Chapter LIV

The cacophony of sound that was prevalent throughout the room dropped to dead silence when Eli and Arianna crossed into the mess hall.  Then as one, the rest rose and cheered, even as they made their way over to where the two had paused at the doorway.  Though they had not been unhappy with Eden ’s leadership, they all knew how she loathed being ‘that guy ’ .  She much preferred to utilize her strength to back up Eli.  Besides, they were glad beyond words to have Eli returned to them whole and unharmed... especially having seen what she had been and how damaged her partial transformation had left her.

Eli accepted their hugs and good wishes with barely a grimace, knowing they came from a place of love and concern.  Hannah was the last to step forward, and Eli cupped her face before moving her hands to stroke her ears, eyebrow raised in question.  Hannah smiled, though it took everything in her power not to start at the golden, slitted eyes staring back at her. She was surprised no one had commented on them, then realizing it was entirely possible no one beyond the ones who already knew had noticed.  After all... they had been giving and receiving hugs – not being examined by their primary physician.  She squeezed Eli ’s hands with her own before signing as she spoke in a very hushed tone.  “I ’m all right.  My hearing returned with a vengeance, and it was overwhelmingly disorienting, so I ’m having to relearn....”  She shook her head.  “I ’ve got my strongest earplugs in right now, so I can ’t actually hear very much of anything – it ’s why I am whispering.  I ’m trying to modulate my tone to keep from yelling at everyone, and I ’m having to do it by feel, so to speak.  I ’m going to slowly reintegrate filtered sound back in my life.  It will probably take a couple more days at least.”

The others weren ’t surprised by her signing; after all, she had been doing it with them since the moment she ’d regained consciousness and understood that Luke had placed a barrier around her to protect her hearing until she could decide on a course of action.  What did surprise them was when she stopped and lifted her hands to Eli ’s face, tilting her head and looking directly into her eyes before speaking again.  “How are you?”

Eli shrugged.  Been better, she signed.  Wishing I had remembered this before now, with a glare at Eden.  Why didn ’t you say something?  You could have reminded me!

Eden glared back before raising an imperious eyebrow.  “How was I supposed to know what you remembered?!  Besides, I didn ’t actually think about it. It ’s been a long couple of days, all right??” with a hint of heat and anger behind her words. 

Before Arianna could get her hackles up to respond, Eli intercepted her with a hand on her shoulder and a shake of her head.  “But Querida....”

Eli shook her head again and drew Arianna to her before she started signing again.  She ’s right, Beloved.  She had no way of knowing what I remembered.  And it HAS been a long couple of days... especially for those that have been up working around the clock.  We were lucky – we got a break.

Arianna snorted.  “I wouldn ’t actually call it a break.”

Eli gave a small smile.  Nor would I, by any other definition, but you and I have both had some sleep while the others have been working and scrambling to get everything back in working order. *I*should have remembered, though.  I ’m the one that asked to learn sign language in the first place, remember?

“I suppose,” Arianna grumbled.  “But that means I should have remembered as well.”  She exhaled and turned to Eden.  “Sorry, Eden.  It ’s certainly not your fault we all forgot.  And at least Hannah has reminded us.”

Eden nodded curtly, but she still didn ’t speak.  She was still smarting a little bit over the fact that both Eli and Arianna wanted to blame her, and she knew if she answered verbally right now, she ’d be likely to attack.  Instead, she turned her back and took a seat at the nearest table, silently indicating she was ready to get this meeting started and finished.

Eli motioned everyone else to take a seat and walked to the table where Eden sat with her arms crossed over her chest.  She waited patiently for Eden to cut those deep, black eyes at her, and she opened her arms.  Eden just looked at her.  Eli cocked her head in supplication.  Eden rolled her eyes and sighed, then leaned into Eli ’s embrace.  She closed her eyes and accepted the silent apology and comfort Eli offered, not at all surprised when she felt Arianna sit on her other side and surround her with warmth.

“We ’re sorry, Eden,” Arianna said contritely.  “You stepped up in a big way, and we both appreciate that... so much.  We shouldn ’t have expected you or anyone else to remember what we didn ’t.”

“I feel kind of stupid that I didn ’t,” she mumbled.  “After all, we ’ve been using it with Hannah for a little while already.”

“You ’re not allowed to feel stupid.  Because of you feel stupid, then I have to feel stupid, and I don ’t like the way stupid feels.  I much prefer awesome!” added with an impish grin Eden could feel despite not being able to see it.  She snorted in an effort not to laugh out loud.

“Yeah, I can see why you ’d prefer it,” she said sarcastically.  She sighed with contentment before subtly nudging both of them away from her.  “All right.  Let ’s get this circus on the road, because I know everyone else is as tired as I am, and a little rest will do us all some good.”

Eli nodded and removed her arms from around Eden ’s torso before she stood.  Arianna simply grabbed her hand and pulled Eden into a more sitting position, though she never released the hand she held.  Eden looked at her askance, and tugged lightly.  Arianna just held on firmly.

“Nope... not letting go.  You ’re stuck with me until we tuck you guys in.”

Eden wanted to frown or growl or something equally off-putting, but all she could manage was a tired, little smile.  She returned a tiny squeeze of acknowledgement to Arianna ’s hand, then sat back and waited for Eli to begin.

Okay, she signed.  First things first.  As you are now aware, my ability to speak has not actually returned to me yet.  I haven ’t truly completed my metamorphosis back to my humanoid form.  My eyes and my voice seem to be retaining their more draconian qualities, which leaves me with exceptional eyesight and less than stellar oral communication abilities.

“And yet you still manage to sign all those big, complicated words,” Eden snarked with a smile.  Eli stuck out her tongue, much to amusement of the others.

“Girlfriend, I ’d be more concerned if she didn ’t.  At least we know we ’ve got our Eli back.  Her vocabulary ’s never been lacking.”  Eli grinned brightly.

“True that,” Deborah agreed.  “How ’s that going to impact on your ability to lead?  Wait....” she instructed, holding up her hands before the murmuring or questions could start.  “I ’m not looking to lead this bunch again.  We ’ve already seen how that works out,” looking around the room at her fellow teammates.  “I ’m asking because it could be a bit problematic if Eli can ’t actually speak to give directions and orders.  Imagine if she ’d been in this position when all the crap we just went through went down.  Eden was screaming orders.  Eli can ’t even speak, much less scream.  How would she have given orders??”

“She ’s got a point,” Danny offered.  “I ’m not sure we would have survived without Eden ’s rather...  vehement... guidance.  But we all know everyone, including Eli and especially Eden, are more comfortable with Eli at the helm.”

“May I speak?” Cupid asked, standing from his place in the back of the room.  He waited for Eli to motion him to the floor.  He accepted her acquiescence with a graceful nod and stepped forward.  “I realize you guys don ’t know me, but I ’ve been around in your world for a very long time.  And in that time, I ’ve had the opportunity to learn a lot of things about a lot of things.  I ’ve actually served in your militaries through several lifetimes, so I know a little bit about command and command structure.  Now, I ’m not proposing a coup or anything, but since Mom and I are going to stay up and help Eli and Arianna while you guys get some sleep, I want you to know I am ready and capable of stepping in if there is an emergency that would require screaming orders.  But that would only be in an emergency, and only while you guys are resting.  Otherwise, I am content to just be another cog in the wheel.”

“He ’s telling the truth,” Abigail confirmed with a look at Eli, who chanced to wonder at the uncomfortable expression in Abigail ’s blue eyes.  But as Abigail had never given them a reason to mistrust her, she dismissed it as her imagination almost immediately.  Then her attention was taken by Luke, as he cut into her thoughts with his statement.

“Eli and I are going to sit down together when I get up and see what we can come up with to fix this situation. We ’re going make this a priority... to figure out what tests to run... what solutions we can find, but I ’m convinced we can make this better.”

“And in the meantime?”

“And in the meantime,” Eden stated firmly as she looked around the room.  “Eli is still our leader.  If and when she needs me to speak for her, I will, but otherwise, she ’s in command.  Period.”

“I concur with Eden,” Arianna said.  “Let ’s assume... hope... that nothing horrific is going to happen to us for a little while – long enough for Eli and Luke to work their magic and give her her voice back.  Then the problem will be moot.  And if something does happen, Eden is more than qualified to step in and take over.”

“Okay,” Deborah conceded with her hands held out.  “I just wanted to know.”

It was a fair question, Deb, Eli signed.  Thank you for asking.  And as for Cupid ’s offer, I ’m okay with it if everyone else is.  He ’s shown sufficient knowledge to be an asset to us and both he and Aphrodite really stepped up to help us... ME... out.  Since Gay doesn ’t sense anything amiss with him and his words ring true, I don ’t think we would do wrong trusting him.

“Agreed.”
“Okay.”
“Sounds good.”
“Right on.”

It seems we have a consensus, Eli signed with a delighted smile.  That being said, I think it ’s time for all of you to go and get some rest.  I don ’t want to see anyone for at least the next eight standard.  If you need longer, take it.  If you find you can ’t sleep that long, please at least remain in your rooms and relax.  We can ’t do much to repay what you all have done for us, but....

“Uh... no,” Eden said firmly.  “There is no talk of repayment here... real or imagined.  We are family – we stand together and for one another.  It ’s not like you and Arianna wouldn ’t and haven ’t done the same for us before, and you know what Jake would say: It all comes out clean in the dish soap.”

Cupid chuckled.  “It all comes out in the wash,” he corrected softly while shaking his head.  “I had a um... friend who used that saying a lot during one of my incarnations on Jake ’s planet.  It meant it would all work out in the end.  His culture has a lot of peculiar and unusual idioms.”

Eden snorted.  “That ’s the truth.  Took me the longest time to realize Jake was calling them idioms and not idiots,” garnering her laughter from around the room.  “They ’re known as proverbs in my culture. Although, in fairness – ours don ’t seem to be quite as vague nor as colorful.”

“In the meantime,” Arianna interrupted politely, but with a firm, cool tone, “it ’s time for you guys to go get some sleep.  We ’ve still got a lot to do before we get back to the Nebula, and we ’re all going to need to be at peak efficiency to get things done so we can finally go home.  I can ’t speak for the rest of you, but I ’m ready to be done with this adventure.  I ’m ready to settle down and build our new civilization.”

“Amen!”
“Hallelujah!”
“Preach, Sistah!”
“Hear! Hear!”

“All right,” Eden said, rising to her feet and motioning the rest to start moving.  “We ’re out of here for now.  But you call us if you need us for anything.  I think we ’re all about ready to be done with all this and just start living.  Goodnight, guys,” she bade as she stepped from the mess hall.  The rest followed her with exhausted enthusiasm, returning her words, and waving to Eli and Arianna on their way out.  After a moment, there were only the four of them left.  Cupid and Aphrodite turned to Eli and awaited her instruction.

All right, Eli signed.  Cupid, if you ’ll go with Arianna down to the engine room, the two of you should be able to pick up where the rest of the engineers left off.  I know she ’s going to want to check out her reactor... even briefly... and there are still a few secondary systems that need testing.  She looked at him squarely, and Cupid returned the glance, despite an innate desire to look away to keep himself hidden from her.  It was an odd feeling – wanting her to recognize him, and desperate to make sure she never discovered his truth.  He rolled his mental eyes.  Sometimes being human really sucked.  Then she was signing again, and he forced himself to pay close attention.  I ’m counting on you to know your business.  Please don ’t let me down.

“I won ’t, Eli.  I ’ve done a lot of stupid things on the lifetimes I ’ve lived, but I ’ve never deliberately put anyone in danger.  Kinda not my gig.”

“I ’d like to hear more about that, actually,” Arianna stated.  “About the lifetimes you ’ve lived, I mean.  Were you still the God of Love... able to influence peoples ’ feelings or make them fall in love?”

“Oh... that was never our deal,” Aphrodite spoke up.  “We just put the circumstances into play – we never made people fall in love.  And soulmates like you two are?  Yeah... that was TOTALLY out of our hands.”

“That much I figured... given the bet that was made.”  Arianna waved her hands.  “Doesn ’t matter now; it ’s in the past.  Done and over.  But I ’d still kind of like to hear about your lifetimes among humanity,” she requested of Cupid.  “If there are things you can share.”

“I ’m sure I can find plenty to talk about,” Cupid replied.  “After all, I had a front row chair for a lot of history... at least the history that happened on Jake ’s planet.  And that eventually tied into the histories of all the Alliance planets.”

As lovely and interesting as that sounds, Eli signed dramatically to reclaim their attention, we need to address the immediate needs of getting this ship back online and secured.  The sooner we get that finished, the quicker we can get you back to your family.  And the sooner we can make our way to our new home.  I ’m sure there ’ll be plenty of time to talk on the journey, but for now....

Arianna grasped her hands.  “Sorry, Amado.  You know how I get.”

Eli gently removed her hands from Arianna ’s grasp and cupped her face, nodding her agreement even as she brushed a kiss over her forehead.  Then she smiled and rubbed her behind particularly, grinning when Arianna squealed and moved out of reach.

“I ’ll get you for that,” mock glaring as she continued to back away.  Eli ’s grin grew impossibly wider.  “Come on, Cupid.  We ’ve got work to do.”

Cupid knew an order when he heard it, and without hesitation followed her quickly from the room.  Aphrodite and Eli both waved goodbye before Eli erupted in peals of laughter.  Aphrodite just tilted her head in question.  Eli signed her response and Aphrodite couldn ’t help but laugh.

“An erogenous zone, huh?  And she ’s going to have to wait at least eight hours before you two can…?” watching Eli nod vigorously with a devilish twinkle in her eye.  “You are a wicked, evil woman.”  She chuckled.  “Gotta love it.”  She looked around the now empty mess hall.  “So what now, Captain?”

Eli rolled her eyes, but jerked her head as she started out the door.  Aphrodite followed her as a matter of course, and soon the two were exiting the lift onto the bridge.  Eli motioned for Aphrodite to look around, even as she stepped forward to review the information on the instruments in front of her.  A glance told her where they were – which caused her brows to jump up her forehead; they ’d been flung quite the distance from where they ’d been.  Now she understood the travel estimates of at least a week.

Aphrodite came around to stand beside her, eyes widening when she noted their position.  “Wow!” she said softly.  “We really did get thrown for a loop, didn ’t we?” Eli nodded.  Aphrodite edged past her and took a seat.  “Orders?”

Eli looked around, then lifted the Pads that her teammates had left for her to peruse from the Captain ’s chair and sat down.  Contact the engine room, she signed.  Find out the estimate for bringing everything back online.  We can ’t really do much until Arianna gives us the go ahead to use the engines.

“I was just going to call you,” Arianna said by way of greeting when Aphrodite opened communications with the engine room.  “I ’m going to bring the reactor fully back online.  Cupid is running diagnostics of the few secondary systems the boys hadn ’t already checked, but the reactor looks good, and all the testing has been completed on it.”

“Eli says, ‘Do it, Beloved ’ ,” Aphrodite interpreted for Arianna as Eli signed.  “I have already laid in the course and speed she gave me to start our journey back to the Nebula.  We ’re starting slow and will increase our speed as you feel comfortable doing so, Arianna.”

“Sounds good.  All right,” she added with a heavy sigh.  “Here goes nothing,” and with the press of a few keys, the familiar hum spread throughout the ship.  It brought a smile to the lips of all those aboard – awake and aware as well as sleeping.  It was a comfort they had sorely missed in the brief time they had been without it.

