Xena: Warrior Princess, Gabrielle, Argo and all other characters who have appeared in the syndicated series Xena: Warrior Princess, together with the names, titles and backstory are the sole copyright property of MCA/Universal and Renaissance Pictures. No copyright infringement was intended in the writing of this fan fiction. All other characters, the story idea and the story itself are the sole property of the author. This story cannot be sold or used for profit in any way. Copies of this story may be made for private use only and must include all disclaimers and copyright notices.
VIOLENCE WARNING/DISCLAIMER:
This story depicts scenes of violence and/or their aftermath and demonic possession. Readers who are disturbed by or sensitive to this type of depiction may wish to read something other than this story.
AUTHOR'S NOTE: This story contains many spoilers for Season Four of Xena,WP, especially the episode Devi. There are some spoilers for other Seasons of Xena as well, but nothing big.
This story is part Three of Hope Full, but can be read as a stand-alone story as well.
Please feel free to send comments, burnt or otherwise. Belobris@aol.com
HOPE FULL
By WLMcCord, (Bill the Semi Bard)(c)1999 (Revised 8-23-2000)
Book Three: Devi's, Demons and Deceits
Chapter One: The Call of Far Away Places
The short woman with hair the color of beaten copper and the tall dark warrior-woman leading the golden mare strode down the road away from the castle of King Melos. They walked along silently for a time, just enjoying the warm sun and watching the scenery as they moved.
Finally the tall woman spoke. "Gabrielle?"
"Hmmm?" The short woman poked her staff at a hovering dragonfly without looking at her friend.
The woman known throughout Greece as the Warrior Princess hesitated and her petite companion glanced up at her. She squinted and stopped walking. "What is it, Xena?"
The warrior stopped too and the golden mare she was leading came to a halt and made a questioning whicker. Xena stroked the horse's muzzle absently and spoke. "I, um, I'm glad you managed to repair your green top. I just wanted to say I was sorry, again..."
"Xena, that's over," said the bard kindly. "I'm not mad any more and there's no harm done; I came back didn't I?" She looked curiously at her friend. Xena was staring at the ground, showing no signs of moving on. "Was there ... something else?"
"I, uh, just wondered..." the warrior said and stopped.
"Wondered what?" Gabrielle leaned on the staff, watching her more curiously.
Xena looked uncomfortable. "Just ... well ... I wondered ... how come you never tell me your stories any more?" Her voice was almost plaintive.
The bard looked at her in surprise and the golden horse Argo snorted as if she were shocked.
The big warrior rushed on. "You always used to be so full of stories ... you'd be bursting to tell them and would always, you know, recite them to me as we traveled. Now you never even tell them in public anymore ... you didn't even seem to want to tell one to princess Alesia the other day."
Gabrielle pulled back her hair and gazed at the white fur on the end of her amazon staff for a moment before speaking. "I thought you were sorta just, well, um ... tolerating me," she said at last. "You know how you were always teasing me about my stories and telling me to leave you out of them ... I finally figured I shouldn't bother you with them anymore..."
Xena looked disappointed. "I-I thought you knew I WAS teasing," she said in a small voice. "I loved your stories, Gabrielle. They are some of the best times I remember about our travels together..."
The bard smiled and the expression lit up her face. "Thank you," she said modestly, a faint blush on her cheeks. "But really, Xena," she continued, "I don't have any new stories to tell. We do everything together. We've been traveling and sharing our adventures for so long that I'm living the stories I used to tell for my own enjoyment ... I guess I just ... sorta ... ran out of new tales to tell and I got tired of retelling the old ones. Sorry."
"Oh," said the warrior. "I guess that's true now I think about it ... still I wish..."
"You know what," said the bard suddenly, interrupting her friend. "Maybe we need to travel somewhere new for a change; somewhere different from Greece. Somewhere like the kingdom of Chin or someplace."
"Definitely not Chin," said Xena. She looked uncomfortable. "I dont think I ever want to go there again."
Gabrielle nodded. "I understand; too many memories. Besides, I didn't mean let's go to Chin, I'm not that fond of the place myself. And I certainly don't want to go back to Britannia..."
