Halloween Lessons

by

Kim Pritekel

(Drop me a line at XenaNut@hotmail.com or find me on Facebook, and let me know what you thought!)

1.

            “Alex!” Michelle Kasey called out, never taking her eyes off the clean laundry she was folding from the large pile dropped onto the couch. When the thirty-eight year old mother of two didn’t hear anything, she glanced up at the ceiling above her as though that would give her a little window into her son’s waking status. “Damn it, Alex,” she muttered, tossing down the t-shirt she’d been folding onto the pile.

She made her way to the stairs, listening the entire time. This was the first school year that her fifteen year old wanted to get himself up using an alarm on his phone. This was great, this was wonderful, but half the time he forgot to set it.

Or, as in this case, he’d set it and it had gone off, but he was sleeping right through it, as she could hear it blasting through the solid wood door when she rounded the top of the stairs and headed down the hall to his bedroom.

Annoyed, Michelle tucked shoulder length blonde strands behind her ear as she reached her son’s closed bedroom door. Turning the knob, she pushed it open and saw that, sure enough, her oldest was still sound asleep. Deciding on the best way to wake him, she opted for the more direct approach. Having to leave early today, she had no time – nor was in the mood – to be the playful mom this morning.

“Alex!” She knocked loudly on the open door she stood next to, making an awful racket.

“What!” He shot up, blue eyes – the same color as his mother’s – wide and dark hair a mass of wild, sleep mussed waves around his head. He looked from her to his phone on the bedside table as his world was suddenly a cacophony of noise.

Michelle looked down when she felt a warm touch on her leg. Instantly, she smiled at the protruding lip she saw on her very young daughter’s face. “Good morning, my sleepy girl,” she said, reaching down and picking up her five-year-old, Meghan.

“Loud.” The little one said, head full of golden curls resting against her mother’s shoulder.

Michelle looked to her son with a quirked brow. He looked contrite and looked away, muttering an apology as he reached for his phone to turn off the alarm

“You need to get up, son,” she said to him, tone softer than her look had been. “Remember, I’m taking you to school today and we need to leave early because I’m supposed to go in and talk to your teacher.”

He flopped back down onto his back and groaned. “Right,” he muttered. Blowing out a breath, he nodded. “Okay. I’m up.” He lifted his head and looked at her when she didn’t leave his room. With an annoyed growl, he sat up and flung the covers off his body. “Okay, okay.”

“See you downstairs,” she said, knowing full well that he’d fall back asleep if she let him continue laying there, all warm and snuggly.

Closing his door to give him privacy, Michelle headed to the bedroom Meghan slept in with her ‘big girl bed’, though half the time she ended up in bed with Michelle. “Let’s get you ready for school sweetheart, okay?”

As she went into mom-mode, which was essentially tunnel vision to get what needed to be done, Michelle studied her little girl. Her children were ten years apart, her baby, Meghan, a complete shock. It was ironic to her, the two different phases of life both Alex and Meghan had showed up in.

Alex had been conceived pretty much on the honeymoon or soon thereafter. Not a time in her life she liked to think about, so filled with uncertainty and dread. Unfortunately, all that she’d worried about in the marriage to Gavin Kasey had come to pass.

They’d had far more downs than ups, but during one such time where she and Gavin had tried to work it out – again - Meghan had come along. She wouldn’t change having her daughter for all the money in the world, but never did she see herself as a woman pushing forty with a kindergartner.

But then, never had she saw herself being in the middle of a contentious divorce as a woman pushing forty, either. I do until death do we part, just as her upbringing and vows had decreed. Clearly, not so much. And the worst part? She was relieved. The day she’d packed up her kids and left Gavin had been the hardest yet best day of her life.

That, however hadn’t been in the handbook of Cliff’s Laws that her father had made her memorize from birth. So, despite her relief, she was dealing with the guilt of disappointing her father, even though she knew damn well she was a grown woman and had done the right thing for her children. And herself.

“Mommy?”

“Yes, baby?” she asked, her daughter’s sweet little voice pulling her out of her musings as she got her dressed.

“Is Daddy coming to Grandma and Grandpa’s with us tomorrow?”

Michelle met the blue gaze before her and smiled as she shook her head. “No, sweetheart. Daddy will be at his house.” Meghan said nothing more, simply nodded. “Do you want him there, Meghan?”

Michelle was more than surprised when she got a vigorous shake of the little one’s head, blonde curls bouncing adorably with the gesture in the negative. In some ways, she supposed, she shouldn’t be surprised. Gavin hadn’t been around a whole lot in his daughter’s life. Meghan was by far closer to her mother and brother than her father.

As much as it made her sad, Michelle was glad. Yes, certainly for her own selfish and petty reasons, as she didn’t feel Gavin deserved their daughter, but also for Meghan’s sake. This was hard enough for the five-year-old to wrap her little mind around.

As bad as things had been for a large portion of Meghan’s life, it was what she knew. The baby had to become used to the loud ranting when Gavin was home. The house had become an all-out battleground by the end, loud, angry words, insults and accusations the weapons of choice.  

Michelle, what amounted to a single mom now as the divorce wasn’t finalized yet, was doing her damndest to make things as normal and positive as she could. Working a full-time job, it wasn’t always easy, but she was doing her best.

Someday, she thought as she finished with Mehgan’s little t-shirt, she’d make sure these kids had everything they could possibly need, including the love they deserved from their parents. It may just be her, and she was fine with that. Even without that son of a bitch in the house, it was a hell of a lot easier to be the mother they needed.

So many years of constant fighting and Gavin’s constant mind games, it had worn her down to the point where she was so often on autopilot. Her kids never went without, but she knew she’d closed herself off in ways that she was ashamed of, even from them.

Never, ever again.

***

            Meghan escorted to her classroom with tons of hugs and noisy kisses to make her giggle, Michelle was back in the car driving she and Alex to the high school. It was his first year and it wasn’t starting off well.

Glancing over at him sitting in the passenger seat, she saw that he was staring out his window. She couldn’t believe how big he was getting. He’d outgrown his shoes twice just over the summer and his height was beginning to pick up.

She smiled at that. Poor kid was all gangly legs and arms with huge feet. He already had a couple inches on her, and that she wasn’t thrilled about. It would seem he’d be getting his father’s height.

His features were beginning to square up, his jaw strong and proud like his dad’s and his voice beginning to take a dive. Some days he sounded like her little boy but then others it was the prelude of the young man he was becoming. She hated it! Her first born and the only good thing to come of her early years married to his father.

Turning her focus back to the road, she let out a quiet sigh.

The big brick building came into view, scores of kids and cars prowling the campus. A line of yellow school buses were lined up in the circular drive out front, kids exiting like good little drones heading to their one duty as a child – learn and grow.

Michelle smiled as she watched them. She’d loved school and so badly had wanted to go to college after. It wasn’t to be as her father wouldn’t have it. He had other, antiquated plans for his one and only daughter, and dutifully she’d filled the role he’d created for her.

The one good thing Gavin had given her – other than her children – was he’d allowed her to go to trade school. Granted, he’d let her go so she could make more money to help fund the lavish lifestyle he wanted, but she didn’t care about the why. She had a good job now as a dental hygienist, working for Dr. Marion Bethel for the last eleven years.

It had helped their family to have a good life with Gavin’s income, yes, but now at least she could support herself and her kids with it, too. They’d had to downsize from the big house to the townhouse, thus leaving the neighborhood the kids were used to. That, of course, meant leaving their friends and starting in a new school district.

It also meant birthday and Christmas gifts would have to now fit into a budget, but they’d make it. She knew Alex was angry about leaving his friends and pretty much just angry about the entire situation. But, she hoped in time he’d see how much better off they were.

Pushing all of that out of her mind as she got parked in the visitor parking lot, she looked to her son. “Ready?”

He said nothing, simply nodded and climbed out of the SUV before dragging his heavy backpack out with him and slamming the door. Michelle pressed the button on her key fob to lock the Explorer and the two walked together towards the building. She could tell Alex was nervous, certainly pensive.

“Is there something I need to know before I talk to her?” Michelle asked, giving him one last opportunity to come clean if he needed to.

Again, he said nothing, simply shook his head.

Once inside the building, she gave him a quick hug, not wanting to traumatize him too badly with motherly affection in front of the other kids, and headed off in the direction he’d told her to go to find his history teacher.

A woman who was clearly not a teenager and who was dressed in medical scrubs certainly got quite a few confused looks. She smiled at those who looked at her and kept going. It was so strange to be totally inundated with a mass of hormonal humanity. It was a lot to deal with just her own child let alone hundreds of them. The noise was immense: kids talking, laughing, yelling, the slam of locker doors or loud thud of books or heavy items being dropped at the bottom of lockers.

Graduating high school twenty years ago, she wondered how on earth she’d survived the chaos for four years. And, as she reached the classroom she had been headed for, she wondered how teachers and faculty did it every single day.

Pulling open the classroom door, she stepped inside the room, the door pulled closed behind her. Immediately, the chaos just outside was dampened by the thick wood  door with glass panel, inlaid metal mesh crisscrossed inside the pane. As expected, neat rows of metal desks with wood desktops were in straight lines with metal and wood chairs tucked up against them.

The polished linoleum of the floor reflected the train of long, halogen lights running along the ceiling. Two large chalkboards took up the length of wall at the front, both clean and fresh for a new day of instructions to be written upon them. The wood teachers desk was placed front and center of the room, and a woman sat behind it, dark head bent over whatever she was writing.

“Give me one sec,” the woman, assumedly Alex’s teacher, murmured.

Michelle said nothing, giving the other woman the requested time. She continued to look around, noting posters all over the painted cinderblock walls. All had a place of historical significance, such as the pyramids of Egypt or Stonehenge and even the Eiffel Tower of Paris, as well as a historical fact about what was pictured.

“My apologies.”

Michelle turned her attention back to the seated woman, who was now looking up at her with a welcoming smile. Taken completely by surprise, Michelle’s eyes widened when she looked into the face of the woman, especially her eyes. She’d never forget those eyes.

She literally had to look away for a moment as a whole lot of things ran through her, including a whole lot of shy embarrassment. Blowing out a very quiet breath, she forced herself to focus. Maybe it wasn’t the same person. There was no way in hell it could be the same person. Right?

Clearing her throat, she put a smile on her lips and turned back to the woman who was pushing to her feet. Dressed professionally, her hair was very dark, near black, and cut in a short, sporty style that was very cute and flattering.

Her face was beautiful, just as Michelle remembered it. But again, those damn eyes. They were gray and just as mesmerizing now as they’d been that night. And – to her relief? – there seemed to be absolutely no recognition in them. But then, why would there be?

Seventeen years was a very long time, especially at that jumping off point from young adult into the shark-infested waters of the full-on responsibilities of adulthood. And also, hadn’t it just been any ordinary night for the other woman? It had only been life-changing for Michelle.

“I’m Michelle,” she finally managed. “Alex Kasey’s mom.”

“Mrs. Kasey,” the woman said, extending her hand. “Cori Brannon. Thank you so much for coming.”

Michelle took it, accepting the firm shake. “Of course. Anything for my kids.”

The two shared a smile before the teacher released Michelle’s hand and walked around the desk, indicating two in the front rows of student’s desks. They got seated, Michelle amused as she placed her hands briefly on the desktop she sat behind.

“I can almost feel the teenage angst,” she said with a nervous little smile as she patted her hands on the scarred wood top.

