Disclaimer: Xena and Gabrielle do not belong to me. They belong to MCA/Universal and Renaissance Pictures. I am not claiming they're mine. Just borrowing them.

Violence: Some harassment, Rape and murder implied.

Subtext: Yes always.

Love/Sex Disclaimer: There's love and sex between two women.

Rating: NC-17 for graphic sex.

Feedback: Yes please. Send as much as you want.

Written: October 2001-December 2001

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My name is Gabrielle. Let me tell you the story of how I found and lost the love of my life.

It was the first day of my senior year. It felt like it had taken forever to get here. College is going to be much better than this zoo. College will be filled with people who actually want to learn. No longer will I have to be classed up with these illiterate party animals. Same brainless morons I've been stuck with for the last twelve years.

I can almost guarantee one of them will ask me to tutor them. Most likely it will be that jock Aries. He annoys me more than all of them put together. He's always flirting trying to get me to go out on dates with him. Yes he's one of the most handsome boys in school. The other girls think I'm crazy for not accepting his offers. I'm no fool though. I know exactly what he wants. He's just like every other jock on the soccer team he just wants to get in a girl's pants. Now I don't know why he chose me. Most likely cause I can't stand him. He looks at me as a challenge he'll never get to touch.

I walk into my first class. I've had this teacher before. I'm in for many boring mornings ahead. I settle in a desk located at the back of the class. I have a perfect view of all the students filtering in. Most of them are busy filling each other in on how exciting their summers were.

And just as luck would have it Aries walks in with his cronies. He scans the room. Spots me and cracks a fake Hollywood smile as he walks over to me. I brace myself against the sound of his voice. Something I can honestly say I haven't missed. I seriously don't know what the other girls see in him. I find him completely loathsome.

He sits down at the desk in front of me, swiveling so he's facing me. Ah the moment arrives when he speaks. “How was your summer Gabrielle?”

“Perfectly fine since I didn't see you during it.” I say as I pull out my book. Before I can read the first word he pushes the book down. Staring at me he try's again. “How bout you let me take you out to dinner tonight? You know something like a welcome back to school dinner. What do you say?” I say the same thing I've said a million times before. “Not in this lifetime Aries. Go take a cheerleader to dinner.” Still smiling he gets up to join his usual group of airheads, leaving me in peace.

I'm just about to look down at my novel when someone catches my eye. A girl I've never seen before. She's attractive in the face and has a noticeably athletic build. Her black hair is streaked with blue. Her style of dress clearly in the alternative. She flashes a true smile at me.

I quickly look away. I'm not even sure why I was staring. It's not like I haven't seen people dressed like her before. I look up and see her sitting at the desk in front of me. She turns and gives me another one of her dazzling smiles.

I watch as she extends her hand and says a name, a name that cannot be hers. My hearing must be going. “What did you say?”

“I said my name's Xe. What's yours?” I take her hand and shake it, “That's a strange name for a girl.”

“It's short for Xena.” She released my hand. “What's your name?” My brain must have been on the fritz because it took me a few moments to register I had been asked a question. “Gabrielle.” I don't know what it was about this girl but my normal demeanor had shut down the second I had laid my eyes on her. Strange, it's most likely because she's new. No, that can't be it because I've met plenty of new students over the years. None of them ever affected me the way she was.

I try to focus on the teacher but it's a useless battle. He's too boring and she's too interesting. I can't seem to stop myself from studying every strand of her hair or notice every move she makes. What's happening to me? The bell sounds ending the class. My eyes follow her as she exit's the room. I gather my bag and rush to my next class. Maybe there I'll be able to pay attention.

Lunch time rolls around. I haven't seen Xe since first period. As if she's heard my thoughts she appears bearing a tray filled with cafeteria food. She smiles as she sees me. In seconds it seems she's seated across from me. I look up from my book to see her grinning, as she pops fry after fry into her mouth.
I try to go back to my reading but it's a pointless feat. There's no way I can concentrate while she's starring at me especially with her grinning like a fool. “What are you grinning at?” She grins even more as she replies, “I'm grinning at a pretty lady.” I couldn't stop myself as I involuntarily looked around to see if anyone else had heard what she had said.

