Disclaimers: See Part 1
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They finished an early dinner in the patio and were clearing up things to have dessert. Lately they were eating earlier because whenever they'd eaten late and gone to bed later, Karen had suffered from heartburn. So Addy decided that it was better to eat earlier and if the weather was good they could take a walk along the rolling hills. It was already September and the leaves were beginning to turn.
For desert, Addy had French pastries and chocolate ice cream.
When Karen saw all the goodies that Addy brought out she couldn't believe it. “Adriana, what are you doing to me?! Why are you buying all this stuff? I'm not going to fit through the doors if you continue to buy all these things!”
Addy smiled. “Well, you don't have to eat them. As a matter of fact I bought these goodies for me. You may have some if you'd like, but you certainly don't have to. I only have a little bit of each to satisfy my taste buds and not crave them later.”
Karen gave her a mocking look and then smiled. “Give me just as much as you are having and not a sliver more.”
Addy did as requested.
The minute Karen stuck a fork in her mouth she was in awe. “Oh my God! This is so good!”
Addy smiled. Just a sliver, huh? We'll see about that!
Addy knew that Karen was reluctant to eat for fear of gaining weight. She was mindful to be cooking all the right meals to provide Karen with all the nutrition she needed. There were always green vegetables for dinner, and elaborate salads sometimes containing fruits, nuts and berries. She knew that Karen was not much into fruits so she'd throw them in here and there.
Sometimes Karen would wonder about ‘things' she found in her food. “What is this yellow thing in the salad?”
“Mango? Since when is mango salad material?”
Then Addy would have all sorts of justifications. “Oh, come on Ker! If you read some gourmet magazines, you would know that apples, mangos and pineapple and so many other fruits and berries have become integral ingredients of current culinary trends. Nuts also, they are in all salads.” Addy sounded so authoritative and knowledgeable that she was actually convincing and since Karen didn't have a clue about current culinary trends and the salads tasted great, she immediately dropped the subject. She'd examine any unknown ingredient in the salad, but would end up eating it without any further comment. Addy sometimes had to look away so as not to laugh when she saw Karen doing her inspections. The same happened when Addy introduced lentils.
“What is this brown thing?”
“Why are we having lentils? We've never had them before at home. I think I've had them at Indian restaurant.” She tasted it and liked it. “Umm it's good!”
Addy made awesome lentils. “Well, I'm not from India , but when I was a kid, I really liked them and the other day I saw them at the store and decided to give them a try.”
“They are very tasty.”
“Here, dip the bread in it.”
“Umm, I like it.”
Only after Addy was sure that Karen liked them, she'd say “and they are very rich in iron which is very good for you and the baby.”
As of lately, Karen had noticed the introduction of items of food they had never had before. Everything was always introduced with a remark, or explanation. “Would you look at the size of that squash? I couldn't resist buying it,” or “I thought that was the greenest spinach I've ever seen,” or “I hadn't seen oranges like that since I left Spain .” Then she'd peel the oranges and cut them in little wedges and arrange them with some strawberries in a small plate to make some sort of design and make it look appealing. Karen knew that all of it had to do with nutrition for her and the baby. She continued to eat and smile. She liked that Addy was so mindful of her health and the baby's and that she went out of her way to make things tasty and appealing.
With the desserts, Addy always made sure that anything Karen ate had milk in it. Milk has calcium and it was good for the baby. The French pastries, well that was a bit indulgent and for that matter they had very little of them.
When they were clearing the kitchen after dinner, Karen stood next to her as they were putting the dishes in the dishwasher. “Don't think for a minute that you are fooling me, Ms. Addy, with all the apples and mangos in the salads and the lentils and the greens….I know what you are doing.”
Addy gave her the loving smile. “What am I doing?”
“You are feeding me nutritious stuff!” Karen grimaced.
“Shame on me! What an awful person I am! Imagine that? Feeding my big baby nutritious food.” She gave Karen a kiss on her cheek and went off to put things away in the refrigerator. She often did that. Kiss her and continue to do whatever she was doing. Karen called it ‘the kiss and ride.' A lot of times, Karen would grab her arm and reel her back, but sometimes it caught Karen by complete surprise. Karen loved being the object of Addy's affection. It was so wonderful that when Addy passed by her or sat next to her and didn't show any emotion, Karen procured it, she needed it.
Karen blushed. She turned around and leaned against the kitchen counter. Addy was on her way back from the refrigerator with a smirk on her face. She got close to Karen and leaned into her placing her hands on Karen's abdomen, but still holding her gaze. “Any more complaints?” Addy had a daring look.
Karen swallowed as she smiled. Addy could see Karen's breathing become agitated, and the green eyes searching her face with excitement. Even after all the time they had already been together, the woman could melt her with a wink and set her engine running in an instant. Lord have mercy!