The teacher chuckled. “You’re not far off.” She sat sideways in the chair to face Michelle, who mirrored her position. “I called you in today, Mrs. Kasey, because I’m a little concerned about Alex. We’re only six weeks into the semester and his grades are already slipping and his behavior has taken a drastic one eighty.” Those gray eyes were filled with concern. “I wanted to talk to you about this now before he got himself into real trouble or before it was too late to bring his grades up.”

Letting out a heavy sigh, Michelle brought her hand up to run down the length of her ponytail in a nervous gesture. “I’ve noticed it at home, too,” she said quietly.

“So,” the teacher continued gently, “this isn’t just an issue at school, then? Another student picking on him, romantic issues, all that?”

Shaking her head, Michelle met the teacher’s gaze again. “His father and I are going through a pretty nasty divorce right now,” she explained, surprised she’d shared that much. “The kids and I had to move over the summer and it’s been really hard on them. Especially Alex. New house, new neighborhood, new school district.”

“Oh man,” the teacher said, shaking her head. “I’m so sorry. This is my eighteenth year teaching, and I’ve seen it so many times.”

Nodding, Michelle said, “I’m sure you have. It’s not easy.”

“No, it’s not. Listen,” she said, a warm but brief touch to Michelle’s arm. “Alex is a really good kid, which was why I called you in here. It seemed pretty clear he was dealing with something which was causing him to act out. If he can get in the assignments he’s missing, I’m willing to give him a little bit of a break. Yes,” she added, “I’ll have to knock off some points for late work, but he can get caught up.”

Michelle stared at her. “Missing assignments? He hasn’t missed any school, Mrs. Brannon.”

“Miss,” the teacher corrected with a smile. “And,” she added, “attendance doesn’t always equate to assignments.” She pushed to her feet and walked to the teacher’s desk again, Michelle following. “I printed out all the assignments thus far for the semester,” she explained, holding out the page that she’d been writing on when Michelle arrived. “Next to those he’s missing, I jotted down the date that he must have them turned in by in order to get any credit for them. After that,” she said, shaking her head, “I just can’t take them, Mrs. Kasey.”

“No,” Michelle said, taking the sheet and scanning it. “I completely understand.” Anger filled her, though she wasn’t sure if it was more at her son or herself. Meeting the teacher’s gaze, she said, “I promise you, Miss Brannon, things will change with Alex.” She held up the page for emphasis. “This will not happen again.” She forced herself to push the anger down, as it wasn’t this woman’s fault. “I can’t thank you enough for taking the time to talk to me,” she said, the sincerity of her words in her tone.

Smiling, Miss Brannon retorted with, “I can’t thank you enough for taking the time to come in and talk to me.”

Laughing, Michelle nodded. “Touche.” Together they walked to the closed door of the classroom, the bell for first period ringing to alert the kids they had three minutes to get to class. “You have my email, Miss Brannon,” she said at the door. “I’m certainly not asking you to spy on my son, lord knows you have a million other things to do, but if you see this nonsense happening again, please don’t hesitate to let me know.”

“Thank you, Mrs. Kasey,” the teacher said with a winning smile, which nearly took Michelle’s breath away. “Parents like you are much appreciated.”

Michelle raised the page she’d been given. “Busy weekend ahead.” She returned the smile. “Have a nice day, Miss. Brannon,” she said, pulling the door open.

“You, as well.”

Michelle just barely got out into the hall and out of the way before she was nearly run over by a swarm of kids heading into the classroom she’d just vacated. She leaned back against the wall a couple feet away as she needed a moment.

She knew it was her, absolutely knew it was. Laughing, she shook her head. “What are the fucking odds?” she whispered, then pushed off the wall to make her way out of the building so she could get to work.

 

2.

            “Hey, Mom,” Michelle said, stepping into the house with little Meghan’s hand tucked into hers.

“Hello!” the older woman exclaimed, hurrying to the front door from the kitchen. She gave her daughter a quick hug before turning to her granddaughter, whom she adored.

Michelle had many issues with her mother growing up, largely that Audrey would never stand up for her daughter against a domineering husband to her and father to Michelle. But, the older woman seemed to be seeing the world differently since her granddaughter was born.

Michelle had seen a strength come out in her mother that, though she’d do anything to have had that to protect her as a child, she was grateful to see it now with Meghan. Give Meghan another generation of support.

“How’s my baby girl?” Audrey asked the little one in her arms. It was easy to see grandmother and granddaughter shared a very special bond.

“Good!” Meghan’s little grin made both women’s hearts melt.

“Where’s my boy?” Cliff boomed, stepping into the room from the hallway that led to the bedrooms.

Michelle saw Meghan flinch at the loud, boisterous voice. She brought a hand up and pushed some gold curls back from her daughter’s face to let her know she was there. She knew it took the little one back to her father’s loud way, which honestly drove them all crazy. As Gavin had gotten older, Michelle had seen more and more of her father in him and understood just why Gavin had been chosen for her.

“He’s at home,” Michelle explained. “He had assignments to makeup that he missed.”

He looked at her, clearly confused. “Why?”

She blinked at him. “What do you mean, ‘why’?” she asked.

Heavy brows drew. “Why is he working on homework?” Cliff asked. “It’s Saturday and he should be with his granddad or his father.”

Counting to three in her mind, Michelle began again. “One of his teachers called me in to tell me he hasn’t been turning in his work, Dad. He’s grounded this weekend and will be until he gets the assignments done.”

He waved her words away. “Bullshit. He’s a boy, Michelle.”

“Cliff!” Audrey hissed, indicating the little one she held who was listening to their every word.

Not even bothering to look contrite, he turned back to his daughter. “He’s a boy,” he said again. “That’s his job.” He grinned, no doubt a grin that an unsuspecting woman would find charming but Michelle knew better. That was his smile reserved for women, yes, but it was that maddening condescension she knew all too well.

Turning to her mother, Michelle said softly, “Mom, would you take Meghan into the kitchen and get started on making cookies? I’ll be right there.”

Michelle gave her daughter a kiss to her head before Audrey turned and carried her away after the two women shared a look. It was a look they’d shared more and more over the past year when it became very clear Michelle was fed up with bullshit from every quarter, including from her father.

From her mother, it was a look of understanding. From Michelle, it was a look of, I’m about to go apeshit, so you may want to leave.

Turning to him she said, “No, Dad, it’s not what boys do. Being an irresponsible asshole is not what boys do. Doing whatever and not being held accountable is not what boys do. My job,” she added, hand on her chest, “as his mother is to teach him responsibility and hold him accountable when he screws up. I am not going to loose him on some unsuspecting young woman to try her damndest to teach him how to be a decent human being like I was forced to do with Gavin.” Her eyes were blue fire as they bored into his.

She could tell he wanted to unleash, to absolutely tell her just exactly how it was in Cliff’s world, therefore her world, too as he put her in her place, but amazingly, he refrained. Jaw muscles working, he ran a hand over short salt-and-pepper hair before he headed out the front door, letting it slam behind him.

As Michelle had begun to speak up for herself more and more with him and against his sexist views and misogyny, she knew he was growing more and more uncomfortable around her. He had no clue what to say to combat this daring from her, as he had little use for women other than for his own benefit – be it pleasure, a cook and a maid or for his daughter to make him look good with a gorgeous, All-American family..  

Watching him go, it hurt her heart to know he hadn’t even bothered to greet his granddaughter. “Such an asshole,” she whispered, then headed to the kitchen.

***

Cradling a sleeping Meghan against her side with one arm, Michelle used the hand of the other to unlock the front door and let them into the townhouse. The five year old was conked out after a long day with grandma and tons of sugar from cookies and icing and lots of excitement.

Trying to stay as quiet as possible so as not to wake her daughter before she could get her upstairs, Michelle entered the house. The living room light was on, the TV was on, the kitchen light was on, the light heading up the stairs was on and she could hear music drifting down from Alex’s bedroom.

Irritated, she closed and locked the front door and headed upstairs. When Meghan began to stir from the loud music, Michelle rubbed her back in soothing circles to try and get her to ease back into sleep.

“It’s okay,” she whispered to her daughter, who once again began to waken as she was lowered into her little princess bed in her bedroom. “Time for sleep, sweet girl.”

Eyes falling closed again, Meghan fell back into the sweet fog of exhaustion as her mother quickly undressed her down to her little undies before grabbing her My Little Pony nightgown and carefully easing it over her head and down her little body.

Getting her tucked in, Michelle leaned over her and left a kiss to her head. “Love you, my special angel,” she whispered into golden curls.

Assured her little one would sleep through the night, she walked to the door and eased it closed before heading further down the hall to her son’s room. Even with the door closed, the music made her teeth vibrate. Knowing he’d never hear her if she knocked, she opened the door.

Sure enough, there was Alex sitting at his desk, Bluetooth speakers blasting music from his phone. To his credit, however, which made a lot of her irritation drain, he was focused on the assignment he was working on.

Walking up behind him, she left a kiss to the top of his head, startling him. He looked up at her with wide eyes. Smiling at him, she lovingly brushed dark hair out of his beautiful blue eyes.

“You need to turn the music down, sweetheart,” she said, loud enough to be heard.

He quickly grabbed his phone and cut the music off, the silence as startling as the blasting beat had been. “When did you get home?” he asked.

“Just now. Got your sister to bed then came in here.” She nodded towards the school laptop open on his desk, the assignment on the screen. “How’s it going?”

Shrugging, he said, “Good. I only have two more left after this one.” He looked at her with pleading eyes. “If I finish tonight, can I go shoot hoops tomorrow with the guys?"

Studying him for a long moment, she tilted her head to the side a bit. How she adored this boy. Lightly brushing some shaggy dark strands out of his eyes again, she let out a sigh.

“Tell you what,” she said. “Finish what you’re doing then come downstairs.” She rested her forehead against his, looking into his eyes up close and personal. “Where you can turn off all the lights you left on,” she added, “and have a cookie.” Lifting her head, she smiled at the sheepish look on his face. “And we’ll talk about it. Okay?”

“Okay,” he said, his disappointment evident in his voice.

Mussing his hair, she walked out of the room, closing the door behind her as she knew the music – at a lower volume – would go back on. Sure enough, before she’d reached the top of the stairs, she heard the beat once again.

Shaking her head in amusement, Michelle trotted down the stairs. As much as it pained her sensibilities to do so, she left every damn light and TV on for Alex to take care of, just as she’d told him he needed to.

In the kitchen she went to the coffeemaker to make herself a cup. She planned to talk to Alex then take a nice, long hot bath and either watch a movie up in her room or do some reading. Whichever, she needed to relax. As she filled her Keurig for the one cup, she thought about her drive back home from her parents house.

She’d grown up in that house, in that neighborhood. The route she drove took her past Anastasia’s old house, her family long ago moving away. Once Anastasia had finished college, she, too had moved away and they’d lost contact. Plus, with her childhood friend beginning her career in nursing and Michelle beginning her life as a wife and mother, their lives had utterly diverged.

But, what memory had popped into mind at seeing that little blue and white house hadn’t been giggling sleepovers or comforting her friend after her first breakup with a boy. It hadn’t been the night they’d huddled together in Anastasia’s bedroom waiting for the results on the pregnancy test stick with bated breath, only for Michelle to hold her friend as she’d cried tears of relief their senior year of high school.

And, it hadn’t been when Anastasia had held her as Michelle cried tears of anger and dread after she’d been forced to accept Gavin’s proposal.

No, the memory seeing that house and the trusted friend it represented was one that had happened in the apartment Anastasia had been living in during college. It had been a tiny two-bedroom she’d shared with her roommate, a strange young college student named Priscilla.