At the mention of Britannia both she and Xena shivered involuntarily. Then the bard's face brightened. "Hey! Here's an idea; how about India? We've never been there!"
"India? Yer kiddin', right?" The big warrior rubbed at a bruise on the arm that she had gotten climbing the vine out of a canyon with the little princess on her back.
"No, I'm not kidding. I hear that it is about as different as we could find. I'll bet you even know how to get there too!"
"Yeah," said Xena wryly. "You go east about as far as Chin. I don't think so."
"Oh, come on, Xena! Why not? I bet it'd be fun!" The bard almost danced with excitement and the warrior regarded her in surprised pleasure. "Let's do it. Let's go to India! Please?"
Xena hesitated and Gabrielle plunged on. "We'd get away from Greece and the same old things for a while. No more Ares, or Olympian gods, or Caesar, or feuding warlords. Think of the new things we could learn and see. I hear they sleep on beds of nails and keep snakes in baskets there. There'd be new sights and sounds, a whole different culture, the ... the new kinds of FOOD!" Her green eyes sparkled.
"Yeah, food. I wondered when you'd get around to the important part," Xena grunted and her friend grinned sheepishly.
"Well, you know how I like my food," the bard giggled.
"Yeah, on the plate and plenty of it," Xena smirked.
"All right, smarty," Gabrielle grinned, "but I also hear they have all kinds of mental disciplines there too, sorta like Lao Ma taught you. There's Yoga, the Kama Sutra, meditation..."
"Yoga?" The Warrior Princess teased. "You mean yogurt? We got that here in Greece; you talkin' about food again? And uh, I don't believe the Kama Sutra is in exactly the same class as meditation, although it CAN get you relaxed after a while..." she said slyly.
"Well, see there?" Gabrielle was eager. "We should learn it then ... gods know we could get stand to get relaxed..."
"BwaHahaahaahaaaaaaa!" She stopped as Xena exploded into a deep belly-laugh.
"What's so darn funny?" The bard sounded cross as she stared at her chortling partner.
"N-Never mind," snickered the warrior, gasping for air. "I was just picturing you getting r-relaxed w-with the Kama Sutra ... Oh, haw haw hawww!"
As Xena went off again, the bard narrowed her green eyes and gripped the staff in a way that suggested she was going to bounce it off someones head in another minute.
Noticing this, the big warrior hastily made a concerted effort to calm down. "S-Sorry ... heehee ... Ahem!" She wiped tears from her eyes with the back of her hand. "So, um, t-tell me more about this, uh, India idea..."
Chapter Two: I Remember You
The bard glared at her friend for a moment, but then continued on about the wonders both real and imagined that they might see on such a trip. As they walked the two women bantered back and forth with Gabrielle enthusiastically going on and on and Xena cheerfully poopooing everything she said.
Despite her outward show of disdain, as the bard chattered Xena found herself beginning to think about the trip as a real possibility. Even as traveled as she was, she had never been to India and it did sound interesting. Besides, she thought watching her animated friend, this was the first thing that Gabrielle had seemed truly excited about since ... Xena considered ... since the bard had been going to form a Hospice with Najara. And look how that idea had immediately gone to the dogs, she thought sadly.
Gabrielle had seemed to go into a funk after she had found out the truth about Najara. So much so that she had become almost hostile during the battle for the city of Actus. Xena still remembered how angry the bard had been when the warrior had tried to tell her about the vision that Alti had shown her of their future deaths by crucifixion. The young woman had flatly denied it could be true and refused to listen.
She was so angry in fact, that after Actus she left Xena and went home to Poteidaia for a visit with her family. Thus she had not been there when that business with Joxer and Meg and Autolycus and the baby-king-key had come up. Oh, Xena had handled it all right, but she had felt alone and unhappy without the bard at her side.
Gabrielle had come back afterward in a better frame of mind and the relieved Xena had decided they should just travel around a bit with no particular destination in mind. Then the next thing they knew they had become embroiled with the savage Horde again and barely escaped with their lives.
