Disclaimers: None. All of the characters are mine. Please excuse any grammatical errors. The story is complete, but will be posted in parts.
Warning/Sex: This story does involve a consensual loving and sexual relationship between two adult women. There are a few “bad” words here and there. As some of you may know, our ladies are very modern. If this offends you, is illegal where you live, or if you are underage—please consider another story.
Note to the reader: “One Little Bit” is the third story in what one of my reader's labeled “The Loose Change” series (many thanks to my reader, you know who you are!). The previous two stories, “New Quarters” and its predecessor and lead story, “Turning on a Dime,” can be found in my Author's page). It is recommended that the previous stories be read first in order to understand how life brought this pair together and how and why they find themselves doing what they are doing now. This series is the story of the coming together of Karen Larsen and Adriana Marcos and their love and life. Two remarkable women with very different pasts and one common destiny. The stories depict how the powerful force of true, genuine love can overcome all obstacles and even make the impossible possible. I hope everyone enjoys this story as much the others. As always I appreciate comments and ideas . Please write to me at email@example.com . Hearing from you encourages me to continue writing and posting. Your comments and advice also make me a better writer. And be warned: Sometimes you may find your input in the story!
Also, thanks to another one of my readers for contributing the name ‘Peanut Crunchie' to the story -- you also know who you are!). My very special thanks to TiGirl, my lovely friend -- who although reluctant to the pregnancy (LOL) -- continued to provide technical advice and constant support. I have no words to express my gratitude, and that alone -- coming from one who writes endlessly -- says a lot! J
© 2012 . All rights reserved. This story, or any of its parts, may not be reproduced without the prior express permission of the author.
Part 3 of Loose Change Series - The Addy and Karen series, starring Alex:
(01) Turning on a Dime
(02) New Quarters
(03) One Little Bit
(04) Joint Venture
The little one climbed all over the woman sitting in the patio. “Mommy Karen, did you zee me flying my kite?”
“Yes, I did! You did great!” She hugged the little, sweaty body on her lap and combed the little one's shoulder length blonde hair. The woman's green eyes, however, were fixed like beams of light on the fast approaching figure coming from the rolling hills. The red sun setting on the background, framed the figure as she walked closer. She was wearing tight blue jeans that hugged her hips and an open a button-down sweater that marked every one of her curves. One could hardly tell what was more breathtaking, the smile on the approaching woman's face, the sun setting behind her, the beaming green eyes drawing her closer, or the laughter of the child.
The approaching woman grinned when she saw the little one all over her mother. The green eyes crinkled with laughter when they realized that the approaching woman was tangled up in the strings of a kite. Karen laughed hysterically, bringing her hand to her mouth in an attempt to control herself. The little one loved to see her mom laugh, so she laughed too.
“Mommy Addy, got all tanwled wizth the sztring. The kite came…poof ….down and I ran and I ran and I took it and I ran, and I ran and gave it to Mommy Addy and I got the ztring and gave it to Mommy but it got into a ball and then it was all like this.” The little one put her tiny hands together and move them around signaling the shape of a ball.
Karen laughed as she heard the little one's explanation. “Hum! I can see that!” Then looking at Addy she said, “You are a menace! I don't know who the kid is around here.”
Addy grinned, and looking at the little one, she opened her eyes wide and made a funny face. “I had too much help bringing the kite down.”
Alex imitated the look on her mom's face also opening her gorgeous green eyes really wide.
“Come on inside, nut case! Let me get the scissors and free you from your predicament.”
Addy continued to make funny faces crinkling her nose as she looked at the two. Alex laughed and imitated her mom's funny faces. The two of them continued mimicking each other until they got inside the house.
“I think the two of you have had enough playing this evening.” The little one was hitched on Karen's hip. Once inside, Karen set her on the floor and opened one of the kitchen drawers. “Let me see if we can cut Mommy Addy lose, although….” Karen pretended to hesitate. “Maybe we should leave her like that and send her right to bed. What do you think, Alex? Should we leave her like that? I can take care of her later.”
Addy grimaced, and whispered. “You wish!”
“No, Mommy, she can't zwleep like that.”
Karen smiled. “Good. Maybe she shouldn't sleep!” Addy grinned, as Karen freed her from her entanglement.