They’d sat on the ratty old hand-me-down couch Anastasia had bought for twenty bucks and yet again, she’d held Michelle.

“You know what makes me the most angry in all this?” Michelle had cried, using the sleeve of her long sleeve tee to wipe at her eyes and the damn tears that just wouldn’t stop falling.

“What?” her friend had asked, combing her fingers through long blonde hair. “The fact that you have to spend your life with that idiot?”

Smiling, as she knew how much Anastasia could not stand Gavin, Michelle shook her head. “No. Well, yes,” she amended, “but more than that.” She pulled away so she could look at her friend, even as she felt so stupid in what she was about to say. “I’ve come to terms with the fact that we’re getting married. I mean,” she snorted, “We’ve been dating now for-frigging-ever, but the fact that there is one thing I have no choice about. Something so personal and important to me.”

“What’s that?” Anastasia asked, leaning over to snag some tissues from the box on the coffee table and handing them to Michelle who took them and wiped at her eyes and nose.

“I know I watch way too many romantic comedies and read way too many books, but I don’t want my first time to be given to him.” She searched the eyes of the young woman sitting next to her. “Is that really stupid? That I want it to be special?”

“It’s not stupid at all, Chelle,” Anastasia said. Her eyebrows raised for her coming point. “Remember how pissed at myself I was for giving in to that asshole our junior year?”

Michelle nodded, blowing her nose. “Yeah.” She tossed the soiled tissues into a nearby trashcan just inside the kitchen. “I just want something for me,” she blew out, staring off into a future she absolutely did not want. “And honestly,” she added, looking back to her friend. “I’m afraid with Gavin it’ll hurt.”

Dark eyebrows drew. “He wouldn’t hurt you, would he? I mean, like on purpose?”

Shaking her head, Michelle said, “No. Not like attack me or something. But he has zero sensitivity with pretty much anything. So ….” She shrugged. “Stupid, I know.” Letting out a heavy sigh, she looked down at her hands, which were resting in her lap. “This sucks.”

Staring down at her cup, which was filling with fragrant brew, Michelle sighed again. She’d been right and it certainly had sucked, but she’d always wonder if it would have been worse if she hadn’t –

“Hey.”

Hed whipping upwards as she was ripped out of her thoughts, she saw Alex padding into the kitchen in one of his endless pairs of basketball shorts and a t-shirt. It didn’t matter if it was three hundred degrees outside or negative three hundred degrees, that was his chosen outfit at home. If she didn’t shell the money out for them herself, she’d question if he owned any pants or shoes.

“Hey, sweetie,” she said, pleased when she noticed that he’d turned off the trail of lights and electronics he’d left on. “Want me to make you some hot cocoa?” she asked, knowing his weakness for his Swiss Miss.

Grinning, he nodded. “Yeah.” He flopped down in one of the kitchen chairs around the round wooden table. “Was Grandpa Cliff mad I wasn’t there?” he asked.

Smirking, Michelle shrugged a shoulder as she left her coffee for a moment to gather what was needed for his hot beverage of choice. “You know your grandpa,” she hedged.

“Yeah.” He was quiet for a moment, seeming to have something on his mind.

Michelle said nothing as she knew to push him was the very wrong thing to do. She’d been encouraging him to speak, to truly be open about his thoughts or feelings. So, when he did, she allowed him the space to do it in his own way and his own time.

Instead, she busied herself measuring out the appropriate amount of milk and dumped it into the saucepan to make his hot cocoa the old fashioned way rather than with water in the microwave.

“Dad called me today,” he began at length.

Michelle bristled at that, as that usually never went well, but kept her back to him as she stood at the stove waiting for the milk to heat up. “Oh?” she responded, managing to keep her tone conversational.

“He’s not coming to my game Friday night.” The disappointment was palpable in Alex’s quiet tone.

Fury rushed through Michelle at this news, which honestly shouldn’t have surprised her. Gavin had made it very clear that, even as he continued to make her life hell by fighting every goddamn thing in the dissolution of his first family, he was well on his way to creating his second.

And, despite the fact that it had been him who had pushed Alex to play the sport, he couldn’t even be man enough to be there and cheer him on.

Asshole.

Turning away from the stove, she walked over to her son and bent over him to hug him from behind. She took a moment to organize her thoughts and push her own feelings down before speaking.

“Your dad,” she began softly, “doesn’t always make choices and decisions that make a lot of sense to us, sweetheart.” She left a kiss to the side of his head. “But, he loves you. I know this is hard and I can’t speak for him. But know that I’ll be there, okay? Me and Meghan will scream our heads off like raving lunatics to support you.”

He smiled at her words. “Thanks, Mom.”

She left a series of loud, obnoxious kisses to his cheek then walked back to the stove. “If you want to run out to the car and grab the container of cookies, we can have some with our coffee and hot chocolate,” she said.

Carrying Meghan, she hadn’t had enough hands to grab those, too and unlock the front door. She laughed outright as the empty kitchen chair rocked on the tile floor from the abruptness of the departure of her very excited son. That boy loved his cookies.

 

3.

            This is insane. Why am I here? This thought went through Michelle’s mind over and over again as she walked from the parking lot of the apartment complex to the door with 203 upon it. Her heart was racing and her palms were sweaty. Staring at the door, she blew out a long, nervous breath.

            She could leave, she knew that. She didn’t have to do this. Right? Her curiosity got the better of her anxiety and she raised a fist, knocking firmly three times on the wood. She was pretty sure she was going to faint from her heart racing so hard when she heard footfalls on the other side of the door and then the sound of disengaging locks.

            A moment later, the door opened. Standing on the other side was the most beautiful woman Michelle had ever seen. Her long, ebony hair was pushed back over one shoulder and she had the facial structure and features of a runway model, yet wore no makeup or even earrings. Her lips were full and quirked up in a slight smirk.

            But, what got Michelle the most were her eyes. They were gray and extremely intense as they looked back at Michelle. As stunning as she was, the woman was equally sexy, and that fact made Michelle’s stomach flop again with renewed anxiety.

One ebony brow quirked in question.

            Her throat suddenly very dry, Michelle swallowed a few times before she managed lamely, “Trick or treat?” This, of course was the so-called, ‘code word’ Anastasia had told her to say, since names wouldn’t be exchanged.

            That smirk grew as the woman stepped aside. “That’s entirely up to you,” she said, allowing Michelle entry.

            With a little gasp, Michelle’s eyes flew open. Her heart was racing just as it had been that day so long ago. She also realized that her panties were completely saturated. She was painfully aroused and swollen. Closing her eyes, she rolled to her back from her side and rested a hand to her t-shirt clad stomach.

“Good god,” she blew out. How the hell could she be this goddamn aroused from something that had happened seventeen goddamn years ago?

Staring up at the ceiling, the gorgeous colors of dawn just beginning to paint the day with the magic of morning, she again saw her face.

Who was she kidding? She’d seen her face – or aspects of her body – off and on over the years in her slumber or her fantasies as she’d taken care of personal business. Lord knew she never enjoyed sex with Gavin, so she’d taken care of her own needs when he wasn’t there.

How many times had that night been part of the fodder to bring her to orgasm? It was hard for her to admit that. But, the woman of that night had morphed from a real person into a woman of her mind, safe to think about, fantasize about. She wasn’t in Michelle’s life, she hadn’t even known her name.

Until now.

“Fuck,” she whispered, hands coming up to cover her face.

“Mommy?”

Hands falling away, she looked over to see a sleepy Meghan making her way to the bed, her blankie dragged behind her like Michelle’s very own Linus from the Peanuts cartoon. Smiling, Michelle lifted the covers in invitation for her little snuggle bug to climb in for morning cuddles.

Blankie left on the floor in favor of the warm safety of her mommy, Meghan climbed onto the bed and beneath the covers.

Smiling, Michelle wrapped herself around the small body, Meghan instantly falling back to sleep with her head on her mother’s pillow. Michelle, however, was not quite so lucky. Her mind went back to her previous thoughts, though now the G-rated version. Rather than focusing on the seductress of yesterday, she thought about the teacher of today.

Funny thing was, she’d heard Alex talk about Miss Brannon before and he’d said he really liked her. He’d said she was super smart – his words – and super funny. She’d told Michelle she’d been teaching for eighteen years, so if that was true, that meant she’d been in her first year of teaching when they’d met.

That night they’d swapped absolutely no details, from names to life situations, outside of what apparently Anastasia had told her about Michelle’s upcoming situation. Cori, she thought. That was her name. Michelle had wondered that night and for a long time after. And, it was so strange to see her with such short hair.

Her mind went back to the long hair she’d had that night. It had been so soft, so shiny. But somehow, the short hair worked, too. She was simply striking either way, one of those women with natural beauty in spades.

After that night, Michelle had asked Anastasia why she’d sent her there, why she’d set that up with her roommate’s cousin. Her response had been confusing to Michelle at the time:

Because I knew you’d never let you be you.

In some ways Michelle had been hurt by that, but now, so many years later and without Gavin in her house or her bed, she was beginning to understand that a little bit better. Without the  picture of heterosexuality – married to a man with a mortgage and one-point-five kids – Michelle was left standing there basically naked, nowhere to hide.

Okay, so now what?  

***

The crowds were heavy as they bottlenecked their way into the high school’s stadium. The sun hadn’t gone down yet, so the early evening air was pleasant, though Michelle had brought jackets for both she and Meghan. Soon enough, it would start to get chilly in the mid-September night.

Meghan held in her arms so she wouldn’t get jostled or separated from Michelle, she made her way inside. Looking around, she tried to find a good spot for them to watch the game. She stopped at the bottom of the main aisle, intending to walk up into the stadium seating when someone bumped her.

“Oh, I’m sorry.”

Turning, Michelle was stunned to find herself looking into the face of Alex’s teacher, Miss Brannon. She was dressed casually in loose-fitting track pants and a hoodie with baseball cap on, sporting the high school’s logo. The teacher immediately smiled.

“We meet again,” she laughed.

Unable to help herself, Michelle returned the amusement. “So we do.” As if by silent agreement, Michelle headed up the aisle she’d been standing at the bottom of, Cori Brannon following, as a crush of people were behind them.

Finding a row that wasn’t too crowded yet, Michelle turned down it, glancing over her shoulder to see if the other woman was following or even wanted to go with them. Sure enough, she was right behind them.

“This okay?” Michelle asked, stopping at the midway point in the row.

“Perfect,” Miss Brannon said.

Michelle sat, setting Meghan on the metal bench next to her, the teacher on the other side of the little girl who was looking at her. “Do I need to scoot down?” Michelle asked. “Make room for anyone else?”

“Nope,” Miss Brannon said with a grin. “Just me. A couple of my juniors and,” she indicated Michelle, “one of my freshmen are playing tonight.”

Surprised, Michelle stared. “You came to watch your students play?”

The teacher nodded, reaching up to readjust the baseball cap a bit. “I have a couple that don’t always have parents who come watch,” she explained. “They have to work or whatever the situation may be.” She shrugged as she met Michelle’s gaze again, though her own was hidden behind the dark lenses of her sunglasses. “I feel it’s important they know somebody cares.”

All Michelle could do was shake her head in wonder. “That’s really amazing, Miss Brannon. A teacher to care so much.”

“I think by now you can call me Cori,” she said with a chuckle, and not sure if to her relief or embarrassment, this time Michelle did see recognition. “I get Miss Brannon all day.”

Amused, and damn it, blushing, Michelle nodded and cleared her throat. “Cori it is. If you call me Michelle.”