Her laughter was like the singing of angels to my ears. For no reason at all I joined her. Somewhere between breathes she asked me to show her around town. I agreed with out a second thought. Before the bell sounded the end of lunch we had exchanged phone numbers and had made plans for her to pick me up on Saturday.

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On Saturday morning I woke up late. Xe arrived promptly as scheduled. My brother let her in, sending her to my room where she found me in my bra and underwear. I didn't bother to blush as I was running too far behind.

When I finished dressing I turned to find her in the same position against my doorframe with her eyes focused entirely on me, a vacant, dreamy look glinting in the blue of her iris. Strangely enough I didn't find this in anyway uncomfortable. A soft smile graced my lips as I snapped my fingers to get her back to the present.

Smiling she grabbed my hand and led me out to her car. A 1989 charcoal gray Buick Lesabre. I must say I've seen more stable looking cars in a junk yard. She held the passenger door open and waited as I apprehensively stepped into the vehicle.

Now I must say the inside of the car was much nicer compared to its outer appearance. The interior was a dark blue cloth and vinyl, standard for old cars I assume. I was unprepared for what was next though. She turned the key and I would have sworn we were parked beside a brand new top of the line sports car. Apparently her car hid its true nature. I couldn't help but wonder if the car mirrored its owner.

She insisted our first stop be to the local arcade. I spent the next two hours watching Xe win thousands of tickets. When she was finished, due to the fact she had ran out of money, she took her tickets up to the counter and traded them in for a stuffed sports car.

As we headed out to her, she stopped in the middle of the parking lot, looked at me and said, “Here I won this for you.” The smile never left her face as I accepted her gift. She took my hand once we were seated and asked me where I wanted to eat dinner. I'm not sure why I said the place I did, but it's too late now.

It's six that same day and we had just pulled up in front of the local hot spot. All the so called popular people came here for dates and just to hang out. I'm sure if I had agreed to go out with Aries; he would have brought me here to show off to his buddies that he had finally conquered me. Like that would ever happen. He can have his cheerleaders, but he would never have me.

I'm not exactly sure why I even chose this place. Maybe I wanted to show off Xe. Now there's an idea. I walked through the door with Xe behind me. Scanning the dining area I found the perfect table and a bonus to the package. Aries was there with his flavor of the week. For the first time in my life I gave Aries a true smile as I led Xe to the booth in the corner. As we passed by some brainless jock blurted out a phrase I should have been offended by.

Dinner consisted of cheeseburgers, fries, and good conversation. Xe told me about the places she had traveled before her parents relocated here. She was unlike any of the other people I knew. To me she seemed far more interesting than anyone else.

As she drove me home I couldn't help but feel down. I didn't want this day to end, especially not with me just getting out of her car and walking to my door. What was I thinking?! Did I just have that thought? I tried to push those thoughts to the back of my brain. In no time at all she had pulled the car up in front of my house.

I sat fidgeting for a moment before I looked over at Xe. I relaxed instantly at seeing her content expression. I don't know what came over me but I leaned across the seat and placed my lips on hers so softly I would have doubted it existed except for the blast of sensation that light touch produced. Drawing back slowly I sat for a moment to catch my breath, as a lazy smile graced Xe's face.

I couldn't stop myself from smiling as I got out of the car telling her I'd call her some time the next day. I bounced into my house and up to my room. Where I fell into a contented, relaxed sleep with dreams filled with Xe's smiling face.

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My eyes opened to bright sunlight streaming in from behind my curtains. Memories of the night before resurfaced. I spent a good hour laying in my bed smiling in remembrance. The ringing of the phone brought me back to the present. Picking up the receiver I was greeted by the voice of my thoughts. Now I'm not usually the chatty type, especially not on the phone. I spent no less than an hour on the phone with her that morning.

