeon. I’ll make the arrangements if you’d like."

Mr. Moore simply nodded and stood.

Alex picked up the phone and quickly made the arrangements. When young Bailey’s father remained rooted to the spot, Alex raised an eyebrow. "Now, if you’ll please excuse me, Mr. Moore. I need to make a phone call. In private."

The cold blue stare suddenly ate through the haze Joseph Moore seemed to be in. Intimidated, he turned around and left quickly.

As soon as Alex was certain that Mr. Moore was out of earshot, she stood up and slammed the door. The early morning call from her brother had set her back emotionally. And no one had ever minded that she carried two X chromosomes until now. Except maybe Olivia! She reached for her phone, needing to hear the soothing voice of her best friend, lover, and human security blanket. The person who completed her — Bryn.