Alex had a serious face now wondering why Mommy Karen didn't want Mommy Addy to sleep.
“Now that I've solved Mommy Addy's problem, let's go upstairs, young lady, you need a bath, you are rather stinky, you know!!” Addy looked at Alex and raised her eyebrows. Alex grinned looking at Addy. She was always looking at Addy for approval, encouragement or maybe just for the love she always found in her face.
Alex adored her. It most likely had to do with the fact that when they were together Addy did not behave older than a two year old, so she was Alex's perfect playmate. Karen took her upstairs for a bath and Addy remained in the kitchen and started dinner preparations.
Addy could hear the little voice that filled her heart as she kept retelling Karen the adventure with the kite and how Mommy Addy almost fell with the string, and how high the kite had gone reaching the clouds, and how pretty the kite was, and all sorts of happenings with the kite. “Why did the kite fall Mommy Karen? Can we buy more ztring? Karen was trying to come up with answers to the zillion questions. Alex was insatiable when she started her questioning.
“Addy, she drives me mad when she starts with all the questions, what should I do? I don't even know what to answer sometimes!” And this statement came from a woman who had the IQ of a genius and several diplomas to prove it. Addy loved Alex's inquisitive mind and was of the opinion that she should not be discouraged. “Curiosity is a good thing, who knows what it might lead to.” Karen's response was always the same. “Uuugh!”
Addy smiled as she heard them talk. Later there was some singing. Karen figured out that one way to stop Alex's inquisition was to start singing, which Alex also loved. So they began what came to be known as bathtub songs. Of course, there were songs for almost every occasion, walk song, car songs, etc. When Addy heard the singing, she started to laugh.
After dinner, they had a routine where they all sat to read stories. They enjoyed the quiet group reading, but the gathering had the intention to also create in Alex a desire to read and learn. It worked. The little one had her own reading tablet filed with educational games and stories and the women took turns reading to her and practicing all sorts of educational activities in the tablet.
Alex developed such a taste for this sort of activity that at times, the house would be really quiet and there would be no sign of her anywhere. Noticing the silence, immediately, either Addy or Karen would call for her.
“Aaaaalex…where are youuuu?” “Here Mommy! I'm weading.” She was only two and couldn't read, but she would be found sitting in the huge recliner, or lying down on the sofa or on some place on the floor anywhere in the house pretending to read or just looking at the pictures. Sometimes she crossed her legs, just to look like either one of her moms when they read.
When Karen or Addy came over to where she had answered from, they couldn't help but laugh at the picture of the little one pretending to read. Sometimes she even wore play sun glasses just because she wanted to look like Mommy Addy when she read. The little one was a sight!
While reading, the phone rang and it was Laurie. Addy went upstairs to talk not wanting to disturb the readers. When Addy came back down about twenty minutes later, she found mother and daughter asleep on the sofa. Karen was holding Alex in her arms, apparently both had fallen asleep after reading a story. It was an adoring sight. Addy couldn't resist and took a picture of them. “This will make a perfect computer wallpaper.” After taking the picture Addy woke her up, “Sweetie, let's get Alex to bed, come on.” She took Alex from Karen's arms. A sleepy Karen slowly got up too. “What time is it? Is everything okay with Laurie?”
“Yes, everything is fine. I'll tell you about it later. Let's take sleeping beauty here to bed, come on.”
Alex also woke up a little bit, but soon dropped her head on Addy's shoulder. An adoring, sleepy little voice was heard. “Mooommy Addy.” She also pronounced the ‘d's” and the ‘t's' like Karen, with that beautiful Scottish accent Addy loved so much. Addy was crazy about her precious doll. She'd melt whenever Alex called her name pronouncing the double ‘Ds.' Alex's arms went around Addy's neck, clinging to her like a little Koala bear. Addy kissed her tenderly. “Ummm, little bit, you smell so good!” Alex squirmed in her arms enchanted by the comment and fell back to sleep immediately after. She held on tight to Addy. The three went upstairs.
“Sucker!” Karen whispered.
Addy smirked as she caressed the little one's head with her chin. “You are jealous of my other girl!”