She managed to barely whisper some words. “No, no complaint.”
Addy's smile broadened as she brought her hands to Karen's face and held it. “Good, because I only want the best for my babies.” She kissed her on the lips. As she was turning away, Karen held her hand and turned her around so she could face her. She wrapped hers arms around her waist. Addy leaned in and pressed her right thigh between Karen's and they kissed. The kiss gradually intensified.
Addy pulled out. “Ker, these activities might affect digestion, just now, let's….Oh God!” Karen already had her hand inside Addy's pants and on her buttocks.
“A good work out is good for digestion. So, do you want it here, or upstairs?” Karen kissed her as she pushed Addy's buttocks closer to her.
“Umm! It's always more comfy upstairs.”
They made their way up wrapped in each other's arms, and sat on the bed while kissing. Addy, removed Karen's shirt and laid down pulling Karen down with her. “Come here sexy.” When Addy spoke, Karen became paralyzed. Her eyes opened wide, as if she had seen a ghost.
“What? What's wrong?”
“It moved!” Karen sat up holding her belly in panic.
“The baby? It's moving?”
“Oh, God! It moved again!” Karen gasped. “Oh! There it is again! It's like having a fish inside me!”
“Here, let me feel it.” Addy placed her hand on Karen's belly while looking at a very terrified Karen. Addy's smile made Karen smile as well. Addy kissed her. “It's okay, honey, it's okay.”
Then Addy leaned down and began to talk to Karen's belly. “Hi little one…”
The baby moved. Karen was transfixed looking at the scene and feeling the little fish, as she called it, move inside of her.
“Oh, my God, Addy! The fish is moving! I'm scared!”
Addy chuckled. “Why? I think it's fantastic. It's a miracle, Karen. It's the miracle of life.” The baby moved again.
“I think it moves every time you talk. Don't talk! And you are right! The fact that I find myself in this situation is nothing but a miracle because the Lord knows this wouldn't have happened without divine intervention!! ”
Addy laughed. “Well that is also true, but I think it's great that the baby is moving. That means it's well.”
The baby kept moving. Karen looked at her. “Stop talking. Every time you talk it moves!”
Addy laughed and kissed her, coming on to her. “Don't even think about it! I can't make love right now with this thing moving inside me.”
Addy laughed. “This is a first! Karen Larsen saying no to a night of passion!”
“Addy, I'm serious, this feels very weird!”
“I know, babe, I'm only kidding. Come here, let me hold you.”
They cuddled, but didn't fall asleep right away. Addy was all smiles as she caressed Karen's back with long strokes reaching down to her outer thigh and buttocks. Karen closed her eyes basking on the sensual strokes and enjoying the tenderness. She was frightened, Addy could tell. These were new feelings and sensations inside her. She was holding on to the only thing that offered comfort.
Karen relaxed as Addy gently stroked the tension away. “All is fine, baby, and all will be fine. I love you.” Karen buried her face further into the crook of Addy's neck and cried. “Baby, what's wrong? Why the crying? All is well.” Addy looked for her lips and found them. Karen's mouth opened and welcomed her. A million little kisses were exchanged, as the gentle caressing continued. “Sleep, baby, sleep. Everything is going to be alright. You'll see.” Then Addy began what became a tradition for the next few months. She began to talk Karen to sleep. All the talk being about the baby, as she ever so gently continued her caressing. “This baby will be beautiful. If it's girl…”
Every single night there were descriptions of the little one in boy or girl version, questions as to how he or she would look or be in character, since the possibilities were endless so were the talks. Karen got so into it and enjoyed Addy's scenarios and possibilities, and every night she dozed off the same way. Some nights the talks were interrupted. Pregnancy and all, Karen's sex drive had not diminished, so at least, in that department it was business as usual.
Right around the fifth month, Karen decided to tackle the issue that was bothering her. Karen was the type of person that had to have all the possibilities covered. She didn't like leaving things to chance.
In the living room, one evening, she brought up the issue. “Addy, we need to talk”
Addy pursed her lips and smiled. “Shoot! What are we talking about?”
“We need to talk about what to do in the event something goes wrong.”
“Oh, my God, Karen!! I thought we had discussed everything and that this subject was closed. What is it now? Nothing will go wrong! Why do you do this all the time? Why do you have to be negative about things? This kills me, you know? I like to think positive. ”
“Addy, I also like thinking positive, but we also have to be realistic. Things can happen and, even if you don't want to talk about it, for my peace of mind, would you, please listen to me? Is this too much to ask?”
Addy silently agreed that it wasn't. After all, she had asked Karen to go through this and she had promised herself that she would take whatever Karen threw at her. So this was part of the deal.
“All right. Speak your mind, if you must.”