I don't know what it is about Xe, I'll probably never know either, but she seemed to make something in my being come to life. Corny huh? Since the first time I saw her, my stomach has been aflutter. I could see a long meaningful friendship in the future. I couldn't wait till Monday when I would see Xe again.

For the rest of the day I kept myself busy doing odd jobs for my mom or cleaning. Sometime during the day I managed to rearrange the furniture in my room. My room was the cleanest it had ever been. That evening when I couldn't find anything to occupy my mind further, I gave in and called Xe.

We talked for over an hour about nothing important again. I told her what I had done that day. I told her it was to keep my mind off thoughts of her. I hadn't realized it until then, but I was nervous that Xe didn't feel the same. After all neither one of us had mentioned last night's kiss. As if she knew what I was thinking she silenced my fears by telling me that she had been thinking of me all day also. Sleep came easily to me that night.

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Everyday for the next week it seemed I spent every available moment with Xe. We went to the movies, dinner, and she once took me to see the play “Romeo and Juliet”. People at school started to spread rumors about us. They didn't bother me because I know the truth. Through all this time though, the kiss was never mentioned or happened again. It was almost as if it were a figment of my imagination.

It was Saturday again, Xe took me out to a nice quiet look out point to star gaze. We were laid out on the hood of her car just starring at the star studded sky. It was a very relaxing night and I started the conversation that had been on my mind all week. She appeared to be expecting the question. She turned towards me, calmly asking me if I had liked it. I was honest telling her that yes I had liked the kiss.

She didn't smile for once; she seemed to be serious tonight. It kind of worried me. Looking me right in the eye, she asked me if she could kiss me. I swallowed and could only whisper my agreement with my constricted throat. My mind was racing at this moment, going over everything that could have rated a relationship in my short life. It didn't take long to cover. I had one boyfriend back in 7^th grade; all we had done together was hold hands for the week we had gone out.

My first kiss I had given to Xe. Now I was probably about to be given an experience I had never even dreamt of in my entire life. A brief doubt flashed before my mind's eye of Xe being selfish as I assumed boys were at this. My doubts were squashed immediately. I knew she wouldn't take advantage of me, instinctively I knew.

Xe leaned towards me her eyes glued to mine. She halted a hair's breath from my lips, studying my eyes. Now was the time to back out if I had wanted too. The next moment Xe's lips were touching mine ever so gently. The kiss was soft and sweet. She pulled back before I was ready for it to end.

I opened my eyes to catch her licking her lips, lips that I still wanted to be kissing. Not letting her bask in her ego for long I leaned forward pressing my lips firmly to hers. I took the lead and deepened the kiss as I slid myself on to her lap. I threaded my fingers through her thick dark hair, holding her to me. Again she pulled away too soon.

We stared at each other. Need of something I was unfamiliar with, clear in her eyes. Our chest's rose and fell rapidly with our breathing. I don't know where our urgency came from; we couldn't keep our lips off each other. Never in my life would I have imagined kissing to be this much fun.

Her hands rubbed circles along my back. Causing sensations I never wanted to end. Her lips traveled along my jaw till they reached my neck. I couldn't contain the moan that coursed through my body at the touch of her lips. I leaned my head back to allow her more room. One of her hands slid slowly around my side to rest on my stomach as she danced her tongue along my clavicle.

Through her wonderful ministrations I felt her hand slowly creep up the front of my shirt. A switch went off in my brain, even though I didn't want her to stop that now would be a wise time to stop. I wasn't ready to take this relationship to the next level. No matter how good she made me feel. I lifted my head and placed my hands on her shoulders, gently pushing her away. I looked down into her eyes and simply said I wasn't ready. I don't know what caused them but tears just rolled down my cheeks. She pulled me into her embrace and held me till my tears stopped whispering to me that it was ok. That it was alright not to be ready for that step.

