The
Nightmare Scrolls
by Cath,
Bard
OWNERSHIP DISCLAIMER
The characters of Xena and
Gabrielle and others belong in their entirety to Universal/MCA, Renaissance
Pictures, and all the other powers that be.
No copyright infringement is intended.
I wrote this story at the urging of my muse; it should never be used for
profit. Please do not copy or cite
elsewhere without express permission of the author.
VIOLENCE
This story contains scenes of
violence and/or their aftermath.
LOVE/SEX WARNING/DISCLAIMER:
This story depicts a loving
friendship between two consenting adult women. If you are under 18 years of age
or if this type of story is illegal in the state or country in which you live,
please do not read it. If depictions of this nature disturb you, you may wish
to read something other than this story.
Contains many Season 5
spoilers.
THANKS
To Kamouraskan and Heather for
their edits and suggestions and to the wonderful people who visit the Tavern
Wall, where this tale was first shared.
The look on Lila’s face as
she opened the door told Xena something was wrong – very wrong.
“Thank the gods!” Hecuba
exclaimed as Xena strode into the room.
“What is it? Where is Gabrielle?” The Warrior fought to control the fear and
apprehension filling her gut. Xena’s thoughts immediately turned to her beloved
Bard.
Before Hecuba could answer,
Lila spoke up.
“Xena, it’s about Gabrielle…”
The tall woman moved toward
the door to the room that Lila and Gabrielle once shared. Instinctively, she knew the Bard was there.
Lila stepped in front of
Xena, cutting her off. Tears glistened
on the girl’s cheeks. Xena noted
Hecuba’s tearstained visage as well. She
stopped and took a deep breath.
“What happened?” she inquired
in her gentlest tone, gazing over Lila’s shoulder toward the door. She ached to cross into that room and find
Gabrielle, but she knew that Hecuba and Lila needed to prepare her.
Lila looked up into the deep
blue eyes of her sister’s mate.
”It all started just after
you left for Amphipolis,” she began...
Xena and Gabrielle had
come to Potidaea to recover from the beating they had taken at the hands of
Mavican, a vicious, second-rate warrior intent on replacing Xena as Ares’
favorite.
Ares pitted Warrior
Princess and Bard against Mavican in a deserted world of his own creation. He merged Xena and Gabrielle into one being.
Xena battled Mavican by day, but at night Gabrielle shifted into the body they
shared. The Bard acquitted herself well
against Mavican, but not before she sustained some painful wounds.
During
the contest, Ares revealed his true purpose: To determine Gabrielle’s worth as
Xena’s successor. When Gabrielle proved
herself, Ares offered her the mantle once reserved for the Warrior Princess. Gabrielle rejected him – to Xena’s delighted
relief.
Although the Bard insisted
she was fine, Xena decided that her wounds were serious enough to require some
recovery time. Despite Gabrielle’s
protests, Xena insisted on Potidaea.
Her parents and sister needed to know that Gabrielle was alive. The women did not share the tale of their
resurrection – only that they had survived Caesar’s attempt to crucify them and
now needed nothing more than to rest.
When Xena felt certain
that Gabrielle was comfortable and recovering from their ordeal, she journeyed
to Amphipolis to let her own mother, Cyrene, know that everything was all
right.
Xena had been gone just
three weeks. Despite a joyous reunion
with Cyrene, the separation seemed endless.
She longed for her companion and headed back to Potidaea with a full
heart.
Lila’s voice beckoned Xena to
the present.
“Gabrielle started writing
again, only I never saw her like this.
She’d work on those scrolls late into the night. She refused to eat… wouldn’t go out, except
to visit the tavern and tell her stories.
She’d come home late… I could tell she had been drinking. You know it
doesn’t take much for her…”
Xena smiled despite her
trepidation. Gabrielle and wine…
Gabrielle and nutbread… Gabrielle inebriated with the beauty of life.
Hecuba picked up Lila’s
story.