“I've gone over all the papers with Mr. Kimbell. Everything is in order. If the child survives…”
Addy rolled her eyes. “Oh, God, Ker!”
“Hear me out! If the child survives, you do whatever you want to in terms of staying here or going back to the US . I'd much rather if you went back because that way you wouldn't be alone and you would have the help of your kids raising the baby. As you are my legal spouse, this property belongs to you as long as you live here, and it belongs, by birth right to the child if she is a girl. There is no need for you to stay. There's plenty of money in the bank to raise the kid.” Karen continued. “The adoption papers are in order also. Once the baby is born he or she becomes your adopted child. I know you will keep him or her so I will not go into that. As for my last wish, well you know that I'd rather have no life if I'm to be a vegetable, so I'm going to ask you, please, to pull the plug as a personal favor. Also, if it's a matter of deciding between me and the child, I will let you decide that one and, if you choose me, I promise never to mention it. I'd understand. And if you choose the baby, well love him or her as you've loved me. That is all I ask.”
Addy's face was flushed. Hearing Karen speak had risen in her a thousand emotions, from madness to fear, to panic to anger, she had gone through every possible human emotion in a matter of the ten minutes it took Karen to speak her mind. She was breathing fast and her face was somber and flushed almost showing a mixture of anger and anguish and a terrible need to cry.
“Are you done?” Her voice quivered.
“Yes. Are you okay?”
Karen looked at her expectantly. Addy said nothing, she got up, opened the door and walked out into the patio and continued to walk down the rolling hills all the way to the distant tree where they had so many important conversations. Karen watched her go. She knew that Addy needed alone time now to gather herself.
Walking towards the ‘thinking tree,' as it came to be called because of the many thoughts that had been shared under it, she thought a million thoughts. She thought about her life before Karen and her children and her family and about how her life with Luke turned out. She also thought about the twist and turns life had thrown at her after she met Karen. How different things were now. Then she cried. She cried for many reasons, the past , the present and the future.
She sat on the ‘talking bench' under the ‘thinking tree.' She imagined what it would have been like to have raised her own children with someone like Karen. With the love they shared. How much easier life would have been, knowing that she had her partner's constant support. Something she never felt with Luke. Luke was always reluctant to help, as if he was doing her a favor. She had never felt that they had carried the burden of the family equally. It was always Addy giving it all while he would just throw crumbs. She thought about how her children would have turned out. As things were they turned out to be great, but she couldn't help thinking that with Karen things would have been so much different. She wondered why she didn't divorce Luke before, but what would have happened to the children? He might have wanted to keep them. No, she dis well waiting until the kids were adults. She was happy with her decision. It was the kid who kept the marriage.
All of a sudden she felt an immense peace. Her strength was coming back to her. As she reminisced of her life, she realized how full and what a gift it had always been. Yes, she had lived a full plentiful life and it seemed that God gave her more and more by the minute. She thought of what good deed could she had possibly ever done to receive such a bountiful life. She loved and she was loved . What more could she ask for? Then she looked back towards the cottage and saw her. Karen was walking over to where she was. Addy looked at her lovingly as she approached her. Her heart began to beat faster the closer the woman got. Karen was her life. She loved her. She filled her in so many ways that it was beyond description. An unimaginable, unconditional, indescribable intense, yet gentle love. Addy smiled. I love her . I'm so in love I don't know how to love her more! In her head she swore she could hear a voice. A gentle voice telling her that everything would be fine. That they would have a beautiful baby girl and that the child would be raised with immense love.
When Karen came close she sat next to Addy on the bench. “I'm sorry. I know you don't like to talk about those things. I feel the same, but I had to.”
Addy smiled. She pulled her close and kissed her with a passion that startled Karen. She didn't expect this kind of reception. She came to apologize thinking that she had hurt Addy's with her morbid talk and yet she was received with this unexpected fabulous kiss full of passion and want. The kiss was of such magnitude that it made Karen tremble. She had goose bumps.
“Addy, Addy…what? You confuse me all the time! I thought you were mad at me and you kiss me like this…what happened? What is it love, do I need to apologize? Have I hurt you? I'm so sorry, Addy….I don't want to make you sad. I just need to say what's on my mind. I need to share it with you, good or bad. ”
Addy chuckled. “Ssssh, Ker, say no more. I can always think clearer under this tree. I look at the ocean and I lose myself. It's so infinite.” She turned around to face Karen and she spoke. “It's like when I look into your eyes. I loose myself in them and I love it.” Karen smiled and her eyes misted.
“It is I who should apologize. I've asked you to share everything with me and yet when you do, I act like a spoiled child and walk out! I'm sorry. I just have a hard time with negative thoughts. I can't stand the idea of anything happening to you, I know you understand because you feel the same way about me.” She took Karen's face in her hands and kissed her frantically. “Ker, I don't know many things, I wish I knew more! But what I'm going to tell you now I do know. I don't know how I know, but I do know this.” Addy was the reflection of peace and sincerity. Karen looked at her in awe and listened with a loving smile that got bigger with every word she heard.
