HOW WE SPENT OUR SUMMER VACATION

THE PARTNER TRAP

by Scully

icehockey@iwon.com

Disclaimer: This is a work of fiction, actually almost science fiction. Any resemblance to any real person is impossible and any fictional character purely a miracle! This is my homage to three of my favorite Bards and two of my favorite uber couples. Dar and Kerry belong to Melissa Good and Harper and Kelsey belong to TN and Fanatic. I pray in time the three of them will forgive me. A special thank you to L.A. for very helpful feedback, being a terrific beta reader and even better friend.

CHAPTER ONE: "AND HAVE A GAY OL’ TIME"

It was the first week in June and even though the air was warming up nicely there was still a chilly breeze blowing off the ocean swells that rolled onto the sandy shores of Provincetown, Massachusetts. P-Town, as it was affectionately known to the locals and frequent visitors alike, was the gay Mecca of the northeast. The tiny town, which sat on the very tip of Cape Cod began its summer influx around Memorial Day and everyone partied straight, (oops excuse me) gayly forward until Labor Day weekend in September. There was the ever popular Women’s Week in October but mostly the shops started to close one by one and the town settled in for a sleepy winter’s hibernation until the following Spring.

Harper Lee Kingsley was resting her six foot plus frame on the steps of yet another store that her shop-aholic spouse had wandered into. Dressed in her favorite khaki shorts and "Exposure" t-shirt she casually rested her arms across the tops of her bare kneecaps, pale blue eyes people watching behind dark sunglasses. The sun felt nice on her skin and she tilted her head towards the light and smiled to herself.

It had been many years since Harper had visited Provincetown. She loved coming here in her early twenties and just tearing loose. During the day throngs of people crowded Commercial Street, the main, one-way thoroughfare through town, shopping, eating and of course scoping out the scenery, the ‘scenery’ being each other. At night it was a party town. There were shows, bars and places to just dance the night away. Drag Queens, celebrity impersonators and stand up comedians practiced their craft in small clubs all along Commercial. Many a relationship was ignited and some came to a blazing end on these narrow streets. Here in this small coastal town, gays and lesbians were the majority, so there was a nice feeling of community, acceptance and just general fun and goodwill that you couldn’t help being affect by.

There were gays and lesbians of every conceivable size, shape, color and nationality. It was not uncommon to see gay couples with an infant in a stroller or strapped to the back of one of the proud parents.

Watching one such couple walk by struck Harper with a sudden, instant longing to see her own set of twins left behind at home.

Kelsey Diane Stanton Kingsley immerged from the shop door directly behind Harper. She was over a half a foot shorter than her partner, had very green eyes and short white blond hair. "You miss the babies don’t you Tabloid?" It was more of a statement than question. She ran her fingers through the raven hair so near her hand.

The sudden touch startled Harper out of her thoughts and she swiveled her dark head around and quirked a sheepish grin. "Yeah, you caught me." She nodded and stood dropping an arm around partner’s shoulder.

Kelsey eased into an embrace and laid her hand gently on Harper’s chest. "Sweetheart it’s ok to miss them, I do too! It’s the first time we’ve been away from them for any length of time since they were born."

Harper shrugged, hiding her emotions behind the wrap-around Raybans.

"They are three years old now honey and Auntie Brian has been begging to have them to himself for a little while and spoil them rotten." Green eyes softened as Kelsey rubbed the palm of her hand over the smooth surface of Harper’s shirt feeling the warm skin underneath.

‘Auntie’ Brian had been Kelsey’s personal assistant when she was a television news anchor and now he was the Kingsley’s full time ‘nanny’. He was as flamboyant and funny as any gay man had a right to be and he adored the Kingsley twins and both Kels and Harper knew he would protect them with his life.

Harper folded her arms around her lover and rested her chin on the blond head. "Brian just wants to take the kids to the park every day because he says they’re stud magnets." Through the warm cotton of the t-shirt, Kelsey felt the chuckle against her cheek.

She had to laugh along with her at the truth of it. "He does really love them Harper, as do we but we really needed to get away, just the two of us. No families, phones, employees or even the Kitchen Conspiracy, no matter how much we miss them." Kelsey pulled back and traced a gentle finger down Harper’s chiseled profile. "I really do miss the kids with all my heart, but these few days with you have been truly priceless."

Now how could she feel bad about that? Harper leaned in and placed a gentle kiss on Kelsey’s lips. "Same here Little Roo."

"Well come on then Stud! There is shopping to be done!" the blond grabbed a hand and tugged Harper along. "Did you find the novel you were looking for in the bookstore?"

"Nope, but I want to go back and look at a couple others at some point."

"Ok we can do that. Now let’s go find some gifts to take back to the kids and your family, and my family ….." Kelsey voice went on as her tall shadow mumbled to herself. Shopping: the most fun you can have with your clothes on …..

Harper and Kelsey weaved their way down Commercial Street through the crowds of milling shoppers gathering admiring glances as they went. Kelsey grinned to herself. Yep, you can look ladies but she is all mine. She glanced up at her lover’s relaxed features knowing the tall beauty was completely unaware of the attention she had a tendency to garner.

Oddly enough the tall beauty herself was thinking the same thoughts about her smaller companion. She has no idea just how attractive she really is. Harper smiled proudly. Heh.

