Part 3
Gabrielle had been quiet for days. She could not figure out how to tell Xena that she was in love with her. Or for that matter, that she had to leave her. She knew that even if Xena returned her feelings that she would never be able to be with her fully because of her constant guilt emanating from the sins of her past. Gabrielle was not fool enough to think they could be together. But still she wanted to give her the chance to at least respond before she left. She owed her that much after all they had been through. Even if she was planning on sneaking out during the next mission. It was the only way Xena would let her leave. She would not understand that she could not bear to be around her after this conversation. She could barely bear it now and Xena did not even know yet. God, I have not felt this way since, Sanai she thought rubbing the locket around her neck. After all these years. She still could not part with it. “Sanai.” Gabrielle said absent mindedly.
“Who?” said Xena barely hearing the whisper coming from Gabrielle.
“Huh? Oh nothing.” said Gabrielle as she turned away from the fire, stood and walked to the edge of camp.
“Dinners ready. I am going for a walk.” Said Gabrielle blankly.
“Wait, aren’t you going to eat?” asked Xena hopeful that food would get her friend to respond. It was a long shot, but she was worried about her. Ever since her memory had returned after Eli had brought them back, Gabrielle had been quiet and tense. Like she was building up to something. Xena did not know what, but she did not like the feel of it. And she was rubbing the locket again. No matter what she did she could never get her to talk about where it came from. Though she had tried many times, Gabrielle was worse than her on the subject.
“No, I’m not hungry.” Said Gabrielle as she was walking away. “Ill be back, don’t wait up.”
Now that she was alone, she could breathe. She Knew Xena could tell something was going on. She always doted on her when she did. Asking unnecessary questions. Anything to try and get her to talk. She felt like she could not hide even her thoughts from Xena these days. So telling her was best. Before she figured out. Not tonight though. Tonight, she would wait a few candle marks and head back when Xena would be asleep. She did not want to be questioned about this tonight.
She could see Xena’s form in her bedroll and the fire banked from a good distance away from camp. She internally let out a sigh of relief. Noting Xena could hear the smallest of sounds even in her sleep. She approached slowly and moved her bed roll a few feet from Xena.
She slid in and turned on her side facing Xena, rested her head and closed her eyes. She was home free.
“Why were you gone so long?” said Xena.
Suddenly she opened her eyes and she was staring into crystal blue ones.
“Xena, I just had a lot on my mind. I needed to work it out is all.” Said Gabrielle closing her eyes, trying to let the topic drop so she would not have to explain further. A tactic that failed.
“Gabrielle, what is going on with you? I have given you as much space as I can, but you are scaring me. Why are you so closed off? It’s not like you.” Said Xena Concern saturating her voice.
Gabrielle rubbed her locket in thought. “Not tonight Xena. Please.” She implored her darkhaired friend.
“I need to rest.” She begged slightly hoping Xena would let her get away with not speaking.
But those hopes died as soon as Xena sat up in her bedroll.
“Gabrielle, we are not doing anything until you tell me what is wrong.” She said in a matter-of-fact tone staring blankly ahead.
Gabrielle sat up in defeat knowing that she would not let this go. So she took a deep breath and began to speak.
“Xena.” She said straightening.” I just want to say, before I tell you, this will not change our lives, I promise. It is just something I think you have a right to know. I accept any response you have to this. It has just been hard to come to terms with. And please let me finish first before responding ok?” Said Gabrielle.
“Okayyy.” Said Xena Inquisitively.
“So, when we died. I was sad. But I had come to terms with this because all my choices were my own. But after, we still ended up separated, regardless of if I was in hell or heaven. Just when I thought I had lost you to evil completely, Eli brought us back. You lost your sense of self and memories and it was like losing you all over again. I was not sure, once again if I would ever get you back. It made me very protective of you. If this were the only part of you left, I would protect you with my life.” She looked at Xena staring at her intently. She was so engrossed in speaking she had not notice Xena had moved on to her bedroll with her.
Deep breath.