“I know that I love you.” She closed her eyes and opened them. “Infinitely. I know that I love our child.” Karen had a huge smile on her face and her eyes were very watery. “I know that everything will be well, and I know that you and I are going to raise a beautiful and most wonderful child in a home full of love and understanding. You might think I'm crazy, and that this in another of my many other crazy ideas, or visions, but I know this is as true and as real as this tree and as that ocean we see in the distance. I just know, Ker, I really do, and you must believe me.”
Karen pulled away from Addy's arms a bit. “I believe you. I don't know why I would believe such a crazy, out-of-the-blue statement, but I believe you, Adriana.” Karen loved to call her by her full name. She caressed Addy's face with the back of her hand. Addy closed her eyes to enjoy the tender touch. When Addy closed her eyes, Karen came forward and kissed her. “I also know that our baby is a girl.”
Karen laughed. “Now that is crazy!”
Addy continued with her statements. “Let's bet on it. Double or nothing!”
Karen chuckled. “Addy….the last time I made a bet like that I lost!”
“Yes, and you paid well. Think you can pay as well?”
“You are on! Double it is!”
“Good, I'm so sure of my win that I've come up with a name an all for our girl. What do you think about Alexandra, Alex for short.”
Karen smiled. “I like it.”
“You do? No counter offer? No complaint or issue?”
“Nope. Alexandra it is!” As she said this she got up and pulled Addy up as well.
“I can't believe that you are not going to put up a fight for the name thing?”
“Nope. This baby is my gift to you, so you can name it.” Karen was constantly involving her in the baby matter. She wanted to make sure that Addy felt part of the deal, that she was in it 100%. Addy smiled thinking that she was getting all these privileges, which in Karen's mind was probably part of a plan to get her to feel responsible for the baby when, in fact, there was nothing she wanted more than to actually be a part of this child's life.
They had many conversations regarding the baby over the course of the next few months, after all this was going to mean a great change in their lives. And, as they both agreed, unchartered territory. One evening as they sat in the living room to watch a movie, Karen was pensive.
“You know, Addy there is something we overlooked, when starting this.” She pointed to her belly.
“Well, I know we've talked about raising a child not being an easy thing. But I think raising this child is going to be a lot more difficult than any other.”
“Well, this child is going to have two Mommies.”
Addy looked at her seriously.
“You didn't think about that, did you smarty pants!?”
“No. I did not. I just didn't think it would matter.”
“It does not matter to us, our friends and family, nor will it matter to ‘it' until one day. When he or she realizes that other kids have a mom and a dad and he or she has two moms and no dad. Then what?”
Addy was pondering. “We have a few years to do research as to how other parents in the same situation have dealt with the issue.”
“Yes, we do. I wonder how much there is out there in terms of research material, though. Gays and Lesbians adopting and having their own children is a pretty recent happening, I mean in the whole scheme of things.”
“We'll buy every book out there, attend classes if necessary. Karen, this child will be brought up in an environment of love, and although I recognize that children can be cruel and that the world out there is hard, we are going to have to raise this little one to be tough. A self-confident person who will not be afraid of being who she is.”
“What if our child is one day ashamed of us because of the prejudice he or she finds out there?”
“Ker, I wish I could give you a definite answer for that question. Unfortunately, I can't. All we can do is raise her with love and teach her well. If we raise the child I hope to raise, she will live up to the challenge. That much I know. This baby…” She touched Karen's belly. “…will be an exceptional child. I just know it. Don't ask me why I know, but I know it. Just like I knew that this cottage would be a home, and that the inn would be a success and later the other inns and now the distillery. I just have this great feeling about this baby. Ker, she is your child and mine. She will have our love, our drive, our wits, our spirit. She will be you and I combined! She will be us! Ker, I believe that someone who is the product of our love will be an exceptional, loving human being. She will be a beautiful person.”
Karen looked thrilled with the idea that there could be someone who actually combined the two of them into one being. “You keep thinking it's a girl. Do you know something I don't? Did Tiffany say anything to you?” Karen was making faces of outrage, as if she had been left out of such vital information.
“No! Ker, Tiffany didn't say anything. I just know. I feel it.”
“Sometimes, I'm frightened, Addy. Not just because I have this person inside of me and I don't want to think which way it's coming out, but also because we are entering unchartered territory. I mean, I know you had your kids, but this…” she pointed to the two of them, “is different.”
“Ker, we can and we will do it. We will be successful like every other thing we've ever started. I promise you that I will research the issue and come the day, if there's got to be a talk with the little one, I will be ready to tackle it. That I promise you, as well.”