“We tried to send word to you
in Amphipolis. Hector had to leave for
Corinth and she was getting harder to handle…”
“I probably just missed the
messenger,” Xena offered. “I need to
see her now.”
Her tone told them that
further explanation would have to wait.
Lila stepped aside and Xena
entered Gabrielle’s room. Nothing had
prepared her for what she found there.
The Bard lay on a narrow bed,
unconscious -- her breathing shallow. Dark circles rimmed her eyes, contrasting starkly with her pale
cheeks. Her short, blonde hair was
matted with dirt and sweat.
A fresh bandage covered the
wound on her left shoulder, but Xena saw the red streaks that trailed down the
woman's arm, almost to her wrist.
She wore a mud-stained man's
vest and breeches. Gashes and scrapes crisscrossed her bare feet.
"Why didn't you do
something?" Xena almost growled at
Hecuba and Lila as they followed her into the room.
Hecuba answered firmly.
"We found her just a
candlemark before you got here, Xena."
"What?" Xena was puzzled.
"She disappeared three
days ago," Hecuba responded in a quiet voice, her anxiety barely
controlled. "Just walked
away. No boots. We tried to stop her, but she threatened
herself with those weapons she carries.
The search party found her this morning, in a cave, in the hills outside
of town. She was this way when they
brought her in."
The Bard's mother rubbed her
forehead with a strong, weathered hand.
The Warrior Princess felt
overwhelmed. This was not at all the
Gabrielle she knew and loved.
Xena moved to her companion's
side.
"Hey, Gabrielle,"
she whispered. She brushed aside a lock
of damp, blonde hair. The wound on
Gabrielle's forehead blazed scarlet.
Xena shook off her feelings
and took charge.
"Let's finish cleaning
her up, then I need to hear the whole story."
Lila helped Xena cut away
Gabrielle's clothing while Hecuba brought the water she had been heating to
bathe her daughter.
The Warrior winced at the
sight of the young woman's bruised, emaciated body, revealed in the afternoon
light. Lila looked as if she would be
sick.
"This doesn't just
happen in a few weeks," Xena thought.
She suspected godly intervention.
They washed Gabrielle and dressed
her in a clean sleeping shift. Xena
settled her soulmate in bed, planting a tender kiss upon the Bard's pallid
cheek. Then, the Warrior asked Lila to bring the scrolls.
"At first, she didn't
want to share the stories. I caught her
trying to burn them, but I saved these from the fire."
Lila placed an armful of
charred, wrinkled scrolls on the table near Xena's chair.
"After awhile, though,
it was like she didn't care. She'd
finish one, crumple it, and toss it across the room. Next moment, she'd start another." Lila shrugged, then looked sadly at her sister's still form.
Xena dragged a chair to
Gabrielle’s bedside. The Bard's
breathing had become less labored and the poultices prepared by Xena and Hecuba
were already draining the infection from the wounds at her forehead and
shoulder. Assured that Gabrielle rested peacefully for now, Xena selected a
scroll, smoothed it out on her lap, and began reading.
In her first scroll, the Bard
of Potidaea described how Eli, mystic and friend, had healed them after their
crucifixion. Involuntarily, Xena
shuddered at the images of Gabrielle nailed to the cross beside her, and all
that they had endured in heaven and hell.
Then, she remembered how her friend had fought an entire Roman garrison
to protect her…
"Ah, Gabrielle,"
Xena sighed to the gathering darkness.
The second scroll told of the monumental battle with the war gods, Ares
and Kal, for possession of a god-killing chakram. So far, Gabrielle was simply describing recent events with her
special flair.
Gabrielle's third piece,
titled Succession, recounted their confrontation with Mavican. Xena noticed that the Bard downplayed her
temptation by Ares during that adventure.
From Gabrielle's verbal account, Xena knew that the god of war had
pressured the young woman relentlessly.
Ares had designs on Gabrielle almost from the moment Eli resurrected
her. Perhaps this explained why the Bard had such skill with her sais, the new
weapons she had originally purchased for Xena.