“Captain reports, ‘Everything looks good on this end so far.  Readings are normal and steady.  Slowly increase speed and power in measured increments until we reach maximum speed and power.  Keep us advised of any noticeable changes or fluctuations and we will do the same ’ ,” Aphrodite translated without hesitation.  Eli gave her a nod and a pleased smile.

“Will do, bridge.  Engine room out,” Arianna replied before she closed the comm link.  Then she moved into the reactor room itself and began a visual inspection and audio scan.  She intended to ferret out the tiniest irregularity and resolve it before it became a bigger issue.  The sooner things were back on track, the sooner they could be done with this whole, unplanned detour that had disrupted, well... practically everything, and get back to the task that had been set out for them to accomplish.  She was tired – she was confident they all were – and ready for life to go their way for a change.  Surely they were due a break or two from the insanity.  Then she snorted.  She knew the likelihood of insanity NOT traveling with them was pretty slim.  Some people just attracted trouble, and it seemed like this team had more than its share... though she knew they would point fingers at her and Eli.

That thought made her smile and giggle softly to herself.  If nothing else, this detour had shown her what they were and what they could become... together.  That alone made it almost worth it.  Almost... because it didn ’t seem fair that the rest had been caught up in their craziness.  Then she heard soft footfalls behind her and sighed, reminded that they still weren ’t completely past it yet, though now it was mostly a matter of getting their two unwitting guests back to their home.  Still, there was something off about them... about Cupid at least.  She knew what she had seen between him and Gay before Eli ’s transformation.  Maybe now was the time to get to the bottom of that particular mystery.

Chapter LV

“So, Cupid,” Arianna started, the inflection on his name making him jerk his head up in question and garnering his attention in a most unpleasant manner.  “Who are you, really??”

Blue eyes bulged and his jaw dropped to the ground briefly before he recovered himself and forced his expression into a neutral mask.  “I ’m not sure.... What do you mean?”

She glared at him for a quick second before schooling her countenance into a scarily, sickly sweet smile.  “Just so you know, before you continue to talk yourself into a well you may never find a way out of – I am considered a fairly intelligent individual.  And I ’ve learned, since my inclusion on this project, how to watch and observe those around me.  It ’s how I started to understand how to integrate into society and be an accepted part of things.  All that observation has taught me to pay attention... to pick up unspoken clues and nuances of expression so I can be a welcomed participant in conversations and situations instead of someone merely tolerated.”  She paused for breath as she studied him, noting the subtle hints that her suspicions were more than a little on target.  She huffed a bit. “Now, having said that, I ’m going to offer you one opportunity to be honest with me.  Who are you, really, and why do you not want Eli to know?”

He sighed.  “Who do you think I am?”

She glared.  “Really?  You want to play this game??”  She glared again and sighed.  “All right.  I do think you are the God of Love... or were,” feeling him flinch at the casualness of her last statement.  “But you yourself said you have lived lifetimes... implying you have been around for a long time and as a number of individuals.  And I know Gay recognized you – I saw you shake your head at her to keep from giving away who or what she thought you were.  And I ’m betting the one person you might not want to find out you ’ve been lying is my Amado... because she ’s proven both willing and able to defeat a god.  So who have you been to Eli?  The only person truly close to her that is missing is....”  Arianna ’s eyebrows furrowed in consternation as her mind connected the pieces she ’d been voicing aloud.  She looked up at Cupid with angry brown eyes.  “You ’re Elijah??”

“Well, I was,” Cupid admitted with a sense of defeat.  He had a feeling this wasn ’t going to end well, and a sharp punch to his chest caused him to cough and step back.  “What...??” catching both of Arianna ’s fists as they flew at him in abandon.  “If you ’d... just... give me... a chance... to... explain....” wrestling with her to keep her from hitting him again without doing damage to either of them in the process.

“Explain?!?  Explain what, exactly??  You were her brother... her best friend!!  And when you died....  Do you know the guilt she carries to this day over your death??  The responsibility she feels because she wasn ’t there to stop you... or at least be by your side??”  She jerked a hand from his and punched him again.

“OW!” he exclaimed, wrapping his arms around her and pulling her against his chest.  “That actually hurts!”

“It was supposed to!” she growled, vainly trying to escape his grip.  “Be thankful I didn ’t fight like a girl,” she added with a sneer.  “I would have hit you somewhere a lot more delicate.”

In reflex, he crossed his legs, and the shift was just enough to allow her to get out of his grasp.  She stood back and crossed her arms over her chest, glaring at him.  “Let me tell you how this is going to play out.  We ’re going to stay here and monitor engine room and the reactor just like we ’re supposed to.  But when the Alpha Team wakes up and is able to resume their duties, you, me and Eli are going to sit down and have a little chat.”

Cupid sighed and nodded slowly.  “I promised Ellie... Eli, I would explain everything to her if she could remember....” He broke off before finishing his thought.

“If she could remember what exactly?”

He sighed again and pinched the bridge of his nose between finger and thumb before rubbing an anxious hand down his face.  “Gods... is this what it ’s like to be human without god powers?  I never had this much issue with it before.  I never meant... I shouldn ’t have said....”  He huffed.  “Look, when she was out there fighting Mischief in her dragon form, I had to go into her unconscious mind to help heal her enough to get us away from the Storm Surge before it blew us to kingdom come.  She recognized me as Elijah then, and I promised her I would explain it to her if she could remember once she returned to her humanoid state.”

Arianna narrowed her eyes.  “You ’re probably the reason she ’s stuck between forms,” glaring at him the longer she thought about it.  “This never happened to her before, so it stands to reason....”

“Now wait just a minute!  What do you mean this is my fault?? Need I remind you that my whole family and I sacrificed pretty much everything we had to help you kids out??”

“Help us out of a situation you created and perpetuated in the first place!!”

Cupid had the grace to look slightly abashed at the accusation, but he still couldn ’t just let it go without trying to justify his actions.  He couldn ’t see how he could possibly be to blame for Eli ’s current condition and was determined to defend himself.  “Besides, how do you know it ’s never happened to her before??  It ’s not like you know everything about her.”

“Be very careful, Little Man,” she addressed him in a tone of cold, quiet fury.  “I ’d suggest you tread extremely lightly, because I have only the slightest compunction not to put you into a tube and launch you back out into space.”

Cupid smirked.  “Yeah??  You and what army?” moving closer until he was towering over her.

He never even saw her move, but he definitely felt it when she grabbed him by the jewels.  He froze in place, hoping his stillness would encourage her to not tighten her grip.  “For the record,” she growled low in her throat, “I don ’t need an army.  I can take care of you just fine on my own.  My Amado taught me how to defend myself.  But I guarantee you – if I tell the others who you are or have been or whatever... about the games you ’ve been playing with us and with her – I ’ll have an army that will destroy you and the family we ’re taking you back to.”  She twisted slightly and he grimaced, but bit his lip to keep from making a sound.  “You don ’t mess with my family.  Understood?”

He nodded vigorously, and her smile was grim in return.

“All right then.  We ’re going to try this again... this time like civil, adult human beings.  You won ’t try to intimidate me, and I won ’t have to threaten you and your family.  Are we clear?”

“Crystal,” he replied without a hint of a smile.

“Good... because next time, I won ’t be so nice.”

He cleared his throat and looked at her, waiting until she nodded for him to speak.  “May I ask why you are assuming I am the cause of Ellie ’s... Eli ’s inability to complete her transformation?”

“Cupid, you can call her Ellie if you want.  I know who you mean, but I ’ll remind you it ’s a dead giveaway as to your previous relationship with her.  No one but Elijah ever called her that.”

“I know.  It was kind of our thing,” he said softly.  “Our mother... MaTb... always called her Elizabeth, and the rest just called us both by Eli, because they knew where one of us was, the other was near.  And it was easier just to use the one name since we were generally both wanted together by whoever was doing the calling.”

“It never caused confusion?”

Cupid shrugged.  “Sometimes... especially as we grew older and had different interests and responsibilities.  But the fact was, even, then, we were almost always together until she went into training for this project and I took a mate and settled down.”

“How did you do that, anyway?  Your people – her people – only mate once, and it ’s for life.  And you obviously....”  She waved her hands to finish her thought.

“If I answer your questions, will you answer mine?  I really am curious to know why you think I ’m the cause of Eli ’s” – stressing the name – “stunted transformation?  I really didn ’t do anything.”

“But you did.  You showed yourself to her as Elijah.”

“Annnnd...??”

“And, the truth is, she probably doesn ’t want to know the truth... at least on some level.  That subconscious knowledge is what ’s keeping her from transforming properly. As long as she ’s not fully humanoid, she can avoid facing you as anyone but Cupid.”

“You really think...?”

“Yes.  Let me re-emphasize to you how important Elijah was to her.  He was her best friend; her confidante; her strength; and her protector.  I know....”  She stopped him with a raised hand.  “She was stronger and faster and smarter.  But she relied on him... on YOU... so much.  It nearly crushed her when he... you died.  Why would you do that??  And how did you manage to take a mate??”

Cupid looked around the engine room briefly while he formulated his answer. After a moment, he took a deep breath and carefully leaned back against a console, crossing his arms over his chest.  He winced slightly at the bruising he could feel – he hadn ’t realized humanity was going to be quite as painful as it was starting out to be.  Hopefully, honesty would keep Arianna from attacking him again. With that thought, he let his eyes meet hers again, and swallowed reflexively at the impatience and frustration he could see radiating in her expression and posture.  He drew in a sharp breath.

“I need to start from the beginning – from when I was cast into the Void.”

“Wait... you were cast into the Void?  I thought you left trying to get back to your home.”

Cupid snorted softly.  “Not exactly.  Though I don ’t think it was entirely intentional either.  You have to understand – when we arrived at the Nebula, there was a lot of anger and confusion and panic.  We didn ’t know where we were or how we got there, and we certainly had no inkling of how we were going to get home.  There was a lot of blaming and finger pointing.  We tried... oh gods... any number of things – teleporting; star charting; actual space travel.  You name it, we probably tried it at least once... no matter how ridiculous it appeared to be.  Remember, as immortals, we knew we ’d find a way eventually – it was only a matter of time.

The problem was that no one wanted to take the time... waste the time... to figure it out.  We just wanted to go home and resume what little bit of power we were able to gather from the different elements of humanity.”

“Is there a point here somewhere?” Arianna interrupted impatiently.

Cupid glared a little, but relented when he recognized the anxiety in her eyes.  “Actually, yes.  I just want you to have a good understanding of what it was like.  Lots of bickering and anger and unhappiness.  All that eventually meant Zeus decided we needed some games – kind of like the Olympics, but you know... with actual Olympians.  Anyway, at one point, we were running a race in and out of the Nebula, and Ares and I were going at it neck and neck – pushing and shoving one another as we jostled for the best position.  As we were coming around by the Void – the wormhole, as I now know it – he pushed.  I fell in.  When I finally came to my senses, I was back home.  Or well, as close as I had been for so long.  But it wasn ’t really home... not anymore.  It had changed, and so had I.  So I decided to do some exploring.”

“Did you try to go back through the wormhole?”

“I did... or I would have if I could have found it again.  But I didn ’t know what it was or where it was, for that matter.  Time and technology and mankind had passed us all by while we were gone, and I had to catch up.  So I went to school, and then I went to war.  It was nothing like....  I know you don ’t have any fondness for Ares, and I honestly can ’t blame you, given what he did to you and Eli especially.  But I have to tell you – it ’s a wonder he didn ’t lose his shit long before.  I think more than the rest of us, his gig was the stuff nightmares are made of.”

“And yet he reveled in all of it.”

Cupid shrugged.  ”Maybe it was a coping mechanism.  I dunno.  All I know was that being a soldier and going to war that first time....”  He shook his head.

“Did it get easier?”

“In some ways, yes.  It had to.  It ’s how the mind learns to cope with ugliness it should never be forced to endure.  In other ways, no.  Things stay with you, and you want to remember because it keeps you human.”

Arianna nodded her head slowly.  “Okay, so how does this relate to you becoming Elijah?”

Cupid chuckled.  “My, my... you are an impatient little thing aren ’t you?” holding up a hand to forestall her interruption.  “I ’m getting there, I promise.”

“Get there a little faster, please.  I know this may seem like some big cosmic joke to you, but....”

“No,” he replied solemnly, “I never thought of any of this as a joke.  And I want to be able to make this better for you... for Eli, and I think knowing everything will help.”

Arianna pinched her lips together briefly before nodding her agreement.

“Thank you,” he continued.   “For a while, I had to move around regularly – whether I faked my death or a family emergency or simply disappeared.  I would create a new identity.  Fortunately, having been a god and an immortal, I was well-versed in a number of career options.”  He smiled.  “I ’ve been an educator; a police officer; a veterinarian; a home builder; a banker; a custodian; a student; and a Navy man among other things.  It ’s been a long and varied lifetime, and for much of that time, I was stuck on my home world.  So I would move around from place to place – some of them new... some of them old and familiar.  And it was okay, you know?  Because I was still living... still meeting new people, and if the experiences weren ’t exactly new, at least they were fresh.

And I didn ’t always start out as an adult.  Sometimes....”  He sighed.  “One of the few great things of returning home – however accidentally – was that I still had power.  I mean, there was still love in the world, and I just had to tap into it.  And that enabled me to be what I wanted to be.  Sometimes, I started a new life as an adult; others I was a kid.  But once – only once – I wanted to start from the beginning... as a baby.”  He waited when he saw her tilt her head thoughtfully as she considered his words.

“Can I ask how?”

Cupid smiled.  “Of course.  Even without the ‘Eli factor ’ that is spurring your curiosity, you ’re still a scientist.  Asking questions is what makes you so good at what you do.”

Arianna waited another moment, and when he didn ’t continue, she crossed her arms over her chest and raised an eyebrow.  “All right – so how?”

“Let me back up a little. When humanity finally reached the stars, I realized I might be able to finally find my family... be able to bring them home.  So when I had the first opportunity to go into space, I took it.  I never knew... it was like the first time I was a soldier.  So much horror and carnage.”  He turned and met Arianna ’s gaze.  “I actually served with Edward Wellesley.”

She couldn ’t stop her shocked gasp.  “Mama Mary ’s Edward?”

“The same.  He was an amazing man, and I was proud to be called his friend.  I was his top when he first met Mary.” Cupid smiled.  “Eddie was so gone on her it was almost funny. I was so glad when they finally got together - they were made for each other… a lot like you and Eli. ”  He turned thoughtful.  “I think he would be proud of his kids, and of Mary – and sad that she remains alone.  More than anything, he wanted her to be happy, and I don ’t think she has been since he died.”

Brown eyes sharpened.  “How do you know that??  How can you possibly...?”  She held up a hand.  “Oh, I  believe you knew him once upon a time.  Your eyes say as much.  But how could you know about Mary now, unless....”  She covered her eyes with her hand and released a slow, deep breath.  “Who are you... or who were you to her??  Please tell me you aren ’t... you weren ’t one of her kids.  God, that would kill her.”

Cupid sighed.  “I wasn ’t born one of her children, no.  Look, we ’re getting a little off subject here.  Let me finish telling you about Eli.  Then we can worry about the rest later... or not at all.”

“Oh, no… no no no.  You’re going to explain all of it.  Right. Now.”

He sighed again.  He should have known, really.  His life had started to unravel a long time ago - from the moment he’d met and made friends with Edward Wellesley, in fact.  And he’d had every hand in writing his own imminent destruction as far as these kids were concerned - because he’d been the one to choose his destinies and the lives he’d lived.