“I can do that.” They shared a smile before Cori looked down at Meghan. She slid her sunglasses off and up to rest back against the front of her baseball cap. “And, who are you, little miss?” she asked in the universal voice for just about anyone speaking to a young child.

Meghan looked up at Michelle, as if making sure it was okay to talk to her. Running her fingers through blonde curls, Michelle nodded. “It’s okay, sweetie,” she said softly. “You can tell her.”

“Meghan.”

Cori’s smile was beautiful as she held her hand out. “Meghan, it’s so amazing to meet you. I’m Cori.”

Meghan took the hand and grinned. “Hi.”

“She’s adorable,” Cori said, glancing up at Michelle as the teacher was still bent over a bit to be more on the girl’s level. “She’s got to be the prettiest little girl I’ve ever seen.”

Michelle’s heart swelled with pride and love for her daughter. “Thank you.” She wrapped an arm around her little one and left a kiss to the top of her head. “She’s my little piglet.”

Cori smiled, clearly charmed.

“Meghan,” Michelle added, “this is one of Alex’s teachers.” She grinned, seeing from the excited look on the little girl’s face that Cori Brannon had risen in her esteem greatly. Anyone attached to her big brother was good in her book.

“How old is she?” Cori asked.

“She’ll be six this spring.”

“My nephew is turning six in December,” she said, sitting up straight again and glancing over the girl’s head to her mom. “We should do a playdate sometime.”

Michelle felt shy again, like she was a friggin’ teenager around a pretty girl. Forcing herself to snap out of it, she nodded. “I think Meghan would absolutely love that. Since moving over the summer, all her little friends in the neighborhood were left behind of course, so it’s been hard for her.”

She combed her fingers through soft curls absently, Meghan’s attention now down to what was happening on the field as the cheerleaders came out to entertain the crowd before the game started.

“I’m sorry you guys have had to go through that, Michelle,” Cori said. "My folks split when I was about twelve, and it was such a mess. Really hard on my brother and I.”

“I’m sorry you had to go through that,” Michelle said, meaning it. The last year had been a nightmare for her, and to have to go through it as a child …. Daily she had so much guilt over what her children were being put through, even if it was for the best. “I will never go through this again,” she said. “I can tell you that. Sure as heck won’t put them through it again.”

“How long were you married?” Cori asked gently.

“It would be seventeen years in February,”

Cori’s eyebrows shot up. “That’s a long time, Michelle.”

Making sure Meghan wasn’t looking at her, Michelle mouthed the words, too long. At the small smile of understanding she got, Michelle turned to the field when the marching band began to play.

***

Despite it being a very exciting game and even more so because the home team won, or perhaps because of, Meghan was utterly conked out. Michelle carried her as she and Cori made their way along with the throngs of excited fans leaving the stadium.

“Where are you parked?” Cori asked once they reached the parking lot.

“Over there,” Michelle said, pointing in the general direction. “By that ginormous truck.”

Chuckling, Cori said, “I see it. Can’t see much else besides it, actually.”

“No kidding. I can’t even imagine the gas mileage he doesn’t get with those massive tires.” Cori cackled, making Michelle grin.

“Well,” the teacher said, “I’m all the way over there,” she said pointing in the opposite direction. “Do you need help getting Meghan settled? Need me to open the door or anything?”

Touched, Michelle smiled and shook her head. “No, but thank you. This arm,” she said, shrugging her left shoulder to indicate which, “is my Popeye arm from balancing her while my other hand gets everything else done.”

Cori grinned. “I can imagine. Well,” she said, gently resting a hand on Meghan’s back, though not enough to wake her. “I must say, it was a hoot to watch this little one get up and wiggle her butt every time the team scored.”

Laughing, Michelle nodded. “I have no idea where that came from.”

“She’s just naturally adorable, that’s all.”

“Lord help me when she’s a teenager,” Michelle quipped.

“You’ll have your hands full, Mrs. Kasey,” the teacher teased. “Especially if she does the butt wiggle thing at sixteen.” She laughed at the glare she got. “Alright,” Cori said, sobering,  “Well you have a good night.” She gave Michelle a winning smile. “It was a lot of fun watching the game with you guys.”

“You, too. Goodnight.”

With a wave, the teacher turned and headed in the direction of her own car. Michelle watched her go for a moment, her gaze dropping to an incredible ass, the material of the track pants making that quite obvious with every step she took. Forcing herself to look away, Michelle headed to the Explorer to get Meghan tucked in and wait for Alex to get changed from his pads in the locker room and join them.

***

            “Do you really have to go this dark, Alex?” Michelle asked, a honey colored eyebrow raised in question.

“Yeah!” he said, excited as he held up the third little bottle of fake blood. “Xavier is totally gruesome in the game,” he explained. “It won’t look right if I don’t have enough blood.”

“And,” Michelle drawled, still doubtful. “you’re not going to get yourself into trouble with the principal or your teachers if you do?”

“Mom,” he whined. “You said I could be him for Halloween.”

Sighing, Michelle nodded. “Okay, but if you get into trouble, I’m going to go all Xavier on your butt, got me?” she asked, picking up the fake hatchet used by the character that had already been tossed into their cart

Grinning, he tossed the bottle of fake blood into the shopping cart with the rest of the items that would make up his costume as the video game character.

“Mommy!” Meghan exclaimed from where she sat in the kid part of the cart. “Look! Alex’s teacher!”

Michelle glanced over and, sure enough, Cori Brannon was strolling down the Halloween aisle, a shopping basket held by her right hand. She looked as though she were still dressed from her day at school, professional without being overly dressy. She also looked rather amused as she walked up to the family of three.

“Hiya, cutie,” she said to Meghan, playfully tweaking her nose. Looking at Michelle she smiled. “Hey there. Clearly you have moved into my neighborhood,” she said, indicating the neighborhood store they all stood in.

Laughing, Michelle nodded. “Either that or you’re stalking us.”

Michelle looked at Alex, who looked like he was about to sink into the floor with embarrassment. Michelle realized she needed to play it far more ‘professional’ with Cori when he was around. She was his teacher and Michelle remembered well how shy she would feel when seeing one of her teachers out in the real world somewhere.

Seeming to redirect herself also, Cori turned to her student. “Getting your costume ready for next week, Alex?”

He nodded, shoving his hands into the pockets of his jeans. “Yeah.”

“Very cool, mister.” She reached out and playfully tapped the bill of the baseball cap he wore. “Good job today in class, kiddo.” Cori raised her hand and he slapped it, high five style.

Michelle watched the interaction between the teacher and her son. She knew Alex really liked her, and though he was about fourteen shades of blush, she could tell he was proud of himself with the compliment given. She’d have to ask later what happened, not wanting to embarrass him more by asking in front of his teacher.

She really paid attention to how Cori was with him. It was clear she really cared, which Michelle had gotten from not only Cori’s initial email to her to meet to discuss Alex’s performance in her class, but also her showing up at the football game several weeks ago. Michelle had gone to every single one of Alex’s games since, but hadn’t run into Cori again.

No doubt she had been there, lost in the crowd somewhere. And, though it had crossed Michele’s mind to look for her or even email her and ask if she was going, she hadn’t. She was very confused on how she felt about all of this.

She liked Cori, the woman she now was acquainted with, but damn it all, her mind went back to that night every damn time she saw her, and Michelle knew that was dangerous. Cori Brannon was Alex’s teacher and a professional. It wouldn’t do for her to have a damn crush on her, especially when the very thought of such a thing left her feeling so many things in her gut from confusion to aroused to ashamed.

“Well,” Cori said, garnering Michelle’s attention again. “I’ll leave you three be. I came to get my Halloween candy for trick-or-treaters,” she said, indicating the aisle a bit further down, the shelves all orange and black from the Halloween colors of the bagged candy that filled them. “Have a good night, all.” She gave them all a brilliant smile then walked away.

Was it wrong that Michelle didn’t want her to go? Was it wrong that she wanted to ask for her phone number so maybe the two could become friends? Was it wrong that she wanted a redo on that night now that she was no longer a terrified twenty-one-year-old bride-to-be?

Forcing her gaze away from the past, she looked to her children and her present. Alex and Meghan, she thought. That was where her focus needed to stay.

 

4.

Seventeen years ago

            This is insane. Why am I here? This thought went through Michelle’s mind over and over again as she walked from the parking lot of the apartment complex to the door with 203 upon it. Her heart was racing and her palms were sweaty. Staring at the door, she blew out a long, nervous breath.

She could leave, she knew that. She didn’t have to do this. Right? Her curiosity got the better of her anxiety and she raised a fist, knocking firmly three times on the wood. She was pretty sure she was going to faint from her heart racing so hard when she heard footfalls on the other side of the door and then the sound of disengaging locks.

A moment later, the door opened. Standing on the other side was the most beautiful woman Michelle had ever seen. Her long, ebony hair was pushed back over one shoulder and she had the facial structure and features of a runway model, yet wore no makeup or even earrings. Her lips were full and quirked up in a slight smirk.

But, what got Michelle the most were her eyes. They were gray and extremely intense as they looked back at Michelle. As stunning as she was, the woman was equally sexy, and that fact made Michelle’s stomach flop again with renewed anxiety.

One ebony brow quirked in question.

Her throat suddenly very dry, Michelle swallowed a few times before she managed lamely, “Trick or treat?” This, of course was the so-called, ‘code word’ Anastasia had told her to say, since names wouldn’t be exchanged.

That smirk grew as the woman stepped aside. “That’s entirely up to you,” she said, allowing Michelle entry.

Those words sent a little thrill of nervous excitement through Michelle, but deciding to be a big girl, she stepped across the threshold. The vampire movies her father loved to watch so much popped into mind. Yes, it was the vampire that had to be invited in, but had she just sealed her own fate by taking the invitation?

She smirked at her own musings, which were simply to try and help quell her unbelievable nervousness. Honestly, she wasn’t entirely sure why she was there. All Anastasia had told her was this woman would help her with a, ‘very personal problem’ and, ‘give her something to think about when stuck lying next to Gavin’.

The front door opened into a small living room, which was furnished and decorated much like a young adult or college student’s would be: worn furniture and posters of the interests of the day. Nothing too sophisticated in décor, but the place was very clean and neat. Her focus turned from her surrounds back to her hostess.

She looked to be Michelle’s age, perhaps a year or two older. She was dressed in comfortable looking cotton pants that outlined an incredibly shapely behind and muscular thighs. The fitted tank top she wore showed off strong shoulders and toned arms and gorgeous breasts cradled by the material of the tank top and nothing more. There was no bra, so the shape of them were beautifully defined, as well as her nipples, which pushed against the material.

Michelle forced herself to look away from them, as it made her anxiety go through the roof. “Um,” she said finally, the woman watching her very carefully. “I’m not entirely sure why I’m here.”

She felt so stupid, so small and so incredibly young next to this woman who, though close to her own age, seemed to have the knowledge and understanding of the world in her eyes. Without saying anything, the woman took Michelle’s hand and led her deeper into the small apartment.

They walked through the galley-style kitchen and past a bathroom before they ended up in the one bedroom in the unit. Like the other rooms, the bedroom was small but neat and clean. A queen sized bed was the centerpiece,, with closed sliding closet doors and a dresser to accompany.

A huge framed poster of a single red apple with a bite taken from it was the only decoration. The text on the poster read: Knowledge, the juiciest bite you’ll ever take. The bedding was folded down at the end of the bed, leaving just the fitted sheet and two pillows on the bed. There was also something else on the bed, a black satin bag with drawstring that had something in it.