They were an extremely handsome couple.

CHAPTER TWO: "DO NOT ATTEMPT TO ADJUST YOUR SET"

A few hundred yards in the other direction on Commercial Street an alarmingly identical handsome couple was browsing the shelves of Womankinda Books.

The ‘tall dark one’ was Paladar Roberts and her shorter, lighter companion was Kerrison Stuart.

Kerry was leaning over a large old rocking chair in the corner of the shop, lavishing a large gray and white tabby cat with a good scratch behind the ears and was being rewarded with a loud, contented purr.

"Leave it to you to find an animal to connect with." Dar smiled, voiced laced with affection.

"Well you act the same way when I scratch you behind the ear my dear." Kerry smirked not looking back at her partner.

"You are just too funny today." The tall executive drawled quietly reaching out to pinch the cute little butt that was so conveniently at hand.

"Hey!"

Innocent blue eyes twinkled.

Kerry stood and gave her a mock scowl and then grinned. "So did you find a book you like?"

"Yep." Dar nodded waving said book in the air. "You?"

"Yeah. I kinda felt like reading a romance so I thought this looked interesting."

Kerry handed the book over to her partner who brought it to eye level and read aloud. "Tropical Depression by Melissa Goodbard. Hmm… well I felt like a little sci-fi myself." Dar replied giving Kerry her book for inspection.

"The Claiming of Chevy by T. Fannova." Kerry recited. "Well looks like we have some great beach reading material."

Dar snapped both books up and headed for the counter. "You got lunch, I’ll get these." Kerry knew better than to protest.

A pleasant looking woman Dar guessed to be in her mid fifties greeted her behind the counter. "Well I see you came back and found a book to your liking this time."

Dar looked her question. "Back?"

"Yeah." the woman continued. "Were you not just in here a couple hours ago?"

"No, sorry. Wasn’t me." Dar shrugged with a crooked grin.

The older woman placed both her palms on the counter and leaned towards Dar. "Honey, God could not have blessed this planet with two women who look exactly like you. She is not that generous."

Kerry, hearing that statement came up beside her slightly blushing partner and rubbed her arm. "She’s so right there sweetheart."

Dar regained a bit of her composure. "Sorry, it really wasn’t me, honest."

"Whatever you say." The woman laughed handing Dar her change. "But this certainly has been a pleasant déjà vu. Enjoy the rest of your day."

With that, the bemused couple bid her goodbye and left the shop. Once on the street, Kerry regarded her tall partner. "You know that is kind of odd." Dar paused to listen. "I mean people are always mistaking me for someone else. Short, green-eyed, blonds …"

"You forgot adorable." Dar interjected.

Kerry crinkled her nose when she smiled and went on. "Women with my body type are a dime a dozen." Dar threw her the ‘as if!’ look. "But raven haired beauties over 6 foot tall with baby blues to die for well ….." that remark earned her a grunt and a roll of said baby blues.

"On the other hand," the blond head nodded with a clue. "She was probably just making up that story so she could ogle you a little longer." She gave Dar a tiny hip check.

"Now that," Dar dropped an arm around her lover’s shoulders, "makes about as much sense as me having a twin running around here."

They strolled off down Commercial Street in contented silence for awhile, just enjoying the sun and the feel of each other’s close contact. Kerry looked up and regarded the strong jawline of Dar’s profile and grinned to herself. Wow two Dars? I can hardly handle this one! Aloud she voiced, "Listen, there are a bunch of stores I have yet to explore and, well, I know how much you love to shop and all …" this was met with a mock glare. "I was thinking why don’t you find a sandy beach or little bar and relax. I’ll finish with the shopping and meet you at the ice cream stand in the middle of town say, at six?" Kerry really wanted to shop alone because there were several little surprise gifts she wanted to get her partner so she was delighted with Dar’s response.

"Sure that sounds good." Dar answered mentally plotting the same gift-buying scheme. "Then we can have some dinner and maybe get some drinks later and catch a show. Heard there was a nice new bar in town called Xena’s."

"Oooo now how could I go wrong with that plan?" Kerry’s eyes danced as she lifted up on her toes and planted a gentle kiss on Dar’s lips. "See ya then." She whirled around and sauntered away knowing full well admiring eyes followed her every step.

"Whoa there Little Roo!" Harper laughed reaching out to steady a teetering Kelsey who was peeking over the edge of several shopping bags she was carrying. "Did you leave anything in the stores for the rest of the tourists?"

"Keep it up Tabloid and no surprise for you tonight." Green eyes narrowed.

"A surprise?" Harper was worse than the kids when it came to presents. "What did you buy me?" She tried to sneak a look in a bag.

"Who said I bought you anything Stud?" Kelsey leered at her.

Harper’s eyes returned the leer. "I like those kind of surprises."

"Honey, there are a couple more stores I would like to check out." Kelsey said sweetly.

"Now there’s a big surprise." Her partner responded drolly.

"Do the words ‘thin ice’ have any meaning for you Tabloid?" A charming grin was her response. "Ok just for that you get to take all the packages to the car. But as a reward, you also have a couple hours reprieve from shopping and may blissfully find a quiet corner to hide in or nap or whatever you wish."

"Ah now that sounds like a plan." The tall beauty showed an even, white smile taking the armload of packages.