“All right,” he finally agreed.  “But you have to let me tell it my way.  I promise it will make more sense, and I’ll tell you everything.  Maybe you can help me find a way to break it to the rest so no one completely freaks out.  I’m pretty sure there are gonna be a couple freak outs.  I think Mom might even freak out….”  He sucked in a breath and nearly choked on the air when Arianna grabbed his hands and squeezed firmly.

“You need to take a breath,” she instructed, waiting for him to do so.  “Good,” she nodded when he obeyed.  “Now another… and again,” finally feeling him start to relax.  “Are you done freaking out?” Hoping she was using his words correctly, and smiling when he nodded.  “All right.  I want you to start from the beginning from when you met Edward Wellesley.  You do it in whatever order you think will be the most linear, but don’t leave anything out.  I want to hear about Edward, and how you know about Mary and how you became Elijah.  Then we’ll see if there is any way we can make this better for Eli and the rest to hear.”

“All right.”  He clasped her hands gently once more before releasing them.  Then he leaned back into the console and took a deep breath, ready to begin his tale.

Chapter LVI

“When I met Edward Wellesley, he was a brash, outgoing young man, and I was an old soldier by that point.  I had lived through a hundred lifetimes, or at least it felt like it, and his joy and enthusiasm for life was renewing. So I might have favored him a little more than I should have as his top, but his friendship was a balm to my tired spirit.”

“Okay,” Arianna interrupted.  “You mentioned that word ‘top’ twice now.  What is that?  What does it mean?”

Cupid smiled.  “Sorry.  I forgot you’re not really familiar with military terms… especially from my home planet.  A top is a first sergeant that runs a platoon and babysits his lieutenant through his growing pains on his way to becoming a qualified officer.”

Arianna snickered.  “So you were babysitting Edward?  And he knew this?”

“More or less… to both.  A good officer learns pretty quickly to trust his NCOs to teach him and have his back.  And Eddie was one of the best I ever served with.  He was fierce and loyal, and despite the experiences he had in black ops that tempered his outlook, he never completely lost his joy or enthusiasm for life.  Mary had a lot to do with that, I think.”

“Why?” Rolling her eyes at his confusion.  “Why do you think that?”

“You need to understand - black ops are operations that no one talks about because of how heinous they are in nature.  Threats are quietly eliminated; people that need to be expunged are erased.  They are things that can eat at the soul of a man until he has nothing left, and soulless men are the worst kind of threat.  But when he found Mary, he found purpose and a sense of… I dunno strength and support.  Oh not at first - not when she was stringing him along, playing games with him.  But honestly, I think that just made him more determined than ever to win her heart, and his sense of victory when she finally capitulated was….”  He chuckled.  “Let’s just say we were all pretty stoked… happy… for him.”

“Did you attend their wedding?”

Cupid smiled and nodded.  “I did.  And I stayed by his side for another few months before I ‘retired’.  Then I faked my death and moved on around the galaxy for a bit before finally landing on Eli’s planet.”

“So you didn’t actually choose to go there?”

“Not directly, no.  I was visiting around the planets of the new Alliance - it was the first real space travel I'd done… military service not withstanding.  So I took my time and looked around, learning all I could about these new cultures.  I couldn’t believe how similar and yet how different they were.”

“And it didn’t occur to you to wonder why?  To think they might all be related somehow??”

“Not really.  We - the other gods and I - never thought we were alone in the universe, and it was exciting to find out we were right.  I never imagined all of you could be traced back to us.”

“Live and learn, I guess, “ Arianna muttered.  “So how did you become Elijah?”

Cupid huffed.  “I’m getting to that.  So when I got to Eli’s planet, I was able to blend in, for the most part.  Remember, by that point, I had been a warrior for the better part of my existence in some capacity or other… even moreso than my gig as the love god.  But I was also qualified in so many different fields, one of which was medicine.  And I knew when I saw Eve that there was something wrong.”

“How??  How did you know??”

Cupid smiled gently.  “Arianna, despite everything, I was still a god, and Eli's society values love greatly.  It was a huge boost for me, and I was almost at the strength I had been in my heydays in Greece.  I could see….”  He sighed.  “Every being has an aura, and at the time, I could see them.  Again… real boost in my powers.  Anyway, I knew when I looked at Eve that something was wrong.  Her aura was unhealthy.  It was only when I looked deeper that I understood why.  She was pregnant with twins - one of which was healthy and thriving; the other of which was struggling.  So I talked to him.”

“Excuse me??”

Cupid sighed.  “I had the opportunity to exam Eve as an apprentice to the Shamaness that was caring for her.”

“Wait - they let you, a *male*, examine a female Shaman that wasn’t your wife??”

“Um… no.  I was female at the time.  God, remember?  Changing my appearance wasn’t terribly difficult, and I knew that it was a matriarchal society, so I became a young woman.”

Arianna snorted.  “Must be nice,” waving him off before he could either ask or comment.  “So you examined Eve?”

“Yes.  She was… concerned.  She could feel something wasn’t right.  Her mother, Elenora - the Shamaness that was caring for Eve - had allowed me to study with her, even though I wasn’t of her line… probably because I showed some aptitude toward the healing arts,” rolling his eyes.  “And also because Eve was having such a difficult pregnancy that she was unable to continue her duties as a Shaman and Headwoman.”

“I’m getting confused.”

“Suffice it to say that Elenora - who had once been the Shamaness and Headwoman of the Clan, and  who had retired from service when Eve was ready to assume the position - had to resume her role as such while Eve was pregnant with Elijah and Elizabeth.  She stepped down again once Eve’s health returned.”

“After their birth?”

“After their birth.”

“So how did you talk to him while he was… you know… still inside her?”

“When I arrived on their planet as a visitor the first time, I was a warrior… a soldier… and a man.  When I realized how their society operated, I left, then returned as a woman… as someone from Abigail’s planet.”

“That allowed you to act as an empath.”

“Correct.  And it gave me the opportunity to ask for an apprenticeship.”

“You asked?”

“I did.  I had to ask for permission to spend an extended amount of time on the planet, and I was told I had to be a productive member of their society for that to be a possibility.  After talking to Elenora, she decided to allow me to stay and become an apprentice while her daughter was put on bed rest.” He sighed.  “She asked me if I could sense anything from the fetus - if I could figure out why Eve was doing so poorly.  It was….”  He shook his head.  “Elijah was dying.  He wasn’t strong enough to survive, so I asked if he would be willing to allow me a chance to help him.  I would heal him, and he would let me be part of him.”

“And Elenora knew this??”

“What?!  Oh no - no, she didn’t know anything about it.  I faked my death - again - allowed my female body to become weak while I talked to Elijah.  I let her think I gave my life to ensure the healthy development of the life growing in Eve.”

“You really are a piece of work,” Arianna grumbled.

“Hey!  If I hadn’t, Elijah would have died, and there is every likelihood he would have taken Ellie with him.  However accidentally, I did you a favor!”

Arianna’s face whitened at the implication.  “I’m… I’m sorry.  Did you know - then - how important they were?  How important Eli was?”

“Not even vaguely.  I just wanted to help, and being given the opportunity to be born….  I never really had that, you know?  And it was… fantastic.  Ellie and I became best friends in the womb.  She’s amazing, you know?”

Arianna gave him a droll look.  “Yes.  I might have noticed that once or twice.”

Cupid blushed.  “Right… right. So basically, Elijah and I shared the same body.  I kept him strong, and I was allowed to feel and be and do a part of everything he did because we were basically one person - my strength and his… everything else.  It was incredible.  So, in essence, we grew up; we fell in love; we became a husband and father; and then he became a hero in his own right by standing beside his warrior wife and protecting her as he would have his sister.  He earned that right - and everything else that he had - on his own.  I didn’t do anything that he couldn’t do for himself.”

“And he was happy?”

“Happy and fulfilled.  He had a much longer life than he ever expected, and it was good to him.”

“So why did you let him die?”

Cupid looked sharply at her before realizing that it wasn’t an accusation, but merely a question she was trying to understand.  “I didn’t.  His actions - his bravery - caused his death, and only godly interference could have changed that.  He didn’t want that.  And it wasn’t my place to force that choice.”

“But surely he had to know.”

“… what that would do to Eli?  To Sarah and his children?”  Cupid nodded at Arianna’s acknowledgement.  “He did… in the most distant way he could fathom that kind of loss.  But he also knew that it was his time.  He’d already beaten death once - had more of a life than he ever expected.  And he knew if I saved his life - if he didn’t die by the mortal wounds that had been inflicted on his person, he would become… if not an outcast, at least looked upon with fear and morbid curiosity.  And he didn’t want that for himself or for his family… especially Eli.  It would have killed her chances with the program.  She would have been marked as an anomaly to be dissected and studied.”

“That’s horrible!”

“It’s also true.  Some things in human nature are frighteningly consistent.  Morbid curiosity is right there at the top of that list.  And more than anything, Elijah had no desire to inflict that sort of scrutiny onto his sister.”  He paused.  “He idolized her, ya know.”

“I think the same could be said for her.”

Cupid nodded.  “It could.  I think he made the right decision for all concerned.  He lived long enough to find love and happiness; to have children; and to bring honor to his house.  That’s more than a lot could say.”

“I guess.  I hope Eli will understand that when the time comes to explain it to her.  All she sees is that she failed to save her brother, and that guilt eats at her every single day.”

“I’ll make her understand.”

“I hope you can,” Arianna said with a sigh.  “So that brings us back to Mary.”  She laughed a little at his long suffering expression.  “Please… you didn’t really think I’d forget now, did you?”

He sighed.  “Not really, but it never hurts to hope.”

She snorted.  “As long as you don’t actually expect hope to make me forget something important like that.”  She sobered after a moment.  “Tell me what happened.”

Cupid hung his head a minute and studied the floor.  “To be perfectly honest, I had forgotten about Eddie and Mary while I was out living among the stars and planets of the Alliance.  It’s not that I didn’t care, but I had already lost so much… so many friends and lovers… over the years, that when I moved on to a new life and new situation, I tended to… I dunno how to - I tended to compartmentalize my memories and experiences.  I never lost them, per se, but they were no longer part of my active thoughts.”

Arianna nodded her understanding.  “So what brought them back to your attention?”

“Eddie’s death. When he died trying to rescue all those people, it made news across the galaxy.  I was actually on your friend Luke’s planet at the time when I heard the report, and even there - on a planet that punishes fighting by death - even there, they took the time to honor his sacrifice.”

“So you wanted to go home to… what?  Check on them?”

“Something like that, yeah.  Or at least check on Mary.  Remember, none of the kids had been born when I left the first time.  I felt like I owed him.”

“Why?”

“A lot of reasons, but mostly because he reminded me of the best parts of humanity… reminded me why I had not been unhappy being as human as I could be for so long.  He tried to save my life once, but even that debt paled in comparison to the friendship he gave without a second thought.”

“How do you try to save someone’s life?  Seems like either you do or you don’t.  It’s not really something you can do halfway.”

Cupid offered her a crooked grin.  “I didn’t really need saving.  It was a bar fight that got out of hand.  Yet he stood beside me without a second thought - even though I was in the wrong - because he was my friend.  So I decided I could repay that debt by at least making sure Mary was okay.”

“So who were you?” Arianna asked, narrowing her eyes at him.  “You said you weren’t one of her kids.  Were you close to her?”

Cupid nodded and released a deep breath.  “I was… I was Joseph.”

Dark brows rose into an equally dark hairline.  “Joseph?  Nathaniel’s Joseph?”

“The same.  I knew my best chance to be close to her was to become part of the security team she and Eddie had created to protect Joy.”  He chuckled at her countenance, easily recognizing her confusion and disbelief.  “I did my research on my way back.  I learned as much as I could before I got there.”  He shook his head, and grinned sadly.  “I just didn’t count on Nathaniel.  He kind of swooped in and blew my socks off.”

“Did you love him?”

“I did, as much as I could - as much as I loved any of the men and women who passed through my life as lovers and partners.  He’s a good man.”

“He is.  Does he know…?”

“About Cupid?  No, and he can’t.  Joseph died an honorable death on the Storm Surge, protecting the kids of the Alpha Team.  Cupid is going home to the wife and family I’ve missed for millennia.”

“And Nathaniel?”

“Nathaniel will grieve and mourn the loss of his husband, but eventually he’ll be all right. He’ll find someone else to love when he’s ready to love again.  And he has a family that will surround him with love and caring until then.”

“And even after.”

“Exactly.”

“Do you feel like your debt to Edward was paid… by the time you spent with Mama and her family?”

“Sometimes, yes.  I did what I could to add happiness to her life, but I’m not sure she’ll ever be truly happy without Eddie.  Even if she gives Caleb the chance he’s been waiting a lifetime for.”

“Do you think she will… give Caleb a chance, I mean?”

“I dunno.  I hope so.  She deserves to be happy again - they both do.  And in the meantime, I need to do what I can to help Eli.  I never meant….  You have to understand - I didn’t recognize her as Joseph.  It wasn’t until I heard everyone calling her Eli that I even considered the possibility she was the same sister I’d grown up with as Elijah.  And it wasn’t until I touched her as Cupid that I knew for certain.”

“How?”

“Because Elijah saw her as his sister and best friend - brothers can be notoriously obtuse when it comes to recognizing how beautiful their female siblings really are.  For me, it was like they were two completely different individuals - the goofy, geeky sister, and the gorgeous, brilliant scientist.”

“Hey!  That’s my querida… my wife… you’re talking about!” she exclaimed with jealousy shining out of sparking brown eyes.

“I know,” he answered calmly.  “But am I wrong?”

She sucked in a deep breath and shook her head.  “No. No, you’re not wrong; I’m just not used to others appreciating her aesthetics quite so clinically.  There are a lot of humans who would kill to be in my feet.”

“Your shoes,” Cupid corrected with a smile.  “They would kill to be in your shoes.”

Arianna shook her head.  “Standard language is going to make me crazy,” she complained.  “I am never going to get all these axioms and idioms correct.”

Cupid patted her on the shoulder.  “If it makes you feel better, it took me several lifetimes to get the hang of them, and every time I thought I had it down, everything would change.”

“Somehow, that is not very comforting,” she grumbled.

It was quiet for a few minutes after that, and Arianna turned her attention back to the fuission reactor.  Cupid went back to checking and rechecking the ships’ systems.  “Everything looks good here.  We should be able to increase speed at your command without causing further damage to any of the primary or secondary systems.”

“Let’s move it up slowly through the warp speeds, then we’ll bring the transwarp engine on line.  No offense, but the sooner we get you and Aphrodite home, the sooner we can get to our new home.  And I am more than ready to be done with this part of the journey and onto the actual building of our new society.”

“None taken,” Cupid assured her.  “Pretty sure I’d feel the same way in your shoes.  I just hope I can fix things for Eli before we get home.  I need her to understand….”

“We’ll make sure she knows,” Arianna assured him.  “I’ll make sure she knows.  It will bring her back to me, and that’s reason enough to ensure she understands… well, everything.”

“Do you think she’ll forgive us?  Will she forgive me?”

“You’ll have to ask her, but I think so… if only for her own peace of mind.”

Cupid studied her for a moment before nodding his acceptance of her words.  Then they turned back to their work, and slowly started pushing the engines to perform their magic.  And the rest slept and dreamed, hoping for brighter days ahead.

Chapter LVII

Grayson crossed the threshold into engineering with only the barest hint of trepidation.  In fairness, given the way her week had gone, it wasn’t an entirely unwarranted action.  Still, she strode through confidently as though nothing could keep her off her stride… only to halt a moment later when she reached Zach, standing in front of the warp core.

“Um… Zach?” Asked after a full minute of stunned silence.