Turning to the woman who released her hand once they reached the bed, Michelle saw that yes, this woman was still as stunning as she’d been for the last five minutes, but now there was something else in her magnificent gray eyes. It was a tenderness, a compassion that confused Michelle even more.

“Anastasia explained your situation to me,” she began. “You’re getting married in a few months but want something for yourself first.”

Michelle gasped, eyes growing wide as understanding began to dawn. Swallowing, she nodded. “Yes.”

A soft smile spread across full lips that had Michelle so curious. “I’m nobody,” the woman said. “Just a woman who loves other women and who didn’t happen to have any plans for Halloween night.” Her smile was blinding and completely disarming. “And,” she added, her eyes searching Michelle’s, though Michelle wasn’t sure what for. “Since this is just for you,” she added softly, “that means it’s nobody’s business but whomever you wish to tell. I won’t say a word. What happens in this room,” she said, indicating the bedroom they stood in, “or doesn’t happen in this room, is between us.”

That made Michelle feel so much better, as though she were in a safe place for things she was even afraid to tell herself. Swallowing again, she nodded. “Okay. I …. I don’t know what to do.”

The woman took a step towards her, entering into her personal space. “That’s okay,” she murmured. “That’s why I’m here.”

The first touch of her lips was unlike anything Michelle had ever experienced. They were so soft, so gentle and unbelievably sensuous in how they toyed with her own, teased, coaxed and lured. And, when her tongue lightly brushed against Michelle’s, she knew she was in deep trouble.

Gavin was the only person she’d ever kissed. Though they’d never had sex nor gone to “second base”, as it were, they’d kissed. A lot. Every damn time she saw him he was sticking his tongue down her throat. Never, in all those times, had it been like this. She literally felt she was floating away on a cloud of sensuality, each brush, stroke or touch amping up her arousal, which was another very new thing for her. Well, that is being aroused by a person she was being touched by.

Somewhere in her mind she realized that the hem of her sweater was being pulled upwards, and though part of her wanted to panic and bat the woman’s hands away, the larger part of herself welcomed it and lifted her arms to allow the garment passage and finally, to be fully removed and tossed to the floor.

The woman’s warm hands rested on Michelle’s naked sides as she stood there in her bra and jeans. A little moan escaped her lips into their kiss, resuming once the sweater was gone, as those hands went on the move. They slid up her sides and to her back, as if to feel, explore and touch.

Michelle forced out every ounce of guilt as she allowed herself to enjoy this, to lean into it. It had been made very clear from a very young age that Michelle’s father had some seriously antiquated ideas when it came to what a daughter’s purpose was. Sure, it was to make her parents proud, but not by getting a good job or having a career saving homeless children.

No, for Cliff McAvoy, it meant being a good wife and popping out grandchildren for him to brag about. It meant handing over the leash lead to the man he’d personally picked out to take over as commander and chief. It meant putting Michelle in a box where, heads Gavin wins, tails Michelle loses. Either way, Cliff looked good.

Fuck you, Dad. Fuck you, Gavin.

She gasped when fingernails lightly trailed over her bra-clad breasts, her nipples instantly growing even harder, almost to the point of painful. To her surprise at her boldness, Michelle’s own hands went on the move. She felt the softness of the tank top on her fingertips, then the soft warmth of the skin beneath.

The woman kissing her and touching her moaned in approval and encouragement of the tentative exploration. Hands continuing up under the tank top, Michelle nearly whimpered at the expanse of softness, feeling the woman’s sides and her back, unencumbered by a bra strap. It was just an expanse of softness covering feminine strength.

It nearly left her speechless at the beauty of what she was being allowed to touch and explore. There was no gross body hair or massive size to intimidate her own small frame. In fact, she and the other woman were similar in size, Michelle just a bit shorter.

She felt so secure and safe as she touched this woman. She knew in her heart there would be no bellowed demands or corrections of whatever she did or said.  She felt she was an equal in this, whatever exactly this was, and that she was allowed to explore and be curious. And oh, she was curious, so much so it scared her.

The other woman moved out of the kiss, meeting Michelle’s gaze for a moment before she took a partial step back. Without preamble, she whipped her tank top up and over her head, sending it flying to land near Michelle’s sweater on the floor. Next, her hands pushed on the waistband of the cotton pants, sending them and her panties down over her hips and down strong thighs to puddle at her feet.

Michelle stared, lips falling open at the goddess that was revealed. She’d never in her life been this close to a naked woman before, save for her classmates in gym class. And even then, she’d averted her eyes as she was far too afraid of what she may give away if she looked at any one of them.

Pants and panties kicked away, she walked back to Michelle and, leaving a soft kiss to her lips, reached around her to unclasp her bra then unbuttoned her jeans as Michelle pulled off the unclasped bra and let it fall to the floor. She watched as her jeans and panties were pushed down to settle around her thighs.

The woman met her gaze, gray eyes filled with fire, but it was clear their owner was trying to control the heat.

“I need to know,” she said softly, “are you sure you want to do this?” She reached to the bed and grabbed the satin bag. Fingering open the drawstring mouth, she pulled out the dildo and leather harness from inside. “Once I do this, it can’t be undone,” she said gently.

Michelle looked at it, a little gasp escaping her lips. Full understanding now of just how consequential this truly was hit her. Curious, and admittedly a little afraid, she took the purple dildo from the other woman’s hands. Though not exactly “lifelike”, it was clear what it was intended for, and as she stroked the silicone material, she knew it was what she wanted.

Saying nothing, she met those eyes and held the dildo out to the other woman. Clearly what she wanted was in her eyes, because with a sexy little smile, the dildo was taken from Michelle’s hand and set on the bed along with the harness.

“Sit on the bed,” was instructed. When Michelle did, the woman knelt down and removed her boots and socks before tugging her jeans and panties fully off and tossing them aside. Standing again, the woman leaned over her and initiated a deep, sensual kiss before murmuring against her lips, “Lay back.”

Michelle scooted more fully onto the bed and turned her body until her head lay on one of the pillows. Her heart was racing so fast she worried she’d faint. Yes, she was still nervous, but more than anything now, she was excited. She watched as the woman buckled herself into the contraption that was the harness, the purple dildo slid into place so it jutted out obscenely from her hips.

They shared an amused gaze at the absurdity of the situation as the dong bobbed with her every movement as she, too climbed onto the bed. She moved over until she reclined on her side next to Michelle. Her gaze scanned over Michelle’s body, her eyes hungry even as her touch was gentle as her fingers trailed behind her gaze.

“You are so stunningly beautiful,” she murmured, her gaze finally meeting Michelle’s again.

“So are you,” Michelle whispered, meaning it. In fact, she thought this woman was the most gorgeous woman she’d ever seen. Her face, eyes and body were exquisite.

Her eyes fell closed when the woman’s head lowered to the closest breast to her and the tongue Michelle had enjoyed so much against her own slowly ran across the tip of her nipple. Unable to help it, her back arched in invitation, which was quickly taken. The nipple was pulled into the volcanic warmth of the woman’s mouth.

A little sigh escaped her lips, which fell open at the incredible sensations that simple act sent shooting throughout her entire body. She felt restless, her body warm and an ache pulsing between her legs that was bordering on uncomfortable. She could feel the wetness of arousal slicking the insides of her thighs.

The aching was getting stronger and an intrinsic need to be touched. And, when a warm hand palmed her other breast, it garnered a whimper of need from her. Her fingers found the soft length of the woman’s dark hair and, needing to feel her in any way possible, buried themselves in it.  

The hot mouth moved to her other breast, which meant the woman had to move across her body a bit. The long, dark hair brushed Michelle’s skin, which was so sensitized, she was surprised she hadn’t orgasmed from that. After many incredible moments, the breast was released and the woman’s head lifted.

“Are you ready?” she asked softly, using her fingers to tuck long blonde hair behind one of Michelle’s ears.

Nodding, Michelle welcomed the body that moved atop her own. Her nerves returned when she felt the phallus strapped to the woman’s hips align so its length was tucked between Michelle’s swollen folds. That nervousness eased when they began to kiss again and she realized that the softness she was feeling pressing against her breasts were the gorgeous ones of the woman atop her.

That realization and mental visual alone made Michelle’s hips jerk a bit as her knees lifted and legs spread as the other woman got settled between them. Her hands roamed over the expanse of the smoothness of the woman’s back again as they kissed, slow and again that word came to her mind, sensual. Everything about this woman was sensual and profoundly sexy.

Michelle moaned a bit as the woman’s hips began to move, the length of the dildo slowly gliding through her wetness, the nub at the end rolling over her incredibly hard clit with every pass. Her legs fell open wider, so badly wanting what was happening now. She wanted this woman inside her, wanted this first experience to be with her.

Seeming to sense that Michelle was ready, the woman’s hips lifted enough for the tip of the dildo to push against the opening to Michelle’s most private place. The kiss never stopped as the woman’s hips eased down again, pushing the length of the dildo inside of Michelle’s incredibly ready body as it went.

The immensity of Michelle’s arousal had relaxed her body to the point of fully accepting the foreign intrusion with little fanfare and no pain. In fact, it felt incredible, if not strange, knowing what it was and why. When their hips were flush again, they both moaned. The kiss ended and the woman lifted her head.

Looking down into Michelle’s eyes, their gazes held and Michelle felt something pass between them. Yes, what they were doing was incredibly intimate and deeply personal, but it was more than just a connection of situation, more than just two perfect strangers coming together for an exquisite moment of circumstance.

No, this was deeper than that, and it was something Michelle didn’t understand, as she’d never felt it before. She cared about Gavin as he’d been in her life a long time and she’d be marrying him in February.

But, she knew she didn’t love him in the way she was supposed to, and wondered if she ever would. She knew one thing for sure – looking into his eyes, she felt nothing like what she was feeling with this woman.

It certainly wasn’t love, as that only happened in the sappiest of books. But, it was attraction, it was connection and it was a desire to know more, to understand this person and to have them around. It was a desire to unlock the door that could allow something deeper, something –

No!

Michelle forced her thoughts away from where they so desperately wanted to go. This was their moment, nothing more, and she needed to focus on that. She needed to remember every single moment, every single detail because it would be her teddy bear ever after.

Cupping the back of a dark head, Michelle urged her down for a kiss, this one demanding from Michelle, needing to take her mind from where it wanted to go. Seeming to understand the need if not the why, the woman’s response was passionate, even as she kept the kiss from getting out of control.

The kiss finally broke as a steady rhythm began between Michelle’s legs. It wasn’t fast or pounding, but it wasn’t exactly slow, either. It was steady with long strokes inside of her. The strangeness of the new sensations were overtaken by the surprising pleasure. And, when the woman rose to her hands, a powerful body keeping her hips moving, Michelle could feel that pleasure beginning to crest.

Deep inside of her, her orgasm was building and, with each deep, steady thrust, it was climbing to the surface. Hooking her hands around the backsides of the woman’s shoulders, Michelle hung on for dear life, as she worried she’d get lost in the crashing wave as it slammed over and through her.

Her eyes squeezed shut as a loud cry erupted from her even as her breath was stolen as pleasure exploded through her. She literally felt as though she had been shot out of her own body by the violence of the physiological chain reaction to the intensity of it all. Dimly she was aware that the thrusts continued for a few more moments until an echoing cry followed her own and her body was crushed against that atop her.

Her brain no longer involved, Michelle’s body instinctively wrapped itself around the panting woman who clung to her. Arms and legs wrapped around her body, Michelle held her tight, one hand cupped a dark head as the other woman buried her face in her neck. Neither said a word, just simply rode out the continuing waves of sensation, body and heart.