Karen smiled. She liked Addy's resolve and her commitment to the project, as they called it. Addy was always up to the task and she never disappointed.
During the nine months of pregnancy, Addy literally lived at Karen's beckoning. Addy took care of the most minimum details to make Karen's pregnancy as comfortable as possible. There were massages every night, a lot of breakfasts in bed, she'd cook all of Karen's favorite dishes. She'd go and buy whatever Karen wanted. They went shopping for baby items. They got ideas on what to do with the nursery and contacted Sandy to help them decorate. The shopping and the nursery preparations were mainly Addy's idea. Karen's interest was only sparked by Addy's interest and comments. She thought that Addy was making too much of it. She was of the opinion that all the baby needed was a safe crib.
At night, Addy would sing to her belly, she would help her take hers shoes on and off and help her to take showers and reach all unreachable places. Karen was delighted with all the attention she was getting. It was not that she didn't get attention before. It was just that now everything was exaggerated and Karen loved it.
A lot of time was spent trying to make Karen feel good about the change in her figure. This was not difficult for Addy. In her eyes, Karen was drop dead gorgeous. The most beautiful woman on earth and there was no way that Karen would ever look bad. However, Karen did not share Addy's view of herself. Karen thought she looked awful. She thought she was fat and swollen and just hated it.
This was still the middle of the term. Addy didn't even want to think of the last months, which is when the baby really grows. Addy, made sure to pay homage to Karen's body every single day in one way or another. They didn't stop fooling around until Karen's breasts were too full towards the end, and that was only because Karen didn't want Addy to see her or touch her. “Are they ever going to go back to normal?”
“Yes, they will!
Addy never knew how to determine the most appropriate moment to say anything about the pregnancy, in the beginning there appeared to not be any good moments. However, some matters required thoughts and they had to be discussed. There was no way around this one. It had to be tackled because Addy knew that Karen had not thought about it. Addy had to go head on against the incoming train.
“By the way, I know that you've been reading and all, so I'm sure you've read about this, but have you thought about whether you are going to breast feed?” Hell had no fury! If looks could kill, Addy would have been dead on the spot.
“You have got to be kidding me! Don't even think about it Adriana because I have to draw the line somewhere and this is where I'm drawing it and I don't want to hear speeches about the baby will be healthier and how not breast feeding would impair this or that!! As far as I'm concerned this little brat should be thankful that she's being born and I really don't give a dam if she has whatever impairment the books say she can have, no little brat is going to be sucking on me as if I was some cow, no way! And that's that!!! And I don't want to hear a word about this!!!”
“I guess that's a no?”
Karen narrowed her eyes and looked at her in a menacing way.
Addy bit her lower lip trying to restrain her laughter. She now had a contrite look.
Now Karen was feeling bad. She felt she had been too unnecessarily harsh. However, she was convinced that sometimes with Addy she had to put her foot down and preempt because if she would let Addy start talking she knew she would be doomed and doing whatever Addy wanted.
On this subject, she was resolved not to let Addy have her way. “Addy, I want to get back to normality as soon as possible. I can't stand being pregnant anymore….” She started to cry. The hormones were all over the place at this time of the pregnancy. “And I don't think I can stand the little thing on my breast!” She was all tears now. “I know that this decision may be some sort of sin in ‘the mother' book, but I can't, I really can't.” The crying increased.
“Oh, baby, you don't have to, I didn't mean to say that you had to! I didn't breastfeed either, I couldn't even when they said it was better for the baby. It was not in my nature and I didn't. I don't think it made a difference to either Joey or Laurie, so don't feel bad for not wanting to do it. On the positive side…” Addy now had that mischievous look on her face when she looked at Karen. “Although I've read that breastfeeding enlarges them. That sounds like a plus. Don't you think so?”
Karen looked worried. “What? You don't like them now?” Again tears falling from the green eyes. “You are not happy with them?”
Addy chuckled. “Ker, I'm just teasing you!”
“Good, because I'm not going through that only for them to get bigger! I'm going to take a shower and go to bed.”
Addy followed her. “Want help?”
“No, I don't want you to see me looking like a cow!”
“Ker, you sleep naked. I see you every night! Let me at least help you take your pants off.” Addy was outside the bathroom door and she could hear Karen struggling with her pants. All of a sudden the door opened. They looked at each other and Addy came in and kissed her. Karen attempted to say something, but Addy wouldn't let her.
“Ssshh! Don't say anything.” She put her fingers to Karen's mouth and then kissed her tenderly on the cheek.
Addy helped her undress, and Karen got in the shower. She could hear Karen sobbing. A minute later, Addy opened the door to the shower and entered. “Come here.” Karen turned around and was immediately wrapped in warm loving arms. Addy took the scrungie and among a thousand kisses, gently ran it through every bit of her enlarged body.