"We can meet at the House of Chocolate down near the post office around six, ok?" Kelsey stood on tiptoes leaning over the bags and giving Harper a sweet kiss.

"Well I won’t forget that location." The brunette mumbled against her lover’s lips.

Kelsey pulled back "Oops! Look at that Stud, your surprise just slipped through the thin ice right behind you."

They both laughed. "See ya later cute stuff. Don’t melt the plastic." Harper moved off sensing the intense gaze on her back until she rounded the street corner.

CHAPTER 3: "MIRROR, MIRROR"

Kerry was browsing one of the many shops in P-town that carried every kind of T, polo and sweatshirt one could ever want. Most of them had some local or gay themed logo or slogan on them and made great gifts … especially for myself! The blond held up a light blue polo shirt that had the image of Pilgrim’s Monument embroidered over the left breast.

Pilgrim’s Monument was a very high stone tower that stood in the middle of town. It had been built as a memorial to the first settlers on the cape. The tower had a distinct shape and was probably the most popular symbol of Provincetown and therefore the gay community. The symbol could be found on just about any type of item in any gift shop in P-town. The monument was a popular place to visit on a clear day because a strenuous climb to the top rewarded the visitor with a spectacular view of the surrounding town and harbor.

This color matches Dar’s eyes. Kerry mused while checking the tag for washing instructions. Think I’ll try it on anyway just to be sure. She headed to the back of the store where she could see a sign indicating the changing rooms.

The young blond pulled the polo shirt over her head and down over her well muscled stomach, shrugging her shoulders to settle the material. She tucked the shirt in her shorts and turned around in a circle only to find there were no mirrors in the dressing room. "Damn." Remembering there was a full-length mirror in the small entryway to the tiny cubicles, Kerry step out from behind the curtain and turned right seeing nothing but a blank wall. "Oops."

She did an about face and came face to face with her reflection. But wait. Her reflection had on denim shorts and she swore she had put on her white cargo shorts this morning. She looked down. Yep, white cargo. It took a few seconds for the thought to take hold and sink in. What?! Kerry’s heart pounded in her ears as she slowly raised her mist green eyes and found an identical pair staring alarmingly back at her.

Kelsey Kingsley audibly gasped, startling both slacked jawed blonds.

"Wha ..??!"

"Buh …?"

The two mirror images slowly circled each other, eyes scanning up and down in disbelief and fascination. They did a complete 360 of one another strangely enough reminding Kerry of a Marx Brothers movie that she and Dar had just recently rented.

"Oh …. my … god." Kerry finally breathed.

Kelsey nodded numbly. "Uh … yeah."

The two women were virtually identical. Kerry’s hair was slightly longer, coming almost to her shoulders. Their shoes and shorts were different but oddly enough, they had even tried on the same embroidered blue polo shirt.

"Ok." Kelsey put her hands out in front of her as if to halt the situation. "Stephen King or the ghost of Rod Serling must be around here somewhere."

"Or candid camera." Her twin supplied.

"That would work too." Kelsey extended her hand, trying to wrap her mind around what she was seeing. "Kelsey Kingsley …. I think."

That relaxed Kerry a bit and drew a smile. "Kerry Stuart." She grasped the hand, her own fingers trembling. "Wow, do you think we were twins separated at birth or something?"

Kelsey raised her fair brows. "Is your mom a self-centered, dangerously egomaniacal control freak?"

"Um, no but my dad was."

"Well I don’t know about you Kerry, but I am in dire need of a drink … or two … or three." Kelsey still looked a little pale. "How about we find a bar and get to know each other a little? I want to know where you got my face."

"Absolutely." Kerry agreed. "Dar is never going to believe this."

"Who is Dar?"

"My partner." Kerry’s face lit up. "I have a picture of her in my wallet and I’ll show you over drinks."

A little over an hour later with a pitcher of beer sitting empty on the table between the new friends, Kelsey and Kerry sat staring dumbfounded at the photos of Dar and Harper laying on the rough wooden surface in front of them. Two sets of incredulous green eyes glanced up at each other and they burst out laughing. The first thing they had done after ordering their beer was to whip out wallets with their respective photos and received their second major shock of the afternoon. After many said glasses of beer and a lot of conversation they had settled into a fog of wonder and playful acceptance of this bizarre circumstance.

"Harper and Dar are just gonna freak!" Kerry could not stop laughing.

When they had both calmed down a little Kelsey narrowed her eyes. "Ah Kerry," she said slyly. "Just how well do you think our tall, dark and deadly good looking women know us?"

"I can only speak for Dar, but she knows me better than anyone on the planet." Kerry said with conviction. "Why?"

"I think Harper knows me that well too but you wanna put it to the test?" A slightly evil smile slid across fair features.

The clue finally smacked Kerry in the head and she had just enough beer in her to giggle. "Yeah!"

"Great!" Kelsey slapped her palm on the table making Kerry jump. "But we do look a little different. Your hair is longer than mine …."

"I’ll cut it!"

"You will?"

"Hell yeah!" Kerry hiccupped. "Can’t pass up an opportunity like this can we? I saw a salon across from the post office. Let’s go!" She jumped up, grabbed Kelsey’s hand and pulled her twin to her feet.