Gabrielle increased those skills with ceaseless practice during their
travels, but her original "awakening" was a cruel gift from Ares.
During her confinement, Ares
had shown Gabrielle the power she would wield if she took Xena's place as his
chosen warrior. He attempted to seduce
her. When she spurned him, he grew even more insistent, determined to make her
his, or at least force Xena to return to him to save her Bard. His efforts ended when Xena and Gabrielle defeated
Mavican and Gabrielle chose not to kill the wannabe warrior.
As Gabrielle had described
Ares' temptation, Xena realized just how fortunate they were that her friend
had rejected his offer. Strangely, the
Bard chose to omit these details from her scrolls. This puzzled the Warrior Princess, but she was interrupted before
she could ponder further.
The Bard stirred and moaned
softly. Xena and Lila managed to get
her to drink a strong herbal tea laced with powdered willow bark.
“C’mon, Gabrielle,” Xena
urged, hoping to bring the young woman around.
Without opening her eyes or
uttering a word, Gabrielle slipped again into unconsciousness.
Xena noticed Lila's tired,
worried expression.
"Get some rest,"
she commanded gently. "I'll call you if there's any change."
Lila nodded gratefully and
left the room.
By the light of a candle, at
her beloved's bedside, the Warrior Princess continued to review the scrolls
that had become the Bard's obsession. In them, she hoped to find a clue that
would return Gabrielle to her.
Up through the Succession piece,
Gabrielle pretty much detailed all that had happened since their crucifixion.
However, the fourth scroll caught Xena by surprise. It began inauspiciously enough.
Xena, Gabrielle, Joxer, and Americe rescued a horse from a trap. Gabrielle tamed the steed and decided to
keep him as her own. (Upon reading this, Xena made a mental note to find a
suitable mount for the young woman.)
Then, Gabrielle's narrative
took an unexpected turn.
In her fourth scroll,
Gabrielle wrote of how the Warrior Princess learned that she was pregnant. Xena found herself pleased and happy about
this event – even though she admitted there was no way a man could have
fathered the child. The Warrior shook
her head in amazement as she read the Bard’s description of her as a “love free
zone.” That was far from reality – although a woman, not a man, graced her
life.
“Bless you, love,” thought
Xena, recalling the emptiness that followed the loss of Solan, her son. “I wish the same for you.”
The remaining scrolls
detailed myriad adventures. A particularly poignant story described Eli’s death
at Ares’ hands. Most interestingly,
Gabrielle wrote about the Twilight of the Gods – a legend that she and Xena had
sometimes discussed.
In the subsequent tales, Xena
discovered that her infant was a gift from Callisto via the “one god” of
Michael, the Archangel. Further, this
child heralded the demise of the Greek gods – The Twilight. The gods pursued Xena, bent on killing her
baby to prevent their downfall, but Xena eluded them. Hercules and Gabrielle protected the Warrior during the birth of
her child – a daughter she named Eve.
By the candle’s glow, Xena
observed how the Bard’s handwriting degenerated to a desperate scrawl as she
completed the later scrolls. Still, nothing in the stories provided the clue
Xena needed to restore her friend’s health.
The Warrior read on through
the night. The candle burned to a nub,
and her red-rimmed eyes ached with tears and weariness.
The final works in the series
found Warrior and Bard entombed by Ares in an ice cave to protect them from the
gods seeking vengeance for the twilight.
The women awakened to a strange world, 25 years into the future, yet no
older than they were at the time Ares hid them. Xena’s child, Eve, was now a ruthless Roman leader, obsessed with
persecuting the followers of Eli.
After several more incidents,
including the death of their friend Joxer, Xena managed to redeem Eve, then
confronted the gods in an all-out battle.
