Everlasting Love

A story by Erin Jennifer.

Feedback is always appreciated! E-mail any comments to drumgrrl93@aol.com

Okay. . .so I went to see Moulin Rouge and it got me thinking that underneath it all, Christian and Satine were soulmates, just like Xena and Gabrielle. And then somehow, this idea was born. So, anyway, this is what happens when an idea hits me at 3 a.m., hope you enjoy it.

Disclaimers: All characters and songs included here belong solely to those who created them and no infringement upon their rights is intended whatsoever.

Violence: Nope, oddly enough

Subtext Alert: Yep. I am operating under the assumption that our favorite warrior and bard do indeed love each other very much. That said. . .you won’t find anything explicit here, sorry.

The blazing summer sun beats down unmercifully overhead as two figures push and jostle their way through a boisterous crowd. Impatiently, the tall, raven-haired warrior clears a path for her smaller, fairer companion. A festival is going on and the streets of Thebes are lined with people as poets, jugglers, dancers and various merchants all compete for the attention of those passing by, resulting in a scene of near-chaos. Xena, annoyed by the raucous din and the crush of humanity, is becoming more and more visibly irritated with every moment. Gabrielle, meanwhile is enthralled by the bright swirl of colors and the lilting music heard on the late afternoon air.

"Allright, that’s it. We’re getting out of here," Xena declares, fed up with the noise.

"What? Xena, we just got here. C’mon, you never know, you might actually have some fun. Fun, you remember what that is, right? It’s that thing we never have anymore ‘cause we’re always too busy saving the world," Gabrielle says, half-joking.

Xena shoots her blonde companion a dire look from her ice blue eyes. A drunken festival-goer inadvertently bumps into her from behind and Xena flattens him with a well-placed elbow.

"All these sweaty, drunken idiots are making me edgy. I feel like I can’t even breathe. And look, I’m starting to twitch," Xena growls, pointing at her left eye, which is, indeed, beginning to twitch nervously.

Gabrielle reaches out to touch the warrior’s face, but Xena jerks her head away petulantly. She pulls her hand back, a bit stung by her friend’s reaction.

"Xena, can’t we stay for just a little while longer? Please? There’s a poetry reading that I really wanted to hear."

A short, squat merchant with a greasy, unkempt beard tries to entice Xena with samples of food. She grabs him by the front of his gravy-stained tunic and sends him flying into a stall full of hand-woven baskets, eliciting a startled cry from the vendors.

"We are leaving. I’m not gonna tell you again. Now, let’s go," Xena says.

Gabrielle halts in her tracks and holds up a hand in protest, astounded by the warrior’s words. Prompted in part by the sweltering heat and by her friend’s foul mood, the bard felt her grip on her own temper beginning to slip.

"What did you say? Since when do you tell me anything?" she asks indignantly.

Xena awkwardly attempts to backtrack. "Wait, Gabrielle, I didn’t mean . . . ."

"No, hold on a minute and let me finish," Gabrielle interrupts, angry now. "You never listen to me and I’m getting really tired of you taking me for granted. You just assume that I’ll follow wherever you decide to go. Well, I’m your friend, Xena, not your puppy dog."

"I thought we were becoming more than friends," Xena mutters under her breath, too low for Gabrielle to hear.

"What?" the bard asks.

Xena doesn’t respond, instead she merely stares stubbornly at the dusty ground in front of her. Gabrielle shakes her head and lets out a frustrated sigh.

"I want to stay and enjoy the festival, Xena."

"Fine. Whatever. You do what you want. I’m leaving," Xena stomps away angrily, leaving Gabrielle looking after her, hurt and confused.

After a handful of steps, Xena stops and look back, but the crowd is blocking her view and she can no longer see the bard. She hesitates, uncertain, but finally moves on, pushing her way through the throng of bodies. She doesn’t stop again until she outside the gates of the city and heading down the road leading away from Thebes. A fallen tree limb rests alongside the well-travelled path, and Xena sits down to wait, not quite daring to hope that Gabrielle will come after her.

Meanwhile, Gabrielle has moved to a quieter part of the city, leaving the noisy celebration behind. She takes a seat on the deserted steps of the temple of Aphrodite and dejectedly lowers her head into her hands, choking back the tears threatening to spill from her sea green eyes. Just a few days ago, before they arrived in Thebes, everything had been so different. It had seemed to her that she and Xena were growing closer, that their feelings towards each other, their relationship was changing, deepening. Twice in the last couple of days, in fact, Gabrielle had been almost certain that Xena was going to kiss her. Now, she wasn’t so sure. A terrifying thought suddenly occurs to the bard.