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The next day I began to worry. Xe hadn't called or stopped by. Maybe last night had just been a game to her. Maybe since I didn't go through with it I wasn't worth her time. Well if that was how she was then she wasn't worth my time either. Whoa wait why am I drawing these kinds of conclusions about a girl? Because I like this girl a lot and I don't know why or what to do about it.

The next day at school I went straight to homeroom and waited for school to begin. I didn't feel like saying hi to my usual group this morning. As if sensing my dower mood, who else should show up but Aries. The first words out of his mouth were some corny line followed by an offer to have dinner with him. This morning I did not feel like acknowledging his presence. And that's exactly what I did. I never saw him get mad before, apparently being ignored really pisses him off if the way he stormed out of the room was any indication. I had never actually seen a desk flip that many times in the air.

I laid my head down on the desk to take a little pre-school nap. I'm wakened by Xe calling my name. I raise my head and just sort of stare at her. Immediately she asks me what's wrong. “I have a lot on my mind.” is my reply. She glances around to make sure we're alone before she looks at me and says, “I want to apologize for not calling you yesterday. I had to leave town for the day. I took my mother to see her sister, who is in the hospital. Its four hours away and I didn't get back home till around midnight. So I figured it was too late to call.”

Taking a deep breath she continued, “I'll be honest with you. I like you very much. I want you to know that Saturday night wasn't a game or anything remotely like one. Will you accept my apology?” I didn't know if I should be freaked out at how she seemed to be able to read my mind or not. “Is your aunt doing ok?” My question seemed to please her because she gave me one of her brilliant smiles.

That day I signed onto the track team. Practice started the next day, Xe was there watching me practice. I'm not sure what kept her interest for the two hours watching a bunch of people run around in circles. I was glad she stayed for the whole practice; it saved me from having to track her down. I liked having my very own cheerleader.

For that first month she went to every practice and meet the team had. After the meet, I would join her for pizza. I hardly ever celebrated with the team after victories. I preferred spending my time with Xe. My mind wasn't filled with much else that didn't include Xe in some way.

It was quite lonely when Xe went with her mother to help her aunt move to the east coast. She was gone a week too long according to me. She made it back in time to see the state track meet. Our school won the championship. Xe took me out to the “fancy” restaurant in town to congratulate me.

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I had been hearing rumors around school about Xe and me. I didn't pay them any heed. High school gossip will spread no matter what the rumor is. Aries had been bothering me more lately. He's stop me on my way to classes, he was beginning to make my skin crawl. When I saw him heading in my direction, I wanted to run the other way. There was an air of malice about him now. I rounded the corner of the hall and slammed squarely into Aries. His hands clamped down onto my shoulders holding me in place. There was a strange disconcerting glint in his eyes. He began to ramble on about how we kept running into each other and that we should go out on, at least one date.

I wasn't paying close attention to his words; I was more concerned with getting out of his grasp. Being this close to him was starting to make me very nervous. Without thinking I stomped on his foot, stepping out of his reach as soon as I was released. I turned and hurried to my last class of the day. I didn't even want to wonder what was going through Aries head lately. Whatever it was couldn't be good and it scared me that in some way it involved me.

Xe was in this class so at least I wouldn't have to worry about Aries after class. I leaned over to Xe and whispered that I needed to talk to her tonight. She squeezed my knee under the lab table, as she paid attention to the bio teacher. I wasn't able to pay attention to a single word the teacher was saying. My mind was too full with other topics at the moment. Aries was a major player in my brain right beside Xe. Both were confusing me beyond my means. I needed to try and fix one of them. Seeing as Xe was my best bet I'd try and resolve that little problem tonight.

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Xe picked me up on time, I felt bad for keeping her in the dark concerning my problems. We drove in silence for sometime before I spoke. “Do you still like me Xe?” I seemed to have caught her off guard by the way she snapped her head to look at me. “What do you mean? Of course I like you. I thought you knew that.”