During this final conflict, Athena used the Furies to turn Gabrielle
against Eve. When the Bard stabbed Xena’s
daughter, the Warrior unleashed her deadly chakram against her soulmate,
striking a mortal blow. Only Are’s
sacrifice of his immortality saved Gabrielle and Eve.
Stunned by Gabrielle’s words,
Xena glanced over at her companion.
“Does she really believe I
would do such a thing?” the Warrior Princess asked aloud to the darkness. “Would I destroy the woman who means my very
life for the sake of my child?”
In that moment, Xena faced the terrifying depths of her dark side. She realized her deadly fierceness in
defense of what was hers – her child, her Bard. Her capacity for revenge knew no bounds. Memories of how she had punished Gabrielle
for Solan’s death flowed back; how she had compelled Gabrielle to kill her own
daughter, and intended to slaughter Hope herself – even before the unholy child
murdered Xena’s only son.
“Oh gods! I could do that, even now.” The Warrior acknowledged the beast that
lurked just beneath her outer layer of control.
Did Gabrielle’s tale express
a deep-rooted fear of Xena? Or was the
Bard punishing herself for past transgressions -- again? The Warrior felt a headache coming on.
Then, she recalled
Gabrielle’s gentle, sweet admonishment when someone once tried to overanalyze
one of her yarns: “Hey, sometimes a
story is just a story.”
Xena smiled sadly in the
darkness and began to roll up the scrolls.
The damp, grey dawn cast an
eerie light into Gabrielle’s room.
Roused from her half-sleep, Xena opened ice-blue eyes and studied the
ashen countenance of the woman she loved.
Another pair of eyes,
sparkling green, returned the gaze. Was
their glimmer a sign of recovery, or madness?
Gabrielle’s first words
answered Xena’s question.
"Gotta write," the
Bard whispered in breathless desperation.
She tossed off the covers and
started to rise. A firm hand on her
shoulder stopped her abruptly.
"What do you think
you're doing?" Gabrielle glared up
at the Warrior Princess.
"Relax, Gabrielle,"
Xena commanded, forcing the compact blonde flat on the bed.
"You don't
understand…."
Xena sensed an insane
strength as the Bard struggled beneath her arm.
"Please, my
love."
The Warrior Princess braced
herself and pinned the other woman with her body.
"Whatever this is, we'll
see it through together, but you can't shut me out." Despite her use of force, Xena kept her
voice gentle, soothing.
"I have to write another
story, just one more."
The Bard ceased struggling
and looked up at the Warrior with a pleading expression - childlike, yet not
quite sincere.
Xena detected the ploy.
"I will tie you down
there if necessary. Make no mistake.
You're killing yourself with this obsession."
"You don't
understand," Gabrielle responded. Her effort had taken its toll. She
appeared exhausted, defeated.
"Trust me," Xena
ordered softly.
The Bard's eyes brimmed with
tears. She blinked a few times, then
spoke.
"It's just that…"
She broke off and covered her mouth with her hand. "I can't tell; mustn't tell."
"Can't tell me
what?" Xena probed the depths of
those emerald eyes.
"Nothing, "I'm tired. Please just leave me alone." She tried again to rise, but Xena held her.
"No. Not until you let me know what's going
on."
"Xena, if I could, I'd
tell you everything, but I can't. I
just have to write."
At that moment, the Warrior
understood Gabrielle’s plight. The Bard
was fighting for her sanity.
"Why?"
"Don't ask. Please don't."
Xena decided to risk a direct
approach.
"Look at yourself. You're a mess. You've lost weight. You
need a bath. Your face reminds me of the road to Amphipolis on market day. And I was gone less than a cycle of the
moon."
Gabrielle flashed the hint of
a smile.
"Forget it,
Warrior. If you think flattery will
work…"
Xena made her first
mistake. She relaxed.
With a swift, graceful
motion, Gabrielle rolled to the other side of the bed and onto her feet. Xena
rose to confront her.
As the Warrior Princess
approached, the Bard smiled, and waited.
Suddenly, the smaller woman
grabbed a pitcher from the bedside table and smashed it against her companion's
upper arm.