"What if Xena doesn’t come back?" she wonders aloud. "Or worse, what if she does come back only to tell me that she wants to go on alone?"

That idea nearly sends Gabrielle into a fresh wave of tears. Unable to stand the thought of losing Xena’s friendship, she begins to imagine her own response if Xena returned to say good-bye. In a voice tinged with grief, she begins to sing. . . .

You and me. We used to be together. Every day together, always.

Now I really feel that I’m losing my best friend. I can’t believe this could be the end.

It looks as though you’re letting go. And if it’s real, well I don’t want to know.

Don’t speak. I know what you’re saying, so please stop explaining. Don’t tell me cause it hurts.

Don’t speak. I know what you’re thinking and I don’t need your reasons.

Don’t tell me cause it hurts.

It’s all ending. I gotta stop pretending who we are. . . .

You and me. I can see us dying. Are we?

Don’t speak. I know what you’re saying, so please stop explaining. Don’t tell me cause it hurts.

Don’t speak. I know what you’re thinking and I don’t need your reasons.

Don’t tell me cause it hurts.

High on Mt. Olympus, the goddess of love watches her two favorite mortals.

"What am I going to do with those two? I’d better get down there before they really make a mess of things."

With a saucy snap of her fingers, Aphrodite vanishes in a shower of gold, not realizing that Ares was also watching their plight. The beginnings of a plan form in his head and a cocky smirk spreads slowly across his bearded face as he disappears in a flash of light.

Twilight has fallen, bringing with it a slight respite from the searing summer heat. Under a sky twinkling brightly with stars, Gabrielle is still seating alone on the temple steps, while outside the city, beneath the same sky, Xena waits. With every moment that passes, the warrior’s heart sinks a little further as she begins to fear that she has finally driven Gabrielle away for good.

"It’s probably for the best," she tells herself unconvincingly. "I’m no good for her. If she stayed with me, I’d just end up hurting her."

A lonely owl hoots in a nearby tree and Xena sends a sardonic smile in its direction.

"Yeah, no sense in falling in love," Xena addresses the owl sarcastically. "Creatures like you and me are destined to wind up alone. Good thing I never told her how I felt."

Valiantly trying to bury the sadness threatening to overwhelm her, Xena rises from her seat on the tree limb, intending to leave Thebes, and Gabrielle, behind. She looks back, searching desperately for some sign that she should stay. But finding none, she begins to walk away.

Back at the temple, Gabrielle’s thoughts are straying down the same dark path.

"Maybe it’s best that I never told her I loved her," the bard whispered. "I mean, it probably wouldn’t have worked out anyway. We’re so different. She’s strong and brave and heroic. Everything I’m not. Maybe I’m just destined to be alone."

I’m nobody’s wife and I’m nobody’s baby. I like it way, but then again, maybe. . . .

Now I’m nobody’s valentine and I’m nobody’s pearl. When you get right down to it, I always seem to find just, some girl. . . .

There are monsters, there are angels. There’s a peacefulness and a rage inside us all.

There is sugar and there is salt. There is ice and there is fire in every single heart.

There are monsters, there are angels.

Gazing up above at the cold, impersonal stars, Xena picks up the song. . . .

Well I’m nobody’s promise and I’m nobody’s chore. And I ain’t got nobody that I feel I gotta live for. Nobody to live for.

And I’m nobody’s work and I ‘m nobody’s company and every time I turn around I always seem to find, just me. . . .

There are monsters, there are angels. There’s a peacefulness and a rage inside us all.

There is sugar and there is salt. There is ice and there is fire in every single heart.

There are monsters, there are angels.

I’m nobody’s wife and I’m nobody’s baby. I like it that way, but then again, maybe . . . .

Then again maybe . . .

Gabrielle: I’m nobody’s valentine and I’m nobody’s pearl. When you get right down to it, I

always seem to find just, some girl, some girl. . . .

Both: There are monsters, there are angels. There’s a peacefulness and a rage inside us all.

There is sugar and there is salt. There is ice and there is fire in every single heart.

There are monsters, there are angels.

In a sudden shimmer of light, Aphrodite appears in front of the startled young bard, causing Gabrielle to nearly topple down the steps. The goddess of love giggles as the blonde woman regains her balance.

"Sorry. Didn’t mean to scare ya like that," Aphrodite apologizes.