“I’m not sure either, Cap,” answering a myriad of questions with his single response.  “We don’t know where it came from or how it got here or what to do with it,” motioning to the obvious force field around the core itself.  “What we do know - just from scanning the structure - is that it probably saved us from annihilation.  We would have blown to smithereens otherwise.”

Grayson studied it for a moment, and Zach watched in fascination, almost able to see the gears turning.  He did, in fact, see the exact second she came to a realization.  “May I see your scans?” extending her hand for his unit.  After a long moment, she looked up and met his eyes.  “Get Mitchell and Renard down here.  This looks like the Nebula.”

“Excuse me?  I mean, yes ma’am,” signaling his second to call for the scientists in question.  Grayson took pity on his curiosity, and let the slight breach of protocol lapse.

“Look at the pattern, Zach.  It looks remarkably similar to the Nebula when it started moving.  If it was sentient enough to physically move itself to protect those kids from the Storm Surge, why would it not be able to keep us from exploding?”

“But why would it care?  About us I mean?”

Grayson smiled.  “We might have benefitted collaterally.  After all, if we’d gone BOOM, there is every likelihood that we would have destroyed whatever the Nebula was trying to put into place.”

Zach cocked his head.  “Huh.  That makes a certain amount of sense, I guess.”

Grayson smirked.  “I do try.”

“Oops!  Sorry, Cap!”

“No worries, Zach.  Bring these guys up to speed,” gesturing to the scientists that had just entered engineering, “and let me know as soon as you figure out how to dismantle that field.  We may not be as long getting back to check on those kids as I feared.”

“You got it, Cap!” offering her a snappy salute before crossing engineering to grab the two scientists and lead them to the core while explaining the Captain’s theory.  Grayson watched them a minute longer, then nodded her head in satisfaction.  If anyone could figure this puzzle out swiftly, she was confident her team could.  Now, she needed to go check back in with Matt and Hank.  Between them, she knew they could find a solution.

It was shaping up to be a pretty good day after all.

************

“Mama?”  The knock on the door was light and Nathaniel stuck his head in as he quietly stepped into the darkened room.  “Mama?”

Mary blinked her eyes open slowly and beckoned him forward with a slight hand gesture.  “Come in, my son,” she said softly.  “What troubles you?”

Nathaniel swallowed hard and crept forward on silent feet.  He knew he really shouldn’t be in here.  It had been a long, hard few days.  The day after the audio discovery of both Outreach and Storm Surge, Mary had collapsed - her leg had literally given way beneath her as it refused to hold her weight.  Eve had jumped in immediately, issuing orders and directives with the precision of a military general.  She’d had Mary moved to the lab space - the brightest and cleanest room in the house - and had set up a makeshift operating theatre. 

For hours, she - along with Tom and Giselle, a fellow healer and parent to a member of the Gamma team - had gone over every single inch of Mary’s body, finding pockets of pus and poison and methodically destroying them one by one.  There were only a few found sporadically beyond the initial wound, mostly in the leg, but the wound area itself….  It had been a wonder Eve and her medical team had managed to salvage the leg at all, given what they had found there - cluster upon cluster of foul smelling, pus filled pockets. 

When they were sure they had eliminated every single last one of them, they checked twice more.  Then they hooked Mary to a machine that would cycle the blood in her body through a complicated filter system, gradually removing the poison, which now made up almost sixty percent of her fluid, and replacing it with both synthetic blood and donated blood.  That had taken nearly three days, to ensure the new blood was completely clean and wouldn’t shock her system with the sudden change.

Mary had been asleep since then, resting and recovering and totally undisturbed by Eve’s directive and authority.  But news had finally come through and been confirmed, and Nathaniel knew that not only did his Mama have the right to know, she would be the only one to come close to understanding.

So he chanced a moment when Eve was at lunch, and Caleb - who had been a constant presence since her collapse - was not around, called away by his duty in fulfilling Mary’s role as Chief.

“How’re you feeling, Mama?  You look a little….”  He trailed off, not sure how to finish his sentence without insulting her.  Mary chuckled lightly, then grimaced as pain bolted through her at the movement.

“Like I’ve been hit head on by a cargo ship?” She offered with a smile, extending her hand slightly.

“I wouldn’t say….”

“You don’t have to.  I did,” squeezing lightly when he took her hand.  “I’m exceedingly tired… like I ran to the moon and back in hip deep mud.”  He winced in sympathy.  “I’m told it’s normal after what they did to me.”  She made a face.  “Not sure why I suddenly needed to start being normal now,” eliciting a surprised laugh from her younger son.

“Change of pace, maybe.”

“Hmm,” she snorted.  “No pace at all, apparently,” she griped.  “You know how I feel about being cooped up and inactive.  And no one wants to tell me what’s going on.  I’m about ready to get out of this bed and go….”

Nathaniel eased her back into a more reclined position.  “Mama, despite everything you taught us to believe growing up, you are still human, and you do need some time to recover from what was a serious, major trauma.  Besides, I’m here to let you know at least some of what is going on.”  He swallowed hard again, and tears glistened in his eyes.

Mary clasped his hands more firmly and struggled to sit up again before giving up and leaning back against her pillows.  “What’s happened, Nathaniel?  Tell me.”

He sucked in a deep breath and swallowed a third time, so loudly Mary knew his throat must be swollen against the tears she could see sitting on the edges of his eyelashes.  He blinked and one fell, rolling down his face until he swiped at it angrily.  “Um… we’ve discovered a lot in the last couple days. The black ops ships have all reported back in.  They all sustained a bit of structural damage from being flung halfway across the galaxy, but the critical and most of the secondary functions seem to be fine.  They are all headed back to where the Nebula was.”

“Was?”

“Was.  From what we’ve been able to determine, it’s gone… like no longer there.  At all.  In its place, there appears to be a new solar system.  It’s hard to be certain without sending a science ship in, but….”

“Wait - if we don’t even have science ship there, how did we come to this conclusion?”

Nathaniel took a shuddering breath.  “Because Joseph was on the Storm Surge, and the Storm Surge was there.  It wasn’t supposed to be, but it was,” he reminded her gently.  “And he had everything recording and sending back to us.  We only just started getting his signal yesterday.”

“Yesterday??  And you’re just now coming to me with this??”  She started to pull away from him, but Nathaniel simply held on tighter.  She glared, but he glared back until she finally sighed in defeat, seeing something in his eyes that compelled her to surrender this particular fight.  “I’m sorry,” she reply quietly.  “I understand why - it just….”

“Frustrates the hell out of you; I know.  Technically, I shouldn’t be in here telling you any of this yet.  If Eve or Caleb find me or figure out I was here….”  He gave her a lopsided smile.

“So why risk it, Natty?” calling him by his childhood name.  “What was so important you felt compelled to go against everyone to see me?  What did Joseph send back?”

His bottom lip quivered, and he sucked in a tremulous breath.  “He…. Apparently, he knew something was going on… was wrong.  He recorded a message for me and dropped a buoy with that message and a recorder to broadcast what happened.  I think he knew….”  Nathaniel covered his eyes with one hand and Mary covered their clasp with her suddenly free hand, instinctually knowing exactly where this was going.

When it was apparent that Nathaniel was trying to pull himself together, Mary spoke softly.  “He told you goodbye?” waiting for him to nod.  When he complied, she urged him into her embrace and that was all it took for Nathaniel to break down into sobs.  She held on and let him cry for several long minutes, whispering nonsense in his ear until his sobs calmed to something more akin to breathing. “I am so sorry, my son.  I would never have had this happen to you for all the world,” she whispered when he was merely crying.  “If I could take his place….”

Nathaniel shook his head, wiping the tears fiercely from his face.  “No, Mama.  Joey would never have allowed that, even if it was possible, and to be honest, neither would I.  At least I got to hear from him once more; he told me he loved me… loved the family; thanked me for the time we had together. And like you, I know he went out like he would have chosen - doing what he loved, and protecting those who couldn’t stand against….”  He frowned and sat up enough to look into Mary’s eyes.  “He didn’t say what he was protecting the Alpha Team against, but he indicated that whatever the danger was, it was on the Storm Surge.  That was one reason….”  He hiccoughed in an effort to stifle the sobs that wanted to erupt again.

“One reason what, Natty?”

“Maaaamaaaaa,” he whined at the repeat of the nickname he had been happy to leave in the past.  “You know how much I hate being called that.”

Mary smirked.  “Yes, but it made you think of something else for a moment.”

He smiled sadly.  “It did.  I never let Joey call me that.  I made him sleep on the couch for a week the only time he tried after Ian introduced him to it.”

This time, Mary snorted.  “I’m sure that went over spectacularly.”

Nathaniel shrugged.  “He never tried it again, anyway.”

They were silent for another moment, before Mary spoke again.  “So I’m guessing this buoy broadcast something of importance?”

”Gideon is still trying to clean it up enough for you to get a clearer picture, but basically, the Nebula appears to have wrapped up the Storm Surge just before it exploded.  When the screen cleared, relatively speaking, the Nebula and the Storm Surge are just… missing.  They’re not there.  All that’s left is a new star and some planets orbiting around it, but not the same ones as before… or at least not in the same pattern they were in.  I dunno - it’s all a little weird if you ask me.”

“Where’s the Outreach?”

“No idea.  The speculation at the moment is that they made it out just ahead of the explosion - there was a singular bright flash just at the edge of the visual before everything went glaringly white.  Gideon and his team are hoping when they remove the interference, we’ll be able to get a better looks at exactly what happened.”

Mary nodded.  “Do the parents know?”

Nathaniel shook his head.  “No.  A lot of it is speculation and guesswork on our parts based on what we know and what we’ve learned to dissimulate in situations like this.”

“Not that this is like anything we’ve ever dealt with before.”

Nathaniel smirked.  “Yeah, there is that.  But the few of us that have seen the broadcast have pretty much come to the same gut conclusion - that the Outreach managed to get away just before the Nebula and the Storm Surge exploded and created an entirely new solar system.”

“Are there signs of life?  On any of those planets in that new solar system - have we found any signs of life?”

Nathaniel frowned.  “I don’t think anyone has tried looking.  Why?”

“Because there were signs of life on the planets that were there before - at least we’re pretty sure there were.  We were getting some flaky readings from that area.”

“I’ll have Gideon check.  Normally, I’d say everything was destroyed and reborn with the Nebula’s explosion, but since it showed signs of sentience, there is every possibility it could have shielded whatever lifeforms existed there.”  Mary nodded, and winced when she tried to shift.  Nathaniel scooted closer and brushed some hair out of Mary’s face.  “Is there something I can do for you, Mama?  Any way for me to help make things a little better?”

Mary smiled sadly and leaned into his touch, closing her eyes and breathing in the clean scent of him that reminded her just a little of his father.  “No, my son.  You’ve done far more than I could have hoped for - considering your own loss and the way Eve and Caleb have hawked over me since….”

“They’re just looking out for your best interests.”

“I know,” Mary grumbled.  “That’s why it’s hard to be angry with them.  It’s still vexing, however.”

Nathaniel smirked.  “Just remember your best interests are also theirs, so it’s a little selfish on their parts as well.  And frankly, I’m thrilled they are both that selfish.  We want you around for a good long time, and they may have ensured that.  Well, that and your sheer cussedness.”  He paused a moment before smirking.  “Dad would have been proud, you know.”

Mary snorted.  “Who do you think taught me??” She sighed. “I’m always going to walk a little funny now.”

“No worse than you did when Ian broke your kneecap,” making both of them wince at the memory.  “And besides, we’ll take you limping and hobbling all day long if it means we get to keep you around a little longer.”

“Oh, she’s gonna be around a lot longer than a little while,” Caleb growled from the door where both he and Eve stood glaring at the two of them with arms crossed over their chests.  “Would you like to explain why you’re here despite….”

“Caleb!” Mary cut in before he could say something he would regret.  She shook her head slightly before turning her attention back to Nathaniel.  “Are you going to set up a memorial service?”

Nathaniel shrugged, eyes watering again.  “I don’t… I haven’t really given it much thought yet.”

Mary cupped his cheek in her hand.  “You think about it.  It’s entirely up to you, of course, though I think it would be a lovely gesture - and would give everyone, including you, some closure.  That being said, if you need my help, or just want to talk….”

“Thank you, Mama.  I knew you, of all people, would understand.”

“I do.  And I’m sorry that you understand as well now.  Not something I would have ever wished for.”

He leaned forward and kissed her forehead, rising as he patted the hand that still held his.  “I’ll keep you posted.  You get some rest.”

Mary rolled her eyes.  “I don’t think I’m going to have a lot of choice in the matter,” mock-glaring at her caretakers, “though truth be told, I’m actually feeling somewhat better… all things considered.  With luck,” glancing at Eve and Caleb, “I might be able to see daylight soon - you know, with my own eyes and not out of a window.”

“How about you let us help you to sit up for a while,” Eve suggested, “and if that goes well, we can move on to trying to make you gradually mobile?”  She moved over and clasped a hand around her wrist, while placing the other across her forehead as Nathaniel backed away to stand next to Caleb.  “I know you think this is taking an obscenely long amount of time, but truthfully, Mary, you’re doing so much better than we dared to hope for at this stage of your recovery… especially once we got in and saw exactly the damage that had been done.”  She met Mary’s eyes squarely.  “I’m convinced your stubbornness and determination are a large part of the reason you’re doing as well as you are.”

“That and the quality of care I’ve received.  Despite all my grumbling, I really am entirely grateful to the lot of you for looking out for me.  It could have been worse.”

Eve motioned the two men out the door and waited for them to exit before taking a seat on the bed beside Mary.  “You should have died, Mary.  You were absolutely correct - it was killing you. You should have already been dead from what we found.  I wasn’t kidding about how exceptional your recovery has been, because you never should have survived as long as you did.  I’m truly more than a little thankful to the Alpha Team for being such a magnificent… what was the description my дочь used? Cracker?  Cricket?  Clucker?”  She hesitated, scanning through the myriad of terms her daughter had used when they’d talked about the many things that had driven Eli crazy during the selection process.  Finally…  “CLUSTER!!  That’s it!  For being such an epic cluster - her exact words, I believe,” causing Mary to chuckle and smiling in sympathy.  “I’m convinced their misadventures were the cosmos’ way of keeping you alive.  You were too busy focusing on them to notice much of anything else, including how poorly you were really doing.”

Mary kept her attention on Eve, who shifted her hands to hold one of Mary’s in both of hers as she sighed.  “That being said, and despite the fact that Caleb would wrap you up in a fur bundle to protect you if he thought he could get away with it, I’m going to give you the authorization to resume a little more of your duties.”  She held up a hand before Mary could draw breath.  “You still won’t be allowed to be up and about… even once we get you a little mobile… and your activities will have to remain closely monitored by a member of the medical staff to ensure your continued progress towards good health.  But at this point, I’m firmly convinced that keeping your mind busy and active will only further the healing of your body.  However,” she held up a finger and glared at Mary sternly, “I expect you to be forthcoming with any issues you might run into… even things that seem of little or no importance.  We want you well.”

Mary clasped the finger that was still raised.  “I want me well too,” she confessed.  “I am sick and tired of feeling sick and tired.  I want to enjoy living again.”

Eve stared at her a moment longer, and read the sincerity in her eyes.  She nodded her acceptance.  “Very well.  Give me your hands,” extending her free one, “and we’ll see about letting you sit up for a while.  But you let me know when that leg starts hurting.”

“Pretty sure you’ll know before I will, Doc,” as she allowed herself to be pulled into a sitting position for the first time in days.  Her leg ached, but not with the intensity it had before and she nodded in satisfaction.  “For now, it’s nice just to be able to no longer be flat on my back.  I never realized how exhausting that could be.”