No, not the Horde, Xena corrected herself absently; they called themselves the Pomira. Despite their savage looks, they were very human warriors whose values were not so different from her own. During that whole time, Gabrielle had seemed distant and preoccupied, saying inappropriate and strange things. It had even been her idea to commit them to try and rescue the girl Pele from the Pomira. Against Xena's better judgment, she had agreed.
Carrying out that plan had almost caused a war between the city folk and the Pomira when the bard and warrior had rescued the girl and returned her to her true family in the city. Thank the gods that it had finally come out all right, although Xena still felt as if she personally had failed there. She had been forced to kill Milo the Hunter in the fight at the city gates. But he gave me no choice, she thought with both anger and sadness. He was exactly what I used to be; bigoted, angry and Hades on a chariot in a fight; killing him was like killing myself.
The death of Milo had so depressed the Warrior Princess that she had wanted only to sleep for a time. She overslept a number of days after, sometimes well into the morning. She would tell Gabrielle to wake her at the usual time if she didn't get up, but the bard kept letting her sleep in. The last day especially was the worst.
Xena had wanted to get up at first light to trap a warlord before he broke camp. The warrior had been so miffed to find she had been left yet again to oversleep, that she stole Gabrielle's beloved green top while the bard was bathing. She ripped it into strips for a rope to tie up the warlord when she captured him and made sure the bard knew it.
The petite woman was not happy of course and the episode had set off an all day squabbling match between the two friends. This was further complicated by the presence of the captured warlord, the bumbling Joxer, a little runaway princess and the interference of Aphrodite. After Xena had snippily implied that Gabrielle was only good for washing dishes, the bard had stormed off vowing never to return. They only got back together once both had finally apologized for treating each other with contempt rather than friendship.
Xena was startled out of her reverie by Gabrielle. "Well, What about it?"
Frantically the warrior tried to recall what she had been asked. "Uhhh ... well..." she temporized.
"Come on, Xena..." begged the bard. "Lets just DO it, huh? Let's just GO. Why shouldn't we? We don't have any missions to perform right now. It's been so long since we did something just for fun ... whatta'ya say?"
"I say 'It's getting towards evening and we should find a place to camp,'" the big warrior said, gazing about. "There, that looks like a possible spot. It's forested; there should be a coverlet back among those trees where we can hide our campfire from the road. Let's check it out."
"But what about India..."
"Gabrielle, let's just think about it, okay?" Xena refused to commit herself. "We don't have to leave tonight, do we?"
The bard was disappointed, but shrugged. "No, I guess not..." She sighed. "Okay then, lets see what these woods have to offer in comfort besides more sticks and stones to lie on and Bacchae sized mosquitos for company."
"Gabrielle..." Xena's voice was unhappy.
"I'm kiddin', okay?" The petite woman grinned. "The Athens palace it ain't, but it's what we got. It'll do for tonight."
Xena smiled and gripped her friend's shoulder and the bard covered the hand with her own for a moment, then she pulled Argo past Gabrielle toward the trees. It was when her back was turned that the bard's face suddenly twisted into a glare. The petite woman's eyes narrowed and her face went dead. For a moment it was as if a beautiful mask had been lifted to reveal a universe of pure hatred underneath. Then the expression relaxed and the bard looked normal once again as she followed the warrior and the horse towards the stand of trees.
Chapter Three: Night Camp and Inner Sadness
The woods had indeed proven to hide a good campsite. After making camp, the two women had eaten a filling dinner of jerked meat, mushrooms and cheese all cooked into a bubbling stew. Along with black bread and a salad of greens the bard had found while gathering firewood, they washed the food down with cold clear water from a nearby stream. After cleaning the cooking utensils Gabrielle had scribbled on a scroll by the firelight while Xena worked on repairing some seams and cuts on her leathers. Finally the bard rolled up the parchment and put her pens and ink away with a yawn.
"G'night, Xena." The small blond rolled into her blanket near the fire and relaxed for sleep.
"Night, Gabrielle. Pleasant dreams," Xena smiled. She began sharpening her sword as she usually did before going to bed. In the past few years she had so often needed it instantly upon awakening that she never put off doing the job till morning any more. Besides, it gave her a quiet time to reflect over the days events.