Gabrielle gives her a small, sad smile. "It’s okay. You just surprised me, that’s all. What are you doing here, Aphrodite?"

"Sweetie, what do you think? You’re the one singing sad love songs on the steps of my temple. Of course I came to help."

Gabrielle blushes slightly and looks down at her feet. She spreads her hands apart and shrugs her shoulders sheepishly.

"I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to trouble you."

With a sunny smile plastered on her face, Aphrodite dismisses the bard’s apology with a wave of her hand.

"Don’t be sorry, honey. We goddesses of love live for this kind of thing. Now tell me what I can do to help you fix this."

Gabrielle begins to pace back and forth, running both hands through her fair hair as she tells Aphrodite everything that has happened between her and Xena in the last few days. The goddess of love listens attentively and nods sympathetically at the appropriate intervals. Finally, she bestows a dazzling grin on the bard.

"I know just the thing. . . . I’ll just put a love spell on the crazy warrior chick, and zap!" the goddess declares when the bard ends her tale of woe.

Gabrielle eyes her doubtfully, "I don’t know, Aphrodite. I don’t think Xena would like it if she found out I won her heart with a love spell."

Aphrodite rolls her eyes. "Okay, first of all, what she doesn’t know won’t hurt her. And second, you already have her heart, silly. We just need to get the stubborn girl to accept that. Wait here, I’ll be right back."

Another wave of her hand and the goddess disappears. Left by herself again, Gabrielle slaps her hand over her eyes, wondering just what kind of trouble she’s gotten herself into now. After a few minutes have passed, Aphrodite reappears with six scantily clad women dressed in the same flimsy pink material as the goddess herself. Raising a single blonde eyebrow, Gabrielle eyes them all skeptically.

"Relax, sweetheart. They’re my disciples. Can’t do a good love spell without them," Aphrodite informs the bard.

"Uh-huh. What exactly do they do?" Gabrielle asks doubtfully as the love chicks coo and preen in the background.

"They my backup singers," Aphrodite replies matter-of-factly. "Okay, all I need you to do is close your eyes and think of Xena. Me and my girls will take care of the rest."

The goddess nods at her encouragingly and Gabrielle shuts her eyes and lets her mind fill with images of Xena. Her head spins and she can dimly hear music swirling in the air around her. She is vaguely aware of Aphrodite and her disciples moving in circles around her. Words form themselves into a chant inside her head, and almost unconsciously, the bard opens her mouth to let them spill out.

Gabrielle: I’ve tried and tried to capture you. What more can one mere mortal do?

Dite & girls: My love potion boils and bubbles. Poison darts. Red poison apples.

Kafe kasita, non kafels. Gutrune takes Siegfried from Brunhilde.

Enula compana on St. James’ eve. A dash of orange and ambergris.

Incantate: Miss Mary Mack, Mack, Mack all dressed in black.

Enchantra Endora Tabitha

Esmerelda Clara Hagatha

My love potion boils and bubbles. Poof! Goes all my toil and troubles.

Blueberry wine and gladiola. Circe takes Glaucus away from Sylla.

Coriander, vervain and ginger root. Damiana, henbane and badger’s foot.

Incantation with magic black and silver buttons all down her back.

Enchantra Endora Tabitha

Esmerelda Clara Hagatha

The chant ends and Gabrielle opens her eyes uncertainly to find Aphrodite standing alone in front of her. She rapidly blinks away some of the dizziness still plaguing her head.

"So, did it work?" she asks.

"Like a charm . . .get it? Like a charm?" Aphrodite giggles and Gabrielle gives her a wry, half-hearted grin in return.

"Aw, come on, Gabby. Think positive. I bet Xena’s outside town right now, just waiting for you to show up," the goddess tries to raise the bard’s spirits. She smiles as a sparkle of hope begins to gleam in the young blonde’s eyes.

"Do you really think Xena’s waiting for me?" Gabrielle inquires hopefully.

"Hey, they don’t call me the love goddess for nothing," with that, Aphrodite vanishes again in another shower of golden light.

Gabrielle smiles, filled with new confidence as she moves down the steps of the temple towards the direction of the city gates.

Behind her, Thebes is rapidly shrinking in the distance as Xena’s long strides carry her further away from the city with every step. A sudden prickling on the back of her neck forces her to stop and she scans the air around her suspiciously.

"Come on out, Ares. I know you’re there," she scowls menacingly.

