Love at Long Last
by Sandie
Disclaimer: The characters of Xena, Gabrielle and Eve are not mine. They belong to Renaissance Pictures, MCA, Studios USA, etc. I'm simply borrowing them for awhile. This story contains spoilers from season five.
Sexual Disclaimer: This story deals with a deep, loving friendship which will eventually become much more. Some very explicit scenes could be contained in this story. If you are under 18 or if this type of thing is illegal where you live, stop reading now! If the thought of a sexual relationship between two women bothers you, too bad. You're in the wrong place.
Xena is sitting, staring at the gorgeous features and eyes of the bard, wondering 'how in the name of the gods am I ever going to show her how much she means to me. How can I possibly explain to her the pain that I feel over killing her? It was instinct, pure reaction. How will she ever forgive me? She has yet to remember those few horrible hours that to me seemed to last a lifetime. Gods, I love her so much! What will I do if she decides to leave? I can't think about that now. All I can think about is how to make it up to her.'
Gabrielle, who has been trying to concentrate on her scrolls, looks up to see a perplexed look on the face of the woman she has grown to love more than life itself. She notices a single tear running down the raven-haired beauty's cheek and reaches up to brush it away.
Just at that moment, Xena realizes that Gabrielle is looking at her and flinches as if just the touch of the bard's fingers will burn her. Gabrielle gets "the look" on her face, sorrowful and full of hurt. 'What's going on? Since when can I not even touch her?' wonders the bard.
"Xena, what's wrong? And don't tell me nothing. I know better, and we have been through too much to keep secrets from each other now." 'Maybe she's still upset that I tried to kill her daughter, but she knows that wasn't me, that was the furies, and she said that she forgave me, even though I haven't yet quite forgiven myself. Gods, what am I going to do?' Gabrielle realizes at that moment that if she didn't soon tell Xena what she was thinking and feeling, she was going to drive herself crazy.
Xena looks at the hurt expression on her friend's face and decides that it is time to finally bare her soul, she just isn't sure of how to go about it. "Gabrielle, I..."
"Xena, I think we need to talk...I'm sorry, what were you going to say?"
"It's ok, Gabrielle, I think you just read my mind again. How do you do that anyway?"
"Must be a bard thing, or maybe it has something to do with being Artemis's chosen for so long. Who knows." 'Or maybe it's because I'm so in love with you that I watch your every move. I know what you're going to say before you do, because I recognize the shifts in your eyes, your body...gods that body. What am I thinking? Get a grip girl!' Gabrielle couldn't believe she was having these thoughts again. What would Xena think of her? She knew that Xena couldn't possibly think that after all this time she was still the innocent little girl from Potadaeia, but she really hadn't been able to get close in THAT way with anyone.
Xena thought that she had seen a look of desire cross over the bard's features, but dismissed it as wishful thinking. After all, Gabrielle was very beautiful, and she had been the queen of the Amazons, surely she must have fulfilled some of her needs sometime. Xena was sure that Gabrielle thought of her as nothing more than her best friend. What could she possibly have to offer the bard? Death...pain...what would happen if she ever gave into her instincts again? She had killed most of the gods, leaving only Aphrodite and Ares.
She was sure that Aphrodite would not be in a big hurry to help her after she had killed nearly her entire family; and Ares, well, Ares was no longer a god, having given up his godhood to save the lives of both Eve and Gabrielle. For a brief moment she wondered what kind of trouble Ares was getting himself into...wait a minute...why should she care? He'd been a pain in the ass for a long time, and just because he said that he loved her, there was no way she was going to start feeling sorry for him now.
"Xena, like I said, we need to talk. Do you think we could go somewhere a little more private?" Gabrielle asked, motioning towards the form of Xena's sleeping daughter over in the corner of the cave.
"Sure, just let me get us a blanket. Don't want you catching your death out there in the cold." 'Geez, what am I thinking? Why don't I just come right out and say 'Gabrielle, I know that I killed you and everything, but I still am going to order you around.' Like I have any right.'
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Once they finally found a nice, quiet place by the edge of a nearby stream, the two friends both started to talk at once again. "Gabrielle, I..."
"Xena, do you..."
"Gabrielle, I know you're the one who is the better of the two of us at talking, but do you mind if I go first? There's something I really need to tell you, and if I wait, I may not." 'Well, here goes everything.' She thought for a moment and then just said it. "Gabrielle, I know you've been wondering what happened after you stabbed Eve..."
"Xena, I don't know how many times I can apologize for that..."
"Gab, just listen to me, ok? I don't blame you for what happened. I blame myself. I should have noticed that something wasn't right. Anyway, I walked into the room, and saw you standing there, and I just reacted. I threw my chakram at you...there was so much blood...I didn't even think. I'm so sorry. If you want to leave, I wouldn't blame you, but please just stop and think about what you would have done." With that last statement, Xena broke down into sobs, unable to hold them back any longer.
