Disclaimers: All characters referenced in this story are mine and mine alone. Any similarities between them and anyone else living, dead, or fictional, is purely accidental/coincidental. Basically, hands off without my permission-pretty please.
If you like them, feel free to let me know about it at Jeaninehemail-public@yahoo.com if you don’t, please don’t be mean.
Warnings: This story will depict relationships between women. If that bothers you, I’m sorry for your narrow-minded approach but please leave now and come back when you come out. If it is illegal for you to view this type of story due to age or location then please come back when you age or move. There will at times be somewhat graphic descriptions of medical events, nothing too graphic but not for those who faint at the mention of an IV. With that said, I hope you enjoy!
I’d like to thank Vic and Trish, the two people that encouraged me to put this out to let others decide its fate.
Also, for Sue, the reason I want to do my best is to be the woman you deserve-I’m always on call for you!
Chapter Two
Waiting around the station for a call can be relaxing, fun, or boring. Today was boring and I wasn’t having much success taking a nap. I had already worked out in the station’s gym, cleaned my gear, and washed the rig. After surfing through all the TV channels twice, I decided to call Cait and see how she was doing. The problem I had was that Pauly was my partner, and I wanted to make the call without her being in the same room. I finally decided to walk outside with my cell phone and gave her a call at home.
“Hey Donny, how’s your shift?”
The joys of caller ID means you can’t surprise anyone anymore. “It’s a slow day and I was thinking about you. I just wanted to see how you’re feeling.”
“I’m good. I shook the cold a few days ago. It must have been your soup, thanks again for taking care of me.”
Now I was starting to blush a bit as I felt my pulse rate speed up. “So, since you’re better and off from work, do you want to pay up on that rain check you owe me? I was thinking we could have dinner and maybe check out a movie or something. You in?” I could feel my heart hammering in my chest. I was nervous about her answer and I couldn’t seem to calm down.
“Sure, sounds good! Do you want me to meet you someplace or will we ride together?” she asked.
“I think I’ll just pick you up. I’ll shower and change here, then come get you when we go off shift. It’s only another hour at most unless the other crew gets tapped. Your choice of movie tonight, so you can figure it out in the meantime.”
She chuckled before answering, “You might be sorry you said that since there’s a new foreign film at the Art Café!” She paused a beat before finishing her thought, “No worries, I wouldn’t put you through it. I know how you feel about reading movies.”
Boy, was she in for a shock! If this didn’t tell her, I wanted more than friendship I might actually have to say something sometime. “Actually, I knew about it and was going to suggest it since I know you like those movies. I’m trying to expand my horizons. Let’s check it out tonight. You find out the times and I’ll pick dinner based on that when I pick you up, okay?” She sounded surprised but she gave me an affirmative and we hung up.
I knew I had a silly grin on my face but I couldn’t help it. I was feeling good about things and I even thought about trying to hold her hand during the movie to state my interest in her. Of course, having just made plans, the house tones went off. I grabbed a pen and my notepad and copied down the address, time of dispatch and nature of call as I walked to the rig. Then I realized, we weren’t the crew dispatched! Of course, this meant we were next up if the other crew needed backup or a second call came in, so I paced and studiously avoided looking at the clock until I heard the boisterous sounds of our relief coming in the door. I tossed the keys to one of the guys coming in, gave him a rundown of the other crew’s status, and ran upstairs to the showers and bunkroom.
Since this was a fire station with both genders represented, the old bunkrooms had been divided and a second shower room installed. I grabbed my shower stuff from my locker and headed for the showers. Pauly came up just as I was starting to strip down and opened her locker.
“Hey, where are you going tonight? You’re taking a shower? Got a date?” she smirked as she asked her questions.
“Um, not really, I just thought I’d take a quick shower since I won’t have time to stop at home.” I avoided all mention of a movie as that could lead to questions about which movie. Everyone knew that I didn’t go for subtitled movies and I didn’t want her to suspect anything. I mean, this was her sister I was thinking about dating. She seemed cool about her sister being a lesbian but I still wasn’t sure what side of the fence Pauly was on. I also would understand if she weren’t thrilled about me dating her sister, not that this was a date, since she hadn’t seen me in a relationship and I might think I was just trying to score with her sister. As if I would wreck a friendship, possibly two, for a piece of ass.