“But then you found yourself and your memories again and I was grateful but also terrified.” Said Gabrielle.
“But why?!” said Xena without realizing she was speaking out loud.
“When I’m finished, remember?” She said.
Xena nodded apologetically.
“I was scared because what I am going to say, would have been much easier to say had you not regained your memory. Then I felt selfish. I was thinking of me not you. But I say all that to say Xena, I, I.” she put her head in her hands in frustration.
Another deep breath. “I am in love with you. I am not sure when exactly it happened, but it did. As I said before. It is just something I must deal with, and it will not change our lives. I just thought I should tell you.” She said not looking up. Afraid to.
Then she felt fingers lift her chin as she stared into blue eyes. They stayed like that for what seemed like ages. Then finally Xena spoke.
“Gabrielle, I love you. You know that.” Spoke Xena slowly.
Here we go. What did you expect Gabrielle thought to herself?
“But we can’t be together. You know I don’t deserve that.” Said Xena as she pierced Gabrielle’s eyes with her own.
“Now can we just move past this? I know you will get over this, I promise you will.” Xena said inwardly pleading that the small blonde would agree and try and move on.
Gabrielle grabbed her locket once again. Considering arguing with Xena. But she knew better. At least she got a straight answer this time around, thinking back to the day she had realized Sanai would never return and she would never be with her. She was jolted out of her thoughts when she saw Xena still staring at her waiting for a response.
“Ok. I will respect that.” Said Gabrielle surprising Xena.
Let’s get some rest we have to reach Lamia in a few days’ time.” Said Gabrielle as she settled back into her bedroll.
Xena did the same as she put her arm around the blonde after pulling her bedroll right next to hers. She pulled Gabrielle close.
Suddenly she felt small fingers wrap around her wrist and lift her arm and place it at her side.
“Not tonight Xena.” said Gabrielle. “I need space ok.”
Xena nodded in sadness.
A few nights later, it felt like things had returned to normal. Gabrielle had been her more talkative normal self. Xena began to settle back into their routine. She was surprised. But Gabrielle had been true to her word and respected what Xena had asked. But it was nagging at her why it had been so easy for her to do so. But she left well enough alone. When she looked up from sharpening her stone after dinner, she saw the blonde holding the locket again. And before she knew it the question slipped out.
“Are you ever going to tell me why you keep that locket?” she gazed at it pensively. She did not like that she kept that secret from her. She knew Gabrielle was allowed her secrets. But she usually wore her heart on her sleeve unable to hide even the smallest secret from Xena for extended periods of time. But when it came to that locket all Xena ever got was silence and then she would relent because she could tell it caused Gabrielle great pain.
“No.” said Gabrielle. It was the first verbal answer she had given regarding the locket since the first time Xena had asked all those years ago when they had first started traveling together. Xena decided to push it further.
“But why, why wont you talk about? It is obvious you need to. That’s what I’m here for.” Said Xena sounding more concerned for Gabrielle than she was for herself.
“No Xena. You know the locket, is off limits.” Said Gabrielle sternly in a low deep tone.
“But why wo- “she was cut off when Gabrielle stood.
“Why huh, why do you suddenly want to talk about my locket? You’ve never cared before. Doesn’t matter. I can’t talk about it. Ever. I need to breathe. I’m going for a walk. Don’t wait up.” She said grabbing the locket feeling the pang of hurt that came with the thought of it.
Xena stared at the space that Gabrielle had been standing in with awe. She had never heard the blonde openly aggressively tell her no in that manner. It was a shock to her system.
Meanwhile Gabrielle had walked significantly far without thinking. All the while thinking of Sanai. Remembering how angry she had been with her the last time she had seen those hazel eyes. She felt guilty and now she knew she would never have the pleasure of feeling those strong arms around her holding her ever again. She’s probably dead by now. It’s my fault that she is.
“Who am I kidding? I didn’t deserve Sanai and I don’t deserve Xena either.” She said to herself out loud.
