Disclaimer: This is a work of fiction. All the characters, places, and events portrayed in this story are products of the author's imagination, or are used fictitiously. If you choose to believe the individuals in this narrative remind you of someone, it will be of your own free will, there was no nudging on my part, cross my kidney.
Warning: In light of this being the beginning, there isn’t much to sweat about, really. But to give Justin Case proper due, this is intended for mature audience, and will include subjects inappropriate for minors at a later date.
P.S.: This is the second installment in the episodic tales about a person-at-arms and her faithful disciple. How many tales there are going to be only my muse knows. However, I never did, and I never will, leave a story unfinished. Most tales are probably gonna be readable as standalone, but I’d suggest reading them in the right order because of references to previous episodes, as well as possible cliffhangers. When the next episode will be available depends on the free time I’ll have on my hands and distractions surrounding me.
Another P.S.: Feel free to either praise or laugh at how far my English has come since my first fanfic.
BS: Praise Calliope for how far my bardic skills have advanced.
Trite Tales of a Knight in Rusty Armor
Tale II
How to Save a Bunch of Virgins
With the Help of a Sidekick-in-Training
by
Sam Pagan
Clichés can be quite fun.
That’s how they got to be clichés.
-Alan Bennett
Rhian groaned and gripped her head when along with consciousness arose a headache which drums followed the perfect beat of her own heart. “Gods above! Anybody caught the size of the shoe of a horse who ran me over?”
“As far as I can tell, it was about six or so mugs of mead, if that’s any help.”
Rhian turned her head to the left, looking in general direction of the voice, and groaned again when she recognized the smirking girl to be Ellery. “Oh, joyous hour! My smart mouth groupie-turned-wannabe-sidekick wisecracking bright and early in the morning. Nothing more stimulating to get you up and moving.”
“Ooh, your memory is intact, I see.” Ellery remarked jovially, enjoying Rhian’s misery more than she had the right to. “I was afraid mead might erased it all. And for your information, bright and early has passed long ago, it’s almost noon.”
Lying spread eagle on her belly, Rhian groaned once more and buried her face back into the pillow. “Damnation. I just hope those girls I’m supposed to save will still fit the definition of the word immaculate when I finally get them.”
“When we get them. You clearly stated that, as “your little sidekick”, I am bound to help you in your quest.”
Rhian lifted her head a fraction and blinked at her new friend. “I said that? To you?” She frowned in thought. “I don’t remember it.”
With a roll of her eyes, Ellery heaved a sigh. “Why I’m not surprised only your selective memory would work after all the mead you’ve filled your belly with.” She moved to the only chair in the room and sat down, expelling another heavy breath. “I assume you also don’t remember telling me the two of us will dip in your screwed gene pool together and add to it. After all, I’m not too old for you, and can certainly bear your nephew son who will again screw his cousins in an endeavor to carry on with the family tradition.”
Rhian groaned while rubbing her face with her palm. “Thank you for telling me so candidly I was an ass.”
“I didn’t say that you were.”
Rhian blinked in surprise. “You-you didn’t? Oh, then…” She frowned when she caught the implication accentuated by Ellery’s sassy grin. “Thank you, Lily, for your compassion and kind words. You surely know how to bring the best out of a person.”
“I try. Here.” Ellery offered her a mug of steaming brew she was holding. “Drink this.”
Rolling onto her back, Rhian accepted the mug and took a tentative sniff. Her nose twitched at the unflattering smell. “If you wanted to poison me, at least you could’ve tried and disguise the stench to make me less suspicious.”
Ellery chuckled. “This isn’t poisonous, this is cure for the poison you’ve put into yourself yesterday. Now, drink it. It’ll help with the headache, as well as settle your stomach. Puking on those virgins won’t convince them you’re there to save them. Although, puking on their kidnappers might be a brilliant strategic move.”
“I’ll try and remember that.” Rhian mumbled around the cup. After downing the contents, she smacked her lips and released a disgusting noise. “Blech! I hope this is as miraculous as you say and I didn’t simply fall for your freak lark.”