“I'm sorry. I know I'm being impossible, but I want this to be over, Addy. I….”
“Ssssh! I love you.” Again, a million little kisses were imparted all over Karen's back as her lower back and other parts below were being rubbed with the scrungie. “You can never be anything but beautiful, baby. I adore you, baby or no baby.” Addy continued to kiss her back. Karen turned around and they hugged. Addy continued her gentle scrubbing and kissing. She looked at Karen's breasts and smiled. “No need to breastfeed. I like them as they are.” Karen chuckled, as Addy, very delicately and slowly, ran the scrungie over very sensitive parts.
When they were done, Addy came out first dried herself and then Karen. Not a word was said. Addy was enjoying the comfort she was providing and Karen was enjoying the comfort given.
Addy smiled. “It's a pleasure, my beautiful! There you are all dried already. I think I'm spoiling you.”
“I like being spoiled.”
Addy caressed her face and kissed her. “I know.” They shared a long kiss. “Go to bed. Do you want something from the kitchen? I have to get some water.”
“No, just wake me up when this is over!”
Karen went to bed and covered her head.
When Addy came back. She came over and kissed her. “Do you want a rub?”
“No. Why do you insist on seeing my hideous body?”
“Ker! It's not hideous! You look beautiful! When are you going to get it through your head that you are the most gorgeous woman in the world?”
Karen got all teary again. Anything made her an emotional wreck. Addy rubbed her back and her buttocks, and kissed her everywhere except in certain areas which were overly sensitive.
Karen was pouting. “You are really the only baby I want messing with my breasts.”
Addy smiled. “Ssshhh, I know, but we don't want baby to hear this conversation. Don't want her coming to his world already jealous of her other mom! No, Ker, I think the baby doesn't have to breastfeed in order to be fine, I didn't breastfeed. As to the getting bigger part, I'm perfectly happy with how they are and if the sucking helps, I think I can take care of. . . .”
“Sssssh! watch your language….the baby is listening!” Karen chuckled. I'd rather if you take care of them. I'm already used to you. I don't think I can handle anyone else messing around in that department.”
Addy nuzzled her neck and smiled. “Good. I like exclusivity. I'm very territorial, you know?”
“So can I kiss them?”
It was already the end of November and the weather was turning. On that particular night the howling wind and rain woke Addy up. Karen noticed that Addy got up. “What is it, baby?”
“Nothing, the noise of the wind woke me up.” As Addy looked out the window, she had a horrifying thought. What if the baby decided to come on a night like this or worse when there was a snowstorm and the roads were covered? She panicked. Her mind ran with the fear. She remembered the night Sarah's son got sick and the struggle to get to the hospital on that winter night. It would also take them an hour to get to Edinburgh from Altee. They had to go to Edinburgh because there were better medical facilities there and because Tiffany was there. The baby was also due to be born in March and the weather was still usually bad that time of the year. She had to plan for a worst case scenario. She often did that because she believed that when people were caught unprepared, it was very difficult, if not impossible, to come up with the best solution. It was best to think of the worst situations with a clear mind and then draw a perfect plan.
A few days later, out of the blue, a typical Addy decision was made. Karen was already used to ideas coming out of what appeared to be out of the blue. With the years, though, she had come to realize that what appeared as out of the blue, was not necessarily so. Addy would ponder things a million times in her head before she would blurt everything out. Of course, because she would think about things for so long, when the idea finally made it out into the open it was not just an idea, it was a full blown plan. This was an example.
“Karen, I've contacted a realtor in Edinburgh .”
Karen looked at her in total surprise waiting to see what was coming. It had been several months since Addy had any wild ideas, in fact the last wild idea - the baby- was still in process.
Addy continued. ”I've asked her to look for a place to rent near the hospital. We are spending the winter there. I have been thinking for a while that we are too far from the hospital and the weather may be bad. I'm not taking any chances and I'd appreciate it if you went along with this plan, for my peace of mind. I need to know that I can get you to the hospital and that all will be fine.”
Karen shrugged. “Fine with me. I'm also agreeable to taking the kid out by c-section. Anything to get this nightmare over with!”
“Thank you, hun, you have no idea how relieved I am that you are okay with this. I don't know about the c-section. I guess we would need to discuss that with Tiffany and then decide.”
“Why wouldn't I agree to the apartment?”
Addy shrugged, turned around and rolled her eyes. Only because you've been bitching around everything lately?
As far as their daily life, everything was going normally. Karen was feeling great, had not gained much weight and her work with Phillip kept her busy during the week. They always had an outing planned for the weekend and enjoyed many of the fall festivities in town and nearby locations.