Her dreams of late had all been of Sanai. Xena’s rejection brought her right back to the night she had let go of ever seeing Sanai again. Now she was arriving at the same place with Xena. Only this time out of necessity for them both.
When Gabrielle returned to camp she went over her plan as she lay in her bedroll. Xena was awake but she knew after that confrontation earlier Xena would not try to conversate now. So, she mentally noted that when they reached Lamia she could not show the slightest bit of hesitation on Xenas plan or she would suspect. They were Arriving tomorrow, and she would go to the next neighboring village to ask for help from Xena’s friend Kalin and his men, they would need all the help they could get to defend the village from the Warlord Ajari. Said to be the meanest warlord in Africa. Only driven out by a demi Goddess who had appeared years ago. Said to be the daughter of Athena but also the daughter of one of the members of the tribes in Africa. But she was Mysterious. Managing to keep her name a secret this entire time. Doing the same as Hercules traveling around Africa helping people in need.
She would go get Kalin. Send him to Xena and she would be on her way. She wanted to say something to say goodbye to her now, in the morning but she knew if she did, it would tip Xena off and she’d never let her out of her sight. So, she stayed quiet. Staring up at the night sky as a tear slid down her left cheek.
Xena lay across the camp, watching Gabrielle so deep in thought that she did not notice Xena staring intently at her. Something was wrong still. And it had to do with that locket. But it was clear that her green-eyed companion would never speak of it. She had to let it go. She rolled over and let her dreams take her.
When Sanai Arrived in Lamia, with ten of her best warriors that Athena had transported for her she was tense.
“Sanai, we will Stop Ajari here for good. We did it in Africa, we can do it here too.” Said Mari, her next in charge and a dear friend.
“I know. I just don’t want him taking it out on anyone in this land before we do.” She said with a heavy heart.
As they approached, she noticed men wearing Ajari’s colors were torturing the villagers. She signaled for her warriors to surround them.
“Aanval!!” she yelled as her warriors began charging the men.
“Aaaaahhhhhh.” Grunted Sanai as she ran into battle.
Pulling her sword, she arrived at Mari’s back. Ready to be attacked.
The clash of weapons began as they fought valiantly.
Athena looked on in wonder at her little one. She had learned well and made both sets of her parents proud. She was a fierce and brave but most of all she cared. She was her father’s daughter with a heart of gold. She healed as much as she fought. She never took her strength for granted. She always wanted to protect her in these battles, but Sanai insisted that she do it on her own. So, Athena complied. Her little one deserved the world. So, she decided to give her another chance with the one who held her heart. She knew Gabrielle and Xena were soulmates. But that chapter deserved to be closed. Although Athena continued watch over Gabrielle, Sanai insisted she not be told about her life only that she was safe and protected. Athena agreed not to break Gabrielle’s privacy. But both deserved the right to choose. Because sometimes, love just happens. No explanation needed.
Just as Athena made her exit. A certain Warrior Princess, partner in tow ran into the action of the fight.
Back-to-back they fought until all their immediate foes were unconscious. Just then, Gabrielle looked up and caught sight of red brown curly hair spilling over dust-colored shoulders, her sword thrashing into her enemies as she fought back-to-back with her companion and she froze. Her heart began to beat erratically in her chest and her head began to spin. “It cant be.” Gabrielle said barely audible.
Xena turned to look at Gabrielle and saw the change of her nature.” Gabrielle?” said Xena confused at her friend’s sudden Paralysis.
“Sanai?” Gabrielle whispered. Right before she charged the men surrounding the pair, leaving a confused and shocked Xena standing there with her thoughts.
Sais in hand the blonde kicked, parried, swung and punched seemingly effortlessly until she reached the back of the warrior she sought.
And as the last man fell unconscious at Sanai’s hand, she heard a familiar voice barely louder than a Whisper.
“Sanai? Sanai? Is that you.?” Said Gabrielle, on the verge of tears, her chest heaving in anticipation.
She turned to face the voice and found herself staring into Emerald green eyes once again. Her breath caught and she found herself being enveloped once again in small arms as she heard sais hit the ground. It took her a while to respond to the voice that was now speaking through tears. She could not believe what she was seeing.