Ellery grinned evilly, and Rhian gulped.
“Come now, Lily. You do have at least a little bit of compassion in you, don’t you?”
“I guess you’ll just have to wait and see.”
“That’s not very reassuring, Lily.”
“It’s Ellery. And I’d suggest you get up, put some clothes on so as not give my father a heart attack, eat some breakfast, if you can call it such at this hour, and get a move on. Those virgins won’t save themselves, you know?”
“Has anyone ever told you you’re very demanding?”
Ellery smirked cheekily and clapped her hands loudly. “Let’s get to it, Rhian, time’s a-wasting.”
Watching Ellery leave the room, Rhian groaned. “At least she’s right about one thing. Those virgins certainly won’t save themselves.”
* * *
Casting one last glance over her shoulder, Rhian shuddered when the chilling glare she received from Ellery’s father shot through her like a crossbow bolt. He’s been giving her those ever since Ellery cheerily announced that she was leaving her childhood home in order to be Rhian’s sidekick, and his less than subtle icy stares hinted at whom he thought was responsible for putting such foolish idea into his daughter’s head. She snorted. Like there was a way anyone could talk Ellery into something she didn’t want to, or out of whatever her mind had set on.
‘He’s supposed to know that, he is her father, after all.’
“Relax, he didn’t really mean it.”
Pulled away from her musing by the voice next to her, Rhian looked sideways at her companion. “Huh?”
“I said, relax. I know my father scared you with his knife show, but your hide is perfectly safe. He just had to act the role of an overprotective parent.”
Rhian huffed indignantly. “What? Who says I’m scared? I’m not scared. He didn’t scare me. What gave you the idea I’m afraid of you father?”
“Oh, I don’t know. Could’ve been your constant squirming, flinching every time I touched you in front of him, and you watching his every move with great interest.”
Rhian dismissed Ellery’s claim with a nervous chuckle and a wave of her hand. “Bah! I wasn’t scared, I was just itching to get on the road. Virgins who need saving and all that.”
“Uh huh.”
Rhian decided the best course of action would be to ignore Ellery’s snickering. She cleared her throat and pulled on the reins in order to halt Brickel so she could mount him. Once in the saddle, she looked down at her companion. “Give me your hand.”
Ellery looked up with a frown. “Why?”
“So I can pull you up.”
“Pull me up? Pull me up where?”
Rhian rolled her eyes in exasperation. Wasn’t it obvious? “On Brickel!”
Ellery stood still, eying her suspiciously. “Why?”
This time Rhian added a loud huff to the roll of her eyes. “So we can get to the virgins a little faster! Since you’ve left poor Pip behind to do all the heavy work on the field, we’ve only got Brickel here to ride.”
“Oh. Well, why didn’t you say so?”
“Didn’t think I should mention something so evident.” Rhian muttered while hoisting Ellery up behind her. “Hang onto me.” When she felt arms tighten around her middle, she spurred Brickel into a canter with a click of her tongue a nudge of her knees.
* * *
“Are we there yet?” Ellery asked after they’ve been riding for some time.
Rhian closed her eyes, took a deep breath through her nose, then released it slowly through her mouth. “We’re certainly closer than the last time you asked me that same question.”
“Wow! Touchy, are we? All that built up frustration, maybe we should make a detour after we save those virgins and visit Nir.”
Rhian grimaced at the unsightly memories which immediately flooded her brain at the mention of the famous warrior. “You’ll never let me live that down, won’t you?”
Ellery snickered while shaking her head. “Nope.”
“Thank you so much, Lily.”
“It’s Ellery. And I’ll stop bringing that up when you start calling me by my name.”
“I am calling you by your name.”
Ellery sucked on her tooth, giving Rhian’s back a caustic look. “Right. Let’s go and save those virgins so you can go visit your… old... flame.”
Releasing a sharp whistle, Rhian pulled Brickel into a sudden stop, unintentionally making Ellery’s face to smack into her back. Ellery yelped at the less than gentle contact and quickly covered her pulsating nose, then blinked her eyes open in time to see Rhian twist in the saddle and greet her with an icy glare.