This was just getting better and better. I was digging a hole and I had to get out before I dug myself deeper. I decided to stop being indirect and just say what was really bothering me. “Do you find me attractive? Like physically.” Now this really caught her off guard by the way she jerked the car to the side of the road. I was becoming nervous the longer she stared at me.

Xe leaned towards me and gave me a soft, light kiss. Breaking away she sat back, reached out and ran her hand through my hair. “Was that what you were missing?” I felt a soft blush color my cheeks as I told her that yes I had missed her kisses. She went on to tell me how she had wanted to kiss and touch me but wasn't sure if that was what I wanted. She didn't want to push me into anything.

To silence her I slid onto her lap and kissed her hard. I didn't want her to be unsure of what I wanted. This time I did the exploring. I kissed down her neck, savoring the feel of her silky skin. I ran my hand over her firm stomach, feeling it contract against my fingertips. I lapped at her throat, nipping tiny little bruises onto her skin. I wasn't sure what had gotten into me, I had never acted in such a way during my entire life.

I felt her hands on my back, massaging. My blood felt like it was on fire. I'm not sure how this change occurred, all day I had been down. Now I was trying to tear Xe's clothes off. I ground my hips against Xe as my hand traveled to her breast. My brain was working like a strobe light. Distorting my memory as the events played out. What was wrong with me?

Xe pushed me from her by my shoulders. I looked at her as I recovered my breathing. “Did I do something wrong?” “No. I just don't want our first time to be in a car. I'd much rather have you on a bed where I can treat you the way you deserve.” Xe told me as she brushed a strand of hair from my face. I slid off her lap but stayed curled around her arm as she drove me back to my house. I didn't want to leave her tonight. I couldn't stand the thought of sleeping alone. “Will you stay with me tonight?” Before she said a word, she parked the car, “Of course.”

I left Xe to change in my room while I changed in the bathroom. Usually I'd have no problem changing in front of another female. Xe was no regular female. I entered my room to find Xe in one of my pajama sets. I smiled; it was all I could do to keep from laughing. She looked completely out of place wearing my light blue cloud covered pajamas.

“You wouldn't happen to have anything else I could wear would you? I could sleep in my clothes. It wouldn't be the first time I've had to.” Not letting her wear her clothes to bed, I went to my dresser and pulled out a pair of cotton shorts and a tank top for her. Xe not being the modest type shucked the pajama's right before my eyes. She looked up when she was only wearing my shorts and a sports bra. My mouth had gone dry at the sight. Some how I did find my voice and told her that maybe she should sleep in what she had on.

Xe must have seen the intent in my eyes, because she pulled the tank top on. “Which side do you want?” she asked pointing behind her to the bed. I lay down close to the wall. I didn't matter what side I was on, I was going to sleep on Xe as soon as she was comfortable. She got into bed and I rolled into her arms. My head nestled on her shoulder with her arm wrapped around me. I closed my eyes and fell into a deep peaceful sleep.

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I awoke the next morning in the same position, Xe's scent being the best aroma to wake up to. Mom cooking breakfast had never smelled this good. Now waking up to Xe cooking breakfast would be the perfect wake up scenario. Having her in my bed right now was enough to placate me. I opened my eyes to find her looking at me; a small smile graced my lips. She shifted till her lips were on mine. I licked my lips before saying that I could get used to waking up this way.

My mother's footsteps could be heard heading in my room's direction. Scrambling out of bed, I just made it far enough away when mom opened the door to say good morning. I stood in the middle of the room as she asked Xe what she would like for breakfast. Mom left soon after.

I don't know which it was, my mother almost catching me in bed with another girl or my mother almost catching me in bed with another person. I was shaken and I didn't know why. Xe appeared to have an idea of what was going on in my head because she quietly got dressed. Before she walked out of my room she gave me a small hug and whispered that it would get easier. Xe went down stairs, leaving me thoroughly confused. What would get easier? I dressed in a simple shirt and a pair of jeans, and then joined the rest of the family for breakfast.