“No one does… until they have to live it.”

Chapter LVIII

Mary blew out an exhausted breath as she shifted her position in an effort to relieve the tension she could feel building in her back and hips while trying to keep pressure off her leg.  Eve turned from the window she had opened and gave her a reproving look. 

“What did we just talk about?”

“I was just trying to get a little more comfortable.”

“Mary… let us help you.  It’s not a weakness to ask for help, and there are going to be a lot of things you’re not going to be able to do by and for yourself at first… or for a while.”  She picked up a cloth from a stack that were being kept by the bedside to take care of the leakage where her leg was still draining.  It had been running clear for the last day or so, and she was hoping to close it up and apply the regen unit to it first thing tomorrow.  She gently wiped the sweat that had beaded up across Mary’s forehead and upper lip.  “Now tell me what hurts.”

“My back and hips are a little uncomfortable trying to accommodate the pain in my leg.  It’s better,” she hurried on.  “Don’t get me wrong - I can’t believe the difference I can feel, despite the pain I’m still having.”  She smiled wanly.  “I think the lessening of the pain there has allowed me to notice all the rest of the aches and owwies.”

Eve smiled softly and brushed a bit of hair out of Mary’s eyes.  “I’m certain of it.  The body is a little horrible like that.  Let me get Caleb and Nathaniel back in here and we’ll get you a little better situated.  Then I’ll make sure Caleb understands that it’s time to bring you up-to-date as much as possible, though I’m guessing that’s why Nathaniel was in here.”

“Don’t be angry at him, Doc.  This wasn’t just work.  This was something a boy needed his mama for - this was beyond….”  Mary stopped talking when Eve placed hand on her arm.

“It’s all right, Mary. I understand - as a MaTb as well as a healer.”  She stood to move away to the door, but hesitated when Mary put a hand out.  “Mary?”

“I just need to know - why now?” Shaking her head at Eve’s confused expression.  “You were so adamant about me relinquishing my work… about me stepping away from the responsibility of me being Chief.  So what changed?  Not that I’m not grateful - you know better than that,” chuckling at Eve’s sly smile.  “But why now?”

“When you were….  Before we did surgery, all I could see was how the stress and responsibilities you carried were exhausting you.  I felt they were a significantly contributing factor to your declining health.  Once we got inside….”  She shook her head.  “I wasn't kidding about what I said earlier - by all rights, you should have died. I’m confident in saying you kept yourself alive by not allowing your mind to focus on how bad things really were in your body. That being said, we’re going to be keeping a pretty close eye on you from now on to make certain there are no more flare-ups; no more pus pockets. There will be regular checkups and healer consultations. I think if we can catch them early enough in their development, we can destroy them without needing to open you up again.  I’m not sure how much more of that your body can tolerate.”

“I’d just as soon not find out,” flinching slightly.

“Me either.  So with that in mind, I believe allowing you to - if not resume your duties full time yet - take some steps back into your role as Chief, will do nothing but expedite your recovery.  And that’s good for all of us… including Caleb.”  Eve leaned forward in a pose of conspiracy.   “I don’t think he likes being Chief very much.”

Mary smiled and shook her head.  “I’m pretty sure you’re right.  He was never fond of being thrust into a leadership role he didn’t specifically pursue.  He served as Edward’s second, and stepped into that role for me when he retired from the service.  He prefers to ensure things get done by doing them himself instead of delegating the task to others.”

Eve snorted softly.  “I have one of those myself.  I do have to keep somewhat of a tight rein on him at times though; otherwise, he tends to get caught up doing too much on his own, and I love him too much to let him do that to himself.”

Mary blushed slightly, but refused to take the opening.  “I have several like that.  They’re part of the reason I make such a good Chief.  Some days it’s like being a mama to the lot of them.”

“But not a lover or a wife?” seeing the hesitation in both expression and body language and watching as Mary shifted uncomfortably again. “So, am I to to assume you’ve sorted out your feelings about Caleb then and you don’t love him?  Or are you just shy about expressing them?” Eve asked gently, though her expression was one of interested concern.

Mary sighed.  “Now really, Eve… when have I had an opportunity to consider much of anything since we talked?  I was in surgery the very next day, and I can honestly say I don’t have much of a memory of the last week aside from sleeping a lot, and having one healer or another checking on my leg the few times I was awake.  Not much time to consider anything,” she winced, “except to wonder how long it takes to grow roots from staying in one spot.”

Eve frowned.  “Are you still in pain?” noticing the discomfort Mary was unable to completely hide, though at least she didn’t seem to be sweating profusely any longer.

“I think I’m going to be for a while… or at least until the regen unit can do its job properly.  Maybe we should get Caleb back in here to get me caught up.  It should help keep my mind off of things for a little while.  Besides, I don’t want him riding herd on Nathaniel right now.”

Mary could see the questions in Eve’s eyes, but they remained both unspoken and unanswered.  Eve knew Mary would explain when she could, and until then, she trusted Mary to do what she deemed best for all concerned.  Instead,  Eve nodded and moved to the door, hoping to stave off the argument she was certain would be brewing between the two strong-willed men she’d sent out of the room.

************

Caleb and Nathaniel scooted out the door at Eve’s unspoken directive, eyes twinkling when they met at how well trained they’d been to follow instructions both verbal and silent.  There was more than a hint of sadness in Nathaniel’s countenance and Caleb felt his wrath cool under what he suspected was personal tragedy.  He had seen that exact expression on Mary’s face when she’d learned of Edward’s death, but for now, Caleb had nothing but his own speculation.

That made his ire pick up a little bit.  Here he was - supposedly in charge as the Chief’s trusted right hand - and obviously work was being carried on without his knowledge, and information was going around instead of through him.

“What the blazes of hell and damnation itself was that all about anyway??” turning fierce eyes in Nathaniel’s direction.  “What were you doing in there?? *I* am in charge right now - responsible for every bit of information coming in and out of that room by doctor’s orders.  How dare you go behind my back and put your mother in danger like that!  What right do you have…?”

“Joseph’s dead, Caleb!” Nathaniel hissed out as he turned his back on Caleb and the door to Mary’s room in an effort to keep his Mama from hearing them lash out at one another.  “Joseph’s dead,” he repeated in a whisper.  “And I knew Mama - not the Chief - would understand better than anyone else in the world.  I just needed….”  He covered his hand with his mouth, then sank into Caleb’s embrace when strong arms enfolded him from behind.  Caleb held on tightly as sobs once more wracked Nathaniel’s body, comforting as best he could in silence.  When the tears abated, Caleb finally spoke.

“Oh, my boy,” he whispered, hugging him tightly.  “I am so sorry.  I am so, so sorry.  Are you sure?”

“Yes.  He and all of the Storm Surge are gone… swept away by the Nebula as far as we can tell.  Gideon and his team are still working on cleaning up the visuals as well as the audio transmissions.”  He sucked in a deep breath and cleared his throat before loosening himself from Caleb’s hold.  “But nothing is going to change the fact that the ship exploded with the Nebula and that entire sector of space is entirely new.”

“New in what way?”

“A new solar system for one.”  He shrugged and shook his head.  “Honestly, that’s all we know.  Gideon and his team are working like crazy trying to clean things up so we know exactly what happened.  But it could take a while.  There’s a lot of static interference.  But it was clear the Storm Surge was right in the middle of the explosion.”

“And the Outreach?”

Nathaniel shook his head. “We couldn’t tell for sure, but it looked like they got away just before the Nebula went KABOOM.  There was a flash of… something… and they were not in the picture when it went all white.”

Caleb nodded and pinched his bottom lip as he considered Nathaniel’s words.  “All right.”  He sighed.  “I understand why you felt the need to go to Mary with this, son; I really do.  But please - if anything else happens… good or bad - please come to me first.  I wouldn’t have kept you from your Mama… not about something like this.  But I need to know….  I need to take care of….”

Nathaniel crossed back over to Caleb and placed a hand on his forearm.  “I know, and I’m sorry.  I didn’t think….  I thought Gideon would have already informed you, though I suppose I should have asked.  I know he wanted to have things cleaned up a little better so there weren’t so many questions about the Outreach.”  He squeezed the muscled arm beneath his touch lightly.  “We know how you feel about Mama.  We all do, and we approve.  We’re actually pulling for you to win her over.  She needs you as more than just her friend and confidante.  I don’t want you to feel like I was trying to leave you out of something, or because I don’t think of you as family - not even Ian and Joy know about this yet.  Only Gideon, me, Mama and now you.”

Caleb swallowed hard.  He’d been fairly certain Mary’s kids knew how he felt about their Mama, and that they didn’t disapprove of him at least.  But until now, their support of him as their mother’s suitor had never been stated so plainly.  “Thank you, Nathaniel.  That means… everything.  I’ve loved your Mama for a long time, and all I’ve ever wanted was to make her happy, but I knew Edward was always first in her heart, with you kids a close second.  I was never even in the picture.”

Nathaniel’s brows went into his hairline.  He’d never expected such a confession from Caleb… even if he, Joy and Ian had suspected he’d been in love with their mother for longer than Mary would believe.  He took a chance.  “How long?”

Caleb shrugged.  “Since the moment I met her.  But she was your Daddy’s, and he was my best friend.”

“So why haven’t you said anything?  I mean… I understand why not at first… even after Dad died - propriety and all.  But it’s been three years since we lost him.”

“Three years that not a day has gone by when she hasn’t thought of him… hasn’t missed him.  I wouldn’t….”  He shook his head again.  “She’ll let me know when she’s ready.”

Nathaniel moved his hand to Caleb’s bicep and squeezed again.  “Caleb, if there’s one lesson I’ve learned hard in the last day, it’s to not waste time.  You never know how much there is until there isn’t any anymore.  You make Mama happy, and obviously her particular brand of crazy hasn’t driven you away yet.  Go for it, and cherish the time you’ve been given.”

“I have to agree,” Eve said from the door as she closed it firmly shut behind her.  “I’m going to share something with the two of you that you are absolutely NOT permitted to share with anyone… not even your siblings,” with a glare at Nathaniel.  He held up his hand in surrender and nodded.  Eve released a deep breath.  “Mary should be dead.  She never should have made it to the operating table, much less have survived such a prolonged, invasive surgery.  So please don’t assume there is always tomorrow to worry about your feelings.  We’re not even promised today,” pinning Caleb in place with her glance.  “She knows you love her - my Noah said something about it to me privately after I scolded him for teasing you about it so publicly the other day.  And honestly, if he’s noticed, everyone has,” not mentioning how or why she was so sure of Mary’s feelings.  “I don’t know how long she’s known or how deeply she returns your feelings.  But if you love her as truly and deeply as I think you do, you need to step up and make your intentions known to her. Stop letting her dictate the pace, because I think she is more than a little terrified of how she feels and she’s comfortable where she’s at. She not going to voluntarily come out of her comfort zone even for a sure thing. That being said - it is time to start turning some of the Chief’s responsibilities back over to her.  Nothing too strenuous.  I don’t want her going out on missions and the like.  But she’s ready, and she needs to start taking over the reins again.  It got her through a situation that should have killed her, and I’m convinced letting her focus return to something other than her health will do her worlds of good.”

Caleb nodded his agreement, but before he could respond otherwise, Eve turned to Nathaniel.  “I am so very sorry for your loss, Nathaniel.  No, Mary didn’t share,” before he could ask, “but I am both a healer and a MaTb.  I suspected.  Overhearing the bit I did when I stepped out of the room simply confirmed my suspicions.  However, condolences aside - and I understand why you went to her for solace and counsel - please keep me and Caleb in the loop… at least for now.  Mary needs to begin resuming her role as Chief.  I just need her to do so at a pace that’s good for her recovery.  I can’t have her wanting to dash off hither, thither and yon to try and make things better.”

“I understand, Doc, and I’m sorry….”

“Don’t be. As I said, I understand and even agree with your reasons and motivations.  I would never have kept you away; I know what it’s like to lose a son in battle.  I’m just asking that you and the rest be mindful of her recovery.”

“Don’t worry, Doc.  That's right at the top of everyone’s minds.”  He paused and looked down before meeting Eve’s gaze.  “Would it be all right if I came up here to talk to her again later?  Not about… just to talk to her about Joey?  She’s one of the few people I know who lost a husband… a spouse… like this. I just need… I would like… I think she understands more than most would, just on virtue of that alone.  Even more because she’s, you know… Mama.”

“I think that might do you both good.  And maybe you could put in a word for Caleb,” she added with a hint of mischief.  Caleb flushed scarlet.

“Not if he knows what’s good for him,” Caleb chided gruffly.  “This is something I need to do on my own.”

“Just make sure you do it,” Nathaniel returned with a hint of asperity in his tone.  “There needs to be some good come out of all this cluster fuckery.”

Caleb snorted.  “You kiss your Mama with that mouth?” causing Eve to laugh aloud.  Nathaniel smirked.

“Why yes,” he replied with cheek.  “Though I usually brush my teeth after I say things like that so she doesn’t wash my mouth out with soap if she hears me.”  He looked around furtively, then back to the other two.  “I try to make sure she won’t hear me though.  Never was fond of the taste of soap,” sticking out his tongue and making a face.

Caleb rolled his eyes.  “Doc?  Can you go back in and sit with Mary for a while?  Tell her Nathaniel and I are going to see if we can get a little more information from Gideon.  I want to see this broadcast for myself so I can have some idea of what I’m talking about when I go in to debrief her.”

“As long as you’re not using me to avoid her.”

“No, ma’am.  I would never….” breaking off before his ire got the best of him.  Nathaniel stepped seamlessly into the breach.

“That’s really not his style, Doc.  He’s always stayed by her side, except when duty has called him away.  And this is duty, and for now, it has to come first.  Especially if you want Mama to start taking over her job again.  She's got to know everything that’s going on - the pertinent stuff anyway.  And trust me - this is pretty pertinent.  He needs to know everything he can before going in there to debrief her.”

Eve nodded.  “All right.  I’m sorry, Caleb.  I didn’t mean to insinuate….”

“You kind of did,” he corrected kindly, “but you were looking out for Mary’s best interests and I can’t fault you for that.  Let me go find out exactly what the teams know, and I’ll be back as soon as I can.”

“Fair enough.  Will one of you ask Aurora to join us on your way out?  She asked me earlier about speaking to Mary.  I think now would be as good a time as any.”

“You betcha, Doc,” Nathaniel answered with a smile, though it didn’t reach his eyes.  Eve returned his smile and gave a nod of thanks.  She could only imagine his heartbreak and understood all too well how long the road to recovery was going to be.

“Thank you, Nathaniel. We’ll keep Mary occupied while you boys take care of what you need to do.  And you can let Ian and Joy know that they are welcome to come visit if they’d like.”

This time Nathaniel’s smile was a little more genuine.  “Try to keep them away, Doc.  We’ve just been waiting for the word from you.”

“You have it, Mr. Wellesley.”

He groaned.  “I feel like a Middie again.”

Caleb chuckled at Eve’s expression.  “Get the Chief to explain it to you, Doc.  C’mon, son.  We’ve got work to do.”  Without another word, the two men left, and in only another moment, Aurora was scurrying to the door.

“You needed to see me, Eve?”

Eve shook her head.  “You asked about speaking to Mary.  I feel she’s ready to start seeing visitors, and since you’re family….” letting the thought trail off.

“As are you.” 

“Exactly.  I figure we can trade stories or such for a little while until her children come around to check on her. Who knows?  Maybe they’d like to share some stories too.”