Karen slapped her in the butt and followed enjoying how Alex hung to Addy's neck so lovingly, and how glad she had been when she realized that she was in Addy's arms. Addy's comment about how great the little one smelled made her grin also. It was always Karen telling Addy how great she smelled and now it was funny to hear Addy use her line on Alex. Of course, Karen's comment on Addy's scent had other connotations, but still it was cute. She also like the way Addy's hips moved going up the stairs.
Addy looked behind her and caught Karen looking. “Watch your step, don't lose your focus.”
“Don't worry about me, I'm well focused. I have a clear picture of what I'm going to focus on in a little while!”
Addy grinned as they reached the upstairs landing. She bent to lay Alex on her bed and to kiss her. Karen came close and laid her hand on Addy's back. Addy whispered in her ear. “I love you little one.” Alex was asleep, but before she snuggled in her pillow, she gave Addy a kiss. Addy snuggled into her and kissed her back. Once Alex was down on the bed, Karen came over and also kissed her good night.
Both women stood by the door looking at their little angel. Karen looked at her adoringly. “She's beautiful.” Addy looked at Karen. “She's you, she looks just like you. God, I can't believe how lucky I am to have two of you.” She traced Karen's face with her hand. Karen closed her eyes enjoying the tender touch. “I love you, green eyes.”
Addy smiled and wondered. “For what, loving you?”
“For that and for her. For loving me, for convincing me to have her, and for always being there. You may not have impregnated me physically, but I wouldn't have gone through any of this if it hadn't been for you. If you hadn't been with me 100% of the way. It was you who got me pregnant, Addy, however weird that sounds. I am certain that she wouldn't be here if it weren't for you. We both owe you. You were right, being a mom has been a wonderful thing. I love the little rascal.”
“I always knew you'd come around. I knew that the minute that little person began to kick inside of you, as frightening as it was….” Addy stopped to laugh remembering when it happened. “I knew you would change your mind about the whole thing. And then I knew that the minute you saw her you would be drooling over her. I always knew you'd love her, Ker. I always did. So, you owe me nothing, baby. The love I see and I feel every day in this house is my reward for all the agony you put me through!” She was making an in your face kind of gesture as she looked towards Karen. Karen nudged her with her elbow. She knew better than to argue against that comment. She knew she had been unbearable during most of the pregnancy.
Addy continued. “Although, I can think of a few ways that an installment plan can take care of any imaginary debt, if you insist on paying …and since you already indicated that you were very focused….”
“Oh! Shut up, woman! Even if I didn't owe, I'd work pro-bono for you and you know it! Haven't I always been delighted to meet the terms of payment?”
Addy smiled. “Yes. That being the case, why don't you step into my office so that you can focus better and we can explore the extent of your philanthropic intentions.” Addy signaled towards the bedroom. Karen came inside smiling.
As they lay in bed after their love making, Karen fell asleep. She had been extremely philanthropic to the point of exhaustion. Addy remained awake thinking about how much her life had changed. She also thought about Karen's words on having become a mother.
Yes, Addy was the one who came up with the idea of having a child. The idea surfaced after the accident when a deer ran in front of her car and as she tried to steer away from it the car skidded on the icy road. She ended up in the freezing waters of Lock Tickton. Had it not been for Karen risking her own life and jumping into the lake to rescue her, the car would have been washed away by the current and she would have faced a sure death.
After the accident, Karen actually told her that she jumped into the lake resolved to save her because she would have died without her. This was not said in jest or as an exaggeration. Karen made such a statement from the depth of her heart and Addy knew that she meant it. Karen had gone as far as saying that if there was an after-life, she wouldn't rest until she found her again, and that if such a thing was ever to happen, Addy should wait for her in some sort of after-life holding area because she was sure to come right behind looking for her. Addy saw how Karen crumpled, and later how she became over protective of her. For the longest time Addy lived in anguish reliving those moments and those comments and thinking what would happen to Karen if she was not around.
Karen's relatives hated her and wouldn't care for her at all. On the contrary, they'd probably take advantage of her vulnerability and shred her to pieces. The truth was that Karen had no one in her life but Addy and that her whole life revolved around her. Addy knew she was healthy and didn't think anything would happen to her, but she couldn't let go of the thought of what would happen to Karen without her? The idea of leaving Karen alone in the world tormented her.