"Whoo hoo!" Kelsey beamed. "I like your style!" Then thought, well of course I would. They threw some bills on the table to cover the tab and made their way out the door.

The blond Doublemint Twins were giggling and weaving their way back up Commercial Street right past the outdoor patio of Café Blasé. The café was a terrific place to sit in the warm afternoon sun, have a drink and people watch. Kelsey and Kerry were completely oblivious to two sets of identical blue eyes peering over plastic menus doing just that.

After the women had ambled safely past, Harper lowered her menu and flashed Dar a broad, white smile. "Oh, oh. I see our better halves have discovered each other."

Dar returned the identical smile because she could. "If Kelsey is anything like Kerry, we have major double trouble."

"Heh." Harper chuckled. "Let’s find out what our little Olsen Twins are up to shall we?"

"Absolutely."

They both kept their eyes on the bobbing fair heads and eased into the foot traffic flowing all around them.

The two tall dark haired women had met much as Kelsey and Kerry did, completely by accident. Harper had gone back to the public parking lot near the pier, and was putting her armload of packages away in the hatch of their rented SUV. She locked the vehicle up tight again, turned around and had come face to face with Dar who had been doing the same to her rental across the row from her. They went through the same initial shock, finally deciding a drink at the Café Blasé was in order to finish the conversation and compare notes. So when their lovers had strolled by they had already gotten over their second surprise of the afternoon themselves.

"You still see them?" Harper hopped up and down trying to see over many heads.

"Yep." Dar extended an arm. "Right there. They just went down the steps into that shop. Let’s go into the post office across the street and watch from there." She suggested changing where she was pointing.

"Sounds good. Lead on."

"The Barbie Shop." Kerry read the sign on the window. "We’ll Make You Look Like A Living Doll. Oh good lord! Do I want to go in there?"

Kelsey gave her a little shove towards the stairs. "Can’t back out now. We’re on a mission!"

They approached a pink wooden door and swung it open. They were assaulted by the smell of permanents and more pink. Everything was pink. The counters, chairs, ceiling and even the floor tiles.

"Holy Pepto!" Kelsey laughed. "It looks just like the Beauty Salon Barbie set I had when I was eight … ah only a little larger … and ….pinker."

The shop was void of customers and the only sound was a radio playing some 50’s music in the background. Just then some saloon type doors, pink of course, leading to a back room, burst outward, a tall, slim young man with flaming (no pun intended) red hair glided into the shop and stopped dead in his tracks when he spotted Kerry and Kelsey.

"Oh my god!" A delicate hand fluttered to his chest. "I am having a Patty Duke moment!" He lowered his voice an octave. "I adore doing twins."

Kerry shook that mental picture out of her head to keep her brains from running out her ears. "We’re not twins."

"Right, and I’m Madonna." He paused. "Well actually I am Madonna on Tuesday and Wednesday nights and twice on Sunday at the Crown and Anchor." Then he waved his hands in front of him as if erasing the words from the air.

Kelsey tried to help. "We’re not even related. We just met recently as a matter of fact."

"Ohhhhh." He shook a finger at them and winked. "A couple! How kinky!"

Two sets of green eyes grew wide with realization and looked at each other. "Ewwwww!"

"Talk about getting to know oneself." Kelsey choked back a laugh.

"Look." Kerry pinched the bridge of her nose and tried to get the conversation somewhat back on track. "I just want my hair cut to look just like hers." She nodded to her counterpart.

"Uh huh." He grinned wickedly.

Kelsey rolled her eyes. "No! We just want to play a little joke on our partners."

"Well girl, why didn’t you say so!" He grabbed Kerry by the hand and led her a tall chair in front of a bank of mirrors. "My name is Ryan by the way and I’ll be your stylist today."

The blond in the chair smiled up at his reflection in front of her. "I’m Kerry and this …" she tilted her head toward her companion seated in the chair next to them, "is Kelsey."

Ryan placed both hands on his hips, rust eyebrows hiked. "Kerry and Kelsey huh?"

"Don’t start!" The two women glared in unison.

He gave them a satisfied smirk and grandly unfurled a large pink apron and draped it around Kerry’s neck. Noticing something on the front of the plastic covering her, she glanced down at her chest. It was a face but not recognizing it upside down she raised her eyes to the mirror to see Brad Pitt smiling back at her.

It was Kerry’s turn to smirk.

"Honey, not everyone is as adorable as you two." Ryan ran a comb through the blond strands. "Some people I work on are real DOAs."

Kelsey looked up from the People magazine she had been thumbing through. "Dead On Arrival?"

"Huh?" Ryan stilled hands hovered above Kerry’s head. Then it dawned on him and he cracked up. "Dear heavens no! Although sometimes I wonder. DOA ….. Dogs of America." He explained.

"Tsk. Not nice." Kerry waggled at finger at his reflection.

"Maybe not but that’s why Brad is there. Just in case. Then I have something beautiful to find in the mirror. I love beauty!"

"Can’t say I blame you there." Kerry reached into her back pocket where she had stashed Dar’s photo earlier and waved it in front of the hairstylist’s face. "This is what I wake up to every morning."

Ryan plucked the photo out of extended fingers and emitted a low whistle. "Wow! She’s hot!"

"Oh yeah."

He turned to Kelsey. "And what does yours look like sweetie?"