I knew I could go to a bar and pick someone up for a quick physiological release of sexual tension. I’d partaken a few times since Karen had left me but I found it empty and unsatisfying. I knew I wasn’t going to find a life mate in a bar, so why bother with the pretense? But I digress …
Pauly just looked at me, then shrugged her shoulder and told me to have fun. I almost ran into the shower and dove into my clothes when I was done. I grabbed my gear and headed for my truck before anyone could ask me to hang out. I was on a mission!
#
By the time I got to Cait’s house, I had convinced myself that tonight was the night to be bold and let her know I was interested in more than friendship. That is, it was the night if I didn’t chicken out or make a complete fool of myself first. I took a deep breath and went to the door, which opened before I got to it. Cait stood in the doorway looking gorgeous in black slacks and a dark blue button down shirt worn open over a white tank top. Damn! I could feel the heat rising in me as I stared at her. For some reason my mouth went dry and it took me a minute to speak. Caty gave me a smile and motioned me inside.
I finally managed a hello to her as I stepped inside, being careful not to brush against her as I entered. She said she was almost ready so I went to the kitchen to get a glass of water while I waited. I didn’t have a long wait, as soon as she slipped on her shoes; she was ready. Caty told me we had about two hours before the movie, which fit my plans for dinner perfectly.
“Are you going to tell me where we’re going or am I supposed to guess?” asked Caty. She looked over at me her hazel eyes curious but I thought that there was a glimmer of something else there, and then it vanished.
I decided I must have been seeing a reflection of light. I shook it off and answered her, “You get to find out when we get there, but I promise you’ll like it.” I knew she would too; her favorite Hibachi style place was about a ten-minute walk from the movie theater we would be going to later so it made it a perfect choice. We had plenty of time to enjoy the show the chef’s put on as they cooked the food on the tabletop grill in front of us.
We talked about daily life stuff as I drove and found parking. I purposely parked closer to the movie than the restaurant. That way it was easier later but also, she wouldn’t know where we were going right away. I love surprising people and I hoped she would reward me with that heart-stopping smile again. As we walked, she kept bumping into me with her arm but I didn’t mind the contact at all. She grinned delightedly when she realized where we were going and gave a little should of happiness.
“Donny, you are so awesome! I love this place so much! You really are being accommodating today, aren’t you? A film with subtitles and my favorite restaurant? You’re so sweet, thank you.” She reached over and gave me a quick hug. I almost fainted from the jolt I felt as we touched. That was something new. I had felt sparks before, but this was like a lightening strike. She seemed to pause a moment and I wondered if she felt it too, but when she pulled away her face was composed.
“Let’s go in and get seated. We have plenty of time before the movie starts and I’m hungry.” I was trying to behave normally but for some reason I was feeling sparks flying. I didn’t know how to handle it, I was too afraid to get hurt again. The pain would be immense if Cait rejected me and I wouldn’t be able to talk about it with my friends at work, since her sister was in the same station as me.
“Donny, what are you thinking of having? Everything looks great. Did you want to share a sushi appetizer with me?” We were sitting at the table as a larger group was seated with us to complete the eight-person table. I had my menu in front of me but I was too busy thinking to make up my mind.
“Sure, whatever you want is fine with me. I think I’ll just have the steak and chicken combo. I can never make up my mind so I get both.” I refocused on the woman sitting next to me and risked a look into her hazel eyes. They danced with light and humor as she watched me.
“Why don’t we get the sampler sushi appetizer. It has two pieces each of three different rolls. That way we don’t have to decide on just one kind. I think I’ll have the steak and chicken too and keep choices to a minimum tonight.”
She has always understood that as a medic I have to make hundreds of decisions a day that can affect the life and safety of my crew, my patients, and myself. Outside of work, I try to give myself a break and just let things happen. Caty has said that she doesn’t have the same problem since they follow a cue card system at dispatch, but I think they still have a lot on their hands every shift.
After our drinks arrived and we placed our orders, and I started to feel awkward. I think I was seeing this a date but it was supposed to be two friends going out to dinner and a movie. What the hell was I thinking? How did I allow myself to get trapped in this quasi-date hell? These were the questions running through my mind when Cait surprised the hell out of me.
I felt a warm hand reach over and grip mine lightly in my lap. I looked up at her with shock and more than a little fear. Cait looked a little surprised at herself but she didn’t flinch as I looked at her.