Addy already had children and she had always said that she wouldn't change a second with her time with her children for any career achievement, or anything in the world. Her children had been everything in her life. They both loved her and stayed in touch with her all the time. She wanted that for Karen as well. She thought that the love of a child would fill Karen's life. So, she was willing to go through the whole ordeal of parenthood again for Karen. Addy was resolved. So she began to work on her plan.
After the accident, the subject of children came up several times. She had an early menopause, and could not have any more herself. So they talked about adopting, but adoption was hard and took a long time, years sometimes. On the other hand, Karen could still have children, she had not gone through menopause. So, Addy thought that it was a matter of talking Karen into carrying a baby. She knew it was going to be a tough sale, but she had to try.
Over the course of one of many conversations on the subject, Karen once asked her why she wanted a child, after all she already had two of her own. Karen was outraged when Addy told her the reasons. Just the thought that something would happen to Addy was enough to drive Karen mad. “Fuck, Adriana Marcos, I don't want to hear that nonsense! I don't want to talk about this anymore! You, fucking, infuriate me sometimes!” The only subject that ever infuriated Karen was a picture of the world without Addy. “I don't want you talking about this nonsense. Ever!!! Is that clear?” Addy smiled as she usually did when Karen ranted and did her usual cursing, which she always loved.
When she thought of proposing the idea of the pregnancy Addy was not all worry free. The idea frightened her. Karen was not that young anymore and there would be risks involved. However, her plan included getting the best medical attention, at no matter what cost. She also knew that Karen was not going to be receptive to the idea of becoming pregnant. So this was all going to be a very delicate matter and in the end she wondered if it was a hopeless idea after all.
So, all and all, Karen was never reluctant to the idea of having and raising a child with Addy. It was the matter of how to acquire the child that was the delicate matter, and which as expected crated some friction. Until now their conversation revolved around the subject of adoption. However, it was not until they were exhausted from all their travels after selling the inns that they came back to Scotland and Addy suggested artificial insemination as a way of having a child. Karen was first stunned and then went ballistic. “Are you out of your mind? How much gin did you put in that Martini?”
“Addy, I like kids and would love to have a family. There was a time in my life in my early thirties when I thought that if I found the right person, I would have. But time passed and I got older and the right person never came along. Then when you finally showed up I never mentioned it because you already had kids and I didn't think you'd want anymore. I also already thought myself too old for it. I was just so thrilled with having you in my life that I didn't really care for anything else! Then when we started to talk about kids, I thought we were talking about adopting. I mean if you could have them and wanted to, I'd be behind you 100%. But Addy, in true honesty, I never thought of myself as being pregnant. And to think of it now frightens me shitless!”
Except for not having said ‘fuck' and being somewhat pleasant about it, this was a Karen typical, but more subdued, ranting when presented with a situation which she didn't know how to handle. Addy remembered that time when they were driving and Karen cut three lanes to park on the shoulder of the road to rant about how could she think about not moving in with her after the divorce. Addy smiled the whole time, the ranting was going on. She loved this woman, even when she was yelling at her! Karen's Scottish accent came out loud and clear when she ranted. Addy loved it.
Karen went on and on until she said all she had to say, which was a lot and she was now on empty.
A very patient Addy smiled. “Are you done, blondie?”
Karen narrowed her eyes in an attempt to give a menacing look. “Don't you blondie me now, Ms. Marcos! You are not getting anywhere with me tonight! You've….scared me shitless! I would love for us to have a baby, but me pregnant? How could you even think that I would agree to such a thing?”
Addy got up to leave, but before leaving she made a final statement. “If I could have children, I'd ask you for one of your eggs and would gladly carry your baby, for you. I would have loved to have your child. I think you'd make a great parent.” She walked out leaving a very pensive and troubled Karen behind.
Karen saw Addy going out to the patio, and suspected that this conversation would not end there. Addy walking away in silence only meant that there would be more. The woman did not give up easily. Whenever such a thing happened, Karen would get anxious. She didn't like unfinished business and this had all the signs of being much unfinished.