Xena reeled back; more
surprised than hurt. Gabrielle saw her
opening and dashed from the room, exiting the house as Lila and Hecuba gaped in
disbelief.
"I'm sorry, Xena!"
Gabrielle shouted over her shoulder.
She ran swiftly down the road ignoring her pain and fatigue, not knowing
her destination – only that she had to get away.
Xena recovered instantly and
took off in pursuit of her soulmate.
She ordered Lila and Hecuba to remain behind.
Gabrielle proved surprisingly
fast despite her battered body.
Finally, Xena caught her as she clambered up a steep slope.
The Bard wriggled and
writhed, but the Warrior wrapped her in strong arms and began to drag her home.
"Must write," the
young woman gasped, "Ares…"
That name caught Xena's full
attention. As gently as possible, she
wrestled her captive to the ground, and rested a boot in the small of
Gabrielle's back.
"You rat bastard! Get out here… now!" Xena didn't bother to call the bastard by
name, but he materialized anyway.
"You growled?"
Xena whirled on the God of
War, careful to keep Gabrielle pinned.
The Bard ceased her struggle
and gazed up at Ares with a mixture of fear, loathing, and longing. The handsome god winked at her. She buried
her face in her hands; a painful pounding began at the base of her skull.
"What did you do to my
friend?" Xena demanded.
"Why is it that every
time something happens to the irritating blonde, you blame me?" Ares
responded innocently.
"Because Callisto's in
heaven, Alti is somewhere in her karmic cycle, and we left Najara whacked out
in a monastery. You're the natural
choice."
"Tsk, tsk, Xena. Such hallowed company..."
Ares grinned, then looked
down at the woman on the ground. "Hey, Gabrielle. Write anything good lately?"
The Bard reacted to his taunt
with a wrenching sob. The throbbing at
her temples was becoming unbearable.
Xena snarled and pulled her
sword.
Preoccupied with their clever
exchange, neither Warrior nor War God noticed as Gabrielle wiped away the
tears. Red-hot anger replaced pain and madness. Every muscle coiled in readiness. The Bard made her move.
With unexpected speed and
strength, the Amazon Bard twisted beneath Xena's boot, pushed the Warrior
aside, and hurtled toward Ares.
The God of War failed to
sidestep in time. Gabrielle slammed into him with the full force of her
compact, muscular body, carrying them both to the slippery earth.
Before Ares could recover,
the Bard seized his sword and rolled free.
Without his sword, Ares'
godhood was a thing of the past, and Gabrielle knew it. He lunged at the woman,
who grinned wickedly and evaded him.
Xena watched in astonishment
as her friend brought the flat of the blade across the War God's shoulders with
all her might. The big man staggered,
but remained standing.
"On the ground and stay there,
dog!" Gabrielle commanded in a tone unfamiliar to everyone, including
herself. She jabbed at Ares and he
stepped back.
"I advise you to do as
she says," Xena told the uncertain God of War.
With a shrug, Ares dropped to
the ground on his belly.
"You know she can't
handle this," he said, looking up at Xena.
"Quiet!" the Bard
growled.
The pain in her head
intensified. She tried to shake it off.
Ares realized it wouldn't be long before she collapsed. The sword wavered. Gabrielle closed her eyes, fighting back a
throbbing at her temples that left her nauseated and dizzy.
Xena sensed the Bard's
anguish and saw Ares' look of triumph.
As Gabrielle struggled to maintain her balance, the War God prepared to
attack.
The Warrior Princess moved to
Gabrielle's side, never looking away from the man on the ground.
"Gabrielle… give…me…the…
sword," she commanded in a soft, measured tone.
The bladed wavered again, but
the young woman refused to yield. She
fixed Ares with an icy stare that frightened even Xena.
"Let me kill him,
Xena. Please. Let me put an end to the bastard and all the suffering he
causes."
"You don't really want
to do that, do you?"