"Trust me," Kelsey replied without looking up. "You don’t want to know."

Across the street from the salon, two sets of curious pale eyes peered through the darkened plate glass window that fronted the tiny Provincetown Post Office.

Dar squinted, trying to see what was going on in the Barbie Shop. "It looks like Kerry is getting her hair cut." She frowned. "That’s really odd."

Harper grunted a reply and then her eyes popped wide open. "They’re gonna Parent Trap us!"

"What?"

"You know. The Disney movie where twins that have been separated at a very young age when their parents divorced, meet by accident at a summer camp and they devise a plan to switch places when they go home so they can get to know their other parent better."

"Disney huh?" Dar quirked a grin.

"When you have twin three year olds, Dar, you tend to watch a lot of Disney." Harper explained a little defensively.

"Hmm. Well the movie sounds a bit complicated for three year olds Harper." Dar raised an elegant brow. "I just think Hayley Mills fits into your category of cute little blonds."

"That’s funny." Her dark haired counterpart matched the eyebrow. "I don’t remember mentioning Hayley Mills being in that movie."

Dar had the grace to blush slightly and Harper relented with a laugh and laid a hand on her shoulder. "I guess we just have really good taste in women."

"So," Dar was anxious to get back to the matter at hand. "They are going to switch places and see how long it takes us to realize it?"

"Apparently." Harper nodded and they were quiet for a moment. "You know," a sly grin formed. "We could really have some fun with this."

Dar’s eyes twinkled with devilish mischief. "They don’t know we know and I’m sure they both expect us to catch on almost immediately, putting a quick end to their charade."

"Exactly, but .." Harper’s eyes reflected the same mischief, " …we are just not going to catch on are we? Not only that, we can be any personality we want because even though we look alike they have no idea what to expect otherwise."

Dar had to laugh at the idea of it.

Harper continued. "So what type of person really drives Kerry nuts?"

"Kinda studly egotistical ones." Dar replied. "How about Kelsey?"

"Sickenly sweet kissasses."

"Well," Dar nodded her head side to side. "That would be a stretch for me but I think I can pull it off."

Her twin laughed. "Unfortunately the studly egotist was pretty much who I was when Kels and I met."

"How did you meet?"

"Ah, well the first time Kelsey laid eyes on me in person, I was parked in front of her office building on my first day of employment there. I was straddling a Harley, liplocked with a woman who was straddling me."

"Ouch." Dar grimaced.

"Eeeyah but I wasn’t feeling much pain at the time." Harper grinned. "How about you and Kerry?"

"The company I work for bought the company she worked for and one morning I marched into her office to fire everyone, including her."

There was a moment of silence. "You win." Harper stated flatly.

Just then there was a minor commotion in the pedestrian traffic swarming Commercial Street. The crowd slowly parted like the Red Sea as a motorized scooter buzzed towards them. Riding grandly atop the small vehicle with long black hair flowing in the wind was Cher. Black heels led to fish net stockings covering long legs that rode up, literally, into a black thong. A short red leather jacket completed the ensemble. Following closely behind on a 1950’s style bicycle, ringing the little bell on the handlebars was Pee Wee Herman.

A wide grin spread across Harper’s face. "I love this town!"

Dar’s brows furrowed. "I have a feeling that really wasn’t Cher."

"No. Really?" Harper responded drolly.

"I have a feeling it wasn’t even a woman."

"Heh. Welcome to P-town my friend." Harper chuckled and then suddenly grabbed her elbow. "Look, there they are!"

Following Harper’s line of vision, Dar found Kerry and Kelsey standing back outside on the street in deep discussion. "Damn. Do they look alike now!" She marveled.

"Sure do. So where and when do you meet up with Kerry again?"

Dar regarded her watch. "In fifteen minutes in front of the ice cream stand near the center of town. You?"

"Same time in front of the House of Chocolate."

"Seems our girls have more in common than looks and us." Dar said dryly. "So we’ll see how long we can string them along and drive them a little crazy?"

"Sounds good to me." Harper agreed. "See if we can get them to want to trade us back before they kill us."

"Just remember." Dar pointed a finger at her image. "Don’t do anything with Kerry that you would not want me doing with Kelsey." It was only half in jest.

Harper assumed a complete look of innocence and placed an index finger on her chin. "Now if you can’t trust this face who can you trust?"

Dar had absolutely no answer for that.

CHAPER 5: "IS IT REAL OR IS IT MEMOREX"

"How do I look?" Kerry ran fingers through her newly shorn hair. It actually felt good to get it cut short for the summer anyway. Dar liked her hair any length so she was not particularly worried about her lover’s reaction.

"Looks fabulous if I may say so myself." Kelsey winked. "Ok. So if they ask about why we are dressed differently then when they left us we can just say we bought new outfits. The way I shop Harper will believe that in a heartbeat. We can find a restroom and change into those new blue polos we both bought so it won’t be a complete lie."

Kerry nodded. "I doubt the ruse will last that long anyway. Dar knows me far too well."

"Yeah me too. Harper I mean." Kelsey shook her head. "You know what I mean. Anyway first partner to catch on wins dinner from the two losers."

"You’re on. Let’s have an hour at least with our new ‘dates’ because I honestly would love to get to know the woman who shares my lover’s face, and we can meet somewhere at seven o’clock for dinner and then all get to know one another a little better." Kerry suggested.