She just smiled at me shyly and said softly, “I’ve been trying to get your attention for a while now. I finally decided I have to be bold since you weren’t getting the hint.” She paused, then took a deep breath. “I like you Chloe, as more than just a friend. I think you like me too. Am I right?” She gave me a shy smile and waited for me to say something.
I was dumbfounded! Caitlin Connor was holding my hand and announced that she liked me! I just sat there like an idiot trying to get the words to form and I just stuttered like a rookie at his or her first real fire scene.
“You, I mean, I … oh, what I’m trying to say is—“ I couldn’t make the words form properly. Damn it Donny, get your head out of your ass! I finally managed a coherent sentence, as her hazel eyes grew dark with concern. “I’m so glad Caty, I was too scared to tell you, but I’ve liked you for so long now.” It finally burst forth in a rush, much like the first blast from a hose before the nozzle has been adjusted properly.
A look of relief came over her face and she tightened her hand around mine briefly. I sat there grinning like a fool and not really knowing what to do next since we were at a table with six strangers in a crowded restaurant. I could hardly grasp the knowledge that we were holding hands or that Caty actually had feelings beyond friendship for me and yet here we were.
Just then, our appetizer arrived and we focused on the food, releasing our hands way too soon for my liking, however, there was the promise of more to come.
#
Dinner flew past in a blur of showmanship by the chef and hurried eating before I grabbed the check and we left. Once outside I felt awkward again, even more afraid to hold her hand now that I knew she wanted me to do so. I just stood there not knowing what to do and apparently, I looked as awkward as I felt because Caty moved closer to me. She guided me to one side of the doorway. Before she looked at me with eyes that I wanted to lose myself in, yet was almost afraid to meet for some reason.
“Donny, its okay, I know I kind of sprang it on you. I took a chance that you felt the same way because you agreed to the movie tonight. When you chose one of my favorite restaurants for dinner, I felt as if you were trying to tell me something and I was hoping this was it.” She paused, looking nervous suddenly. “You said you felt the same way when I told you but now you’re nervous. How can I help? Should we skip the movie and go to my place to talk about things?”
Sweet Goddess, I had no idea what to do or how to react. My mind was frozen in shock but at the same time a million things spun out of control in my head. What was she looking for? Was this meant to be a friends with benefits thing or did she want a real long-term relationship? How do I move past this lump of ice in my gut telling me to run away so I can’t get hurt again? All of that went through my mind quickly before I gather myself again. I took in a deep breath and calmed my mind before finally opening my mouth to answer her.
“I promised you a movie to read tonight and I meant it. I do think we should talk though. Can I rain check you on the movie? I promise to come see it with you later this week or next week if you want before it closes.”
I really did want to talk to her not just ditch the movie. The way I see things, and always have, is that you have to try to take on some of the interests of the person you are with or you have nothing to share and you aren’t growing. So, while I don’t understand the appeal of those movies, I figured it was worth it to spend the time with Cait.
Caty smiled gently and took my hand in her hand. “I appreciate your willingness to go with me, but I really think a private talk is more in order too. If you feel more comfortable we can go to your place.”
“No, its fine, we can go to your place. Thanks Cait.” I smiled gratefully and starting walking with her towards the Rav-4. It was a quiet drive back to her place, I had some background music on, and we both pretended to listen to it as we drove. We held hands the whole way, sending tingling sparks up my arm and straight to the nervous flutter building in my stomach.
#
We settled on her couch with hot tea and theoretically ready to talk. I say theoretically as neither one of us made a move to actually say anything, and we both sat like prim schoolgirls on the edge of the couch, holding our tea. I nervously set my mug down on her coffee table and turned towards her. My heart pounded as I reached out for her hand, which she willingly gave me after putting down her own mug. We turned to face each other and finally made eye contact. Her hazel eyes looked into my green ones and we connected. I felt it and I knew she felt it too. Not knowing how else to proceed I decided to just start talking. I can do this, I reasoned, this is one of my closest friends. There is no reason I can’t talk to her now!
“Caty, I’m not sure what to do about this. I’ve liked you for a long time now but you know my history with Karen. I’ve been too afraid to tell you because with you, I would get serious and I’m not sure I can handle anyone else breaking my heart again.”
I paused to gather my thoughts and take a sip of my tea before I continued. She must have sensed I wasn’t done as she waiting for me to go on.
“I’m scared of this Caty, I don’t want to lose you as a friend, I don’t want this to affect things with your sister at work, or between the two of you. I don’t want to get hurt again and I don’t want to hurt you if I can’t be what you want or need.”