 

5.

Present day

            Cori lay in bed, staring up at the ceiling. She was waiting for her body to cool down, and was about to open the bedroom window to help the process. It was Halloween, and how appropriate for her to have that dream. No, that memory. It had been a very, very long time since she’d really let herself think about it. Think about her.

What a crazy situation, she thought. Her cousin, Priscila, who she wasn’t even that close to, had called her up one day and said her roommate, whom Cori had never met, needed to talk to her.

            “Hey, Cori. I’m Anastasia, thanks for talking to me. Listen, my best friend is about to get married, and honestly, I think it’s the biggest mistake of her life. I’m pretty sure she’s a lesbian, and honestly, I want to give her the chance to maybe figure that out before she marries this asshole. If nothing else, she can have one last thing for her before she does.”

            Confused, Cori had plopped down on her couch, phone held to her ear. “Okay, so what are you wanting me to do?” she asked the woman on the other end of the line. “Talk to her, or – “

            “I want you to sleep with her.”

            Cori’s eyes nearly bugged out of her head at that. “Wait, what?”

            “I know,” Anastasia pushed on. “It sounds totally crass, and I don’t mean to insult you at all, so I hope you don’t take it that way, Cori. But, she’s a virgin and I know she’s pissed as hell to give that to this guy, who by the way, her parents are kinda forcing the marriage issue.”

            Bringing up one leg to cross over the other with the ankle over the knee, Cori considered what she was being told. Hey, she was single and loved a good fuck, but this was a little more complicated than that.

            “So,” the voice on the other end of the line added, “either way it gives her something to cherish, an experience. Does that make sense at all?”

            Cori smiled, staring down at her tennis shoe, which jiggled in her nervous energy at the whole situation. “It does,” she said quietly. “When were you looking for this to happen?”

            “What are you doing on Halloween?”

            “What, indeed?” she muttered, glancing to the very window she’d just been thinking of opening.

Blowing out an amused breath, her gaze went back to the ceiling. No, this Halloween would be much, much different than the one seventeen years ago. That dream-memory had been so damn vivid. Cori had taken the taste of Michelle’s skin and the sound of her cries of pleasure into wakefulness.

How had this happened? Nearly twenty years and a woman who had made such a huge impression on her, yet, whom she hadn’t even known her name – until now – pops back into her life in a most unexpected way.

“Shit,” she whispered.

Deciding to get up as her alarm would be going off in minutes anyway, she pushed the covers off her body and climbed out of bed, tapping her phone alarm so it wouldn’t go off. It was a cold morning, though snow wasn’t predicted. She hoped it would be warm enough for her brother, Tyler and his wife, Chris to bring Cori’s most favorite person in the world by before trick-or-treating – her nephew Aiden.

Cori and Tyler had been raised by a woman who was in a constant battle with addiction, whether it was with substances, food or sex, thus the destruction of the twenty-year marriage for their parents when Cori had been twelve and Tyler fourteen. Their father had had enough and took his kids and left their mother after her third and final affair.

It had been a maddening childhood, Cori and Tyler leaning heavily on each other as their father was the only one working most the time, so was gone a lot. Even so, him taking the three of them off the insanity that had been the rollercoaster named Stephanie, had brought the kids closer to their father. They were all three close to this day, Stephanie in and out of their lives, based on the winds of her constant and drama-inducing change.

Now, Cori was a forty year old woman who was extremely gun shy with relationships, as her mother had effectively destroyed any real ability to trust within her daughter. Even Tyler, he’d waited until he was in his late thirties to finally pull the trigger with the woman he’d been with for more than a decade and propose.

But then, after a decade, mortgage and a son together, Chris pretty much had given him the option of, put a ring on her finger, let her put a ring on his, or she’d find someone who would. Luckily, Cori’s brother had grown a brain and had taken the plunge last year. A happily ever after was the result.

Could Cori be that brave to try again? The one time she had had been a disaster. She shuddered at the thought of Lauren.

Padding to the bathroom attached to her bedroom, Cori looked at her reflection in the mirror above the sink. She looked tired, that dream clearly taking a lot out of her night. Running a hand through her short hair, she turned her head this way and that, always on the lookout for gray. With such dark hair, it would come in quite clear.

Satisfied that she’d lived another day without, she chuckled at herself and did her morning business before stripping out of her pajama pants and tank top to grab a shower. As she stood under that warm spray, Michelle had come back to mind, which was a dangerous thing.

She was the mother of one of her students, and that was a ginormous no-no. It was even highly frowned upon for friendships outside of school between the teachers and parents. The funny part was, other than when Cori had emailed Michelle in the capacity of a concerned teacher, there had been absolutely no intended contact by either party.

Sitting with Michelle and Meghan that night at the game had been pushing boundaries, but it hadn’t been a prearranged meeting at the game, so it fell in that gray area. That gray area was precisely why Cori had gone out of her way to not run into Michelle again during the football season, regardless of how much she’d wanted to. They’d had fun together at the game, and frankly, Meghan was becoming Cori’s second favorite person, next to her nephew.

Damn, that little girl was so cute. And, it was astounding just how much Michelle’s kids looked like her. Clearly Alex had gotten dark hair from his father or somewhere else in the family tree, but he had his mother’s eyes and her smile. He was a handsome boy and a really good kid.

After nearly twenty years in the classroom, she had a pretty good eye for the good apples, the bad apples and the misunderstood apples. And, though Cori had spent very limited time with Michelle since she’d resurfaced in her life, Cori had a feeling that so much of Alex’s good nature and good heart came from his mother, as Cori saw similarities in their personalities and energy.

Drying herself off after her shower, she snorted. Why couldn’t Michelle end up being a real bitch? Would certainly make things easier, that was for sure. Hanging up her damp towel to dry, Cori ran a comb through her short hair, water squeezed out as best as she could with the towel, then padded back into her bedroom to get dressed for work.

That first day so long ago, Cori had thought Michelle was gorgeous, but the adorably natural kind where the woman had not one clue just how truly beautiful she was.

The ironic thing was, the so-called all-American girl with blonde hair and blue eyes typically wasn’t Cori’s type at all. She usually liked a woman with more exotic features or coloring, but something about that woman had touched her deeply and she’d been insanely attracted to her from the moment she’d opened her door to her knock.

Certainly, the honey blonde hair was beautiful, and so incredibly soft. Michelle’s features were so delicate and beautiful, also, let alone her body. But, it had been her eyes. The color of blue was striking, but more what had been within them. Something Cori had connected with instantly, and in their limited interactions now, she still felt it.

Inside those eyes she’d also seen Michelle’s soul. The beauty of that far exceeded that of the physical woman who possessed it. The stunning light of that soul was seen in her smile, felt in the gentleness of her touch and beat in the hearts of her children. Cori could see that same inner light in both Alex and Meghan, and knew without a doubt that it came from their mother.

Cori didn’t know the man Michelle had married so long ago, didn’t even know his name. She’d known Michelle’s best friend hadn’t liked him and had hoped that Michelle’s time with Cori would steer her away from that impending situation. Clearly it had not, but Cori knew each person had to think and act for themselves.

Back then, Anastasia had said she thought her friend was a lesbian, and from the way Michelle had been with Cori, had touched her and kissed her and accepted – and added to – their passionate hours together – Cori thought that was probably correct. Or, bare minimum, had attraction to other women in there somewhere.

Why had the marriage broken up? Or, had it broken down? Two different things.

Cori had experienced that in a relationship; once. She’d been with Lauren for seven very long years, longest relationship Cori had ever had. And honestly, it was one that should have ended around year three. But, manipulation and theatrics on Lauren’s part had kept the disaster going, slowly breaking Cori down in the process.

By the end, she’d been so empty, nothing left to give, not even to herself. Her world had been turned upside down by the insanity that was Lauren Beals, whom Tyler had pointed out after Cori had finally walked away, the woman had been a lot like their mother. And when Cori thought about it, yes she had. Lauren had been beautiful, exciting, passionate and toxic.

Just like their mother.

That had been five years ago, and Cori had remained single ever since, opting to focus on her kids at school and the small, but close group of friends she had. Funnily enough, Anastasia had remained in that circle, though far more in the periphery. They had the other’s phone number and were friends on Facebook.

Dressed, Cori cleaned up her bedroom, making her bed and stuffing dirty clothes from yesterday into the hamper then headed downstairs. She’d bought candy for her students for Halloween, and ripped into the bags to dump the bite-sized goodness into the huge plastic pumpkin she’d bought for this purpose.

Halloween being her favorite holiday, Cori tried to go all out for her kids. She always held costume contests and just let the students have fun. Besides, she’d learned very early on that, with the excitement of dressing up for Halloween and parties and such, most kids’ minds weren’t fully on the school day, anyway. So, she kept the work low and fun high. Tomorrow they’d get back to the nuts and bolts of her classes.

This, of course, brought Michelle back to mind. As she dumped the wrapped candy bars into the pumpkin, Cori grinned. She saw Michelle and the kids at Walmart the previous week again. The look on Michelle’s lovely face as she’d looked at her son like he’d lost his damn mind as they’d discussed Halloween preparations made Cori chuckle all over again.

When she’d turned down the aisle and had spotted the trio, before Meghan had spotted her, Cori had watched. Teaching for so long, she’d gotten to learn family dynamics quite well by observing student and parent or guardian.

It was easy to read the trust levels on both ends and to see what parent was making a show of actually being a good parent while sitting with a teacher as opposed to whom actually was a good parent behind closed doors. It was all in the kid’s eyes and body language. No matter what she or he may say, at that age, their eyes didn’t lie.

It hadn’t happened often, but once in a while a kid would come along who tried to hide how much she or he – typically the boys – adored their mother. Tough words and even stiff body language tried to make him seem like the uninterested or apathetic kid. But again, it was in the eyes. Alex Kasey genuinely respected and adored Michelle.

That happened from a lifetime of her giving him deep, unconditional love and trust, and therefore earning his in return. It wasn’t something that happened because he was having a good day with her or she got him the new video game he wanted. This told Cori so much about the woman who she’d tried her hardest to forget, yet was never fully able to.

And, she thought as she crumpled the final emptied candy bag to toss in the trash, that made her even more dangerous than she already was.

***

“Slow it down, boys!” Cori called out, the two giggling and sprinting boys immediately slowing down their race in the main hallway as those who had first lunch were heading to the cafeteria. “Thank you.”

“Sorry, Miss Brannon,” one of the boys called back.

Amused, she continued on as she had lunch duty this week. As expected, the day had been fun, the kids getting more and more creative each year with their costumes. It always amused her to see what they were into: what superhero did they follow? What cartoon character was their favorite as they wore it all day? Or, as in the case of the student she was eyeing as she stepped outside, what video game hero was their favorite?

Off by himself sat Alex Kasey. He sat against the wall of the gym building across the back parking lot, which was only used for maintenance or emergency vehicles. The area was usually where a lot of the loner kids hung out or those that didn’t have any friends on first lunch, their friends group on one of the two later lunches.

That wasn’t Alex, though. She knew he had a good group of kids he hung out with, so wondered why he wasn’t with them.

Shoving her hands into the puffy winter jacket she wore, she strolled over to him. “You know,” she said, still several feet from him. “I think you need more blood for your costume. I mean,” she added, reaching him, “Isn’t Xavier the Defender supposed to be a walking, talking Bonfils Blood Center donations dream?”