"Great. How about Theren’s Warf for lobsters?"

"Oooo. Now you’re talking." Kerry’s mouth was watering already. The two blonds moved off to find their mate’s clone.

Kerry was a little nervous as she approached the candy store looking for a tall, dark, very familiar stranger. She spotted Harper leaning against the building, one leg bent at the knee, foot resting back against the surface behind her. She was engaged in conversation with a cute brunette who was standing just a little too close to the tall beauty. The green-eyed monster began to rear its ugly head. Get a grip Kerry! Remember that’s not Dar. She plastered a smile on her face and approached her lover’s replica. "I hope you’re not offering her candy to get into your car, Harper." She couldn’t help herself.

The dark head snapped up. "Hiya sweetknees!" Blue eyes leered but slid sideways to give the brunette a ghost of a wink to dismiss her. She returned her attention to Kerry, scooped her up in long arms and placed both large hands on the blond’s butt. "You have such a great ass." She breathed in a pink ear.

Kerry was momentarily stunned but quickly regained her composure and pulled back a little. "Why thank you Stud." She winked using the nickname Kelsey had supplied her with. Whoa! Kelsey forgot to mention how aggressive Harper is! She found herself looking into intense eyes twinkling back at her. Well same body, same face and almost but not quite the same eyes. Gazing into the blue orbs she noted that her soulmate was nowhere to be found. She is this close and doesn’t realize I am not Kelsey? Crudpuppies! What if she tries to kiss me?

Harper was thinking that very thought but knew she would not like her twin kissing Kelsey even if it were just for show so she slowly lowered Kerry to her feet. "Come on sexy, let’s see if we can find some unsuspecting straight folks who took a wrong turn at Wellfleet and wandered into town. We’ll give ‘em an eyeful." With that Harper draped an arm over the shorter woman’s shoulder pulling her close, long fingers nearly brushing against Kerry’s breast.

I am SO in trouble. Kerry’s mind scrambled.

Dar was seated on a wooden bench near the ice cream stand browsing though a whale watching brochure she had picked up at the information center. She was aware of her partner’s double slowly approaching her but she pretended to be engrossed in her reading. Lifting her eyes slightly she could watch Kelsey draw near. She’s just as cute but even from her walk alone, I would know right away it was not Kerry. Dar somehow was not really surprised by that realization but it calmed her never the less.

Kelsey took a deep breath and dropped down onto the bench beside the raven-haired double. "Hey."

Startled pale eyes met hers. "Oh. Hello sweetheart!" Dar smiled shyly dropping a hand to cover her smaller one on the bench. "I am so sorry I didn’t see you approaching."

Kelsey shrugged. "No problem." Harper’s good looks but definitely not her energy. "What have you been up to while I wore out our credit card?"

"Well," Dar started softly. "I really, really missed you for starters." Her expression dripped with adoration. "I was looking into these whale watching trips that sound interesting." Concerned eyes grew wide. "But only if you wanted to go of course. I wouldn’t want to do anything that you wouldn’t enjoy. I love you and want to you be happy on our vacation." She added to the act by raising the blond’s hand and placing a chaste kiss on the knuckles.

Kelsey knew her jaw had swung loose so she shut it with an audible click. "Ah, yeah well that sounds like fun Dar. We’ll have to check it out tomorrow."

"I see you bought a new outfit." Dar’s voice was low, words spoken very slowly. "It’s very becoming on you dearheart. But then you look good in whatever you wear."

How on earth does Kerry stay awake around her? Yoo hoo! I am NOT Kerry, I am NOT Kerry! "Um yeah." She plucked at the material on the new polo. "I got this color because it matches your eyes."

"That is just so romantic!" Dar managed to get her eyes to tear up by biting the inside of her cheek.

I’m gonna spew any second. Kerry sat stunned. I need some chocolate just so I don’t doze off through this. Aloud. "How about some ice cream?" She began to rise.

"Wonderful idea darling." The tall woman rose and gently pushed on Kelsey’s shoulders to get her to sit back down. "You just sit right there and I’ll go get whatever your little heart desires. So what will it be?"

Harper and a big bed! "A double chocolate cone would be great." She smiled through clinched teeth.

"Excellent choice! I will be right back." Dar quickly turned and headed off before Kelsey could catch her laughing.

"So cookie lips …" Harper began.

Cookie lips?

"Saw a little shop in my travels this afternoon where we could buy some great new toys." Her lover’s double continued, her arm still wrapped possessively around Kerry’s shoulders and bestowed a sexy grin on her.

"I’m sure the kids would love that Harper." Kerry nodded remembering for the moment she was the mother of twins.

"No sugarbuns! The toys are for us." Harper growled suggestively. "We need a new harness. Remember you chewed through the last one."

Kerry actually heard herself squeek. Her mind flashed back to a memory of shopping for outfits to attend Dar’s class reunion. They had entered a leather shop and she had gotten an eye opening education. What are these two into? She doesn’t even realize I am not her lover! Poor, poor Kelsey.

Harper released her captive, walked a few paces ahead and spun around crooking her finger in a ‘come hither’ motion. "Come with me now and I’ll make you come with me later my little raisinette." She laughed at her own cleverness.