Gabrielle sat there, not blinking, not reacting. She couldn't believe what she had heard. "Xena, you killed me?"
"Gabrielle, I'm so sorry. If I had stopped to think, even for just a second, I..."
Suddenly, Gabrielle came back to her senses. "Xena, I'm not going to tell you that it's ok. It's not...but you have forgiven me for trying to kill your daughter, and you were just trying to protect her. No, Xena, I'm not going to leave you..." 'How could I, because I will never be able to live without you.' She realized too late that she had spoken this last part aloud as well. She looked up slowly into eyes staring so intently at her that she thought she might pass out from the rush of blood to her face. She noticed, with much embarrassment, that the blood was also rushing to the center of her every desire.
"Gabrielle, I know that you don't think that you could live without me, but you are much older and able to care of yourself now. You can handle yourself in a battle almost as well as I can. Gods, there are some days that I think you could beat me in a fight."
Well, thought Gabrielle, it's now or never. "Xena, that's not quite what I meant. I mean, <SIGH> I am totally and utterly in love with you. I can't live without you because every moment spent away from you causes my heart to ache. I have loved you for so long that I can't even remember when it started. Please don't hate me. I know that you don't feel the same way, but Xena, I just had to tell you. I couldn't go on like this anymore...stealing glances at you when you weren't looking...watching you while you sleep..."
The rest of Gabrielle's words were nothing more than muffled sounds as the warrior grabbed her and seized her lips in a kiss that threatened to burn them both alive. Finally, as their lips parted, both of them sucking in some much needed air, Gabrielle noticed the beginning of a smile cross the warrior's features.
"Gabrielle, you are my entire world. I have wanted to do that for so long, but I was afraid. Afraid you would reject me, or think me disgusting because I'm a woman..."
"Xena, how could you ever possibly think that? I was an Amazon Queen, remember? Do you forget how many of my sisters were lovers? Besides, how could I possibly reject you? After all, you are and always will be the love of my life."
With that said, she grabbed hold of the warrior and planted a firm and passionate kiss on her lips, allowing herself to release a tiny moan at the contact. To her surprise, she found herself lying on her back with the warrior's body covering hers. When she finally managed to pull away and catch her breath, she looked into the deep blue eyes of her soon to be lover, and was amazed at the desire and passion she saw there.
"Gabrielle, are you sure that you want this. If not, tell me now, because if I let this go much further, I may not be able to stop."
"Xena, I want this more than anything I've ever wanted in my whole life...I'm just not sure what to do..." She stopped when she saw another smile cross Xena's face. She didn't want the warrior to laugh at her. "Xena, what is so funny?"
"Nothing, my sweet bard...I just thought that you must have come into contact with one of your Amazon sisters..."
"No, never...Xena, I've never made love to anyone..." Lowering her eyes in shame, she added, "not even Perdicus on our wedding night. He was very kind and everything, but when I started to feel the heat rising, I closed my eyes, and all I could do was imagine that it was you. I sort of put a complete stop on things when suddenly I moaned out your name." She blushed then, realizing how good it felt to finally say it out loud.
"Gabrielle, I... if you will let me, I would like to be your first. Let me teach you...show you what you do to me..."
And with that Xena brought her lips to the dip in her lovers neck, just above the collarbone. The response to this contact was a deep moan from the smaller woman. "Gods Xena...that feels so-o-o-o good." That was all the encouragement that Xena needed as she gently lowered Gabrielle onto her back. Her fingers fumbled with the bard's top. 'This would have been so much easier with the laces on that damn green top of hers, but this one is just so much more appealing,' she thought, releasing a slight chuckle.
Gabrielle just looked at her and asked, "What's with the chuckle, my dear warrior? I didn't realize that this was supposed to be funny."
"I was just thinking about your old green top and how much easier it would have been to remove...but, don't get me wrong, this one is VERY nice."
"Here, let me help." With that, Gabrielle removed her clothing in the blink of an eye. "Now, warrior, you are still wearing WAY too much. I think I'll remedy that right now." She removed Xena's leathers and shift with such ease and skill that the warrior gave her a strange look. "Hey, I may not have taken them off for this reason before, but I have helped you undress before...besides, I've dreamt about this moment for a long time, and now you are making my dreams come true."
"And you, mine. Now, where was I?"
"I think you were right about here," said Gabrielle, pointing towards her newly exposed breasts. "So, shall we continue with my lessons, oh great warrior princess?"
"Gabrielle," growled the warrior, "I think I like this silly side of you."