Addy knew the effect her quiet departure would have on Karen. This was for sure unfinished business, but it wouldn't be Addy who would open the subject for discussion the next time. It would be Karen herself. Addy knew that Karen would be restless because she didn't like lose ends. In Karen's book, matters had to have closure. A firm final, conclusion had to be reached before the subject would be put away and archived. This matter remained very inconclusive. There would be a lot of talk about it.
Weeks passed and the subject still hung over their heads. Although everything was business as usual there were those moments at night when Addy showed signs of worry thinking of what would happen to Karen if something ever happened to her and she was not around anymore. The thought of Karen alone, without someone to love her, gave her such anxiety, that she had to go out to the patio and walk about to calm and hide her worry. She also sometimes cried after they made love thinking of what would be of her loved one if she wasn't there to love her. Addy loved Karen beyond reason and wanted love in Karen's life even if she wasn't there to provide it. A true, genuine love like hers, or like her own child would give her. When Karen saw her in that mood, or heard her cry in bed after they've made love and she wouldn't say why she was crying, Karen immediately knew what the whole thing was about.
They almost never argued, or even disagreed. Whenever they had, Karen felt as if the house had fallen on her. Every nerve in her body was on the edge. Her heart felt torn and in short she could not stand it. She still remembered that time when Addy volunteered for the hot air balloon ride without checking with Karen and Karen put her foot down and didn't let her go through with it. How mad Addy had been at her, with reason of course, but she remembered how awful it was knowing that Addy was mad at her. She simply could not stand not being in good terms with her.
On this particular night, when Karen saw Addy leave for the patio, Karen's heart was torn. Oh God, I've disappointed her, how am I going to fix this? God, what should I do? Please, send me a sign! She's never wrong! Should I go through with this? Karen was at a loss. She went to the living room and sat in the sofa for a while. It was already getting dark outside. She didn't know what to do. After a few minutes, Addy came back inside.
Addy looked a bit unsettled also. This was a very delicate matter and unchartered territory. Getting pregnant is something very personal, for a moment there Addy was thinking that it had to be a self-made decision and that no matter what she said to Karen if Karen didn't feel in her soul that she could or should do it, it was really unfair to put her through it. So, she was having second thoughts, or at least she was concerned about having cornered Karen. After all, wasn't she the one always saying that a child had to be wanted if it was going to be brought into the world? No, if a child was not the product of a loving mutual desire, maybe it was not a good idea.
Addy walked towards the living room and sat next to her. “I've been thinking a lot lately and I think I owe you an apology. I shouldn't have brought up the subject of the insemination. I have no right to ask such a thing no matter the reason. I understand that it's your body and I think that a child needs to be brought into this world to be loved. You cannot love something you don't want. I thought my idea was good. I thought that we have so much love to give, any child would have be lucky to have us as parents. But, don't sweat it Ker, I'm happy with us as we are too.”
She put her arm over Karen's shoulder and kissed her on the forehead. “Good night, baby, I'm going to bed.” As Addy left, Karen thought that this little victory of hers felt as the shallowest victory ever! In fact, Karen felt awful. How does she do this to me?! I feel bad even when I think I'm right! When she went upstairs Addy was already in bed.
Addy went to sleep thinking that she had done all she could to convince Karen, but that it was ultimately Karen who had to make the decision and she respected her choice. Karen lay in bed quite awake that night. She tossed and turned. Addy could feel her restlessness. They had not cuddled and that was unusual. Each had gone to their side of the bed. Addy came over and spooned her. She could feel the vibrations on Karen's body. After a while Karen got up. Nothing like this had happened since that dreadful night when Karen told Addy about what had happened to her mother.
She went downstairs and sat on the sofa in the dark. This had become Karen's spot to deliberate whenever they had any mishaps. These had only happened two or three times, but whenever it had happened, Karen would always be found in the same spot. Addy came to call it the “purging spot.” Karen would always grimace when it was mentioned.
In the still of the night Karen laid back on the sofa and thought: “She loves me. It's not just that she says it. I know she does. I feel it. When she came to me, she left her former life, everything she knew, everything she had to start a new life with me. And then she told me that I am her life, and we began our journey together. Our life is great. She brought me back here, she made this place our home and we have made a life and a fortune here together. We are happy. She is my life, and I adore her. I cannot think of life without her. She's everything to me. She's never asked anything from me until now and to make matters worse what she wants is for me! God! How can I deny her this? How can I say no? For my stupid pride? I never thought of me being pregnant, can I? Will you help me? Is this right? What if something happens to me? What will be of her? She's all I care about. God, show me the way on this one, please?”