Raisinette! I’ll raisinette you, you big goober! Kerry screamed in her head. "I am right behind you Stud." She offered loud enough for Harper to pick up.

Harper faced forward again smothering a grin. I should not be having this much fun.

"I also discovered a shop that sells the most delightful cup of coffee so I sat on the beach, watch the kids flying kites and enjoyed my find." Dar’s voice droned on describing their time apart. She gently squeezed the smaller hand she was holding. "Maybe we should buy some kites."

"Uh? Oh sure. Sounds like a real hoot Dar." Kelsey’s eyes were glazing over and she stifled a yawn. This woman makes my teeth itch! Glancing at her watch she realized she had been listening to Dar’s monologue for almost forty-five minutes but that meant relief was near at hand. She probably realizes I am not Kerry but is too gods be damned polite to bring it up! "Hey I’m getting kinda hungry. How about we head over to Theren’s and order up some lobsters?" She said with a humorless smile.

"That’s a great idea honey! You and a lobster dinner. Life is truly wonderful is it not?" Dar was beginning to make herself sick.

"Oh you’re … um ….it’s special alright." Kelsey answered pulling her tall shadow along by the hand. She could not get to the restaurant fast enough.

LITTLE SHOP OF HORNY the blinking neon sign announced loudly.

Kerry blanched and turned to Harper who at the moment was ogling a cute little redhead passing by. How does Kelsey put up with this? The blond glanced at her watch. 6:50 p.m. Thank you Jesus, Mary and Joseph! She thought with utter relief and ran a finger down Harper’s bare arm getting the dark head to swivel back in her direction. She batted blond lashes. "Honey I’m hungry."

"Oh me too baby!" blue eyes gazed with lust into green.

What a piggywonk! Kerry mentally rolled her eyes. "No silly." She pinched Harper’s cheek a little harder than she intended. Focus you big walking hormone! "Right now I’m craving lobster at Theren’s and later …." She leaned in close, "I’ll be craving you."

That retort caught Harper a little off guard but she quickly regained her balance. "I’ll hold you to that blondie." She has those green-eyed manipulation tactics down. She chuckled to herself. Damn. I get the impression that Kerry is just a bit more naïve than my Little Roo. The shop would have been fun. She let herself be lead away.

CHAPTER 6: "ON SPECIAL TONIGHT — TWIN LOBSTERS"

Pushing through the restaurant door ahead of Harper, Kerry was deep in thought. I just know Dar recognized Kelsey was not me right off. Do I tell the poor woman that Harper never picked up on it or that her partner is a stud in the true sense of the word? I mean she must know that right? She scanned the packed restaurant for her partner and her look-alike. Kerry didn’t see them but spotted a carved wooden sign above a doorway to her right. Xena’s. That must be the bar Dar was telling me about.

"You say something pumpkin butt?" Harper interrupted her musings.

Kerry was seething. "No dear. It’s really crowded so let’s give our name to the hostess and go have a drink in the bar." She guessed that’s where Dar would probably suggest that she and Kelsey wait for a table if they arrived first. Kerry prayed the other couple was already there. She didn’t hear a reply, but knew the taller woman was following along as she headed to the arched doorway that led into Xena’s.

The first thing Kerry noticed besides a strange feeling of familiarity, was a sudden sense of taking a step back in time. The large, dark room had the décor of a tavern of old. It was a scene right out of the show itself, complete with two bartenders dress like the Warrior Princess and her Bardly companion. There were posters, photos, props and all matter of memorabilia pertaining to the series adorning the walls, celebrating the show’s very popular stars. The dynamic duos weapons of choice, the chakram and sai were represented frequently within the design of the tables and bar stools.

Kerry grinned to herself remembering all the wonderful hours watching Xena curled up in her lover’s warm embrace.

Xena’s was packed with a happy, chatting crowd gathered at the bar and surrounding tables. Kerry stood on tiptoes and spotted a familiar halo of white gold hair, about the only thing that stood out in the dim lighting. She headed right for it.

As they drew near, Dar raised her head and caught Harper’s eyes and smiled. "Well, well. It’s about time you return my partner. And in fairly good condition I see."

"Not a problem Dar. And thanks for taking such good care of my wife." Harper slid around Kerry and placed a kiss on a stunned Kelsey’s cheek. "Besides I don’t think Kerry likes me very much."

The two blond women were sporting identical expressions of disbelief. They blinked at each other then blinked at their respective companions who were smiling smugly.

Kerry managed to speak first. "You two are SO dead."

"Us!" Dar waggled a thumb between her and Harper. "Just who was trying to fool whom?"

"But …" Kelsey started.

"No buts!" Harper admonished.

"Guess we deserved that." Kerry finally admitted with a grin that crinkled her nose. She decided a subject change was in immediate order. "Don’t you love this bar?" She regarded her new friends. "Do you guys watch the show?"

Kelsey shrugged. "We don’t get a chance to watch as much television since the twins were born. They are their own entertainment, but yeah, we love the series."

"I really like the soulmate concept." Dar wrapped her arms affectionately around a blushing Kerry.

At that moment, the ‘Xena’ bartender ventured over to their end of the bar, blinked in surprise at the twin couples but regained some composure and smiled. "Would you ladies like anything to drink?"