He looked up at her, surprise in his blue eyes but then looked back down to the sandwich he’d been munching on, his brown paper lunch bag sitting on the asphalt next to him. “Yeah,” he muttered. “My mom wouldn’t let me put anymore on. Said I was gross enough.”

Amused, Cori leaned back against the cold brick wall and slid down to her butt to sit next to him. “Well,” she drawled, “can’t say as I blame her. If you were my kid, you’d be sleeping in the garage tonight.”

He looked over at her, again looking surprised but then matched her grin. “I think it’ll be the front porch for me.”

She chuckled. “Smart lady.” After a moment she asked, “What’s up? Why are you out here all alone, hmm?”

“I don’t know,” he muttered, which of course was teenager for, something’s wrong and I’m not sure how to talk about it.

“No?” she prodded, snagging a cracker from the open clear plastic baggy of Cheez-Its crackers, earning a stunned gaze from him. She gave him a shit eating grin as she tossed it into her mouth. She knew that would loosen him up, that sort of ‘unadult’ behavior helping him forget he was talking to an authority figure.

“It’s stupid,” he finally said, turning back to his sandwich.

“If it’s bothering you, Alex,” she said softly, “I assure you, it’s not stupid.”

He was silent so long she didn’t think he was going to respond, but finally he did. “My dad didn’t respond to the picture of my costume I texted him before school.” He wouldn’t look at her after he said it. No doubt he was expecting her to laugh or tell him that it was, in fact, stupid.

“My parents divorced when I was twelve years old,” she said, keeping her tone casual, almost conversational. Stretching her denim-clad legs out straight, she crossed her booted feet at the ankles. She so loved the fact that faculty could wear jeans or a costume on Halloween.

“Really?” he asked, looking over at her.

Nodding, she said, “Yes sir.” She met his gaze. “I haven’t spoken to my mother more than a dozen times since then, Alex.”

His eyes grew huge. “Why?”

“Because it’s not always dads that have demons to face. Do you want to know the biggest lesson I had to learn about her, Alex?” At his nod, she explained, “When a parent, mom or dad,” she added pointedly, “have issues within themselves, their own demons to fight, it’s absolutely not the fault of their children.” She bumped his shoulder. “Children like you.” She gave him an understanding smile. “Sadly, while they’re figuring out what’s gone wrong inside themselves, it can make them super selfish, very focused on themselves and not what, who, they should be focused on.”

He was quiet for a moment, as if absorbing what she’d said. Finally he asked, “Did your mom not call you and stuff?”

“My mom didn’t attend my high school graduation or my college graduation. She didn’t attend my brother’s wedding nor was she there for the birth of his little boy.”

“Wow,” he breathed. “My mom would never miss anything like that.”

“You’re right,” she said with a nod. “She wouldn’t.” She met his gaze and held it. “I know it’s hard, Alex. I know it hurts. Believe me,” she added, “I know. But no matter what your dad does or doesn’t do, you have to truly take in the fact that it’s not your fault. You sending that picture to him this morning of this rather … gory … costume,” she said dramatically, making him smile, “is you sending him love and wanting to share. Him not responding, and maybe he will before the day is over,” she added, “has nothing to do with you. It’s about his own issues right now.”

Again, he grew quiet and looked down at his partially eaten sandwich. Finally, as though he’d come to some sort of understanding or decision, he nodded. “Thanks, Miss Brannon.” He looked at her and gave her a small smile.

“You got it, kid.” She pushed to her feet with a groan. “Getting old sucks,” she muttered, making him laugh. She winked at him then strolled on as she made her circuit of the area during the lunch period. 

 

6.

            “Well, howdy, pardner!” Cori picked up the little cowboy, fixing his hat when she’d accidentally knocked it askew in placing him against her hip. His little legs straddled her side as he grinned at her, little dimples deep and adorable. “How is it that you keep getting more and more cute?” she asked.

“Because it’s my job!” he exclaimed, making her grin.

“Aren’t you too young to have a job?” she retorted. Clearly he wasn’t sure how to respond to that so just smiled broader. Laughing, she left obnoxious eating sounds against his handkerchief-covered neck, making her nephew giggle. “Gonna eat you all up, little man.” One last kiss to his cheek, she lowered little booted feet to the floor of her kitchen. Again, she fixed his hat.

“I’m pretty sure he’s going to lose that thing before the end of the night,” Chris laughed. “It’s a little big for him.”

Nodding, Cori said, “He’s so damn cute.” She finally turned to her sister-in-law, the two women sharing a tight hug before Cori’s brother got in on the action, his hug painful, as usual. “Are you guys keeping it in this neighborhood?” she asked, looking at the parents.

“We’ll see how far he can go before he crashes,” Tyler said, big hands resting on narrow shoulders. “There’s already quite a few kids out there now.”

“Don’t I know it,” Cori laughed, as yet again her doorbell rang. “I’ve already gone through half a bag of candy,” she added as she walked to the door, grabbing the big bowl she had set on a table nearby filled with chocolatey goodness. “And, it’s just barely past dinner time.”

Pulling open the solid wood door, through the glass security door she saw a handful of the little ones, parents either standing back out of the way or holding the hand of their little goblin. As she always was, Cori was charmed and her heart melted.

“So cute!” she exclaimed, carefully pushing the glass door open so nobody got bashed in the head.

A chorus of, “Trick-or-treat!” greeted her followed by, “Cori!”

Blinking a few times, she searched the little faces, most covered in masks, until she saw the culprit. Standing towards the back was a very familiar face who’s hand was held by a woman with an even more familiar face.

Cori looked into blue eyes that looked one-part surprised and one-part amused while yet still one-part embarrassed at little ‘Barbie’s’ outburst.

“Hey, sweet girl!” Cori responded, all smiles to a very excited little Mattel toy, who was being held back by her mother as there were other kids ahead of her.

Cori made quick work of the little witches, pirates, pumpkins and even a bumble bee, before she got to an adorable Barbie, all bedazzled pink with her blonde hair brushed down to a shine around her little shoulders. Arms raised up, Cori leaned down and accepted the hug she was given.

“Hey there, Meghan,” she said, kneeling down to one knee to be on the girl’s eye level. “My goodness!” she exclaimed dramatically. “You sure do make a good Barbie.”

Meghan grinned at her. “Alex is Ken,” she declared.

“Oh yeah?” Cori laughed, glancing up at Michelle, who looked on, clearly amused. Looking back to Meghan, who was nodding vigorously, Cori grabbed a few little wrapped candies. “What do you say?” she asked, an eyebrow quirked.

Meghan held up her little plastic Casper the Friendly Ghost candy receptacle “Trick-or-treat!” she crowed.

Laughing outright, Cori dropped the candy inside to join the rest of the sugary treats that she’d already gotten from other houses.

“Michelle! Hey!”

Confused, Cori got to her feet and saw Chris stepping out of the house around her and she and Michelle sharing a hug. Stepping back, she looked at the two women. “You guys know each other?” she asked.

“Oh yeah,” Chris gushed, glancing to Cori. “Michelle has been my hygienist at my dentist’s office for years.”

Stunned, Cori looked to Michelle, who was nodding in amused agreement. “Well, hot damn,” she chuckled, shaking her head.

“You know Michelle?” Chris asked.

Cori grinned. Boy, do I. “Yeah,” she said. “I teach her son.” She looked back to Michelle. “Looks like you just can’t get rid of me.”

“Indeed,” Michelle drawled, making Cori’s grin grow as they shared a very private smile.

Cori did, however, wonder what Chris saw or thought she saw, because she looked at Cori with a quirked brow and question in her eyes. Cori simply smiled and looked away.

***

            Looking down at the list on her phone again, Cori saw what was next and pushed her shopping cart in the direction of the dairy cases to grab her Greek yogurt and orange juice. Christmas music was piped into the store’s playlist and Cori hummed along to White Christmas as she eyed her selections once reaching the section she needed.

Spotting the brand of orange juice she liked, she pulled open the clear cooler door and was about to reach inside when she glanced through the frosted glass to see a woman step up to the cooler a few doors down. Grabbing her bottle of juice, she allowed the cooler door to slap shut, thoroughly amused.

“Ho, ho, ho,” she said, just loud enough to garner the woman’s attention.

The blonde head whipped around and instantly a smile came to her beautiful face as she retrieved a plastic container of ricotta cheese. “Hey there.” The container was placed in her shopping cart, which was turned in the direction of where Cori stood next to hers. “How are you? Clearly you’ve stopped stalking me, considering it’s been since Halloween that I saw you last.”

Cori grinned. “Yes, well at least seventeen years hasn’t passed, only two months.”

A nervous little smile touched Michelle’s lips and she nodded. “This is true,” she said, both acknowledging what had happened so long ago as it had been brought up for the first time in such blunt terms.

Michelle looked down at her tennis shoes, Cori noting she wore dark green scrubs pants with her winter jacket. Michelle looked shy, almost like a teenager, and Cori was utterly charmed. It reminded her so much of the young woman that long ago Halloween night. The air between grew a bit heavy, though not exactly uncomfortable. Cori decided to get them back to safer topics.

“No kiddos today?” she asked.

“No,” Michelle said with a heavy sigh, meeting her gaze again. “I dropped them off at their dad’s after I got off work.” She gave Cori a sad smile. “He has them for Christmas break this year.”

“Jeez, I’m sorry,” Cori said, easily able to see the other woman was upset, even as she was doing her damndest to put on a brave face. “So,” she said, nodding towards some of the items in Michelle’s buggy. “Gonna make lasagna to pass the time?”

Giving her a sheepish grin, Michelle nodded. “I’m not an emotional eater, but I am an emotional cook.” She laughed, shaking her head. “I know it’s stupid.”

“Not at all. I think cooking can be cathartic, honestly. Baking, too.”

“Exactly. I’m just forcing myself to only get enough to make one pan and not enough to feed the entire neighborhood.” She spared a shy glance at Cori before asking, “Would you like to come over and have some lasagna with me tonight? Well,” she quickly added, “if you don’t already have plans.”

Cori smiled, charmed. “I don’t and I’d love to.”

***

At the appointed time, Cori pulled her car into the driveway of the townhouse that matched the address she’d been given when the two women parted ways at the store. She was nervous, though was trying to calm her nerves with the knowledge that this was simply a casual dinner between what amounted to acquaintances that had a fifteen-year-old boy as a common thread.

What had happened in the past was very much in the past, and it had nothing to do with their present. It had been very obvious that Michelle was upset and, understandably, very lonely during the Christmas holidays without her children. No doubt this was the first time she hadn’t had her kids with her during this festive time. Honestly, Cori couldn’t imagine what the beautiful mother must be feeling.

Cutting the engine, she pulled her key from the ignition and grabbed the boxed pumpkin pie she’d picked up at the grocery store to bring for dessert and climbed out. She noted that the townhouse was nice and in a nice area of town, a handful of blocks away from Cori’s own house.

It was proving to be crazy just how much their lives intersected, outside of how close they lived to one another: Michelle’s son being one of Cori’s students to Cori’s sister-in-law being one of Michelle’s patients at her job.

As she headed up the path to the front porch, she smiled when she saw a cheery Santa Claus on the front door. With the quiet neighborhood, so much like Cori’s own, and the sympatico of their lives, she couldn’t help but wonder if they were supposed to be in each other’s lives. Or, was that simply wishful thinking on her part?

As she climbed the few stairs to the porch, Cori tossed any thoughts outside of simply dinner and good conversation that night out of her mind.

She pushed the lit button for the doorbell, hearing the chimes from inside and then footsteps. A moment later, the door was pulled open and Michelle stood there with a welcoming smile on her face. Like Cori, Michelle had changed from her work clothes to be more comfortable.