Gabrielle had seemed so happy today that it had come as a surprise to Xena. Uneasily she admitted to herself that the fact she was surprised that the bard was happy, was also a surprise. Her sharpening stone stopped in mid stroke as she thought uncomfortably about it. When had she started taking it for granted that her friend would not be happy? Gabrielle had always BEEN happy ... before. Before Dahak and Hope and Caesar and a dozen other things had changed her; taken away her innocence and left her sadder but wiser.
"Admit it, Warrior Princess," Xena thought with sorrow, "you fall into that category too."
She stared at her sword and sharpening stone as if she had never seen them before. She realized she wanted the old Gabrielle back, wanted her very much indeed. The Gabrielle that was so full of the joy of experiencing new things and places; the Gabrielle who was always laughing, smiling and telling stories. Could India possibly restore her?
"But she's gone," thought the warrior sadly. "I slowly killed her in a dozen ways. First when I took her to Britannia and both Caesar and Dahak got ahold of her. Caesar, the bastard, had her tied on a cross and we just barely saved her; but Dahak ... what that monster did to her..." Her eyes filled as she remembered Gabrielle floating over the altar in the demon's fiery grasp.
"She lost her blood innocence and even got pregnant by the demonic-scum..." Xena ground her teeth in rage. "When she gave birth to his daughter, she saw it as her hope for redemption. Then when she felt she had to lie to me about Hope's death to keep me from killing the little monster, she died a little that day..."
The warrior stared unseeing at the darkness. "As if that wasn't enough, just as things started to return to normal, that whole thing in Chin came up. We both made mistakes then ... big ones, but the worst was yet to come."
Xena closed her eyes in pain. "I blamed her for Solan's death when it was Callisto and Hope's fault. What was I thinking? SHE didn't kill my son, they did." The warrior pressed both hands to her face. "Then she gave her own daughter poison because I had said to ... that little bitch Hope deserved it, but oh, Gabrielle, you didn't deserve to have to do that and you died a little more..."
Xena's lips trembled and her breath was a sob. "Then, gods forgive me, I-I let Ares get to ME with his hatred and I tried to drag you to d-death behind an amazon horse and when that didn't finish you, I was going to throw you off a cliff into the sea."
The Warrior Princess opened her eyes and found her vision blurred by tears. She wiped at them furtively, glancing at where Gabrielle was wrapped in her blanket by the fire. As far as she could tell, the bard was asleep. The big woman looked up at the sky full of stars. Somewhere nearby there were night blooming blossoms that perfumed the air and she breathed deeply of their calming scent.
"Then came the miracle, Gabrielle, when my dear dead Solan came back to life long enough to take us to Illusia. There we managed to fight through our hatred and came back home healed." She thought back to when she and Gabrielle had frolicked in the warm waves on the beach and smiled softly for a moment.
"Everything seemed okay for a while, until I took you to Rome when I went up against Caesar again. You shouldn't have had to make that decision about Crassus on the spur of the moment, Gabrielle." The warrior stared at the guttering campfire. "Besides, that bastard Caesar knew who he was and chose to let him die in the arena, but you blamed yourself for it all and died some more..."
The fire snapped and the sleeping bard stirred but didn't wake up. Somewhere in the bush came the faint squeal of a mouse as a hunting owl silently swooped down for dinner. Elsewhere came a faint noise in the undergrowth as some small animal moved about its business. The leaves high in the trees rustled in a light breeze and a nut fell clicking to the ground as it hit branches on the way down. Absently the warrior's mind noted all the varied sounds, catalogued and dismissed them as no threat.
The Warrior Princess sighed softly. "After Crassus' death, when you talked in your sleep, I began to see just what I had done to you. Then I set it up so that you could go to the temple of Mnemosyne to forget everything including me if you chose to..." she blinked back sudden tears. "But you fought through that too and came back to me again ... thank the gods."
Xena grimaced. "Then when that bitch daughter of yours returned and Ares joined Dahak, you threw yourself and Hope into the volcanic pit to save me. When I thought you were dead, it almost destroyed me, but I found you again, Gabrielle."