Just then Karen heard steps coming down the stairs. Addy didn't know whether to come downstairs or not. She felt bad because she knew why Karen couldn't sleep. She felt guilty for having put this decision on Karen's shoulder.
Addy knew where Karen would be, so she walked straight to the sofa and sat next to her. Addy went right to the point. “Don't think about it anymore, Ker, let it go. Come on, come back to bed. I need my blankie. Come on, I'll give you a massage. The kind you like.” She got close to her and kissed her neck. Karen smiled a bit.
“It's not just that I don't like the idea, Addy, you have good instincts and are usually right about things. The truth is that the idea frightens me. I'm not that young anymore to have a child and we may also be too old to raise a kid, have you thought about that ?
“It frightens me too. There will be risk. I just thought that if we went with the best doctors and the best of everything the risk would be minimized. Also, if things weren't going well, for sure we would opt for your health. I would want to have that very clear from the start. I wouldn't risk you for anything in the world. And about being too old to raise a child, I really don't' think so. We are not in our twenties or thirties but we are pretty young and healthy. I also think we are very mature and can handle whatever comes at us.”
Karen snuggled into her. “I also have other concerns other that my health. I think I would hate to be pregnant and getting all fat and big. And even if all went well, aren't you also afraid that it would change our relationship? It took us so long to be us, I just don't want to risk our intimacy, or life as it is right now. I'm afraid, Addy, I'm really afraid.”
Addy looked at those beautiful green eyes so full of concern and genuine fear and smiled. “Ker, look at me. Look into my eyes and tell me, in true honesty if you think anything in the world could change what you see there, please look and tell me.” Karen was staring at her. No, it was true. Nothing on earth could change what she saw there. Such love, the intensity of her desire, of those feelings burning through her even after four almost five years of being together, no, truly nothing could change what she saw in those eyes. Karen smiled. So did Addy. She knew Karen could see it, and feel it.
“Ker, life would change somewhat for sure. I mean after a while, when the kid is five or six, I wouldn't feel very comfortable making love on the sofa knowing that the kid could come downstairs for a glass of water or something! But I don't think keeping those activities in the bedroom would be much of a problem. That's where we have our ‘discussions' must of the time, anyway.” Addy was always very proper when talking about sex. “Do you see that as a big deal?”
Karen leaned on her as Addy wrapped her arms around her. “If I was to agree to this crazy idea, and I'm not saying that I am, will you be there for me all the time?”
“Ker, have I ever let you down, have I? Life is about trust. You trusted my word when we decided to stay here, and I was here all along. In fact, it was me who opted for staying! I've always been here. I've always stood by you.” Addy sounded a bit edgy there. Karen was silent.
“Yeah, but this is big, this is monumental, this is a lot of responsibility. Bringing someone into the world is a very serious thing, there's a lot of responsibility. I may also get fat and ugly. I've seen that happen to women after they have kids.”
“Ker, we are officially and legally partners. I will adopt the baby as my own, legally and officially from day one. In fact we can have Mr. Kimbell look at all these and have him prepare all the documentation drafted and ready to be filed the very minute the baby becomes viable.”
“You'd do that?”
“Ker, I actually wouldn't have it any other way. We are a family. I would want that child to feel that he or she is as much mine as yours, and most important of all because I love you and I want our baby. And as for you getting fat and ugly, I very much doubt that such a thing could happen. First, because knowing you, you would never allow yourself to gain weight and if you did, you would kill yourself working out after the baby is born to lose it. As for the ugly part, honey, you could never be ugly. There is no possible way that could ever happen.”
Karen had a lump on her throat already. She was such a wimp when it came to Addy. “Oh God, I remember once joking about you getting me pregnant, do you remember it? Years ago?”
“Yes. I do.”
“Will you be there every step of the way from selecting the sperm to the actual insemination, the pregnancy, the birth and the 18 years is going to take to have the kid leave the house?”