“And what of your Noah?  Should he not be here as well?”

Eve checked her chronometer.  “He should be here in about fifteen standard.  He checks in with me every hour to make sure I am in need of nothing.”

“He seems like such a wonderful man.”

“He’s a handful,” Eve replied with a snicker, “but he’s all mine and I wouldn’t trade him for any amount of recompense.  Besides, like most OeTU’s from our world, he has a sixth sense for knowing when embarrassing stories are being shared.”

Aurora smirked.  “You know our mijas will never forgive us for sharing their secrets with the rest of the family.”

Eve shrugged.  “Should have thought about that before they made us all family.”

“In the meantime,” called an impatient voice from inside Mary’s room, “it would be nice if you would join me in here instead of hanging outside the door like conspiring children.”

They had the decency to look at one another and blush before laughter overtook them, and they opened the door and let themselves into Mary’s sanctuary, knowing there would be others that would join them soon.

Chapter LIX

Abigail was the first of the team to wake from her sleep… mostly because it had been less than restful for her.  She could feel the undercurrents of distrust and anxiety even through her shield and the added barrier sleep provided, so she knew something was more than a little off. She extended her senses slightly, finding little more than discomfort.  It frustrated her to be unable to sense anything beyond that, though she was also a little grateful - because it meant that whatever it was couldn’t be too serious, and her shields were still doing their job properly.  By the time she was fully awake and ready to begin her day, she could sense the stirrings of the others around her, and she knew beyond a shadow of a doubt something was wrong.  From the feel of it, one of their guests was unintentionally projecting, not being used to putting up barriers against an empath.

She walked to the mess hall, glad to see Hannah up and about again when she entered the room.  She signed to her and Hannah smiled gratefully, embracing Abigail in a hug before she responded by speaking.  “I’m doing much better.  My hearing has returned, though it’s not back up to full strength.  I’m kind of enjoying being a ‘normal’ humanoid in that regard for a moment, though I’ll also be glad to need the plugs again, just because it will mean everything is healed.”

“I hear you,” Abigail said.  “I can’t imagine….”

Hannah shook her head.  “It was weird and disorienting.  I’d rather hear every drip of water and heartbeat in the galaxy than to have that silence again.”

“I know what you mean.  It scared the crap out of me when I lost my senses.  I don’t understand how people live so isolated, but I’ve had many tell me they don’t understand how I can survive the sensory input I endure.”  She shrugged.  “I guess it’s just what you’re used to.”

“I think so.  It’s what’s normal for us; we don’t really know differently.”

“Yeah, I didn’t like differently for the little bit that it lasted,” grabbing her food and taking a seat next to Hannah.  “So why are you up?”

Hannah smiled.  “Aside from the fact that I was starving?” holding up her spoon.  “I’m not sure what woke me, honestly.  I was just awake, and I realized I was hungry, so here I came.”

“Yeah,” Deborah agreed from the doorway as she entered.  “Something is just… off.  It woke me up.”

“Me too,” Esther commented as she nudged Deborah into the mess hall.  “Move it, Deb. I’m hungry.”

“We all are,” Luke yawned and stretched as he pushed into the room.  “Has anyone talked to the Boss or Arianna this morning?”  He frowned.  “Is it morning?”

“Hard to say, honestly,” Danny replied.  “But for all intents and purposes, let’s go with ‘yes’ for now.  And I haven’t. I came straight here.”

“Me too.”
“So did I.”
“I haven’t.” 
“Not me.”

“And where’s Eden?”

“She was in the med bay when I left,” Hannah commented.  “She was sleeping at Jake’s bedside.”

“How is he?” Deborah asked, causing all heads to swivel around to look at Luke.  He swallowed his mouthful, even as he shrugged his shoulders slightly.

“He’s still in stasis and nothing had changed overnight from what I could see of the monitors and readouts in the office.  I didn’t want to wake Eden to do an in-depth examination until I could determine how long she’d been there,” turning his attention back to Hannah.

She shrugged.  “I was asleep pretty early last night, but she was there when I woke up this morning.”

“She came in last night before I headed out,” Kai volunteered.  “So I’m guessing whenever all of you headed to bed, she came to the infirmary.”

“All right,” Luke acknowledged.  “I’m gonna go talk to the Boss first… to see if she wants to check on Eden and Jake and Naomi.  Otherwise, I’ll be in sick bay.”

“Yeah, we’ve all got places to be and things we can take care of,” Deborah agreed.  “I’ve got a little more research to do for Eli.”

“And we’ll be in Engineering,” Titus said, motioning to Isaac and Paul.

“Do we have any idea how long it’s going to take us to get back?”

“As long as it takes is the best we can tell you at the moment,” Paul answered.  “A lot depends on whether or not Az got the reactor back online.”

“Do you doubt?”

“Not really.  But given the way this trip has gone so far, I figure it’s better to assume the worst and hope for the best.”  No one could even begin to argue with that logic.  There was silence for another few minutes, as they finished eating while they contemplated both Paul’s words as well as things that needed to be taken care of before they arrived back at the Nebula.  Then Danny spoke up.

“Can we plan to maybe meet back here for a late meal?  Just to try and see where we all are and get some kind of game plan for the rest of this trip back to the Nebula?” he asked.  “Maybe Eli and Arianna can join us - it already feels like forever that things have been….”  He trailed off and sighed.  “I miss Jake being here and filling in the blanks with all those peculiar expressions of his.”

“I’d like to make a suggestion,” Kai offered, and blushed when all eyes turned his way. He cleared his throat.  “Um… I think we should try to get back to our schedule.  We’re going to need the rotating cycles we were on before we got sent away from the Nebula and forced to be up for so long.  I just think the sooner we get back to what passes as normal for us, the better off we’ll be.”

There were nods and murmurs of agreement throughout the room after a pause to consider his words.  Then Deborah stood up and sighed.  “Guess that means I’ll try to get a little more rest.  I’m not due on shift until this evening.”

“Me either,” agreed Danny and Isaac together.  A few others nodded their heads.

“I’ll ask Arianna to let everyone know when to meet back here for a team meeting and late meal.  So those of you that are headed back to bed for a bit, be sure to check your notifications when you start stirring around again.”

It didn’t take long, and everyone had recycled their trash and were scattering to various parts of the ship to take care of the responsibilities for which they were scheduled. 

************

Luke stepped onto the bridge, surprised to find Aphrodite sitting at the console, monitoring things alone.  She didn’t even look up when he crossed the threshold.  He cleared his throat and lifted a hand to scratch at the back of his neck.

“Um… Aphrodite?”

She risked a brief glance in his direction, then turned her attention back to the readouts in front of her.  “Oh, hey, Luke.  Something I can help your gnarly self with?”

“I was just looking for Eli?”

“She’s down in sick bay.  There wasn’t anything wrong, per se, but monitoring Jake and Naomi from here just isn’t the same as seeing things with her own eyes, ya know?  And you know Eli is pretty hands on about… well, pretty much everything.  We noticed you kids were moving around, so we knew someone would be up here shortly to relieve us.”

“Is she…?  Has she…?”

“She’s still not fully transformed, if that’s what you’re asking.  Oh, hey, Hannah,” she greeted as the young woman walked onto the bridge.  “How ya feeling, Sugar?” 

“Much better, thank you,” she replied with a smile.  “If you’d like to go get something to eat and some rest, I’m here to relieve you.”

Aphrodite took one last look at the monitors and nodded her head.  “That sounds like a plan, Stan.  I never realized how utterly exhausting it is to like be human, and sit still for like, freaking ever.  Pretty sure my butt cheeks are numb.”  She frowned.  “Never had that problem before.”  She shrugged.  “Whatever.”  She turned to Luke.  “I think Eli wanted to spend some time in your infirmary to see if she could do anything.  Don’t know if you need to be there or not.  Ya might wanna give her a little time to see what she can do first.”

Luke nodded.  “I’ve got some other stuff I need to work on - things I let slide in the interim we were in emergency mode.”

She patted his crossed arms.  “Sounds good.  It’ll give her a chance to work some things out for herself.  Besides, she’s always got her little hot mama if she needs some support.”

“You mean Arianna?”

Aphrodite rolled blue eyes.  “Really?? Who else??  As if!!  You know those two are….”

“I know; I know!” Luke agreed, raising a conciliatory hand.  “I just don’t think I’ve ever heard her or anyone else described that way before.”

“Because you’re all about political correctness, babe.  I just tell it like it is.”

He chuckled.  “I suppose you do.  Can I escort you somewhere before I go to my work area?”

“Maybe to the mess hall?” tucking her hand into the crook of his proffered arm.  “Then I need to figure out where to get a little shut-eye.  I have a feeling this ‘being human’ thing is totally a lot harder than it looks.”

“Some days more than others,” he agreed again, as he patted her hand.  “We’ll figure something out for you and Cupid.  I’m not sure you want to be stuck in the med bay, but it’s about the only place we have any extra sleeping space.  We were never supposed to have guests on this ship.”

Aphrodite laughed as she pulled him toward the door.  “Well, never let it be said that the gods did anything they were supposed to do.  Life would’ve been a whole lot different if we had.”

“For all of us, I suspect,” Luke answered as they moved off the bridge.  Hannah kept her attention focused on the readouts in front of her, and in another moment, Isaac joined her and they settled down to monitoring their progress back toward the Nebula.

************

Eli walked into the infirmary on silent feet.  She kind of appreciated the parts of her dragon sense she still retained - mainly, extraordinary sight and hearing.  She could tell just by listening that both Naomi and Jacob were maintaining good, clear breath sounds, so even if they had not improved, they were holding their own.  A third, deeper breathing let her know that Eden was sleeping by Jacob, and it brought a small smile to her face.  They may not be as committed to one another as she and Arianna were, but she knew they were far more than the ‘just casual’ attitude they had always been so careful to portray.  Still, she hoped this didn’t push them into something they weren’t really ready for either.

She stepped over to where Naomi lay peacefully resting, checking her chart even as she monitored her vitals.  Pleased with the strength of the heartbeat she felt against her fingertips, she made a couple notations and moved on to do a few more cursory tests.  Everything looked good.  Naomi’s body had started producing more of the blood that she needed to restore her supply, and her brain activity was what Eli expected to see after such a trauma.  A tiny bit of color had returned to her cheeks and overall, her prognosis for a full recovery was promising.

She decided to leave her stasis field in place for a while longer.  It wouldn’t hurt and giving Naomi’s body more uninterrupted recovery time could only help her to heal more fully.  With a nod, Eli, eased the blanket higher up Naomi’s body, and turned her attention to Jacob.

Jacob had not been moved since being placed in the stasis field that was keeping him from bleeding out. Eli took a long moment to study him, and the damage that she had done when she’d been thrown into him, and winced when she realized her initial assessment still stood - she was going to have to completely rebuild and restructure his arm.  She glanced down at her still clawed hands and wondered what she could do to move beyond whatever was keeping her locked into this in-between stage of transformation.  Aside from the lack of verbal communication, it was entirely frustrating to know there was work to be done - healing to do - that you were the one most qualified to accomplish, and unable to do so because of your own subconscious… or whatever was keeping her prisoner in this form.

She shifted her attention to Eden for a moment - her second-in-command and best friend outside of Arianna - and frowned at the utter exhaustion she could see written clearly not only in her features, but also in her posture and body language.  She turned and grabbed a blanket from the nearby cabinet, thankful it was already warm as she wrapped it around Eden’s shivering body.  The warmth made black eyes blink open slowly, and Eden smiled.

“Hey, Boss!  How ya feelin’?” her speech slurred with sleep.

Eli shrugged and gave her a small smile, before she signed, Pretty good… a little frustrated, holding up her taloned hands.  I need to fix this….

Eden sat up enough to clasp Eli’s claws in her free hand.  “You will.  We both know there is no way Az is going to let you stay like this for any length of time.  So even if you can’t figure it out, you know she will… if only so you two can continue to do nasty things together.”

“What makes you think we can’t do that now, Eden?” Arianna asked as she swept into the room and into Eli’s waiting arms.  “You forget… I’ve known about this side of my Amado for much longer than the rest of you.  Who’s to say what we’ve done with one another in various stages other metamorphosis?” leaning down to capture Eli’s lips and smiling into the kiss, feeling the heat fade from bright green cheeks as they relaxed into one another and the bond they shared.

“All right you two!” Eden hissed.  “I don’t need a graphic example of what you two do in your own time.  Get a room!” though she couldn’t help the smile that crept onto her face at their display.  It soothed her in a way she hadn’t expected.

They slowly pulled away from one another, staring into each other’s eyes for a long minute before rubbing their noses together. Arianna held Eli’s gaze for another moment, before clearing her throat and turning to Eden.

“Sorry,” she apologized, sounding almost sincere.  “Certain people,” glaring at Eli who just smirked in response, “wound me up before we started our shift.”

“Of course she did,” Eden muttered.

“And then, not only did I get the reactor back online,” Arianna continued blithely, “but I think I know how to fix this little situation,” motioning to Eli’s form.

Eden’s eyes widened and Eli’s brown twitched into her hairline.  “You know how to get the boss back to normal… ish?” grinning when Eli sneered at her.

“I think so,” Arianna qualified.  “I won’t know for sure until we test it, but I’ve got high hopes.”

“So what’s the plan?” Eden asked before Eli could begin signing. 

“We’re going to have breakfast with Cupid and Aphrodite.  And then we’ll see.”

“We’ll see what?”

“We’ll see what happens from there,” Arianna replied causing twin frowns on both countenances in front of her.  She sighed.  “Trust me on this.  I think it will get the answers we need, but we’ll have to play it by notes after that.”  She cocked her head.  “I don’t think that’s right.”  She looked at Jacob.  “I’ll be glad when he’s able to correct me on these things again.”

“Sooner than you think, Az.  I’ve got full confidence in the Boss… and in you.”

“Ooooh… speaking of,” she said, pulling her Pad from her pocket.  “I worked up a prototype design for Jacob’s new arm last night.”  She handed the Pad to Eli.  “I thought you could deal with the intricate, special details, but at least this would give you a starting point.  I could ask the guys in Engineering to start building it, if you’d like,” added a little shyly.

Eli accepted the Pad and scrolled through the schematics, eyebrows creeping back onto her forehead at the amount of detail Arianna had provided.  She snatched Arianna into a firm embrace, rocking them together back and forth as she trembled with excitement.

I can work with this, she signed enthusiastically.  This is an amazing piece of technology.  Thank you, Beloved.  You’ve just made my work so much easier and Jacob’s chances for a better than new recovery are outstanding.

“So you don’t think I overstepped?”

I think you’re pretty perfect, smiling before she leaned over and kissed Arianna with more than a hint of intensity.

“Can I see?” Eden asked, causing them to break their kiss sooner than intended.

Eli sighed and nodded, then passed over the Pad.  Eden’s eyes widened in amazement the longer she studied Arianna’s work.  Finally, she swallowed hard.  “This is spectacular, Az.  Jake will be thrilled - hell, I’m a little jealous.  Do you think maybe I could start building it?”

Eli and Arianna exchanged glances and Eli shrugged.  Arianna nodded. “I think that would be an excellent idea.  Do you want us to bring you some breakfast before we go to lay down for a little while?”

“Sounds good,” Eden responded distractedly, mind already shifting into building mode.”If things stay quiet and non-threatening for a little while, I may get one of the guys to come up here and help me.”

“Just make sure you take care of yourself,” Arianna cautioned.  “You don’t want Eli to have to treat you for neglecting yourself.”