The warrior looked at her hands. "Gods, I was SO happy to see you alive; even despite Alti's vision of our deaths. I thought all our troubles were over, but then it all started again. First it was Caesar trying to invade Greece, then there was that Shark Island Prison thing and then came Najara, damn her." Xena felt of her lower right jaw where a tooth was missing. "And now here we are ... we almost split up thanks to this whole stupid business with Aphrodite and that bratty little princess."
Xena frowned unseeing into the dark starry sky. "India ... maybe we SHOULD go see someplace new again." She slid her sword back into the sheath and yawned as she glanced around the quiet camp one last time. Then she snuggled into her own blanket and lay looking toward her sleeping friend as she began to doze off. Her last thoughts before falling asleep were, "Yeah, India ... why not?"
Chapter Four: A Taste of Freedom
As if she had been under water and was coming up for air, Gabrielle felt herself rising to the surface. Up, up she floated, until ... she blinked. By the gods! She had blinked! She could feel her eyelids go down, then back up. Something soft red and golden glowed in her vision; the campfire burning low. She ... she could see! Sounds of the night jumped into almost painful clarity in her ears. She could hear crickets! In the brush was a faint crackle of some small animal foraging. She could hear Argo somewhere cropping some grass as a late snack and ... she could hear Xena breathing deeply as she slept nearby.
Now, the bard could feel the cool night air on her skin ... Oh, Zeus! She had forgotten all the feelings. Grassy humps under her ground sheet, something she had used to hate, but now she found it almost sensual. The scent of the charcoal from the low smoldering campfire and the sweet smell of earth and night air was like some rare incense as she breathed it in gratefully.
"Xena," she thought suddenly. "Good gods, you fool! Don't just lay here sniffing the breeze! You gotta warn Xena about Hope! Get up, get UP!"
Gabrielle pushed herself up with heavy forearms, struggled to get to her feet. Somehow she made it and swayed with the unaccustomed feel of making her muscles move for herself again. Hope had been in control of her for too long. She took a step towards the sleeping warrior ... and her foot caught in the tangle of her blankets. She fell with a clang into the nearby camp supplies, sending Minya's frying pan flying. The painful landing knocked the wind out of her.
"Xena-" she managed to gasp out, but she didn't need to. At the noise of her fall, the tall warrior was already out of her blankets in a half crouch. Sword at the ready she spun about looking for enemies. Seeing none, she turned to her struggling friend.
"Gabrielle?" She was concerned. "What is it? Are you all right?" The big woman moved towards the gasping bard, looking worried.
"Xena," the bard wheezed, trying to get her breath, "It's me..." Then came the swirl of darkness closing in around her mind as her daughter emerged from deep inside of her again.
"No, you don't, mother," the insidious darkness that was her daughter Hope whispered in her brain as it clamped down on her vocal cords. "That's not the plan!"
Gabrielle wanted to scream, kick, and thrash, but lost control as Hope pushed her down inside of herself once again.
"No, it's not fair, noooooo," she screamed silently to no avail. Outside her body Xena helped the trembling bard to her feet.
"Gabrielle, what's wrong," she asked with worry. "Are you all right?"
"Watch this, mother dear," said Hope's snide thought inside the bard.
She collapsed against the warrior, crying wildly, "Where am I, where are they? Oh, Xena, stop them; if the priests sacrifice Sarafin, Hope will be loose from her cocoon!"
Xena pulled the sobbing bard against her and cuddled her tenderly. She spoke in a soothing voice. "Gabrielle. Come on, Gabrielle. Sarafin isn't here, she's safe back in Poteidaia; we saved her and Hope's dead! That was all months ago." Tenderly she stroked the bard's hair. "You were having a nightmare and I think you were walking in your sleep as well..."
"Nightmare? What?" Firmly in control, Hope spoke through Gabrielle's mouth, pretending confusion. "Oh, by the gods! It ... it was a d-dream? The temple, the sacrificial pit. It was so real. Or ... is this the dream?" She looked around sobbing wildly and trembled convincingly against the large woman who held her with tenderness. Inwardly, Hope was laughing with pleasure; Gabrielle watched it all take place as she had so many times now since Hope had taken control of her body that night in Poteidaia and felt sick.