"He deserves to die. You
and I both know it."
"Just give me the sword,
I'll take care of the rest."
"You'll kill him?"
"I’ll consider it."
Ares' shocked expression
almost made Xena laugh.
Too tired to fight any
longer, the Bard bowed her head. She lowered the sword, holding it loosely at
her side. Gently, Xena eased the weapon from Gabrielle's fist.
Ares stood and brushed the
dust off his black leathers. He held
out his hand.
"Thank you, Xena,"
he said with a sneer.
Xena twirled the sword and
stepped forward, leveling the point at Ares' chest.
"Uh, uh, uh," she
admonished. "Not until you tell me
what you did to my friend."
"Did to…? Oh, that…." The God of War assumed his most innocent air.
"What did you do to her,
Ares? Spit it out or there'll be one less god on Olympus."
Xena moved the sharp point
within an inch of his throat. Both
women saw worry, if not fear, written across his face.
The blade pressed against
Ares' now-vulnerable windpipe. He
backed away, holding up both hands.
"All right," he
admitted, "I called in a favor from the Furies."
He eyed Gabrielle disdainfully.
Yet even in her disheveled state, something about the woman stimulated
Ares.
"I offered you the
world, Gabrielle. Replace her as
my chosen warrior." Here, he
nodded toward Xena.
The God of War recalled the
Bard's vulnerability and beauty when he tried to seduce her into killing
Mavican and joining him. It had taken
awhile to recognize the feeling, but finally Ares admitted it to himself. He wanted Gabrielle in every way - her mind and spirit, her body, her
will. She was no longer the second
choice, the irritating sidekick of his Warrior Princess. She was destined to be his Amazon, his
Bard.
And, like Xena, Gabrielle had
ultimately refused him. It was more
than Ares' immense ego could take. If he couldn't possess her, he would make
her suffer.
"You have a talent, my
girl. The same as Xena." Ares twisted his words like a knife,
savoring the pain they caused.
"I do," the Bard
whispered sadly.
Gabrielle stared at her
hands. She envisioned the bloodstains
already there.
Ares continued his exquisite
torture.
"When you refused me, I
chose to give you what you really wanted.
Your passion for writing became your all-consuming obsession."
He shot Xena a quick,
triumphant glance. The Warrior resisted
an overwhelming urge to gut him with his own sword.
Gabrielle turned toward
Xena. When she spoke, her words
floated, dream-like, between them.
"The voices told me that
if I didn't write, they would destroy everyone and everything I loved…starting
with you. And if I told anyone…"
Her voice trailed off and she
collapsed to her knees, the intense pain almost blinding her. Xena felt the Bard's agony - in her
heart.
"Undo this now,
Ares!" she demanded.
"Now!"
"Sorry, my dear. It may not be up to me anymore."
The War God stalled. He knew that the Bard's condition punished
both women, and it was just a matter of time before one, or the pair, was his.
With a flash of insight, Xena
discerned Ares' plan: Use Gabrielle's pain to win the Bard herself, or to
convince the Warrior to surrender to him and save her companion.
She decided that fear would
not dissuade the god. Extricating themselves from Ares’ web required another
tactic.
"Did you even bother to
read what she wrote?"
Ares' puzzled expression
indicated that he hadn't.
"For a total bastard,
you came off pretty good in those scrolls. You almost succeed in seducing me.
You almost get Gabrielle too. And she has you and me rolling around like
weasels in at least one story."
Inwardly, Xena shuddered at
the image. On the surface, she retained her casual attitude. Everything
depended on appearing that she didn't care.
"Remind me again -- when
was the last time I nibbled that manly chest of yours?
Do you still remember how I
kiss?"
The God of War licked his
lower lip.
Xena sensed Ares' arousal.
Now that she had his full attention, she went straight from his virility to his
vanity.
"In fact, in that last
scroll, you save my daughter, and Gabrielle. The God of War sacrifices his
immortality to bring 'em both back from the dead. And earns a reward from the
grateful mother." She cocked an eyebrow.