“Um hmm.…” Eden muttered as she rose from her seat and started notating the tools she’d need.  She risked a glance at them.  “Why are you still here?  Don’t you have other places to be and things to take care of?  I got this, so go,” glaring when they gave her indulgent smiles.  “Go. Now.” she commanded.  “We’ll start getting this ready so it’s done when you’re ready to go again.  Enjoy your breakfast.”  Then she turned her back and started making her lists in earnest.  Eli and Arianna traded looks and shrugs before clasping hands and exiting the infirmary, moving out the door and down to the mess hall where Cupid and Aphrodite were patiently ensconced, waiting for them.

It was time to get Eli back to herself - even if that wasn’t… strictly normal.

Chapter LX

“So,” Arianna began as she clasped her hand around Eli’s while they made their way down the corridor.  “I talked to Gay on my way to the infirmary.  I asked her to join us.”  Eli cocked an eyebrow and Arianna smiled.  She’d forgotten how much silent communication they were capable of even without the link they had shared earlier that had allowed them to actually speak to one another through thought.  “I thought you might need her support… our support… to hear what’s coming.”

Eli frowned and slid her hand from Arianna’s grip.  You know?  You know what’s wrong?

Arianna nodded slowly.  “I think I do.  It’s what helped me figure out what it might take to fix this.”

Another frown… deeper this time.  Does it bother you so much then… having me in this form?

Now Arianna glared.  “You know better.  You know I love you no matter how you appear!  Need I remind you….” tapering off when Eli’s fingers covered her mouth.  She put her hands on her hips and raised an eyebrow.  Eli smiled and removed her hand, holding it up as a measure to ask Arianna to allow her to finish.

I am sorry, Beloved.  It’s just….

“It bothers you to remain in this form - halfway between two worlds.  And you’re frustrated; I can feel it.  I’m just trying to make things better for you.”

I know… I know.  I’m just a little worried about what could be so horrible that it’s kept me from transforming… especially when there is so much work I need to be doing.  Jacob isn’t….

“Hush, Amado.  You’re going to work yourself up into a state before we even get to the mess hall.  Jacob is all right for now - the stasis chamber is strong and keeping him safe; Eden is working on building his new arm, which, to be perfectly honest and not at all humbly,” she added with a smirk, “is going to be amazing.  He’s going to be able to do some incredible things, if she builds it according to the specs I gave her.”  She frowned.  “We might want to check that, actually.  He’ll be able to give her a run for her money now if she follows the blueprint.”  Eli laughed and Arianna snorted.  “Anyway, Hannah has her hearing back and Kai’s back is healed and Naomi is improving.  Let’s focus on getting you better, and then we can worry about the rest.  One problem at a time, yeah?”

Eli nodded.  Yeah.

They crossed the threshold into the mess hall where Abigail, Cupid, and Aphrodite were waiting patiently.  The latter two were eating something, though judging by the faces they were making it was more of an adventure for them than they had expected it to be.  Arianna seated Eli next to Abigail and walked to the cupboard to grab a couple meals.  Then she took a seat on Eli’s other side, passing her a meal and pressing up against her side.

Awkward silence reigned for several minutes while they all made an effort to appear busy eating.  Finally, Eli couldn’t stand it any longer.  All right, she signed.  I don’t know what the deal is, but this is going to drive me crazy if someone doesn’t start talking soon, glaring at everyone around her.

Cupid sighed.  He’d known it was going to be difficult.  He hadn't realized just how impossibly difficult  it was going to be.  He pushed his uneaten food to one side, knowing he couldn’t waste it, but unable to finish until he was done speaking with Eli.  He cleared his throat and looked directly at her, noting for the first time that her eyes were more golden than hazel, and the slit more than a little unnerving.

“Do you remember your time as a dragon?” wincing when she frowned at him.  “Let me rephrase - do you remember what happened with the Nebula and the Storm Surge?  Do you actually remember becoming a dragon and everything that followed?”

I remember becoming a dragon on the planet; flying into space; breathing fire into the ship’s engine core….  She frowned again.  I don’t… it gets a little blurry after that.  I know I nearly killed Jacob landing on top of him.

“Well, you got some of it right, anyway. But you also seem to be missing a pretty big chunk.  Do you remember hitting your head and losing consciousness?”

No?  Maybe?  I’m not really sure.  It feels like time is missing, but….  She shook her head.  It’s all pretty vague.

“I’ll bet,” he mumbled.  “There was a lot going on.  Um… after you blew fire into the exhaust port, it did exactly what you expected it to do - it restarted the transwarp core.  But the instant restart caused the ship to shudder and slam into you, knocking you unconscious.  It and the Nebula actually - which we believe actively pushed you away from the impending explosion and towards the Outreach - but you weren’t able to help it along because the sheer force of the two combined knocked you out.  So I went into your mind.”

Why?

“Because we,” motioning between himself and Aphrodite, “needed you to wake up.  The only chance any of us had for survival was for you to be awake so you could actively try to get us back to the Outreach.  Do you remember?”

Eli’s brow furrowed.  Maybe? She signed again with a frustrated huff.  I don’t….

Cupid leaned forward and reached out his hands, palms up.  “Will you trust me?  Will you give me your hands?”

Eli shuddered, wincing away from Cupid and his touch.  Why?  It hurts when you touch me - it makes me nauseous and uncomfortable.

“I’m sure it does,” Cupid agreed softly, “but I promise you will understand a lot better if you’ll just trust me with this.  Arianna will help ground you and Abigail will do the same.”  He sighed.  “Please, Ellie,” the name causing Eli’s eyes to bulge comically wide.  “I promise it will all make sense to you if you’ll just trust me.”

She studied his face for a long moment, searching his eyes for answers she wasn’t entirely certain she was ready to hear.  She felt Arianna link their fingers together on one side of her, while Abigail clutched her other hand at the wrist.  She took a deep breath and reached forward and placed her hands into Cupid’s, then sucked in another breath to keep from jerking them back out of his grasp.  She closed her eyes and listened to Arianna’s breathing, then forced herself to focus on it until their breathing was in sync.  It made her feel closer to Arianna, as well as calmed the sickness she could feel welling up in her belly.  She clutched Arianna’s hand a little tighter, and felt Abigail tighten her hold as well.  After a few minutes, she opened her eyes and met Cupid’s blue ones… only they weren’t exactly Cupid’s eyes anymore.

The eyes staring back at her now were ones she had seen every time she’d looked in the mirror, with a hint more green than she’d ever managed to have in her hazel.  “Eli?” She questioned tremulously.  She didn’t realize her ability to speak had returned, but the three women at the table gasped when they heard her voice.

“Hi, Ellie,” he answered with the bashful smile he’d always been known for. 

She lifted a hand and cupped his face gently.  “How??  Why??  Oh Eli… gods, I’ve missed you so much.  I’m so sorry - it was my fault….”

“NO!” He cut in fiercely, covering her hand with his.  “No, Ellie - you don’t get to take that choice away from me.  It was my right and my honor to stand beside my mate and defend her and our home.  Besides, it was my time.”  He chuckled.  “It was actually long past my time.  I was so lucky, Ellie - so, so very lucky.  You see, I was supposed to die in the womb, and there is every likelihood that if I had, you would have too.  Even as strong as you were… as you are, that kind of strain could have killed you.  And I knew, even then, you were destined for great things.  So when Cupid gave me the opportunity to live in exchange for the opportunity to be born and live as me…or within me, I guess… I wasn’t going to say no.  Don’t get me wrong - I wanted to live for myself as well.  I very selfishly wanted to grow up and find my One, but I also wanted to watch you go and be magnificent.”

“How???  How could you possibly know that would happen??”

Elijah smiled again.  “Oh, Ellie… you probably don’t remember, but we had a lot of conversations while we were growing inside MaTb’s belly.  There was such fire and intensity in you even then.  I knew you were destined to be amazing.  When Cupid explained to me what was happening, and offered to help me to live, it firmed up my belief in you.”

“So were you really… really my twin?  Or were you Cupid in a different body?” trying to understand without losing her mind as she wrapped her thoughts around her new reality.

“Yes,” he answered simply, smiling when she glared at him.  “I was your twin - first and always - but Cupid lived in my body to experience everything I did.  He never interfered, and aside from saving my life in the womb, never acted as Cupid until just before I died.”

Eli frowned.  “What do you mean?”

“He offered to save me, Ellie.  He was going to heal the wound I had sustained.”

“What?!?  Why didn’t you let him??  Do you know what losing you…?”

“Yes,” he replied again, taking her hand from his face and bringing it to his lips.  “I do, just like I know how hard it was for Sarah.  But it was a mortal wound.  I couldn’t simply magically recover from that.  If I had, they would have locked me up for experimentation.  They would have taken you and my children and done the same.”  His features hardened.  “I could not, would not allow that to happen.  There was much more at stake than just my life, and my life had already been so much more I’d ever imagined.  I had my One - who, coincidentally, I am still bonded to and can still feel through our link; I had two beautiful children that remind me greatly of the two of us; you were successful beyond my wildest imaginings and were destined for even more greatness.”  He kissed her fingers again.  “It was enough, Ellie - it was more than enough.  It was beyond anything I could have hoped for when Cupid made me his offer.  I was happy, Ellie.  I still am… and so very proud of you.”

“I miss you… so much.”

He smiled.  “I miss you too, but I am so thrilled to have had the extra time - with you; with my mate; watching over my family.”

“Are you leaving?”

He sighed.  “Yes.  In a way, I’ve already been gone a long time, you know… because I died.  It was only my connection to Cupid, who, as an immortal god, was able to allow me a little more latitude than most of our kind.  Because of him, I was able to bear witness to your life in a way others have not been able to access and communicate with anyone other than their chosen One.  Better, I was able to come to you when you needed me to… at least, sometimes - when it was critical.  But now….”

“Now he is fully human, and he can no longer maintain that connection between us.”

“Exactly.  Now, he will go to wherever he calls home, and he will live with his wife and children until he dies.  And I will remain in our afterlife, and will only be able to communicate to the one I am connected to through our mating… Sarah.”

“She’s a very lucky woman.”

He smirked.  “So are you.  I have seen your mate, Ellie, and I have felt how you love one another.  You have something very special - something most here have never known.  It’s beyond our normal bonding.”  He smiled gently at her flummoxed expression.  “Surely you know that?”

She shook her head.  “Not really, no.  I had wondered, but….”

He chuckled.  “If it makes you feel better, I’m the only one who knows other than you, and I only know because I did some checking and asking around.”  He paused.  “I wonder if it has something to do with your ability to transform - if that somehow heights your ability to feel.”

Eli shrugged.  “Perhaps, but I think it has more to do with who and what Arianna and I are to each other… what we’ve always been to one another in every life we’ve lived.”

“And what is that?”

“Eternal Soulmates,” she replied simply, watching his hazel eyes widened.

“You think that… is it possible?”

She laughed lightly.  “Our entire culture is based on it, Brother.  You think it isn’t?”

“I thought is was folklore… legend - something to make celibacy seem like a worthy endeavor until we found the one we were supposed to be destined for.”

She snorted at his pronouncement, then her eyes softened.  “But isn’t having a destined chosen the same as having a Soulmate?” her voice serious.

“Yes, I suppose.  But I don’t think it’s meant in the same regard as what you are referring to as Eternal Soulmates.  Sarah and I were bonded to one another in life, and remain that way despite my death.  We will continue to be mated even in death, as long as neither of us decides to return to the circle.  If that happens, we lose one another, and we’ll go one to a different existence with no memory of or feeling towards each other.  We don’t keep looking for each other after that… at least, not intentionally.  Finding one another again after giving each other up is considered an act of random chance.”

Now Eli’s eyes widened.  “Why is this not common knowledge among our people?”

“Because most are content to stay together in the afterlife.  Most of those who have chosen differently are those whose bonds do not last.  It creates a horrible, unhappy mess for all those involved, and is more than a little disruptive to everyone in the afterlife.  No one is fond of the consequences.”

Eli blinked.  “ I can understand why.”

“Um… but I believe you and your Beloved are the Soulmates of lore - the ones upon whom all the legends are based.”

“Why?  Why would you think that?  You don’t even know Arianna.”

“No, but I do know you and how she has affected you; how she changed everything for you.  And I remember the stories, Ellie.  I know about the origins of our planet and our house.”

“How did I miss this?  Why was I not aware…??”

“Because you were so involved with your studies; with making sure you got into the program of your dreams; and also hiding your true nature from MaTb.”

“You noticed that, did you?”

He gave her a droll, dry look.  “Ellie, you turned into a dragon. It was a little hard to miss.”

“Makes you wonder how MaTb did for so many years.”

“Other than she wasn’t really looking for it?” he responded.  “Probably because she didn’t want to see it.  If she didn’t know, then she couldn’t demand you stay home instead of pursuing your dreams.  However, if that’s the truth, you’re going to have some serious explaining to do the next time you talk to her.”

“Oh, I have a feeling I’m going to have to explain any number of things the next time I see her,” giving him a pointed look.  His eyes grew hard and steely.

“No.  Not about this.  This is between you and me.  MaTb and Sarah have no business knowing any of the things we have talked about - especially regarding me and Cupid.  The only reason I told you is because we - all of us - thought it might help you to recover and finish your transformation.  You don’t get to share this knowledge with anyone not sitting here now.”

“But….”

“No.  I mean it, Ellie.  I did this - we did this for you.  I don’t want MaTb or Sarah to suffer with sleepless nights thinking about the might-haves and could-have-beens and why-not-mes.  There is nothing to be gained by sharing this with them.  Do you understand??”

Hazel eyes met and held for a long moment before Eli nodded her agreement.  “All right.”  She squeezed the hands she held.  “I am glad for this; thankful for the time we’ve had together… both in life and since you’ve been gone.  I’m going to miss you, you know… so much.”

“I’ll miss you more,” grinning at his ability to one-up her, however briefly.  “But you won’t miss me for long.  You have your Soulmate, and an entire planet to colonize and terraform.  You’re going to be extremely busy for a very long time.”

“I suppose.  Doesn’t mean I won’t miss you every day, though.”

“Think of me now and then, but go and live your life.  Be amazing and phenomenal and conquer the  mysteries of the galaxy, then come home and love your mate with all you are.  Be happy, Ellie.  That’s what I want for you - just be happy and loved.”

She smiled at him through tears that she refused to let fall, and tightened her grip again.  “I am, Eli… completely.”

He leaned forward and brushed a kiss across her cheek, before pulling back and meeting her eyes squarely.  “Good,” he whispered.  “I love you.”

“I love you,” she replied, even as she watched him fade from her view.  When she blinked, all she saw was Cupid in front of her.  He met her eyes compassionately, smiling when he realized her transformation was complete. 

“Now do you understand?”

She nodded slowly.  “I think so,” she answered.  “Thank you, but I think I need to go lay down for a little while.  I feel a little….” not conscious to see Arianna and Abigail both leap forward to keep her from tumbling to the floor.  Cupid came around the table and scooped her into his arms.

“If you will lead the way,” he said, motioning to Arianna with his head, “I’ll carry her to your rooms so you can both get some rest.  I know I could do with some as well.”

Arianna nodded and scampered to get in front of him.  “I think that sounds like a wonderful idea.  Thank you, Cupid.”

“I’m glad I could assist,” said as he walked into their quarters and placed Eli upon their bed.  “Now if you could tell me where Mom and I might be able to get a few hours of sleep…?”

“Gay, would you show them to Eli’s rooms for now?” knowing Abigail would agree without protest. She turned to Aphrodite.  “We haven’t removed the wall to combine our quarters yet, so it is the only empty quarters available.  There’s only one bed though.”