“I thought you were, dead.” Cried Gabrielle a little above a whisper. Her eyes wide as she pulled back and stared into Hazel eyes once again, pushing red brown curls aside to see a dust colored face.
Sanai grabbed the sides of Gabrielle’s head and touched it gently to her own and her closed her eyes.
Then she spoke before opening them.” Hi little one. It’s been a long time.”
They stood there in that strange embrace staring for what seemed like ages.
Xena reached the warrior’s companion and extended a hand in friendship. Then the 2 looked on in silence at their friends inquisitively. They were oblivious to anyone or anything around them. Staring at each other like they had each seen a ghost. She noticed that the blonde held fast to the warrior as if she were going to lose her forever. Suddenly she felt like there were huge butterflies flapping around in her stomach. She had never seen Gabrielle react that way to anyone but her before. Suddenly her breathing became erratic at the thought.
Suddenly Sanai remembered where she was and why. She broke eye contact and looked to her warriors who were staring at her intently. Then she called out. “Mari, come.”
And suddenly Gabrielle saw her blonde curly haired companion with skin the color of clay appear at her side.
“Yes my Queen.” Said Mari.
She turned to face her as Xena reached Gabrielle.
“I will go and talk to Ajari. See if I can get him to leave this land and return to our own.” She said sternly.
“And if he doesn’t agree?” Mari Asked.
“Then we capture him and take him home ourselves. In the meantime, make camp at the north end of the village and rest with the men until I return.” She commanded.
“What about her?” Mari said nodding towards Gabrielle.
“What about her?” said Sanai.
“It’s her isn’t it? The one you spoke of. It’s Gabrielle. She looks different than you described. But I have never seen you react that way to anyone that way. And I knew it must be.
“Yes. It is. She does seem different, mother told me she was traveling with a warrior. Seems she’s become one herself.” Said Sanai realizing how much they had both changed. She glanced Gabrielle standing next to her companion. Wondered what her life was like now. Then she hung her head realizing she did not deserve to know.
Xena walked up to Gabrielle. Her eyes still locked on the hazel eyed warrior.
“Gabrielle?” Xena said as she picked up her sais to hand it to her. No response came so she spoke again.
“Gabrielle, who was that?” she said trying to sound as normal as possible but her voice betraying her.
“She’s…” Gabrielle’s voice broke off.
She began clutching the locket again as Xena waited for an answer. An answer that never came as Gabrielle saw Sanai and her companion finish their conversation. She had to speak to her. She walked towards Sanai as she saw her companion begin to walk away and Xena followed suit.
As she reached Sanai she was at a loss for words. All four stood there in silence.
Finally, Mari broke the silence.
“Thank you, friends, for helping us. I am Mari.” She said staring at the warrior princess.
“And you are?” she asked.
“I am Xena. This is Gabrielle.” Xena said.
“This is my queen Sanai.” Said Mari.
“Come Xena let me speak with you while these 2 get re acquainted.” She said letting Xena lead the way.
Xena turned her head to look back at Gabrielle who stood there entranced by the hazel eyed warrior.
“So.” Said Xena as she walked with Mari.
“Why are you here to fight Ajari?” asked Xena
“Well, to shorten a long story, my queen, Sanai, she’s the daughter of Amali one of the Original Omi tribe. But also, she is the daughter of Athena. Which makes her a demi Godess. She has the power of what our people call the Engels. These are special children able to bend and manipulate water to use as weapons and healing tools.”
Xena nodded as if she wanted Mari to continue.
“Well, she remained hidden from the world because the Greek Gods found out about Amali and Athena’s love and caused the war of the Africas and Amali’s death. At the time they had no idea about Sanai. She was 3. Athena knew that she had to give her up to save her or the other Gods would kill her for living with her mother, being born of mortal flesh. So, she found a small village and a couple who had been baren and they agreed. So, for 13 years her adoptive parents raised her and were given instructions to send her to Athena’s temple on her 16th birthday.