“Now, that was uncalled for, Lily.” Rhian accused, then turned afore and nudged Brickel into a light trot. “Yeesh, if those guys have had taken you along with the other virgins, they’d pay your father to take you back, and throw in the rest of the girls as an incentive.”
Ellery scowled. She liked good bantering, but this one barbed a bit too much. “Do you really have to keep pointing out that little fact of my personal life that is absolutely no business of yours?”
“Yep.”
“You really are an ass.”
“Thank you.”
Ellery huffed. “What was I thinking when I said I wanted to be your sidekick?”
“I have no idea.”
“I wasn’t talking to you! It was a rhetorical question.” Ellery snapped, then cringed with the memory that she mocked Rhian when she had asked a question of the same nature.
Up front, Rhian grinned, trying hard not to laugh out loud. Riling Ellery was so easy and extremely fun, and it was making the time pass faster. As long as she wasn’t on the receiving end, everything was fine in her world. But if it came to that, she was good at turning tables.
“Maybe I should’ve had let one of daddy’s knives to graze your butt a couple of times.”
Rhian gulped upon hearing Ellery’s remark. A good strategist always knows when to turn the table, and when to sidestep around it and get on their adversary’s good side.
“No! No, you did good by protecting my ass, Ellery. Just think about it. If that knife had grazed one of my cheeks, I wouldn’t be able to sit in the saddle, which means we would have to walk all the way. Walking would take more time, time those ruffians could use to unvirgin those girls.”
“You mean, deflower.” Ellery immediately corrected, her habit getting the better of her. “I don’t think “unvirgin” is a word. If it was, I’d know it, I had a tutor. Daddy didn’t really like spending money on him, though, saying I didn’t need no education as a sheep herder’s daughter. But I made him see all the benefits; I could count really high, so I could make sure nobody would cheat him. I could read, therefore, I could relate roadsigns to him, or interpret writs and invoices and such. It made him proud, as others, save a few, in the village came to our home asking if I could read something for them, and even offered to pay for my services in some way.”
“Ah. So, he liked it once he realized he could make money off of you.”
“No, it wasn’t like that!” Ellery instantly defended her father. “He--”
“I get him, though, I do. After all, he’d have to pay double to someone just to consider taking you with ‘em.”
Considerably insulted, Ellery huffed and leaned back a bit to cross her arms over her chest, but quickly abandoned the idea and returned her arms to encircle Rhian’s waist when she almost fell off of Brickel. But, as a payback, she squeezed a lot more than was necessary, making Rhian flinch in discomfort.
“Ow! What was that for?”
“A special bonus for the one willing to take me with ‘em.”
Rhian grumbled something in response that Ellery was unable to decipher, which was a good thing considering it would earn her more than just squeezing as a special bonus.
“What did you jus--”
“Shush!” Rhian interjected, cocking her head to one side as if to hear better. And true enough, she did hear noise which usually existed in camps with a large number of people. Besides, she knew they were closing in on the marauders’ camp, she got a detailed description of the area where some witnesses claimed to have seen a large band of unsavory characters, when she was in the investigative stage of this mission.
She dismounted Brickel in one smooth motion, and reached for the saddlebags to unlace the scabbard housing her sword. A moment later, the sheath was resting against her left hip.
“Stay here.” she commanded while handing Brickel’s reins over to Ellery. “If something should go awry, I want you and Brickel out of here, are we clear? Go here.” She handed her companion a small piece of parchment with a detailed map. “This is where my grandfather has his office. Just notify him about what happened to me, I’m sure he’ll give you some compensation for the information.”
“What?! Are you insane?” Ellery hissed, aghast by Rhian’s suggestion. “Rhian, I’m not leaving you to deal with these ruffians alone. Who knows how many of them are there.”
“Lily, you’ve got no training in either defense or offense. I can’t afford to look after you, too, and focus on dealing with the bad guys. When this is done, and if I’m still among the breathing, we’ll start with your training.”