“We’ll make do, Sugar.  Thank you.  We’ll talk about all of this later?”

“Probably.  But for now….” looking at her teammate, knowing the gods would follow suit.

“Not a word,” Abigail promised, then ushered their guests out the door as they nodded their agreement.  Arianna kicked off her shoes and removed Eli’s then crawled into bed and wrapped herself around her mate.  She was asleep in moments.

Chapter LXI

Eli blinked her eyes open slowly, looking around with blurred vision and slowed reflexes.  She listened for a moment, before a smile covered her face, then she closed her eyes again in contentment.  She might still feel like she got hit by a space cruiser, but she had resumed her humanoid form, and for now, that was enough.

************

It was several hours later before an insistent knocking at their door woke both Eli and Arianna from a dreamless sleep.  They smiled lazily at one another, exchanging only a brief chaste kiss before the pounding interrupted them again.  Eli huffed and threw the covers off of them, ready to scramble from the bed and wrench open the portal.  Only a hand on her wrist stopped her and she looked at Arianna with the question written firmly on her countenance.

“It worked, Amado,” she whispered with delight.  “It worked.  How do you feel?”

Eli gave her a gentle smile.  “Like myself again.”

Arianna grinned.  “So absolutely amazing, hmm?”

“Something like that,” she agreed with a grin… which immediately dissolved into a frown when the beating on the door was interspersed with Eden’s impatient voice.

“I know you’re awake in there!  It’s been hours and hours, and Cupid and Aphrodite have been up and worked another shift while the two of you have been doing who-knows-what nasty things to each other!  Now get up and come out here and….”  She trailed off when the door suddenly opened to find two very unamused teammates staring back at her with their arms crossed in an identical pose of general unhappiness.   “Oh,” she smiled nervously.  “Hi, Boss… Boss’ wife.”  She looked closer and could just see the twinkling in both sets of eyes and relaxed, smiling genuinely as she recognized Eli’s transformation.  “Good to see you back to yourself, Eli.  We’ve missed you,” the sentiment more heartfelt than any of them had expected to hear so plainly.

“It’s good to be missed, but it’s better to be back,” Eli replied.  “So what in pick-your-gods-name is so important you needed to wake us up??”

Eden took a second, good look at them, and realized the only thing they had been doing for hours had been sleeping.  She shook her head.  “Nothing, really.  We were just concerned.  You’ve been asleep for almost an entire cycle.  The only time you’ve missed time like that has been….”

“… when we were recovering from something fairly traumatic?” Eli asked with an understanding smile.  “Yes, this was pretty much that for me.  And since Arianna and I are connected….”

“She sleeps too - got it,” scratching the back of her neck.  “Sorry.  I’ll just….”

“What brought you to our door, Eden?” Arianna asked in sympathy.  Rarely did they ever see Eli’s second so out of sorts.

“I ummm… I finished building Jake’s new arm, and it’s ready for testing.  I thought you both might want to be there.”

“We would, Eden - thank you,” Eli answered.  “How about you call a team meeting in the mess hall in thirty minutes?  That will give us a chance to clean up and wake up a little bit and give everyone else a chance to get their things together.  Then we’ll go run some tests on that arm.  As soon as it checks out, I’ll see about getting Jake into surgery so we can do the repairs he needs and wake him up.”

Eden offered them a relieved smile.  “I’ll be happy to see that.”

“Us too.”

“Kay… yeah.  I’ll just go get everyone together.  I think a team meeting will help shift us back into some semblance of normalcy.”

Eli frowned.  “Problems?”

Eden shook her head.  “No more than usual.  Just trying to get back to our round-the-clock schedules after operating in crisis mode again.”  She blew out a breath and unsettled the hair around her face.  “I will be so happy to see that moon.  I’m ready to be done with this traveling thing for a while.”

“Same,” Arianna concurred while Eli just nodded her agreement.  “I don’t expect it to be all sunshine and rainbows, but maybe it won't be craziness after crises.”

“That’s be nice,” Eli and Eden replied together, causing them to stare at one another for a moment before they all started snickering.  It took a minute for Eden to clear her throat and suck in a deep breath.  Then she spoke.

“Right.  Well, let me go stir everyone up, and we’ll be in the mess hall when you two are ready to join us.”

“We’ll be there shortly, Eden.  Thanks,” Eli offered as she reached out and squeezed Eden’s arm.  Eden patted her hand and nodded as she stepped back and walked away without a backwards glance.  Eli and Arianna watched briefly before turning to one another and re-entering their quarters, allowing the door to close behind them.

“So,” Arianna said as they moved toward their en suite.  “We’ll talk about everything later?”

Eli bit her lip pensively and nodded slowly.  “Yes.  I need some time to process everything, but… yes, we’ll talk.  You promised Aphrodite we would, and to me, that’s as good as my word.”

Arianna reached out a hand and clasped Eli’s.  “Good.  Then let’s go get a hot shower and go get something to eat.  I’m starving.”

“Even for packaged meals?”

Arianna’s stomach growled as if on cue and she smiled wryly at Eli.  “Even packaged meals.  I’m not sure I would call it food exactly, but at least it counts as nutrition… mostly.”

Eli snorted.  “So many things wrong with that sentence,” shaking her head.  “Come, Beloved.  There’s still work to be done, and we’ll never get finished if we don’t get started.”

“Truer words,” Arianna agreed, then they stepped into the bathroom, and closed the door behind them.

************

The Alpha Team cheered when Eli and Arianna crossed the threshold, causing them both to blush and laugh.  Their happiness carried over and caused the rest to laugh as well.  After a long moment, they  finally settled a little and Esther wiped her eyes, even as she continued to chuckle.  “Gods, that was amazing.  I needed that.”

“Yeah, think we all did,” Deborah agreed.  “Welcome back, Boss.  Glad to see you back to yourself.”

“I’ve got to admit, it’s pretty fantastic to be back.  I never realized….”  She trailed off, shaking her head, unable or unwilling to give voice to her thoughts.  “Anyway, how is everyone else doing?  I know I only missed a couple days, but it feels like a lot happened while I wasn’t completely myself.”  Silence met her question and she looked around at them with a raised eyebrow.  “Guys?”

Isaac cleared his throat after being nudged by both Paul and Titus.  “Sorry… guess we were all waiting on each other, and we could be here all day doing that.  You know that Arianna and… and Cupid got the reactor back online,” waiting for Eli to nod.  “We mostly got engineering cleaned up.  The torpedoes that we built - the planet killers - they’ve been put away.  We decided not to disassemble them… just in case we might need them again.  We figured it would be better to have them on hand.  Otherwise, it’s pretty much status quo in engineering.  Everything is back to running at peak condition.  As far as we can tell, we should be back to the Nebula in another day if we continue at our present rate of speed.”

“Good to know,” Eli replied with an acknowledging nod.  “Thank you, Isaac.  Anyone else?”

“Yeah,” Esther said, raising her hand slightly.  “It’s a little late, considering, but we got the noise suppression gear working… at least for us.  Hannah is going to test it out to see how well it works for her when we get done here.  At least we’ll have it if we need it again.”

“Excellent.  Good job, ladies,” giving a half bow to Esther and Deborah.  “That was certainly something I don’t think we could have possibly foreseen and you solved that issue nicely.  Hannah, will you let me know how it works out for you?”

“You bet, Boss.  Having experienced what it’s like not to have the hearing I’m accustomed to, I want to be sure it doesn’t happen again.  I don’t know how you guys function when you’re so hard of hearing.”

“I guess it’s all in what you’re used to,” Eli commented before anyone could take offense.  “I noticed a distinct difference when I was caught between forms - something I hadn’t actually recognized before.  Anyone else?  Luke?  Eden?”

“I have something,” Deborah said, “but I’d like to go at the end, if that’s all right with everyone.” 

Heads nodded, though questions were clear in everyone’s eyes and Eli cleared her throat to take attention off of Deborah.  “Luke?”

He clapped his hands together briefly.  “Naomi is doing significantly better - her stats have consistently risen, and she’s almost reached her baseline normal.  I want to remove her from stasis to allow her to begin waking up on her own,” smiling when Eli nodded her approval.  “I also took a look at the arm Az designed and Eden built for Jake.  If it tests out - and I don’t see a reason why it shouldn’t - he will be better than new.  The hardest thing for his adjustment is likely going to be learning control, because there is a lot of power in that appendage.”

“Wonderful news on Naomi, and I concur.  Her vitals were good and she was getting stronger before Arianna and I went to lay down.  I’m actually a little surprised she isn’t up already.  I was going straight from here to the infirmary to check on them both if you’d like to join me.  We can release her from stasis and go over the arm with Arianna and Eden.  Once its been tested, I want to take Jake straight into surgery.  He’s been in stasis long enough.  I don’t want him to get used to the idea that he can just lay around all hours of the day.  Besides,” she added with a tremulous smile, ”we’re due a gaming day,” causing the boys to all smile and clap while the girls just rolled their eyes.  “Anyone else?”

“Yeah,” Mordecai replied.  “We had a little damage in the greenhouses and botany bays, but most of it’s been recovered.  We haven’t lost anything so far, but we’re keeping an eye on a few things.  When the Nebula flung us away from itself, it kind of threw things into disarray. So we’ve been carefully cleaning up and replanting in a few cases, but mostly, we got out unscathed.”

Eli nodded, her expression serious.  “Keep me apprised.  Everything in those bays is considered necessary and critical.  We don’t need to lose anything if it can be avoided.”

“We thought the same,” Titus agreed.  “It’s why we’ve all added a couple hours to our normal shifts to get things taken care of in there.  It actually looks pretty good again.”

Eli rubbed a hand over her face and shook her head.  “I’m sorry, guys.  I seem to have missed a lot just so I could sleep.  Maybe I should….”

“… just not worry about it too much,” Eden interjected.  “We knew what to do, and we took care of it.  You needed to recover from being some sort of crazy-assed hero.  We get it - now you need to.  Even the strongest leader needs to take the time to heal.  The smart ones recognize that fact,” pinning Eli with a force ten glare.

“I know.  I just need to be reminded sometimes.”

“Consider yourself reminded, and let it go.  I’m sure there will be other crises that you can stress over.”

“That’s okay.  I’d be just fine not having crises or stress for a little while.”

“I think we can all agree with that.”

“Okay, so… anything else?”

Deborah looked around the room, waiting to see if any of her teammates had anything left to add.  When they were silent, she stood and opened her Pad.  “I have something.  I finished the research you asked me to do,” looking directly at Eli.  Eli nodded and Deborah did the same before she turned her attention back to the Pad in her hand.  “It was actually kind of interesting,” pressing a button and sending the information to all the Pads in the room.  She allowed them all to open their Pads and take a look at the information before she started speaking again.  “So, I was able to trace all our roots back to the planet, Earth - specifically to ancient Greece.  As you can see, some of us go back to actual gods or goddesses, but all of us are related to the history that happened in that time and place.”

“Wow!”
“How did you…?”
“What does that even mean?”
“How is that possible?”

A shrill whistle interrupted their musings, and silence reigned immediately.  Eden pulled her fingers from her lips and looked at Eli.  “All yours, Boss,” with a smirk.

Eli just shook her head.  “Thank you, Eden.”  She turned her attention back to the remainder of her teammates that returned her scrutiny with gobsmacked expressions.  “Perhaps we should give Deb an opportunity to explain her findings before we start asking questions.”  There were a few sheepish ‘sorries’ muttered around the room, then everyone refocused on Deborah. 

She cleared her throat.  “Um… thanks, Boss.  I can tell you guys that I am pretty confident that these bloodlines are correct; I’ve spent a lot of time gathering this information and studying and disassembling all the facts and myths and legends I could find and correlating them together again.  I mean, there is a slight likelihood I might have missed something, but I don’t think so.”

“So we were these people?” Titus asked.  “Or we’re simply related to them?”

Deborah sighed.  “As far as I can tell, most of us are related to… and descended from… them.”

“Except us,” Arianna added confidently.  Deborah nodded.

“Except you and Eli, yes.  From everything I can determine, you two are actually the reincarnated souls of a warrior and bard that traveled across all of ancient Greece, and many parts of both the European and Asian continents that existed in that time period.”

“How many of us are descended from gods?” Mordecai asked.  “I can’t seem to find….”

“Only two.”

“Only us,” Eli stated, and Deborah confirmed with a brisk nod of her head.

“Only you and Arianna, yes.  The rest of us - well, our ancestors - tie into your history at some point or another with varying degrees of involvement.  Most of the women were Amazons; many of the guys were warriors-in-arms at some point.  But we are all interconnected because of the warrior and the bard.”

Isaac cleared his throat.  “Can I ask who Eli and Arianna are descended from?”

“If I’ve figured it correctly, Eli is descended from Athena and Arianna traces back to Aphrodite.”  A throat clearing from the comm unit overhead startled all of them, and they spent a moment searching before realizing that Aphrodite was replying to them from the bridge. “Aphrodite?” Deborah queried.

“While it’s true that Eli is of Athena’s line, Arianna is actually descended from Artemis.  Together, they were my chosen.”

“Um… wasn’t Artemis a virgin goddess?” Esther asked under her breath to Hannah, not realizing Aphrodite and the rest could still hear her.

Aphrodite cleared her throat, and they could almost hear the embarrassment in her voice.  “Yeah, about that… there were some things we knew better than to question.  That was right at the top.”

“Maybe we can ask when we get back to the Nebula,” Arianna said softly.

“Maybe,” Eli responded.  “Or maybe we’ll just leave it alone.  After all, does it really matter how at this point?”

“I suppose not.”  She looked around the room at the others who were watching them.  “So what does this mean for us?” turning back to Deborah.

“Nothing really, beyond the interest that our extended history together adds to our sense of family.  By everything that I can find, our ancestors overlapped in one manner or another for generations until the two of you managed to blow everything apart.  Once that happened - with all of us being on different planets in different parts of the galaxy - we were no longer intertwined in one another’s lives.  It was only this project that brought us not only into the same sphere, but also the same timeline.  Before this, it appears we were interspersed through several lifetimes, rotating in and out of Arianna and Eli’s lives.”

“I’m not sure whether to be impressed or a little creeped out.”

“Same,” replied several.

“A little of both, I think,” Eden said.  “It’s a little weird to think we’ve always been part of one another’s lives in some shape and form, but it’s kind of cool to know we’ve always kind of been family too.”

“So do you think we were all predestined to be part of the Alpha Team?  Was it meant to happen?”

Eden shrugged.  “I dunno.  But does it really matter?  We’re family now anyway.  And it’s up to who we are now to make this a successful project.  What came before this doesn’t matter - it doesn’t change who we are and what we can do unless we let it.”

“Girl’s got a point.  I mean, I think this is kinda cool, and I’ll probably spend some time looking at my tree and reading up on my ancestors and stuff, but it’s not going to change who am I now nor what I am capable of.”

The others nodded their agreement. Eli looked at her team again and smiled.  “Thank you, Deborah.  You did a great job with this, and I appreciate it.”  Deborah smiled her acceptance of Eli’s words and resumed her seat.  “Now,” Eli continued, “I think we all have other things we need to be doing.  I’ll be in the infirmary if anyone is in dire need, but unless it is an emergency, I ask you not contact me until I notify you otherwise.  I’m going to be attaching Jake’s new arm, and it’s going to take me a while and a lot of concentration.”

“We’ll handle things, Boss,” Paul said, garnering agreement from around the room.  “You go do what you need to do.”

“All right then,” Eli said.  “Let’s do this.”  And without another word, they each headed out to their assignments.

Continued

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