The War God looked pleased
with himself.
"OK, so I embellished a
little," Xena thought. "The Bard isn't the only one with that
gift."
Gabrielle appeared stunned by
Xena's description of some of her worst work. She knew most if it was bad
before the ink dried, but she could not control herself. Her friend made even
that trash sound entertaining, almost noble.
Xena noted her young
companion gazing up at her, worshipping her - again. If they got through this,
she planned a long talk with Gabrielle - and enough loving to make them both
forget the horrors of the past months.
"I don’t buy a word of
it," Xena chided. "Gabrielle was much too kind. And it's only
fiction. Still, she makes you look pretty damned heroic for posterity…"
Ares studied both women, his
curiosity aroused. He wanted to see what the Bard had written. Xena pressed her point.
“Of course, we could just
burn them. “
Xena thought she saw him
wince.
“And Ares?”
“Yes?” His gazed directly into cold, deadly
eyes. A shudder of pleasure ran through
his body, followed immediately by apprehension as he watched her twirl the
sword slowly, skillfully.
“Gabrielle will never be
yours. I’m not yours. Leave us alone.”
With a resigned wave of his hand, Ares interrupted Xena's litany.
"All right. I'll see
what I can do."
"Not that it means
anything, but do I have your word of honor?" Xena asked casually.
"Yeah, yeah. Now, give
me my sword."
The Warrior Princess couldn't
resist. With a predatory grin, she feinted at the cocky immortal and laughed
when he ducked and stepped back. Then she flipped the sword, caught it
carefully, and offered it to Ares.
He snatched the blade and
sheathed it.
With a scowl at Xena, and a
regretful nod toward Gabrielle, Ares vanished.
The Warrior was on her knees
just in time to catch the Bard as she slumped to the ground.
Part 10
Effortlessly, Xena carried
Gabrielle to a shaded, grassy spot. The
woman was too light. The Warrior added
good food and frequent meals to her mental list of plans for the Bard.
After she assured herself
that the ordeal had not reopened any of Gabrielle’s wounds, Xena stretched out
beside her friend. A night of little
rest and great anxiety took its toll.
She dozed; her arm wrapped protectively around the smaller woman.
Some time later, Gabrielle
stirred. Xena awoke instantly.
Blue-Green eyes opened and
the compact blonde smiled shyly at the other woman. The iced-sapphire glow of her lover's gaze returned the
greeting. Xena knew that
"her" Gabrielle was back.
Then, the Bard noticed the
ugly bruise on Xena's arm. She touched
it tenderly.
"I'm sorry,"
Gabrielle whispered.
Xena breathed a sigh of
relief. She grasped the young woman's
hand and brought it to her lips.
"No apologies,
Gabrielle. That wasn't your
fault."
After a brief silence, Xena
spoke again.
"How are you
feeling?"
"Better. My head doesn't hurt as much and the wounds
seem to have healed somewhat. Maybe
Ares…"
“He owed you for all the pain
he caused.” Xena wasn’t about to let
her nemesis take any more credit than he deserved.
A slight breeze rustled
through the leaves above them. The Bard
shivered. Xena pulled her closer. Then, Gabrielle noticed that she wore only a
thin sleeping shift.
"Um, Xena?"
"Yes?"
"Maybe we'd better be
going home now. Mother and Lila are
sure to worry, and I'm underdressed to be roaming around."
Xena grinned wickedly.
"In all the time we've
been together, you have seldom been underdressed. Undressed maybe, but with a
body like yours…"
Before Gabrielle could think
up a sly retort, the dark woman continued.
"Let's stay here a little
longer. There are some things I need to say. I'll keep you warm."
"All right, but you also
have the duty of defending my honor from any passing wildlife."
Xena laughed, and Gabrielle
joined her. As their laughter faded,
the Warrior began to formulate a way to tell her companion what was on her
mind.