In December Karen was already in her sixth month and preparations began for Christmas. They weren't going anywhere, not in this advanced stage of the pregnancy. Karen was not in the mood for partying and they agreed to have a quiet Christmas at home.
They had become friends with another Lesbian couple through JP. The couple owned a small restaurant in a nearby town and JP had stopped there once to try their baked goods. They were excellent cooks, well, Sylvia was the cook, Anne was more of the business head. When the inn was operational they had frequented each other's restaurants and had sent clients to each other. Even though the inn was now gone Karen and Addy remained friends with them and they occasionally visited each other or met for dinner once in a while. On this particular occasion, Silvia had called to invite them to a Christmas party.
“What should I tell Sylvia about Saturday?”
“Yeah, we can go for a little bit.”
When they got to Sylvia's and Anne's there was a crowd of people. Some were friends from the town. Others were business acquaintances and a few neighbors. Neither Karen nor Addy knew most of them. Sylvia was going out of her way to accommodate Karen and make her comfortable. Addy stayed close to her, she knew Karen was very sensitive these days due to her hormones being all over the place. She was also very self-conscious about the changes in her body and was already nearing the stage when she just wanted everything to be over.
They were shocked when the saw Anne with no other Alana. “Karen, Addy, this is Alana Dickerson and her friend Jessica.
Jessica looked to be, at least, ten years younger than Alana.
“Hi, Addy, hi Karen, it's been a while.” Alana kept looking at Karen's belly unbelieving what she was seeing. For Addy it was very awkward and she almost wished the ground would crack open underneath her and swallow her to the ends of the earth. She regretted having come. She knew Karen hated Alana and that she was mortified that Alana saw her in her current condition. Karen had on her poker face and Addy knew it. She had to resolve this situation as soon as possible before something or someone exploded.
“Oh, you know each other?”
“Yes, we do. We have mutual friends.” Karen replied.
No matter how much Karen's belly caught her attention, Karen couldn't help notice that Alana couldn't keep her eyes off Addy. As usual, the woman had no shame. Addy was very aware of Alana's intensive stare, even though she had focused her attention to Anne who was still talking to her. Addy's mind raced trying to figure out a way to get out of this situation.
“So, Karen, you are expecting.”
“Yes, soon.” Karen was short on words. It was obvious that she did not want to talk to this woman.
“I guess congratulations are in order.” To Karen's relief the other woman, Jessica, pulled Alana away to try some new dish.
“Ker, I want to leave as soon as possible. I don't want to deal with you know who.”
“Agreed. I think I'm going to combust, if I don't get out of here quick. Addy, I can't stand her! Just tell Anne that I don't feel well and that I want to go home. It's not far from the truth. I do want to go home.”
“Consider it done.”
Addy went off to look for Anne. Alana, who had not taken her eyes off Addy, immediately followed her.
Addy turned. Shit!
“What a great surprise to find you here, and most of all, what a shocker to see Karen pregnant. Did she lay that on you, or did you see it coming?”
“I beg your pardon?!”
“Oh, come on, Addy! Don't tell me that this pregnancy thing was your idea! You already have kids. I'm sure this is not the kind of thing you were looking for at this stage in your life. Listen, I'm having a party at my place in Glasgow . Tell Karen that you have some business there and stay with me. We can have some time to ourselves. I'll make it worth your while. You know how I feel about you.”
Addy couldn't believe her ears. Was this woman crazy? Did she really think that she would ever leave Karen? She just didn't get it. Addy was furious. A mad Addy was not a good thing! Whenever her cage was rattled she became Mr. Hyde!
Because they were in a crowd of people and in someone else's house, Addy opted for civility. Although she really wanted to punch this woman in the face! “Alana, I'm sorry. I think we've gone over this before. I don't share your feelings. I'm in love with my partner and we are expecting a child that we both want. I am not interested in any of your offers. Now if you'll excuse me, I would like return to my partner.”
“Addy, don't be a fool. Do you know how many women wished to hear an offer like that? Do you know what you are missing?”
“Alana, I cannot miss what I don't want. Perhaps you should concentrate on those women and leave me alone.” She walked away. On her way back, she came across Anne. She explained that Karen was not feeling too well and that they would be leaving soon, and then she walked towards Karen.
A very vigilant and mad Karen had seen the whole exchange with Alana from a distance.
“Ready to go home, Blondie?”
“Yes.” AS Addy helped her up, Karen whispered in her ear. “I love you.”
Addy smiled knowing what that statement was about. She knew that Karen was aware of what had just happened. While talking to Alana, she sensed the green eyes on her the whole time. What a great feeling it was to be wanted by the person you loved. “I love you too, sweetheart.” She kissed her on the lips.
Karen was delighted. Eat your heart out Alana, wherever you are watching from! This baby is all mine!