“I can take care of myself, I’ll have you know!” Ellery retorted sharply, offended by Rhian’s lack of faith in her martial abilities. “I may not know how to wield a sword, but I’m proficient enough with daggers, and I certainly know how to whack someone in the head.”
Rhian put her fists on her hips and raised an eyebrow as she regarded her stubborn companion. “Daggers are only useful to assassins who know how to sneak upon an unaware target. As to the whacking… with what exactly would you whack someone in the head? I don’t have any staves or clubs hidden in my pockets to spare.”
“We are surrounded by trees, are we not?” Ellery indicated the vast forest with her arms spread open while giving her a beatific smile. “A big girl like you, I’m sure you’re strong enough to break one thick branch for me to use.”
Rhian stared at her for a moment, then with a growl unsheathed her sword. Ellery gulped, thinking she had perhaps pushed Rhian a bit too far, and yelped when with a roar the warrior charged toward her. She quickly cowered her head with her arms, wincing when something breezed much too close to her head for comfort. Heartbeat later, a resounding thwack made her jump in the saddle.
“Here.”
Ellery slowly uncovered her head and blinked her eyes open. She sighed with relief when she realized she was still alive, then with a frown glanced between Rhian and the thick branch she was offering.
“Uh, thanks?” she squeaked while taking the branch.
“Now stay here!” Rhian demanded. “I mean it, Lily. Don’t go after me, and use this to defend yourself if someone gets past me. If several someones get past me, forget about fighting, just get Brickel and yourself to safety.”
Ellery rolled her eyes. “Fine, I’ll stay. For now.” she muttered the last part so Rhian was unable to hear it. With wary eyes, she watched as the warrior moved stealthily through the woods, sneaking toward the unsuspecting men. Pursing her lips, she dismounted Brickel, then smacked his rump with just enough force to signal him he should make himself scarce.
Brickel neighed, then obediently trotted away. Ellery nodded, satisfied that he adhered to her command, then grinned. Rhian certainly won’t be satisfied when she’ll have learned her horse was the only one who’ll ever obey her.
Following the warrior from a safe distance, she was vigilant, observing her surroundings as much as she was Rhian’s movement, careful not to create enough noise to make someone intrigued and ready to search for its source.
Reaching the clearing the bandits decided to claim as their base of operation, Rhian went prone and crawled into the bushes at the verge of the camp. Her eyes darted around, spying through the small gap she created, taking everything in.
“Ten men.” she murmured to herself, then brought her focus to the caged cart where the bad guys held their victims. “Eight girls. All accounted for.” She narrowed her eyes, noticing they were in a fairly good condition, considering. And that indicated only one thing: the virgins were meant to be sold as slaves. “So, you sons of bitches aren’t after pleasure, you’re after money.”
That was good news, actually, for she could safely assume the girls weren’t harmed physically and had remained intemerate. Virgins fetched ten times the price over the women who were “sampled”, and she thanked the gods that this lot was greedy.
Her focus turned back to the men. They seemed to be in good shape; not exactly muscled, but not fat, either, and mildly disciplined. The weapons they used weren’t of the best quality, but looked well taken care of. Nevertheless, Rhian grinned. She still haven’t tested their skill with said weapons, but she was confident she could take them all on. After all, she had battled creatures who possessed the strength of twenty men, and lived to tell the tale. And it wasn’t simply thanks to Nir’s armor.
Done with assessing the situation, she surmised this was the best time to attack. The slavers were relaxed, paying more attention to the card game they were playing than their surroundings, so she had the element of surprise, and she was determined to use it.
Slowly, Rhian rose to a crouch, careful to remain hidden until she was ready to charge. Suddenly, a horse nearby neighed and flicked its tail nervously, sensing her nearness. Rhian stayed completely still, waiting for the animal to calm down. When she was certain the men paid no heed to the horse, she sprung from the bushes with a yell, sword at the ready.
Caught unaware, the goons kept staring at the chimera rushing at them, until her sword arced through the air and relieved one of their comrades of his head.
One down, nine more to go.