Addy chuckled. “Yes, Ker, I will be there every inch of the way. I will actually inseminate you, if the doctor allows me. I also plan to be with you the rest of my life, so yes. I will be there every single day, every step of the way.”
Karen got all teary and buried her face in Addy's shoulder. “I agree to talk about it some more.”
“ Okay, let's then.” Addy replied, this was progressing well and she didn't want to drop the ball. She felt she was on a roll.
“Now? I meant tomorrow or over the course of the next few weeks.”
“Well. It's you who says we are too old for this! If we keep waiting to even talk about it, it may come to be so! We are not getting any younger, you know? If we are going to consider this seriously, I think we should talk about it now.” Addy pressed.
“I know your reasons for wanting the baby. And, I really don't want to hear them again because you know how mad I get when you even bring up the subject. But I do have several subjects requiring discussion. First, this baby would be the product of one of my eggs and some man's sperm, therefore what about disease? I don't want to get some disease from some contaminated sperm donor. Leaving that aside for a minute and going back to the baby, physically, and genetically you will have no contribution in the making of this child.” Here was the logical Karen, sticking her finger in the wound. “So, if your intention is for me to have some of you in this child, how do you see that happening? Moreover, because biologically there would be little of you in that child, why don't we just adopt and that way I don't have to go through, what will most certainly be, a living nine-month hell?”
Addy remained pensive for like two minutes and as if illuminated by some strange force, she knew, she just knew how she was going to blast this one off!! For the win, for the kill she knew how to make so well! Karen Larsen you cannot beat what's coming at you! This was the second time, in their relationship when she absolutely knew she had Karen beat. The first time was when she convinced Karen to stay in Scotland .
Addy smiled. “Sit. I could be a while here.” Karen sat expectantly thinking that there was no possible way that Addy could rebut this factual argument. However, her heart pounded because she knew Addy, and she knew too well that when the woman in front of her wanted to, she could make hell freeze over and she feared that this was about to happen!
“Yes you are right. First, regarding the disease matter, and to get rid of that point immediately, we are going to go to the best place for this, I don't know where this place is, but if it's in Timbuktu , we are going there! I will make sure that we get the adequate referral to this very special, unique and most certainly expensive place. So, there will be no disease or any risks taken in that regard. And I do not care how much all of this would cost. No price would be too high to assure your safety, health, and our peace of mind.” She paused briefly for effect.
“Second, although biologically and genetically I will have no input whatsoever, in the making of the baby, that baby will be my child for two reasons.” Karen was impressed with Addy's organized arguments and logic. “One, this child will be your child.” Addy pointed to her. “A child born of your womb, of your flesh and blood. Just because of that, I will adore it as I adore you. Second, I give you my personal guaranty that I will make sure that our child carries a part of me in him or her. I am going to love that child to its very core, and I am going to make sure that it takes something of me into him or her, so that when you one day, years from now, you hear him or her talk, you'd say ‘that's something Addy would have said or would have done.'” She paused again and looked at Karen straight in the eyes. “So, that child may not look one single bit like me, but I give you my word of honor, my solemn promise that our daughter or son will have some of me in him or her. I also promise you that I will stand by you every inch of the way and that I will be there to raise our child together, not only until he or she leaves our home, but until I have one breath of air left in me. This I promise you.”
As Addy was eloquently speaking she kept moving, pacing back and forth in front of Karen gesticulating with her arms, closing her fists for emphasis and letting her entire body speak loud and clear of what her intentions were. When she was done, she looked at Karen and realized that Karen was sobbing. Addy stopped and knelt in front of her. “Sweetheart, what is it? Why are you crying?”
“Because all of a sudden, I see it.” Karen continued to sob even after Addy hugged her.
“You see what? What do you see?” Addy pulled out of the embrace to read her face.
“I see the child.”
Addy opened her eyes wide. Even she was stunned. Oh God!
“Ker? What do you see? Please, tell me?”