That growl went straight to the blonde's core, and when Xena touched her again she felt herself melting at her touch. The warrior was bringing out feelings in her that she had only dreamed were possible. "Xena, please, I need to feel you," she moaned.
That was all Xena needed to hear, and she brought her lips first to Gabrielle's neck and then spread her kisses and hands lower to the smaller woman's breasts. She took one nipple into her mouth, teasing it with her tongue, causing it to pucker. Not wanting the other breast to feel neglected, she played with the nipple between her thumb and forefinger, arousing it as well. She let her other hand draw small circles and lines along the bard's abdomen, down as far as the small patch of blond curls, where it came to rest. She looked into Gabrielle's eyes to make sure that this was what she really wanted. All she got in return was a look, and a moaned, "please."
She let her lips trail down across Gabrielle's stomach, and then to the inside of her thigh, where she licked, kissed, and nipped playfully, eliciting a whole new set of whimpers and moans from Gabrielle. This only served to excite Xena even more. She wrapped her lips around Gabrielle's swollen bud and circled it with her tongue, while spreading the folds of her lovers sex with her fingers. She inserted one finger into Gabrielle and found the thin lining that was the last of her virginity. She didn't want to hurt her, so she very gently pushed through the lining and looked up to see a look of pain pass very quickly over Gabrielle's face, to be replaced seconds later by a look of pure passion. She inserted another finger and started a slow steady rhythm inside the bard. It didn't take long too increase the pace, and Gabrielle's hips began to rise off the blanket to meet her thrusts.
Gabrielle was starting to feel things she had only heard whispered about in the amazon village. She was getting very warm all over, like she had had too much ale to drink. Wave after wave of warmth were crashing over on top of one another, and then she lost all track of her thoughts as one giant wave of ecstasy overcame her, sending her body into uncontrollable tremors and shudders. She found that she was having a hard time breathing, but as her breathing and her thoughts came back to her, she realized that she was crying and Xena was holding her tight, asking her if she was okay. "I'm fine. I just have never felt anything like that in my whole life. I think I actually went to Elysia for a minute there."
Xena was so happy to find out that Gabrielle was all right, and was completely surprised to find herself being flipped onto her back with the bard straddling her. A wicked smile crossed Gabrielle's face as she said, "Now my warrior, it's payback time. You've heard the term payback's a bitch right?"
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The two lovers spent the evening pleasuring each other in ways that they never though possible, and when their bodies were too worn out to possibly do anything else, they lay in each other's arms, staring into eyes hooded with exhaustion and desire. Xena never knew it could be like this. She had never loved anyone the way that she loved Gabrielle. She had had many sexual partners in the past, but she now realized that she had never really loved any of them, not even Marcus or Lao Ma. With that thought, she decided to ask the young amazon queen a question that had been burning in her mind the entire night. "Gabrielle, I know that this is all very new to you, and I know that although we have both done things in the past that neither of us is proud of but, gods how do I say this, I love you more than life itself and would be honoured if you would join with me in an amazon bonding ceremony, and allow me to be your consort, as well as your champion for all times."
Gabrielle looked at her in shock. She never expected those words to be coming out of Xena's mouth. "Of course I will. You've made me the happiest woman in Greece. I love you with every fibre of my being, and I would be honoured to marry you."
"No, Gabrielle, you are only the second happiest. Now, come on, let's go back before our daughter wakes up and wonders where we are. We wouldn't want her to come looking for us and find us like this."
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Eve woke up just as the two women entered the cave and was puzzled by the looks on the faces of her mother and friend. "Mother, Gabrielle, what's going on?" They had been so quiet since their trip to Mt. Olympus, and she was beginning to think that things would never be the same as the way things were in the scrolls that Gabrielle had written.
"Well, Gabrielle, do you think we should tell her?"
"Tell me what, mother? Would somebody please, for Eli's sake, please tell me what's happening? Where have you been?"
"Eve, honey," began Gabrielle, "I don't know how to tell you this." Eve suddenly thought that they were going to tell her that Gabrielle was leaving them. She couldn't let that happen, not because of her. "Eve, your mother and I are going to be married."
"Oh, Mother, Gabrielle, I'm so happy for you both. When did this happen? Why am I not surprised. I could tell for as soon as I met you, well, you know what I mean, that the two of you were in love. I was really surprised that it took you both this long to figure it out."
"Well, Eve, we have figured it out. Now, you, Gabrielle and I will finally be a family. Well, I don't know about you two, but I could really use some sleep. Care to join me, my love?"
"Sounds like Elysia, warrior mine."
The two women laid their bedrolls down in the far corner of the cave, lay down together, and dreamed of the days to come.
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Well, what did you think of this, my first ever fan fiction, or for that matter my first fiction of any kind. Please let me know what you thought. You can write to me at randyp@nbnet.nb.ca