"One of these days, you’ve just got to tell me how you do that," Ares says with a smirk as he appears in front of her.

Xena fixes him with a cool stare, not speaking as she folds her arms across her chest.

Ares grins at her impudently.

"Doing the badass warrior routine, are we? That’s okay with me. I like it when you play rough."

Xena rolls her eyes in disgust. "What do you want, Ares? I’m not in the mood for your games."

Mock outrage dances in the god of war’s dark eyes as he clutches a hand to his chest with a wounded flourish. Xena glares at him impatiently as she rubs her thumb along the finely-honed edge of the chakram at her hip.

"Look, I heard about the little spat between you and the bard. I came to see if there was anything I could do to help," Ares says with an insincere smile.

Xena cocks an eyebrow at him in disbelief and lets out a short, humorless laugh.

"You’re kidding, right?" she says as she begins to walk forward again.

Ares is forced to backpedal rapidly to keep Xena from crashing into him. He hurriedly moves to the side and falls in next to her, matching her pace easily. Putting a hand on her arm, he forces her to stop.

"I’m serious, Xena. I thought maybe you could use a nice, broad shoulder to cry on," he pats his own leather-clad shoulder invitingly.

"Ares, if I was going to cry on anybody’s shoulder, it sure as Hades wouldn’t be yours."

Behind Xena’s head, Ares can see Gabrielle approaching in the distance and a wicked idea pops into his mind. Putting on his most charming expression, he slides an arm around the tall warrior’s tense shoulders. She tries to pull away, but he hangs on determinedly.

"C’mon, Xena. I can sympathize. I know what it feels like to be rejected by the one you love," he says.

Wrenching free from his grasp, Xena turns to face Ares, her eyes blazing angrily.

"Cut the crap! You do not love me. And you don’t know what you’re talking about anyway," she snaps at him.

Ares risks another quick glance behind Xena and he sees that Gabrielle has stopped. They’ve been spotted, and the bard is watching them with a curious look on her face. The war god chuckles inwardly. So far, his plan is working perfectly. Xena is still ranting at him, but Ares doesn’t hear a word she says. Before she can react, he leans in and silences her with a passionate kiss, his lips muffling her strangled cry of surprise.

As this scene unfolds in front of her, Gabrielle gasps in shock. She can’t believe what she’s seeing, Xena in the arms of someone else. . .Ares, no less. A jealous flame begins to burn brightly in her heart, drowning out the tiny inner voice of reason warning her that there has to be a perfectly logical explanation for this. Feeling hurt and betrayed, the bard turns and runs back to the town before Xena can see her.

With a vicious thrust, Xena slams her knee into Ares’ groin, eliciting a yelp from the god. She pulls away from his unwelcome embrace and yanks her sword from its sheath with a steely hiss. Backing away, she puts the blade between herself and Ares, who looks at her in amusement.

"You know you can’t hurt me with that thing," he reminds her condescendingly.

She simply stares at him with that "don’t try my patience" look in her eyes. Suddenly, she notices that Ares’ gaze is focused not on her, but somewhere behind her. She turns her head, and her heart nearly stops as she sees Gabrielle fleeing back down the road towards Thebes. With a sickening lurch, she realizes that the bard must have seen everything and misinterpreted the situation. She turns back to Ares, truly furious now, and judging by the self-satisfied smirk on his face, she recognizes that she has been played. This was his intention all along, to drive a deeper wedge between her and Gabrielle.

"You self-centered bastard! You were planning this the whole time," she accuses him with a snarl.

The smirk disappears from the god’s face and irritation flashes in his eyes as he meets Xena’s gaze.

"Forget about the irritating blonde, Xena. You don’t need her when you can have me."

Xena gives him an incredulous look, as if she can’t believe what she’s hearing from him.

"That is my choice, not yours. And believe me, Ares, if it comes down to a decision between you and her. You’ll lose every time."

A deep growl rumbles up from Ares’ chest and he hurls a fireball at a nearby tree in pure vexation. Smoke rises from the scorched bark, filling the air with the acrid smell of ozone. Xena doesn’t flinch. Her eyes are like two chips of ice, pinning Ares with their fury.

"What is it with her? I have offered you everything you could ever want and still you choose her," Ares shouts. "Well, I’ve had it, Xena. I am sick and tired of chasing after you like a lovestruck schoolboy. This god won’t be available for you to kick around anymore."

Sometimes I feel I’ve got to run away.

I’ve got to get away from the pain you drive into the heart of me.