Shaken out of their trance, the rest of the men scrambled to their feet, yowling their own war cries while pulling out their swords, or readying their clubs, maces, and spears.
Rhian grinned ferally, blocking the upward sweep of a mace handled by the thug she dubbed as Smelly, then pivoted to deflect the blade descending toward her, directed by Stinky. Seeing No-Teeth was about to join the fray, she executed a backflip, making space for herself to prevent being cornered. She growled when she sensed someone was trying to sneak up on her, and she quickly went down on one knee, reversed her sword and thrust it backwards, letting Icky’s momentum to help him impale himself on the blade.
Two down.
Pale eyes scanned the battlefield, in split second surmising which bandit posed the biggest threat. Rhian decided Noxious had to go next, but Yucky wanted to prove he was brave and stupid, and lunged at her. She roared and met his sword with a parry, kicking Stinky, who tried to flank her, at the same time. Her booted foot caught him in the stomach and made him slide on his back several paces away. She didn’t bother to look if he would get up, instead focusing on No-Teeth who pushed himself into her personal space. She quickly switched to one handed stance and, unperceived by others, reached for the dagger at the small of her back. The blade did what it was designed for: it ambushed its victim, freeing No-Teeth from this mortal, unpalatable existence.
Seven to go.
Before too long, Rhian stopped counting, well on her way to clear out the entire camp since none of the men seemed interested in surrendering. Now, the only ones who were still stinking up the place were Noxious and Whiffy. She mostly ignored the second outlaw, sending only an odd kick or punch in his direction to keep him at bay, instead focusing on the leader. Noxious proved to be quite a tough nut to crack. Rhian was cocksure he couldn’t best her, but his skill was on the boss level, and he was certainly making her shed some sweat to gain this victory.
Ellery watched the battle going on, silently cheering Rhian on. She was hidden in the bushes, where the warrior first charged from, contented to be a simple observer since it didn’t seem like Rhian needed any help. And remaining quiet and unseen would nicely deceive the warrior into thinking that she dutifully followed her order.
Ellery grinned when Rhian blocked with ease yet another attempt to break through her defenses, or at least, it looked like it. But then she frowned when for the first time she noticed there was a fine film of sweat covering Rhian’s skin. She also looked like she was getting tired, her movements not as fluid as they were at the beginning of this match, and Ellery started to worry. There were only two baddies left, but it appeared the best got to be the last.
And then it happened.
Or, at least, Ellery was positive it happened. To her dying breath, she would claim with conviction that Rhian’s concentration was slipping, and that she, as her sidekick-in-training, had to do something, so she did the most logical thing.
“Rhian, behind you!” she yelled as she jumped out of the bushes and attacked Whiffy with her branch.
Rhian, of course, knew that Whiffy was behind her, and was, in fact, waiting for him to come closer so she could easily kick him away without taking her eyes off of Noxious. However, Ellery’s yell prompted her to peer over her shoulder, and Noxious seized the moment of her inattention, scoring a strike.
Rhian yelped and glanced at her arm where a nasty gash was now mocking her, then gritted her teeth when she blocked Noxious’ next attack, which jarred her new wound. She swore, then swore she’d have to have a talk with a certain redhead and enforce some rules. Still, if nothing else, she could now put all her focus on the leader and let Ellery whack out of Whiffy what little sense he possessed.
She was now slowly getting tired, she wouldn’t deny that, but a huge smile blossomed on her lips when Noxious started making more and more mistakes, indicating his stamina was draining faster than hers. Encouraged, she pressed harder, though patient and calculating, waiting for a lapse in his defenses. She didn’t have to wait for long, and she exploited his weakness to its fullest. It was a split moment, a blink of an eye, but it was enough for her to skewer him like a rabbit on a spit.
Panting, she just stood there for a moment, catching her breath, then turned around when she heard a squeak. She snorted when she observed Whiffy on his hands and knees getting the literal ass walloping of his life.
“I think you can stop now, Lily.” she commented. “As it is, I don’t think the poor guy will be able to sit anytime soon.