"Gabrielle, I read those
scrolls."
"They weren't my
best," the Bard replied.
"I’ll understand if you hated them."
"Not at all. Several were really entertaining, and some
were as good as anything you've ever written."
Gabrielle squeezed Xena's
hand.
The Warrior dreaded going
on. Her courage was failing fast, but
she might never have another chance.
Gabrielle noticed her
partner's hesitation. "What is it,
Xena?"
"Well, uh…" The
older woman's discomfort was apparent.
The Bard cocked her head and
waited.
"You know that last
scroll? The one you called Motherhood?"
"Yes?"
"You wrote in there that
I killed you with my chakram," Xena stated flatly. But Gabrielle heard the trepidation in her
voice.
The Bard weighed her next
words carefully. This was obviously a
sensitive issue, and much depended on her response.
Gabrielle breathed deeply,
fixed her gaze upon the Warrior, and plunged into the heart of the matter.
"You're wondering if
that's what I really think, right? That
you could actually kill me…in defense of your daughter."
"Yes."
"Xena, I don't
know. I'm not sure of anything
anymore. I do know how I felt… how you
felt…before Solan took us to Illusia. I
could have killed you then…and I tried.
You tried to kill me. We're both
capable of that. Even with each
other."
Xena started to rise. Gabrielle gripped her friend's arm. The dark woman attempted to twist away, but
the Bard found her reserves and held tight.
Xena sat.
"Just listen to me,
please. Then you can leave if you
want."
Gabrielle continued to think
aloud, while the Warrior stared into the distance, fighting back tears.
"I also know how much
you love me, and that my heart and soul belong to you, always. We love each other so deeply, yet we hurt
each other more than anyone else can hurt either of us. People say that those in love don't do
this. I don’t buy it anymore. Where there's a great capacity for love,
there's also a great chance for harm.
Worse yet, there's not caring at all… growing apart without knowing
why. The not caring scares me more than
any pain. Pain I can handle, but just
turning away from each other would kill me as surely as any weapon."
The Warrior Princess smiled
sadly at her companion.
"Xena, I'm only a
bard. I don't have the answer. But remember that this was mostly fiction
anyway... by a spellbound writer, no less. Give me a break, please? After all,
Ares wasn't the best muse."
Xena's sad smile brightened
and she looked at the woman beside her with fresh eyes. Suddenly, Gabrielle seemed years
younger. She recalled the innocence and
optimism that won her heart in their first season together. Despite everything, Gabrielle had retained
the special gifts that made her… Gabrielle.
The young woman sensed a
softening and ventured one step further.
"I mean, can you believe
I actually made that bastard the good guy at the end? What a stretch!"
Xena stood and grinned at her
companion. She reached down and pulled
Gabrielle to her feet. The Bard came up
gracefully - all the way to Xena's chest, wrapping strong arms around the
taller woman's neck and hauling her into a searing kiss.
Xena decided to devour
Gabrielle right there.
"Is this OK?" asked
the Warrior as she tightened the embrace.
"Perfect." Gabrielle's husky growl almost obscured her
response.
Xena grasped the sleeping
shift at the neck. With a soft tearing
sound, the sparse fabric gave way. The Warrior simply brushed the garment off
the Bard's shoulders, baring her.
Before Gabrielle could react,
they were on the soft ground. The Bard responded enthusiastically. Both women explored their long-suppressed
passion, until the smaller cried out and collapsed back on the grass with a
tired, satisfied smile.
"Hey, I'm injured,
remember?"
"Uh, uh," the
Warrior replied in her characteristic "you-don't-fool-me-a-bit" tone
as she got to her feet. Her knees were
still shaking.
"And you know
what?"
"What, Gabrielle?"
"I don't care if I don’t
write another thing for at least… a day."
The Bard cocked an eyebrow.
"Let's get you dressed
and go home," suggested the Warrior Princess. She offered a strong hand, and reveled in the firm, warm grip
that met hers.