Breakfast consisted of French toast, bacon, and eggs. I sat quietly eating while my parents asked Xe different questions. You know the usual “Parent” questions that are asked of a new friend. Xe didn't seem to mind the interrogation. She just calmly answered each one. I do believe she was racking up points with my parents. Both seemed pleased with her responses.

I had been keeping my eyes down through the meal; I looked up and regretted it immediately. There bright red and big as ever was the love bite I have Xe last night. I slammed my eyes back on my plate. My face coloring with embarrassment at knowing I had created that mark. I quickly finished my toast and excused myself to my room, even though I knew Xe would follow me. She entered my room closing the door with a soft click. “Are you alright?”

I turned towards her. “No. Look at your neck. You must think I'm a huge slut after last night.” I wanted to step back when she came towards me but my legs were rooted in place. She placed her hands on my upper arms. “There's no way in this world I'd think you're a slut. You did nothing wrong. You only showed your affection for me. It'll go away in a couple days.”

I fell into her embrace, letting her hold me as my emotions threatened to tumble me over. “Xe I don't know what I'm feeling anymore. One moment I'm happy and the next I'm filled with anxiety.” She didn't respond, just continued to caress my back. “Your parents asked me to house sit with you this weekend. Would you mind if I joined you?” I looked up at her and told her that I'd enjoy it if she joined me. It was settled then; Xe and I would have the house to ourselves this weekend.

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The week leading up to the weekend was thankfully a pleasant one. Aries hadn't bothered me this past week, instead he seemed to be interested in Xe now. My territorial instincts would kick in when I'd catch him eyeing my girl. I just wanted to pound his face in. Xe was right about the hickey, it did go away pretty quickly. I missed seeing it when it was gone.

I woke up Friday morning to receive a brief on emergency phone numbers and how I could reach my parents if I needed them for anything. I was told the usual “No parties and to be safe” speech. Finally Xe showed up to take me to school. I didn't let her get out of the lecture; I recited my parent's speech to her on the way.

Through out the day I couldn't stop thinking about what might happen this weekend. Surprisingly enough I was looking forward to it. Hell I was fantasying about it. By the time my final class rolled around I couldn't sit still. I just wanted to get to my house and tackle Xe.

During class I placed my hand on Xe's thigh, rubbing suggestively every now and then. Once or twice she had to place her hand on top of mine to stop my hand's motion. I just turned and smiled at her. Another thing I noticed was that Aries seemed to be in a foul mood. He kept glaring at Xe and me. I didn't play him much attention I had much more important subjects on my mind. No that's not true I only had one subject on my mind, Xe.

I nearly ran to Xe's car when the bell rang at the end of class. The second we were inside my house, I pressed Xe against the front door, my lips sealed to hers. I reached around her and locked the door. Breaking the kiss I took her hand and led her up to my room.

I stepped away from Xe and stood facing her in the center of the room. Xe pulled her shirt off as she made her way towards me. I'm amazed I didn't have drool running down my chin from the way I was looking at her now bra covered chest. I wrapped my arms around her neck, pressing myself against her. I placed a soft kiss to the side of her throat. “You smell real good.” I nuzzled in closer to her sweet smelling skin.

Xe's hands were on my lower back massaging as she slowly inched my shirt out of my jeans. Heat coursed up my spine when she placed her hands on my bare back. “Can I take it off?” Xe asked as her hands grasped the hem of my shirt. I nodded my compliance. She leaned back and lifted my shirt up over my head, tossing it into a corner. I stood still as she ran her eyes over me

Xe placed my arms around her neck as she brought our bodies close together. She had just touched her lips to mine when the phone started ringing. I didn't want to answer it, somehow I found the will power to pull myself away from Xe and answer it. My mother's voice greeted me, I listened or tried to as she rattled on about where she was and how she could be reached if I needed her for any reason.