“Yes, yes, please!” Whiffy whined, and Rhian snorted again. At this moment, he looked nothing like the grisly bandit that he was. “I’m giving up the life of crime, I swear! Just arrest me and get me away from her! She’s crazy!”
“Can’t argue with that.” Rhian murmured, careful not to be heard by certain someone, while she cleaned her sword so she could sheathe it. “You should count yourself lucky.” she retorted out loud as she walked to the man. She unfastened specially crafted manacles from her belt and restrained him, then pulled him to his feet. “If Lily here hadn’t jumped at you when she did, you’d be dead like the rest of your friends here.”
“Ellery! My name is Ellery!” she declared, disgruntled by the fact that Rhian still refused to use her actual name.
Rhian smirked impishly. “That’s what I said.”
Ellery glared at her through narrowed eyes, then pointedly made a show of twirling the branch she was holding. “You saw my demonstration with this stick here, yeah?” She now produced a decidedly fiendish grin, making unnerved Rhian take an unconscious step back, the act which caused her grin to widen. “Now imagine me joining my father with his knives.”
Rhian gulped before mustering up her bravado. It would do her reputation no good if the word spread that she was afraid of small redheads wielding branches, and whom she topped by a full head. And she had no doubt prying ears next to her had greedily slurped in every word exchanged in this conversation so the big mouth could later blabber it to whomever would care to listen.
“This again?” she scoffed in feigned nonchalance, then turned a murderous glare in Whiffy’s direction who had the audacity to snicker at her. She smirked in satisfaction and her chest puffed up when the man gulped audibly and lost all interest in the ongoing dialogue. “Bah! Told ya, there was nothing to it. Now, c’mon, my sidekick-in-training. We’ve wasted enough time, let’s get these girls back to their families before they recover from shock and start clacking. I’m out of herbs for the headache that’d give me.”
Ellery’s seen right through Rhian’s false confidence, but let her off the hook. For now. “Yeah, let’s.”
It didn’t take them long to open the cage and corral the girls, and soon they were all on their way to the village the virgins were taken from.
As soon as they stepped into the village, the girls were greeted by their respective parents and ushered to the safety of their homes, while Whiffy was led to jail by the militia leader, to wait there for the magister who would sentence him to whatever punishment he deserved. Not to feel left out, Rhian was forced to visit the local healer to take care of the gash on her arm that Noxious inflicted, even though the wound had begun healing.
“What now?” Ellery asked when the entire ordeal was over.
“Now we go to my grandfather to let him know the job is done, and to get our reward.” she waved the parchment she was holding in her hand, and which stood as proof the contract was fulfilled. “And then we’ll see if there’s any new quests that need to be done, ‘cause I’m all empty.”
“How do you even get these missions, anyway?” Ellery asked, intrigued by how all this worked. “Do you go door to door and ask people if they need someone rescued?”
Rhian laughed as she rearranged the saddlebags to sit more comfortably on Brickel’s broad back, then hoisted herself up into the saddle. She reached down for her companion and in one smooth motion helped her up to settle behind her. When Ellery wound her arms around her waist, she gently nudged Brickel into a trot.
“No, there’s a message board in front of my grandfather’s office. People leave their posts there, and pigeons fly in from places afar. It’s a system that works. Though I happened upon several people who were in need of help while I was on my way to another quest, or was going home. I even had a few missives delivered by couriers while in the middle of nowhere. How’d they find me, I have no clue.”
“Huh.” Ellery didn’t say anything more as she thought about it. Then, out of the blue, she asked, “Hey, Rhian, you never told me what’s so special about Nir’s armor.”
“I haven’t?”
“No, you haven’t.”
“Ah. Well, it boosts my stamina and I heal rather quickly.”
“Huh.” Ellery nodded her head in appreciation. “Okay, those are not bad perks to have.”
“Yep.”
There was a moment of silence, and Rhian reveled in it, knowing it wouldn’t last long.
“So, you’re going to introduce me to your grandfather as your partner, right?”