Sobbing, Karen spoke, looking mesmerized into Addy's eyes, as if seeing the image there. “I see a beautiful little girl. She smiles. She has beautiful eyes. Her smile is like a summer day. And she is happy. She feels loved, incredibly loved and when she looks at me, she has an expression in her face…” Karen's eyes moved back and forth as if she was actually seeing the image she was describing. “It's you, it's like… it's like I see your face! Like an expression I've seen in your face! Like when you open your eyes big and raise your eye brows. It's as if she copied your expression. And she speaks in a cute little voice and she says things you'd say.” Karen was soaked in tears.
Addy couldn't comprehend this vision, but wasn't this what she really wanted? Another someone to love Karen just like her? Addy was now almost in tears also, but she couldn't cry now, no, she had to finish this! She hardly believed what was happening! Was this some sort of miracle occurring in front of her?
“Ker? I see her too. And I want her. I want it like I want you. For you, for me, for her! Let's have her, Ker!”
In the midst of her sobbing, her words sounded like the miracle it was. “I want her too.”
“Addy, I don't really know if you comprehend the magnitude of what you ask of me. I am a lesbian who never thought of being pregnant or having a child. What I will do, I will do for love, for my love of you. Because I know you love me.”
“I know, Ker, I know.”
Addy knelt in front of her and placed her head on Karen's legs and sobbed. They embraced and kissed for what could have been hours.
“What if my being pregnant hurts our relationship? I have the feeling that I could be pretty crabby and nasty. I mean, I'll probably hate myself for nine months, can you live with that?”
“The opposite could also be true, you know?”
“Ha! What? That I will love being pregnant?”
Addy chuckled. “I don't think anyone loves being pregnant, Ker. Let's get that clear. I mean, life can be as normal as ever, and you may not be crabby or nasty, but sweet and adorable.”
“Addypooh! You have got to be the most optimistic person in the world!”
“If that is so, then you are very lucky, I mean if you do get all crabby and nasty. I will have my usual smiley face.”
Karen pulled from their embrace and looked at her smiling just a bit. “That I believe to be true.”
Addy grinned. “Then what is there to worry about? I mean I have already survived your ranting, what could be worse?”
“Huh? What if I start blaming you every time I feel sick during the …..you know?”
“I will take all the blame, like a good trooper, but then after the baby is born….just as well, I will take all the credit for all the happiness. How's that?”
“You always win, Adriana Marcos, always!” She again lay her head on Addy's chest and cuddle up with her on the sofa. Addy took a throw on the sofa and cover them both.
“We are both winners here, baby, both of us.” She held Karen tight in her arms and kissed her forehead. “I love you, sweetheart.”
“I definitely love you more.”
The next morning, Addy woke up first. This was unusual. Karen stirred in her sleep when Addy kissed her. “Gorgeous, do you want breakfast in bed?”
Karen chuckled, this most of the time played the other way around. “Um hum! What are you going to make?”
“Whatever you want, but you have to promise me that you won't get up. I have some after breakfast activities planned. Pregnancy requires a lot of trials, you know!”
Karen smiled, as she stretched on the bed. “I need to go to the bathroom.”
“Go, but then back to bed.”
“Yes ma'am. Your sex slave will be right here waiting.”
Addy smiled and took off for the kitchen.
She took forever, so Karen started to wonder. “Addy?!!!”
From downstairs, Addy yelled. “Yeah? I'm still working on your culinary treat!”
“Okay!” Karen yelled from upstairs.
Addy prepared a cheese omelet and buttered toasts, juice and coffee. She brought everything on a serving tray and placed it on the bed. Karen sat up.
“I'm sorry it took me so long. You never take this long when you do this.”
Karen looked at the food and chuckled. “Addy that's because I only bring you coffee and muffins or toasts, but look at you an omelet, bacon, toast! Geez, and I'm not even pregnant yet?” Oh God! What am I saying!
They ate and when they finished, Addy removed the tray from the bed and then her robe, as Karen watched her. Karen removed the covers and Addy came forward on top of her. “You are mesmerizingly beautiful, Adriana Marcos.”
Addy smiled enchanted by the green eyes staring at her. “Luckily for you, green eyes, I'm also your love slave.”
Karen nearly choked on a piece of toast she was still chewing.
“So, how may I please you today, master?”
Karen chuckled. “You are too much. I give up! Have me, and hurry, I'm craving you!”
“Let's see how much.”
To be continued in Part 2
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