So, when she arrived, she met her birth mother, Athena for the first time. Now she could tell who she chose that she was the daughter of Athena. And here is where she came to us. She had a choice to come to Africa immediately to help all the tribes unite and become one. Or lose her father’s people forever.”
“But what does that have to do with Ajari being here?” said Xena
“Well, Ajari was the warlord Sanai defeated to restore her father’s people. He escaped to come here. He knew he could not defeat her there, his resources had begun to deplete. So, he has come here to regain more. He plans to return to Africa and to regain the land with a new Army. But if she can defeat and capture him before he can replenish his army then Greece and Africa will be safe from him for good.” Mari Finished.
Xena stared for a moment. “I see. Well, you will have help. We came here to stop him from recruiting soldiers from this land. Gabrielle will be going to the next village to find my friend Kalin and his men in the morning.” Said Xena.
“Thank you.” Mari said as she began to head towards her men.
“Wait.” Said Xena.” Just one more question. How did Gabrielle and Sanai meet?”
“I wish I could tell you but, I cannot betray my queen’s confidence. She is extremely sensitive when it comes to her. She’s barely spoken of her at all and only to me.” Said Mari with a worried look as she gazed at her queen.
“I understand.” said Xena placing a hand on Mari’s shoulder.
What did Sanai mean to Gabrielle? Thought Xena. The way they reacted to each other after the battle gave Xena an uneasy feeling. Just what had happened between Gabrielle and Sanai? She was scared of the answer.
“Sanai.” Said Gabrielle to the warriors back.
“No little one. It’s best if we don’t do this at all.” Said Sanai
She grabbed Sanai’s shoulders and turned her around to face her.
“Sanai. Please? I thought you were dead for so long.” Said Gabrielle. After a long pause passed between them. Sanai spoke.
“Ok. I guess I could leave in the morning to talk to Ajari.” She spoke. Why don’t you retrieve your things and camp with me alone tonight.”
“Alright”. Said Gabrielle.
“Send Mari Gabrielle. I need to speak with her about the men. When I am done speaking with her, I will send her to get you, ok little one?”
Gabrielle nodded in agreement and walked away.
After giving Mari a quickly written note to Gabrielle. Sanai set off.
She went to the clearing.
“Katsina, Come.” She said as her black Pegasus landed at her side.
She mounted her and looked back at the camp.
“I’m sorry my little one. I am not ready yet. Not sure if I will ever be. But I am glad you found a home.” She spoke.
“Katsina, make haste. We must not waste time.” With that Katsina began her gallop and leapt into the sky. she was gone.
Mari approached Xena’s camp with sadness. She knew Gabrielle had been tricked but she could not bear to see her queen in pain. She was the most sensitive warrior she had ever met.
She saw Gabrielle gathering up her things with a very confused Xena looking on.
“Gabrielle.” She spoke as Gabrielle turned and looked directly into her brown eyes.
“Mari.” Said Gabrielle. “She’s gone isn’t she.”
“Yes, she sends her apology and this letter” she said placing the letter in Gabrielle’s hand.
Before she turned and walked away. Mari spoke hoping Xena wasn’t fully within earshot.
“She loves you, Gabrielle, I know she broke your heart. But she had a choice to make. It wasn’t an easy one.”
“What choice Mari?” Gabrielle said hurt lingering in her eyes.
“She should be the one to tell you. Not me.” Mari spoke as she disappeared from their camp leaving Gabrielle standing there note in hand.
Xena walked up to Gabrielle from behind Carefully and put her hand on her shoulder.
“Do you want to talk?.” Said Xena quietly.
“Maybe later.” Said Gabrielle grabbing her sais and heading toward the lake nearby.
She sat on the largest rock as she had done all those years ago and she opened the scroll and read.