“Donny, instead of telling me what you don’t want, why don’t you tell me what you do want. You might be surprised by it but I am willing to bet that we want a lot of the same things. In fact, I know you and I know that we do. Let me prove it to you, all right?”
I hesitated for a few seconds before I answered her. I was petrified as I realized that this woman could totally destroy me if I let her any further inside of me. I also recognized that my life would be so very empty without letting her in to try. “Sure, prove away.”
“We both want a long term relationship with a woman who can be our best friend and lover for life. We both want to continue in jobs that allow us to help others in times of urgent need. We both want stable and happy homes where friends and family are welcomed in with no questions asked. How am I doing so far?”
I looked for any signs in her face that this was a cosmic joke but found none. Of course, I wanted those things, didn’t everyone? I said as much to her and waited for her response.
“Yeah, most people want those things, but you and I share more than just that stuff. We both dream of camping all over the country, we both love dogs, cooking, and being cozy for a quiet night at home. We also both enjoy going out with a group and being rowdy, kicking back and having fun. And right now, I want, more than anything else, to kiss you like you’ve never been kissed before.”
With that, she leaned over and gently kissed my lips, slowly sliding her tongue over my lips before going inside to tangle with my tongue. Her hands moved so that one was tangled in my hair and the other held me closely around my waist. All I could feel was warmth and electricity coursing through my system as we continued to kiss. When we finally broke contact Caitlin looked at me with a twinkle in her eyes and asked, “Any more complaints or reasons why we shouldn’t try to find happiness together?”
I moaned and leaned in again for another kiss. We made out; slowly starting to move our hands over each other’s clothing, exploring territory that I had never believed could be mine. When Caty started to move her hands under my shirt, I stopped and sat up.
“Wait Cait, I can’t do this,” I said. “It’s moving too fast for me. I thought we were going out as friends tonight and found out that you want to date me.” I looked over at her carefully, “You do want to date right? Not just sleep together? ‘Cause I’m so not into friends with benefits.” Fear grabbed a hold of my heart for a moment as I waited for her to answer.
“Of course not! I mean, yes I want to date you, not just sleep with you! C’mon, you know me better than that. I’ve never been a player. And we can wait as long as you need to wait before we sleep together, it isn’t what I’m after.” She chuckled and flashed a grin at me, “well, not all that I’m after at least.”
With that, I relaxed a bit and moved my body so that I was leaning against her on the couch with her right arm around me and I held her left hand with my left hand. I felt her relax against me and couldn’t help but notice how exactly right this felt. We fit so well together, we were almost the same height, she claimed to be an inch taller but I think she was counting her boots. I couldn’t help but let myself believe that this could be a possibility. We might actually fit together for real. Of course, being me, I had to ask another question.
“What about your sister, what are we gonna tell her? I mean, I have to work with her so I can’t deny it, besides she’s bound to find out sooner or later.” I was aware that dating one of our own’s family members was almost as risky as dating one of our own.
“Don’t worry about her, I’ll tell her the next time I talk to her. I think she’s going to be fine once she thinks it over. At first she might be pissed off though.”
CRAP! Just what I didn’t need, to have one of our medics upset with me. “How mad at me will she be? Any idea?”
“She’s not going to be mad at you Donny, she’s going to be pissed as hell at me! She’s been warning me off you for months and I go off and do what I wanted to do after all. I know some of it is that she looks up to you, but she had a major crush on you when she started at the firehouse and she’s bound to have some of that pop up and cause a little jealousy.”
Now my head was spinning way too quickly. A crush on me? Pauly Connor had a crush on me? Damn, looked like there was more going on than I thought and I wasn’t sure what to do about it.
“I didn’t realize she was a lesbian Caty, or that she had a crush on me. What should I do about it?”
Caty shook her head and held me a little tighter for a second. “No, she’s not a lesbian, she’s bisexual. She’s had boyfriends and girlfriends since she started dating. She’s simply attracted to the person and not the gender. I think if I talk to her, she’ll be fine once that initial flare up passes. When do you work with her next?”
I reviewed the roster in my head before I replied, “Tomorrow and then not for about a week. How am I going to work all shift with her tomorrow? Damn, this is going to be difficult isn’t it?”
Caty gave me her best smile, leaned over and kissed the top of my head before answering, “Yeah, but I think it’s going to be worth it in the end.”