On the way back, they were quiet. Karen was waiting for Addy to tell her what happened back at Sylvia's. Addy hesitated because she didn't want to upset Karen, but there was nothing to be upset about, and she didn't' like to keep things from Karen.
“You know how we agreed to always have full disclosure about anything happening that the other wouldn't know unless we told?”
“Um huh.” Karen was smiling. She knew Addy would tell.
“Alana, came on to me again.”
“I hate that bitch! I suspected she would. She didn't even respect the fact that we are expecting a child! Bitch! She was ogling you since the minute she saw you and then she went after you the minute you got up.”
“You saw it all, huh? Are you mad?”
“I'm not mad. I was not happy thinking that someone was trying to score on my turf, but I trust you. The truth is that we cannot control the world. Things will happen. It's how we respond to things happening that make a difference. Sure, I think she's a despicable bitch, but I trust you. I know you too well. And I know you are not offended by my saying so. You are here because you want to, and so am I. That's what matters.”
“Thanks. You are right about me. You know, Ker, this is what's wrong with the world. There is no respect. Everyone thinks they can mess around with anyone! People don't respect family or anything. Some people just don't have any values, or integrity. They just can't understand the value of family and relationships.”
“True, but you know why that kind of thing happens? Because there are those in relationships who play the game hoping that they won't get caught. Like Mary and her double dipping. They always get caught, though. Lies are hard to keep up with and eventually they are caught in their own web. I'm sure that's what happened to Carol and Mary. Carol stood by her long enough to figure out all her tricks. But then again, if those in relationships fall so easy, maybe the relationship wasn't so strong to begin with. Maybe there was something already wrong.”
“Yeah, that's true.”
Karen smiled. “What did she say?”
Addy didn't want to upset Karen. “Karen, please, don't ask me to come so low as to repeat her words!”
Karen chuckled. “She picked the wrong person to mess with.”
“She took a plunge in the wrong pool for sure!”
Karen laughed and looked at her lovingly. “Can I take a dip in your pool tonight?” Addy blushed. “Tonight and any night, sweetie,”
“I will say one thing though. The bitch has good taste!”
Back at home, they were getting ready to go to bed. Addy helped Karen take off her pants and shoes and then helped her get under the covers. Even such trivial things were already difficult at this stage of the pregnancy. Addy also got under the covers.
“Umm, taking my clothes off and coming to bed with you at night are the best moments of my day. Pregnant or not. Of course, now being naked is like a release. I mean everything fits so tight!” They cuddled. Addy kissed her on the neck, as she chuckled knowing exactly what Karen meant.
“Do you want me to…” Karen started to touch Addy in all the right spots in an attempt to arouse her. She was going about it in an unusual way, though. Too anxiously. This was not the Karen way. Addy knew it all too well and quickly pulled back.
“What's wrong, Ker? What is it?” Addy's question came with a smile.
Karen had a contrite look. “I don't want you to be needy. I don't want you to go somewhere else to find what you are not getting at home.”
“Ker, you've got to be kidding me! All l I need is right here! I don't need anything or anyone else.”
“Addy, but look at me! I'm gigantic and I can't …I don't even feel like it anymore most of the times!”
Addy smiled lovingly. “Karen Larsen, I think that you are outrageously beautiful and I am totally, beyond hope in love with you! And I wouldn't change a second of this very special moment with you for the wildest sex on the planet…most certainly because I do not want to have sex with anyone else ever! Now can you get that through your head? And as far as not feeling like it, well, we knew this was coming. This is part of the whole thing and we'll live through it. So we'll adjust to when you feel like it and then if we get to a dry moment, we'll manage. You know very well it's a temporary thing.”
Karen's eyes were all watery. Addy came close to her face. “When I look into your eyes, it's as if I've gone through an imaginary door into another world. A world that belongs to me only, and where I am absolutely happy. Do you think I could even look at anyone else when I am captivated by you? By your gorgeous green eyes? Silly woman, I think I'm going to kiss you to death! I want to kiss your belly also. I want this baby to know that I cannot wait to see her and that I absolutely love her, as I love you. I'm going to sing it a lullaby in Spanish.”
“Oh, Lord! No!” Karen's tears had now turned to laughter. Addy always found a way to make her laugh.
Addy was pleased with the way she was able to dissuade Karen and how she had changed the focus of the conversation to what mattered most, the baby. “Duermete niño, duermete ya….”
Karen adored the moment. The joy of having her loved one lying on, what she thought was, her humongous belly singing to the child inside of her was beyond description. She could never imagine in her life a more tender moment.
When she was done with the singing, she came up and kissed Karen. She wanted to reassure her of her love. “I love you gorgeous.” She caressed Karen's face. “I'm all yours, baby, don't ever doubt that.”
Karen kissed her and snuggled into her. “I know.”
To be continued in Part 7
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