Here we are again little one,
First let me say that I am sorry that I broke my promise to you, all those years ago. I was wrong but I could not bring myself to face you. I am deeply sorry that I have left you again. But I had to. I am not sure if I could ever face you. But know that I am happy you found a home with Xena. I can tell she loves you as much as I do. I see that you still wear my locket. I am honored. Know that you still have my heart. Always beautiful. I love you forever. ,Sanai
Gabrielle returned to camp and Xena couldn’t help but notice that her face was tear stained. She had been crying.
“Gabrielle, I can’t stand to see you like this. Please tell me what’s going on? Who is Sanai to you?” asked Xena desperately as she placed her hands on Gabrielle’s shoulders pulling her to a seat on a log by the fire.
“I can’t Xena. “she said barely whispering.
“Gabrielle, please tell me. You can’t hold this inside anymore.” She said.
“She left me again Xena. Now I will never see her again.” said Gabrielle holding the scroll up.
Xena grabbed the scroll and read hesitantly. Not sure if she should or wanted to.
After reading the scroll Xena realized that this was why the locket was so important. It’s Like she could have written this letter herself and that was scary. She could tell that her words were soaked in emotion. With fear in her heart, she turned to Gabrielle and asked her what happened between them. She had to know.
“We, we were best friends, since were young. She was 3 and I was 2. Apparently, I was taken and she was annoyed. But it was over as soon I looked into those hazel eyes.” Said Gabrielle with a chuckle through her tears.
“ We were thick as thieves growing up. She always looked after me. Protected me. Just like you do. I was an annoying little kid and she loved me with all her heart and always reminded me that she did. “said Gabrielle as she looked up to see Xena staring into her eyes intently.
“Go on, please.” Said Xena
“On the night of her 10th birthday we walked by the lake near her house and she gave me the locket she had gotten for her birthday.” She said absent mindedly grabbing the locket.
“She told me as long as I had the locket, I had her heart. Then a few days before her 16th birthday she got a letter sending her on a journey for the actual day of her birthday. Things were strained between us at the time. I knew she had been keeping things from me for a while. I was angry. So I yelled at her the night she told me she was leaving. I told her to go. She told me she would sort things out between us when she returned. When she left me, she was in tears. Then days went by and she hadn’t returned I began to worry. I went to her house every other day waiting for her. And then a letter arrived. It said that she had learned of her birth parents, that she had to restore her father’s people. And that her father passed away and that it needed her immediate attention. She said that she would return to me in a few months to explain everything in person.” said Gabrielle the tears beginning to flow again.
“But she never returned Xena. It took me years to let her go. To accept that I would never see her again.” She finished.
Xena was dumbfounded. Why had Gabrielle kept something this big from her for so long. Refused to talk about it. She adjusted forward in her seat. Was she in love with her? She did not have the right to ask that. She hated to see Gabrielle hurting like this. Not when she was so used to her being so strong. It became clear to Xena then, that Gabrielle was better at holding things in than she had thought up until now.
“Well, I will always be here.” She said as she embraced her little blonde.
“I need to find her Xena. I want so desperately to speak with her it hurts.” She said her emotions spilling out of her mouth.
“We have a mission Gabrielle. We can’t bail.” Said Xena sounding more irritated than she had originally planned to. Suddenly she felt fear at the thought of Gabrielle speaking alone with Sanai. But she pushed the feeling aside.
Gabrielle stared curiously into those sapphire eyes. Was that anger in Xena’s voice. It couldn’t be. She had just rejected her nights before.
“Xena I would never do that. I will go to retrieve Kalin and his men in the morning as planned. Then you will have all the help you need to defend the village. She said with a tone that made Xena feel secure.
“I am going to write for a while Xena. You get some rest.” Said Gabrielle.
She was curiously relieved that Xena hadn’t noticed that she used the word you and not we.
The next Morning Sanai found herself on her way back to the village. She loved flying with Katsina. It was so quiet and clear. No one but her up here. It was peaceful. She knew that Ajari would refuse to return home and her plan was underway. She knew him well. He would send men a few days ahead of him to take the village. And while they were doing that she could return to his camp and capture him herself, while Mari and her men defended the village.
If this went well he would never be free to torment any land again.