"Shhh. Shhh." Xena held her close with comforting arms and laid her chin on the blond's head. "I gotcha, I gotcha. Yer okay. Don't cry, yer awake now. A dream can't hurt you."
"Oh, Xena," Hope sniffled, snuggling closer and allowing her sobs to slow. "You are so g-good to me. I-I don't know what I would d-do without you."
"Damn you, Hope," groaned the submerged bard. "You are so smug."
"That's right, mother dear," whispered her daughter with black joy, "and I'm in control again, so you may just as well relax and enjoy the show."
Outside, Xena smiled and spoke gently. "Gabrielle, I've been thinking and I've made a decision. If you still want to, I think the India trip is a great idea. Tomorrow we'll pick up supplies in the next town and start right out. Okay?"
Hope allowed herself to smile tearfully up at her enemy. "Really? We can? Oh, Xena, that would be so great." She hugged the pleased warrior. "You ARE good to me and we'll have a wonderful time ... I just know it."
"I'm sure we will," smiled the warrior, ruffling her friend's hair. "Do you feel like trying to sleep again? It's still hours till dawn."
"I think so," murmured Hope, faking a yawn. "Could I sleep next to you? I-I'd feel safer I think..."
"Sure," Xena said. "Here, come on. Bring your blanket over by mine."
In frustration Gabrielle watched from inside as Hope moved her body around, getting the blankets and snuggling down next to Xena, back to back. On that side of the fire lay Minya's fallen frying pan and the cook knife. The blade gleamed dully in the glow from the embers.
"Ohhh, mother, look at that..." purred the Hope thought, "It would be soooo easy. Once she's asleep ... swickkkk! Across the throat with the cook knife and it'd all be over ... and we could watch her dying eyes as she realized it was sweet little you that had killed her!"
Gabrielle was terrified, but quelled her fears, knowing that Hope was just trying to torment her. "Sure, go ahead," she thought-said disdainfully. "Then it WILL be over and I won't have to listen to you play your lousy little head-games any more. Go on; finish it. Then I won't have to go to India with you and watch you pull more of your crap."
"Oh, no you don't," said the darkness, disappointed. "You are NOT getting out of this that easy. I haven't done nearly enough to either of you yet and India might be a very good place for stuff to happen in."
"Whatever," thought the bard, pretending disinterest to hide the relief she felt. She continued trying to keep her daughter's mind off of killing Xena. "By the way, why did you bring up India anyhow? What was the point of that?"
"It was 'cause when Xena asked me why I didn't tell stories anymore, I had to change the subject quick," Hope grumbled. "I'm no good at making up those stupid tales that you like; I've got more important things on my mind. I just said the first thing I could think of to distract her ... and she's so dumb she went for it."
"Clever you," Gabrielle mentally snorted. "You don't like to tell stories, but LYING now; you're sure GOOD at that. Your father certainly taught you well, didn't he?"
"Oh, shut up," snarled the daughter of Dahak and the bard subsided, grateful that her ploy had worked. Hope grumbled for a bit more then quieted down. As she drifted off into sleep Gabrielle couldn't help but be a little excited at the prospects of the trip ahead.
"India..." she thought, surprised at her own eagerness. "We've never been there before ... and maybe, just maybe I can find a way to get loose while Hope is distracted..."
Chapter Five: Stresses and a Victory
It was dawn and the woods were cool with dew and the smells of woody things. Birds were already rustling breakfast and singing industriously as they found the various worms, bugs, berries or seeds that they loved. In the camp too, the occupants were busy. Xena was doing her morning exercises and the bard was cooking some eggs and leftover jerky and greens into an omelet for two. Argo was alternately rubbing her back against a tree and nipping up a tasty patch of tender new grass she had found.
As the bard stirred the eggs and ingredients in Minya's frying pan, it seemed she was completely engrossed in her work, but nothing was further from the truth. Inside her was a constant struggle as Hope mocked and tormented her mother with words, mental images and ugly thoughts.
"So, mommy," snickered Hope, "how did you like the way I stuck it to Xena the other day when I had her convinced you were leaving over her tearing up that stupid green top of yours?"
Gabrielle refrained from answering. Gone was the optimism of last night when
she had gone to sleep dreaming of India. First thing this morning it had started
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