Up front, Rhian released a sound somewhere between a sigh and a whine. She just knew her grandfather will laugh his head off when he hears about how Ellery managed to rope her into this groupie-turned-sidekick business. “I’ll tell him I’ll be training you to be my sidekick, yes.”
“Partner.” Ellery corrected without missing a beat.
Rhian’s eyebrows skyrocketed and she craned her neck to look behind her. “How did we jump from a groupie to sidekick to now partner?” she asked incredulously.
“Well, when I complete my training, I’ll be your equal, therefore, we’ll be partners. Until then, you’re allowed to tell people I’m your sidekick.”
“I’m allowed?!” Rhian’s voice hitched up in outrage.
“Yes, I won’t be offended by it. But only until I finish my training.”
“Fine!” Rhian conceded immediately, though not entirely happily, wanting to avoid the battle of wits which she knew she’d lose, anyway. “But don’t think you’ll worm out of our initial deal. You’ll still wash and mend my clothes, cook, and clean the house.”
“Oh, of course you remember that.” Ellery deadpanned. “You can’t remember how idiotically you behaved, but this absurd demand stayed in the forefront of your mind. Says a lot about you, you tyrant.”
“I have my priorities.” Rhian smirked. “Besides, you really don’t won’t me anywhere near the needles and threads, or the kitchen. Just ask my sisters, they’ll tell you even our brothers sew and cook better than I.”
“I’ll just bet they suck at other chores that you’ve done, instead, like hunting or fishing, right?” Ellery commented sarcastically.
“Yep.” Rhian confirmed with pride, ignoring her companion’s tone. “I still have my best fishing rod displayed on the mantle above the fireplace back at my parents’ home. I only take it down on special occasions.”
“Must be a very special rod.” Ellery scoffed.
Rhian again overlooked the gibe, though with increasing difficulty. “Well, if my brothers knew how to handle their own rods, one of theirs would be on display instead of mine. Ain’t my fault I’m better at fishing than that lot.”
“And I bet yours is also unnecessarily bigger than any of theirs.”
Rhian cleared her throat. “It’s slightly longer, yes, so I can thrust it farther. But I know how to handle it, I haven’t had a fish snap my line since I was fourteen years old.”
“That young, huh?” Ellery jeered again.
Up front, Rhian scowled. “Are we still talking about my fishing gear, or has your virgin mind taken to some distant, untouched shores that yearn to be caressed?”
Ellery growled as she loosened her grip on Rhian’s waist only to free one hand so she could slap the warrior across the back of her head. “Don’t you even dare to assume to put your rod and my virginity in the same sentence!”
As soon as she said it, she realized her own mistake.
“Don’t you dare!” she warned when she felt Rhian was about to speak.
Rhian was dying. She wanted to laugh out loud, but managed to reduce it to a loud snicker. She had the perfect comeback at the tip of her tongue, but suspected it might set Ellery off into quite a fit. Still, it was a good leverage to be had.
“I won’t, as long as you forget about Nir.”
Ellery narrowed her eyes at the almost singsong voice, and silently admitted this round went to Rhian. “Fine!” She leaned back to fold her arms across her chest, forgetting it didn’t quite work out the first time she’d tried to do that, and yelped when she felt herself slipping off of Brickel. Fortunately for her, Rhian’s reflexes were fast, and she was pulled back into the saddle and her arms were put back around her companion’s waist.
“You shouldn’t pout while in the saddle, it could be dangerous.” Rhian informed her mirthfully. “Try and wait till we dismount, or at least ask me to stop and put you down so you could pout away.”
Unamused, Ellery sucked on her tooth, but astutely pressed down the urge to cross her arms. “You have anything else smart to add, oh great scholar?” she asked snidely.
“Mm, not at the moment, no. I’ll let you know when I think of something, though.”
“Oh, goody.” Ellery grumbled, then winced when Brickel found a root in the road he just had to unceremoniously hop over, making her bounce in the saddle and bump her head against the broad back in front of her. She sighed. It was going to be a long ride to Rhian’s grandfather.
End of tale two