Gabrielle was up early. She bathed and ate without waking Xena. She was about to head back to camp from the north end of the village after retrieving some last minute food for her journey, when she heard a horse neighing in the clearing of the woods. So, she decided to investigate.
She walked into the clearing just in time to see Katsina and Sanai land. Sanai dismounted her Pegasus and turned to see the blonde staring as she walked up.
“Hi, beautiful.” Was all Sanai could speak. She wasn’t sure she had the right to call her that anymore.
“I thought you would not return.” said Gabrielle with hesitation. Noticing the moment was awkward she changed the subject.
“Is, is that a black Pegasus?” said Gabrielle in fascination.
“Yes.” said Sanai ash she turned to face the animal with a smile and held out her hand. “Katsina, come.”
“Little one, this is Katsina, my Pegasus, the only female one in existence in fact.” she spoke proudly. “Katsina, this is Gabrielle, the one I told you about.”
Gabrielle thought it curious that she spoke to the horse like a human. But then again, Xena did the same with Argo. She reached a hand out to slide over Katsina’s coat. And she put her head to Katsina’s instinctively. And suddenly she heard a voice in her mind. ‘Hello, little one it is nice to finally meet you.’
Gabrielle jumped back with a gasp.
“What is it little one? She won’t hurt you. I promise.” Said Sanai panicking.
“I, she spoke to me.” said Gabrielle fearing she sounded insane. ”I heard her voice in my mind.”
This caused Sanai to chuckle. She must be connected to her because of me. After all these years little one, you still share my heart.
“It’s ok. She shares my thoughts and I hers. You must be connected to her as well because of me. You share my he-“ Sanai’ s words trailed off as she realized what it was she was saying out loud.
“Please Sanai, continue.” Said the blonde. Noticing the blonde wanted to talk about the past Sanai changed the subject immediately.
“I have to speak with Mari.” she said looking in the direction of her men’s camp. “I know Ajari, after I spoke to him, he is going to speed up his plans of recruiting from this village by at least a few days. So Mari and my men will defend this village and I return to his camp and capture him. Then we can take him back to Africa.” She spoke abruptly.
It had been years, but Gabrielle still recognized the tone that meant she was not going to speak on a particular topic. Xena had been doing that to her for years.
“I see. Well I am going to retrieve Xena’s friend Kalin and his men in the next village while Xena and Mari set up a defense here. They will have all the help they need.” Said Gabrielle.
Suddenly Sanai turned to her and wrapped her strong arms around her.” Please be careful my little one. You still mean everything to me. I love you forever.” She said as she instructed Katsina to rest.
“I have to say goodbye to Xena.” Said Gabrielle.
Then she turned to walk back to their camp on the other end of the village.
“I thought maybe you had already gone.” said Xena as she walked up. “Where were you?” She was surprised at her own question. She sounded like a jealous lover.
Gabrielle stared in question into those azure eyes. Then she looked away.
“Just picking up extra food for my journey. With luck Kalin and his men will be entering the village before dusk if I have anything to do with it.” She said in the happiest tone she could.
“Why don’t you go and speak to Mari, I believe she and Sanai have a plan in motion to deal with Ajari.” She said.
“Ok.” Was all Xena could say in response. Was she out talking to Sanai? Alone? Doesn’t matter, when this is all over maybe they could travel to Athens do some relaxing. Go to a play, shop. Xena hated all those things. But her little green-eyed blonde enjoyed them immensely. She wanted to make it up to her for making it seem like she didn’t return her feelings of love. But she couldn’t. She did not deserve someone like Gabrielle to love her. She saw Mari standing at the edge of the village and waved.
Gabrielle found herself at her destination by mid morning hours. She moved pretty fast. She had run into a few thugs at one point but she had disposed of them quickly enough. When she walked into the village it wasn’t hard for her to locate Kalin’s camp.
“So Xena needs my help?” said Kalin.
“Yes, this warlord almost wiped my best friend’s people out.” She said the words slipping out of her mouth.