My attention wasn't on her, I was watching as Xe removed her boots, socks, and jeans. I reached down and took my shoes off not taking my gaze off my boxer clad beauty. Muttering some sort of a goodbye I hung up the phone. I went to unfasten my jeans, when Xe's hands covered my own. “Let me.” I watched as her skillful fingers shed me of my pants in no time.

Now we were both down to our last two pieces of clothing. I stood stone still as her eyes roamed my body from head to toe. I told her I was nervous when she made eye contact again. She stepped close to me and gave me a kiss that took my breath away, ending it by telling me that at anytime if I wanted her to stop, she would. After receiving that kiss I found stopping a very remote possibility.

Xe sat down on the edge of my bed and leaned back. I took my favorite position on her lap and dove for her neck. I didn't want this to be slow so I went with my instincts and let my hands go where they wanted. Sure enough Xe's bra was on the floor in no time. My mouth traveled across her chest, lavishing attention to the gentle rise of her breasts. My hands kneaded their soft mass as my lips slid further down to play among the valley between the two. My cheeks being caressed as my hands molded them.

I explored further as I made my way over to the peak of her breast. I stayed for long joyous moments learning every texture of her breasts. I must had been doing something right because Xe took one of my hands and slowly guided it down into her boxers. My fingertips met soft curly hair. Her hand took mine further into the boxers where my fingers encountered smooth slick, moist, heated skin. Electricity seemed to ripple throughout my entire body at that first touch. Xe's fingers directed mine on where to go and what to do. I must have been a quick study because she took her hand away and placed it behind her head.

I kept up my ministrations, enjoying the reactions I was receiving from Xe. Xe's body went stiff under me; I continued my motions till she stopped me. I nearly died from the sight of her cleaning my hand with her mouth. She looked at me with a smile that melted my soul.

I lay down on the bed not breaking eye contact. Xe kneeled at my feet, her hands resting on my ankles. I watched as she bent down placing her lips to my calf. Lifting my leg she peppered my skin with kisses. When she reached my panties, she retreated to my other ankle. She delivered the same attention to that leg as she had the other. This time when she reached my underwear, hooked her fingers in the waist band and drew them off my body.

I shivered as the cool air met my heated skin. She took her boxers off letting them join the rest of our clothes on the floor. Xe slid up between my parted legs. Letting our skin touch, I couldn't stop my hips from bucking. Xe started a slow grind against me. I closed my eyes as she removed my bra and lay fully on top of me.

I felt her lips touch mine as her hand cupped my breast. Her mouth found my throat while her other hand traveled down to the triangle of hair between my legs. My skin felt like Xe was caressing every inch of it. Her fingers were turning my blood to fire as they worked their magic. Almost immediately, Xe was tracing my most intimate area. All I could do was moan and widen my legs, letting my eagerness show. I cried out at the slight pain her fingers penetrating my core caused.

Xe was gentle with me as she began to move within me. In no time I was rolling my hips and clinging to her. We laid there in a tangled heap as we caught our breath. I stared at the ceiling tiles as Xe curled around my side. Before my mind could wander too far, Xe spoke asking if I was alright. I looked down at her giving a small smile before saying that I was fine.

I slid out of bed with Xe looking at me with a questioning look. “I'm going to make dinner.” Xe placed her hands behind her head, leaning back on the pillows. “And you're going to help.” She raised her eyebrow at that, but got out of bed anyway.

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The rest of the weekend was the best in my life. We spent every minute together. In the morning I'd wake up being held in Xe's arms. In the evenings we'd curl up on the couch to watch movies. Of course most of our time was spent making love, morning, noon, and night. We did things I had only heard other girls talk about in the locker room. I can't remember a time I had been so truly happy.