"Not for me, thanks." Harper responded. "We’re just waiting for a table for dinner. But my friends might."

‘Xena’ gave the other three a great imitation of the famous brow arch. "Anyone else?"

They all declined with a shake of their heads and mumbled thanks. The warrior bartender grinned and moved on down the bar to attend to other customers.

Dar leaned in toward her double and lowered her voice. "Now that was not a woman either was it?"

Harper laughed and winked. "Now you’re catching on. I’m pretty sure Gabrielle is a woman though." She nodded toward the attractive blond at the other end of the bar.

"No matter. I think you and Dar look much more like Xena than she …uh ….he does." Kelsey tweaked her lover’s nose.

Harper winced. "I am not real sure that was a compliment."

"Well I am starving." Kerry announced. "Let’s debate the merits of Xena and today’s little adventure over dinner."

"Sounds good my little raisinette." Harper chuckled.

"You," Kerry drawled sweetly getting an inch from the woman’s nose and pointing at her chest, "have your own little raisinette." She shifted the finger in Kelsey’s direction.

Dar and Kelsey looked their confusion as they made their way past the tavern’s gawking patrons.

They were almost out the door when Kelsey spotted two life-size cardboard cutouts of Xena and Gabrielle, dress in their sexiest costumes. She slid up to the image of the blond bard and wrapped her arm around the image. "See any resemblance?"

"A little." Harper admitted. "But she’s not half as cute as you are."

"Ah huh. Good answer Tabloid." She smirked regarding the cardboard replica, poking it in the belly. "But who really has abs like this anyway?"

Dar scoffed and pinged the Xena cutout on the nose with thumb and index finger. "No one has eyes this blue either. It’s all special effects." They all moved out of tavern and into the restaurant.

There were gales of laughter floating around the large, wooden table the two couples had acquired in one corner of the restaurant. The remains of several lobsters and a couple empty wine bottles littered the space between them and they were all working on pieces of New York style cheesecake.

"She just kept calling me all these stupid, obnoxious endearments." Kerry was explaining while tears of laughter streamed down her cheeks. "Raisinette, cookie lips, PUMPKIN BUTT!"

Harper was grinning ear-to-ear looking extremely pleased with herself.

"And Dar was so boringly sweet I thought I was going to go into diabetic shock!" Kelsey added to the tales of their afternoon, dabbing her eyes with a napkin.

Kerry grinned at her lover. "Well when Dar walks into a boardroom the temperature drops about 30 degrees, but at home when we are alone, she is just a big teddy bear."

"Hey!" The teddy bear protested.

Harper snickered.

Kelsey’s eyes narrowed. "Don’t you dare be laughing Tabloid. Who was it that just had to talk to the twins on the telephone every night while that someone was away on assignment, hmmmm?"

"What is so odd about that?" Kerry inquired.

"They weren’t born yet."

Dead silence.

Then they all burst out laughing again. Harper gave an embarrassed shrug and blushed.

The four new friends spent a very enjoyable and surprisingly comfortable evening sharing stories from their separate afternoon perspectives, and of their lives in general. Even in their quiet corner of the restaurant they were on the receiving end of some veiled looks and quick double takes. They were an extremely interesting, attractive foursome.

Kerry raised her wine glass. "A toast. To new but very familiar friends and to the weirdest day of my life."

Four glasses clinked over the candle in the center of the table.

Harper set her glass down gently. "You two have got to promise me you’ll visit us in New Orleans. I have a very large family that I love to torment."

"It’s a deal." Dar’s eyes twinkled. "As long as you both join us in Miami and you, Harper, walk into a board meeting with me."

Kerry almost sprayed wine all over her partner. "Jesus Dar! José and Eleanor would spontaneously combust!"

"That’s the plan." A sly wink greeted her over a fork full of dessert.

"You are really evil. I love that about you."

"Heh."

Eleven o’clock was drawing near when the four women exited the restaurant into the warm night air. Commercial Street was still teeming with people laughing and enjoying the party atmosphere. They stopped outside on the walk and faced each other.

"Well it’s been …" Kerry began, "unique to say the least."

They all chuckled.

Dar suddenly felt Kerry stiffen beside her as fingers sank into her bare bicep.

"Eeeyow sweetheart what’s wrong?"

"Buh …" Kerry’s eyes were round with utter shock. The other three heads turned in the direction she was staring and issued a collective gasp. There was a strikingly handsome couple heading their way. They were holding hands and so completely involved with each other they were totally unaware they were being gawked at. They strolled by their stunned audience of four and part of their conversation was overheard.

"Ice, do you think we could find ourselves a nice bowl of lobster stew and a beer around here somewhere?" the green-eyed blond grinned up at a tall dark haired beauty whose blue eyes caressed her adoringly.

"Oh I think that can be arranged, my Angel." They moved on past.

"Dar!" Kerry gripped the arm she was latched onto and pulled. "We are SO out of this town!"

Kelsey hooked the front of Harper’s shirt in her fingers and tugged. "Hey wait for us!"

THE END

A special thank you to another one of my favorite uber couples, Ice and Angel for making a cameo appearance in my story and to their talented creator "Sword ‘n Quill" Sue Beck. Some of the locations mentioned in the story are real and some are imagined. The bit about Cher and Pee Wee Herman I witnessed with my own eyes. Thanks for reading.

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