“Well, we can be ready to leave with you in a couple of hours.” Said Kalin.
“Actually, I’m not going with you I have some business to take care of in Athens. But can you give Xena this scroll for me when you get there. She will be expecting you before dusk if you can. Do you know the way to Lamia?” asked Gabrielle as she finished explaining.
“Yes, we pass through the village often enough. But are you sure you don’t want to wait until after everything to go to Athens. From what you described, it sounds like Xena will need all the help she can get.” Implored Kalin.
“You guys have plenty of help. This is something I have to do, it’s important.” She said.
“Alright friend.” he said clasping Gabrielle’s hand “Gods speed.”
“You too Kalin.” She said as she turned to head to the stables to buy a horse. She’d been saving dinars for a while now telling extra stories while Xena was off being a hero or having private time to herself. She had more than enough to get one.
She went to the stable and purchased a beautiful white horse with brown spots.
She knew she had to move faster than normal. She didn’t lie to Kalin. She would go to Athens which was only a candle mark away. She just wasn’t going to stay there. That meant she had 4 candle marks to put some distance between her and Xena, for good. Being in love with her, and seeing Sanai and being rejected a second time was too much to bear. She had to leave. She just hoped Xena could forgive her for falling in love. As for Sanai, well she never had a chance with her.
Kalin Reached Lamia in record time. He instructed his men to make camp while he went to find Xena.
“Kalin.” Xena said extended her hand. “Thank you for coming friend. I appreciate it.”
“Not at all Xena anytime.” He said clasping her arm.
“Where’s Gabrielle I need to speak with her.”
“She’s not with us.” Kalin said confused by the question. “she gave me this scroll for you, said she had some business in Athens, gave me the impression you knew she might be heading in that direction.”
“No. I didn’t know.” Xena said holding the scroll in her hand staring at it. “Why don’t you go and speak with Mari. She is the blonde over there with clay colored skin. She can get you up to speed and then you guys can settle in for the evening.” She said blankly.
“Ok Xena. I’ll see you in the morning.” He said as he walked away.
What business could Gabrielle possibly have in Athens at a time like this. Now she was going to be worried about her during this battle. I guess maybe I should read the letter before I judge. She thought as she reached camp feeling a pit at the bottom of her stomach.
Xena,
First let me say that I am sorry I had to leave you like this. In the middle of a mission. But I made sure that that you have all the help you need. You will be fine Xena you don’t need me. You are beautiful, smart, intelligent and you have a good heart. Remember solan when you need to figure out the right thing to do. It will always come to you. I could not be with you while being in love with you and not have those feelings returned. I had to choose me first Xena. I know you will understand. I am sincerely sorry for lying, making you think that everything could be as it was before. But I needed you to let me go. Please don’t come after me. And have a good life Xena you deserve it. Remember always that I love you.
Gabrielle
Xena felt like her light was fading. It was all her fault. She had let Gabrielle think she didn’t return her feelings. Suddenly all her moods and actions for the past few moons made perfect sense. She had been planning this. She just needed a distraction. This mission gave her the perfect cover. It being her own idea for Gabrielle to retrieve Kalin made it easy for Gabrielle to leave. She knew that I would never leave a battle that I had promised to help with.
“Gabrielle.” Was all Xena could say as a tear slid down her left cheek. She lay back on her bed roll and waited for sleep to take her.
The next morning the battle went as planned. Sanai set out and Ajari’s men showed up at the village. It took a while but Xena, Mari, Kalin and all the men defeated them. Sanai was able to capture Ajari.
When Sanai returned to camp she instructed Mari to take her men and Ajari back to Africa. She called on Athena, and she transported them Immediately. Kalin returned to his village with his men and Xena was off to find Gabrielle.
Sanai wanted time alone, she hadn’t realized that seeing Gabrielle would bring her such Sorrow. She was still in love with her little one after all these years.
She picked a town at random and decided to get a room for the night. She left Katsina in the clearing knowing she would come when needed. She got her room and settled in for the evening.
To Be Continued....