I didn't want this weekend to end. I wanted time to stand still so Xe and I could live for eternity in complete happiness. I feared Monday. I had a sinking feeling in the pit of my stomach. I knew something awful would happen on Monday. I dreaded its sunrise. For surely no couple is allowed to be as happy as Xe and I without some sort of consequences.

Monday morning I woke tightly wrapped around Xe. We were nearly late due to our morning love making. I wish I had chosen to skip school that day. The second I stepped foot on the property, the rumors hit my ears. I hate what happened that day. I let the rumors, which were true now, getting under my skin. Tarnishing everything that Xe and I had, making it ugly and disgusting.

By the end of the day I couldn't even look at the one I had found so beautiful that very morning. Xe knew something was wrong. Every time she went to touch me, I would jerk away and say some lame excuse to be away from her. The ride home was torture for me. I couldn't stop fidgeting.

Thankfully Xe didn't want to talk. I wonder why that was. When we arrived at my house Xe closed the door behind me asking me to tell he what was wrong. I exploded on her, screaming and yelling at her. Blaming her for what happened over the weekend. Telling her she had ruined my life. She stood calmly not saying a word. Not even trying to defend herself against my verbal battery.

I did see though that my words were causing her pain. Her eyes showed every ounce of agony. Still she uttered no type of a response. I continued to berate her, ending by yelling at her to get out of my life. She stood silent for a moment before muttering one word. “Fine.” The front door clicked shut and Xe was gone.

I fell to the floor in a crying heap. Through my entire tirade I had only been yelling at myself. It hurt unbearably to know I had just drove the one person who made me truly happy out of my life because I wasn't strong enough to admit I was with another woman. I was so pitiful. I didn't deserve Xe's love. I was too weak. She deserved someone much better than me.

I moped around the house the remainder of the day. Finally around three in the morning, as I lay in my bed, my spirits lifted. I could call Xe in the morning and apologize. I needed to explain that I was scared and needed time to adjust, but I wanted her in my life to help with my adjusting. With a plan set I finally fell asleep.

The next morning as I walked across campus, the other student's stares and whispers didn't penetrate my defenses. Let them spread rumors. They were just jealous of what Xe and I had. They would never know the depth of love I had for Xe. I planned on telling her how much love I had for her when I apologized for my previous days actions.

Unfortunately Xe was absent. I couldn't help feeling guilty for her absence. I know my outburst had hurt her but I didn't expect her to skip school due to it. Now my plea for forgiveness would have to wait till this afternoon. Another peculiar thing I noticed was that “Mr. Perfect” Aries wasn't in school. I have to be honest and say I was relieved, I didn't' need his annoying presence today.

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I arrived home to my mother seating me down across from a police officer in our living room. I eyed the young woman with suspicion. She introduced herself as Detective Hockley and that she had some questions that she wanted to ask me. I say quietly as she began by asking if I knew a Xena Milnome.

My brain began to race from that first question. Of course I know Xe, but I couldn't come up with a reason for why a detective was asking about Xe. Had Xe committed some sort of crime after I drove her away yesterday? Detective Hockley's next inquiry sent a chill to my bones. “Do you know anyone who would want to do harm to Miss Milnome?”

I took a moment to answer, thinking over the past few months that I had known Xe. I couldn't come up with a single person. I told Detective Hockley that Xe usually was always with me. That she didn't seem to have any other friends. At least she didn't go out with them.

Pinching the bridge of her nose Detective Hockley took a deep breath and told me the most heart breaking news of my short life. Last night around 9:00pm, on a dark back road Xena “Xe” Milnome was raped and beaten to death after being run off the road. The police were in the process of apprehending the assailant. Detective Hockley informed me that her last words on the way to the hospital were my name.

I fell to the floor in hysterics, crying, ranting that she couldn't be dead that I still have to tell her I love her. That we were supposed to live out a perfect life together. Detective Hockley told my mother that she would do everything in her ability to find the person responsible for this tragic crime.

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