The love we share seems to go nowhere

And I’ve lost my light, for I toss and turn. I can’t sleep at night.

Once I ran to you, now I run from you.

This tainted love you’ve given.

I give you all a boy could give you

Take my tears and that’s not nearly all

Tainted love. Tainted love

Don’t touch me please. I cannot stand the way you tease.

I love you, though you hurt me so.

Now I’m gonna pack my things and go.

Tainted love. Tainted love.

As the last notes fade from the air, Ares shoots his tormentor a last angry look and vanishes in a burst of light, leaving Xena shaking her head in bemusement. It actually seems as if he’s really hurt by my rejection, she thinks briefly. She shrugs that thought off and focuses her attention on something more important, making things right between her and Gabrielle. Lost in thought, her head swirling as she tries to figure out how to make things up to her friend, Xena heads back to town.

Asking around, the warrior learns that Gabrielle has taken a room in a small inn on the outskirts of the city. She heads up the dark, narrow stairway and knocks on the door to the bard’s room. She is met with silence.

"Gabrielle, open the door. Please," Xena pleads. "Look, whatever you saw. It’s not what you think. I can explain."

After a long pause, the bard’s barely audible voice reaches the warrior’s sharp ears.

"Go away, Xena. I don’t want to hear your excuses."

Another lengthy silence follows, and Xena soon realizes that her friend isn’t going to let her in. At least not tonight. Defeated, the dejected warrior slinks back out into the night and ducks into the stables next to the inn. She slumps wearily in a pile of hay, ignoring the indignant looks from the horses quartered within the structure.

"You never should have walked out on her, you idiot," she admonishes herself sadly. "I can fix this, Gabrielle. I know I can. Don’t give up on me yet," she whispers as a soft refrain echoes through her head.

Come to me now. Lay your hands over me.

Even if it’s a lie. Say it will be allright. And I will believe

Broken in two. I know you’re on to me.

That I only come home when I’m so all alone. But I do believe

That not everything is gonna be the way you think it ought to be

It seems like every time I try to make it right, it all comes down on me

Please say honestly you won’t give up on me and I shall believe

Open the door. And show me your face tonight.

I know it’s true. No one heals me like you. And you hold the key.

Never again. Would I turn away from you

I’m so heavy tonight but your love is allright. And I do believe

That not everything is gonna be the way you think it ought to be

It seems like every time I try to make it right, it all comes down on me

Please say honestly you won’t give up on me and I shall believe

A slow sigh escapes her lips as Xena pulls her legs up and rests her chin on her knees, wondering what to do next. Unknown to her, Gabrielle has been outside the stable door, listening. The bard pauses with her hand on the door, trying to decide whether or not to go in. Most of her desperately wants to go in and trust in whatever Xena tells her, but the image of her soulmate kissing Ares is still vividly burned in her mind. How many times now has she had to stand by and watch silently while Xena and Ares do their little dance. Deep down, Gabrielle knows that Xena has no true feelings for the god, but still a small part of her wondered if she could completely trust the warrior’s words. She recalls Aphrodite’s earlier words.

"She said I already had Xena’s heart," Gabrielle muses. "If that’s true, then why was she with Ares? Maybe she’s afraid of letting her feelings show. Maybe that’s why she was running away. Doesn’t she know by now that I’ll follow her anywhere? Can’t she see that I love her?"

Her resolve crumbling, the frustrated bard returns to her room, leaving Xena alone with her misery. The warrior idly plays with a stalk of hay, wondering for the hundredth time that evening if she should just leave for good.

"Don’t you dare!"

Xena looks up, a mixture of surprise and annoyance on her face as Aphrodite appears in the stables. The goddess wrinkles her nose in distaste at the strong smell of the horses.

"Ick. Couldn’t you find someplace less smelly to hole up in?" she asks the warrior.

Xena just shrugs and raises an eyebrow at the love goddess expectantly.

"Boy, you really made a mess this time, didn’t you?" Aphrodite shakes her head.

"It wasn’t my fault. Ares. . ." Xena protests.

"Yeah, yeah, I know. Same old story. Little bro can’t keep his hands off other people’s toys. That’s not the point, though. The real question is, what are you going to do about it?"

"I don’t know what to do. Look, I’d never usually ask advice from the gods. . ." Xena trails off, leaving the plea for help unspoken.

"Xena, sweetie, it’s really very simple. Listen."

Xena watches in amazement as Aphrodite launches into a quick dance number.