Cori thought she looked damned adorable in simple yoga pants and a long sleeve t-shirt. Her hair had been pulled back into a ponytail and her face washed clean of the light makeup she’d had on at the store. Cori absolutely loved that there didn’t seem to be any muss or fuss, just a woman wanting to enjoy some good food with some good company. And, good food was absolutely the case as the place smelled heavenly.

Cori stepped inside, Michelle closing the door behind her. “Holy cow,” she said, taking a deep breath. “Smells so good,” she blew out.

The look on Michelle’s beautiful face was absolute delight. “Good! I made plenty, so you better enjoy. Want me to take that so you can take your jacket off?”

“Sure.” Cori handed her the pie and unzipped the heavy fleece jacket she wore and shrugged out of it to hang it up in the coat closet then followed her hostess to the kitchen.

Feeling like an absolute cad, but Cori couldn’t help it as her gaze fell to Michelle’s gorgeous ass. She watched as it and womanly hips swayed just so as Michelle walked. No longer was she the young woman, just barely out of her teenage years, but instead was a mature woman in her late thirties and a mother, and Cori thought she was truly the sexiest woman she’d ever seen.

Forcing her gaze, and her thoughts, away from Michelle’s body, Cori looked around the living room and into the kitchen. It wasn’t huge, but seemed to be more than enough space for Michelle and the kids. It was very clean and neat, even as it was obvious a teenager and young child lived there.

Just like with Michelle’s casual manner of dress now, Cori loved that there just seemed to be an easy way about the other woman, what you see is what you get. Cori loved that, as she was much the same way. In the kitchen she saw a round wooden table with four chairs, two places already set for the two of them.

“I probably should have asked you before I shot my mouth off,” Michelle said from where she stood at the counter, the boxed pie being set down. “But, will you get in trouble being here? Since you’re Alex’s teacher?”

Cori chuckled. “A wee late for that question. I’m teasing,” she laughed when Michelle looked all-out panicked. “Teasing,” she said again. Shrugging, she said, “Should I be here? No. But, since Alex isn’t, not like I’m hanging out with him outside of class,” she clarified. “I’m not going to freak out about it. And,” she added, “now that school is out for the Christmas break, I just won’t be saying anything.”

Chuckling, Michelle nodded. “Okay, fair enough. I won’t say anything either, nor will I tell him you came for dinner.”

“Then it’s our little secret,” Cori said.

“We seem to be good at keeping those,” Michelle quipped, sparing her a glance before she walked to the oven when the timer beeped.

Turning it off, she tugged on some oven mitts and opened the oven door. A wave of incredible smelling hot air rushed out as Michelle eased the glass baking pan out and onto the stovetop before closing the oven door and turning off the heat on the stove’s control panel.

“Can I ask you something, Cori?” Michelle asked.

Leaning against a counter on the other side of the sink, which put some distance between them, Cori answered, “Sure. Anything.”

“Well, a couple questions, really,” Michelle said. She tugged the mitts off and tossed them to the counter before carefully peeling the foil off that covered the mouth watering lasagna. “Did you know Anastasia?” she asked, sparing a glance over her shoulder at her guest. “Were you guys in some classes together or something?”

Surprised by the question, but Cori was happy to explain. She had a feeling where this was going and honestly, she was fine with it. Obviously, it had never been talked about. Perhaps it was due.

“No,” she said. “I’d never met her. Her college roommate, Priscilla, is my cousin. I guess she sent her to me.”

“Really?” Michelle asked, eyebrows shooting up. “I met Priscilla a few times, but didn’t know her well.”

“I’m actually not close to her,” Cori said with an amused smile. “So, I was confused when she called me. But, strangely enough, Anastasia and I became friends after everything happened,” she said, indicating the two of them. “Still to this day.”

“Wait,” Michelle said, turning to face her. “You’re in contact with her? Now?”

Cori nodded. “We don’t talk often, but sure. Facebook and the random text is sent one way or the other.”

“That’s wild.” Michelle burst into laughter, shaking her head. “She’s been on my mind a lot since …. Well,” She got that adorable shyness about her again. “Since I saw you that day in the classroom.” She shrugged, hugging herself. “We lost contact after I got married and she graduated from college.”

“I’m sorry,” Cori said. “If you want, I can email you her phone number or you can go on my Facebook page and find her in my friends.”

A little smile spread across Michelle’s face. “How about you text me her number.” She indicated her kitchen where they both stood. “I think we’re kinda beyond emails.”

Giving her a devilish grin, Cori smiled. “Okay, what’s your number?” she asked, pulling her phone out of her pocket.

She imputed the number she was given into her contacts then texted the number she had for Anastasia to her. The phone that was resting on the coffee table in the living room chimed with the incoming text.

“Done,” she said with a winning smile, setting her phone aside. She handed Michelle the spatula she was asked for, as it rested closer to her than Michelle. “So,” she said, handing it to the other woman, who used the front edge of it to cut pieces in the lasagna. “what else did you want to know?” Cori walked over to the table and picked up the two dinner plates, carrying them to the stove for easy dishing.

“Thank you,” Michelle said. “Why did Anastasia ask you to … well,” she hedged, again the shy teen peeking her head up.

Not wanting to make the poor woman turn as red as the long sleeve shirt she was wearing, Cori explained. “She told me she thought you were probably a lesbian.”

She paused, wanting to give Michelle plenty of time to smack her, kick her out or absorb. The third option seemed to be what was chosen, as Michelle’s hand stilled in cutting the pieces for a moment. Finally, however, she continued her task.

“She was worried about your upcoming marriage,” Cori continued. She shrugged, even as the other woman wasn’t looking at her from where she stood a couple feet away. “She was hoping that, if in fact you were gay, maybe it would help you figure that out before it was too late.”  

Michelle lifted one of the pieces from the pan and onto a plate, Cori moving that plate out of the way so the second could be filled. “Why did you do it?” she asked at length, glancing over at Cori. “Agree to have sex with me,” she clarified.

Crossing her arms over her chest, Cori leaned back against the counter. “Well,” she said, “I can assure you that wasn’t how I paid for college.” She grinned when Michelle burst into laughter, the tension that had begun to build shattered.

“Take those to the table,” Michelle said through her laughter.

Doing as bade, Cori carried the two dinner plates and set them at the set places.

“I have pop, iced tea or, if you want,” Michelle said from where she stood at the fridge, “I can open a bottle of wine.”

Chewing on her bottom lip as she considered, Cori shrugged. In for a pound. “How about wine?”

With a  nod of finality, Michelle pulled out a bottle and carried it to the counter to open and pour. “So, you were saying?” she prodded, grabbing two wine glasses from a cabinet.

“Yes,” Cori said, walking over to where Michelle was so she could take the glasses once they were filled. “She explained to me what the situation was and why. Honestly, I was stunned she asked me to do it. But, when she explained why.” She met Michelle’s gaze when she looked at her. “I knew all too well how hard it can be when you’re figuring yourself out. I read a billion lesbian novels, anything I could get my hands on. So, yes,” she conceded, “a bit unorthodox, but I wanted to help if I could.” She gave her a devilish grin as she grabbed both filled glasses. “Then when I saw you, oh yeah, I was in.” She hurried away when Michelle playfully swatted at her.

 

7.

            Teasing aside, they got settled at the kitchen table. Cori took a sip of the semi-sweet red, tasting it on her tongue for a moment before she nodded in approval. “Good.” Setting the glass down, she looked at the woman sitting across from her. “Why did you do it?”

Michelle smirked. “The million dollar question, Cori.” She didn’t say anything for a moment as she cut up her piece of lasagna into bite sized pieces then sipped from her wine. Cori wondered if it was for courage, honestly. “I first met Gavin Kasey when I was fifteen years old,” she began.

Cori was surprised at what seemed to be a non sequitur, but gave Michelle her full attention as she began to eat. “So good,” she murmured, lifting her emptied fork.

Michelle’s smile was brilliant. “So glad. Anyway, his family went to the same church we did in those days. It was instant.” She snapped her fingers. “My dad and his dad, twins.” She rolled her eyes. “One is bad enough in the world.” She chuckled at that, Cori smiling. “From that day on, it was the McAvoy’s and the Kasey’s, regardless of what anyone else had to say. It was made clear to me pretty early on that suitors need not apply, as Gavin Kasey was to be ‘the one’. Again,” she said, voice flat, “regardless of what anyone else had to say, including me and Gavin.”

“Gavin didn’t want to get married, either?” Cori asked.

Michelle shook her head. “And honestly, I never blamed him for that part of it. But, as high school went on for me, Gavin already graduated and on his way to college out of state by time I was a junior, I basically just had to cool my heels until he was finished. I graduated and then got a job for a few years. Gee, Dad,” she drawled, “How very nineteen-fifties of you.”

“That’s nuts,” Cori agreed. “Why did Anastasia think you were a lesbian?” she asked, hoping that was a safe question.

Michelle chuckled, chewing the bite of food she’d put in her mouth. Swallowing it down with a sip of wine, she responded. “She knew me better than anyone on the planet, Cori. Clearly,” she added with a rueful smile, “better than I knew myself.” She met Cori’s gaze. “You asked why I did it. Initially it was, fuck you  both, Dad and Gavin,” she clarified, “but then.” A soft smile crossed her lips. “In the immortal words of a woman whom I hope I can call friend,” she said, voice softening a bit, “I saw you and I was in. I was terrified,” she added quickly, “but I was in.”

It was Cori’s turn to feel a bit shy as she returned the smile. “Why did the marriage break up?” she asked.

“I realized once and for all that my father no longer ruled my life and nor did my husband,” Michelle said simply. “Also, and the most important reason, I didn’t want Meghan to grow up thinking that was what a man should be as a husband. And, I didn’t want Alex to grow up to be like him. Between his father and his grandfathers, Alex is inundated with machismo. Alex is a sensitive boy, and I was beginning to see some of the sensitivity crushed beneath the weight of expectation that he could never hope to fulfil.”

Cori just stared at her, in complete awe of this woman. “You’re probably the best mother I’ve ever seen, Michelle,” she said softly. “And I mean that. I’ve seen lots of great moms and not-so-great moms come through my classroom over the years. But you,” she said, nodding, “truly are outstanding.”

The smile of pride that lit up Michelle’s entire face was breathtaking. “Thank you, Cori,” she said softly. “Despite what I may think of Gavin as a husband, father or even just a man, I’ll always be grateful to him for my babies. Always.”

Cori raised her glass. “To your babies.”

Michelle’s grin broadened, raising her glass. “To my babies.”

Clink

***

“So,” Michelle said from where she stood at the sink scrubbing at the lasagna pan. “You haven’t dated or been in a relationship in the five years since Lauren?”

Cori, who was loading the dishwasher after rinsing dishes, shook her head. “Nope.” She placed the final dish. “Soap?”

“Under here.” Michelle stepped aside enough for Cori to open the cabinet door under the sink.

“Pardon me,” Cori said in her cheesiest pick-up line voice.

She chuckled, as they were suddenly very friendly as she reached in to grab the bottle of Cascade, Michelle’s leg mere inches from her hand. Closing the cabinet door, she stood erect and grinned at the other woman, whom she was nearly in kissing distance to before moving away to get the dishwasher started.

“But no,” she continued. “Lauren did a number on me and I guess I just needed time to get me back after that nightmare.” She snorted. “I had to figure out again which way was up, which way was down, left or right.”

“I’m so sorry, Cori,” Michelle said, stepping back to her place in front of the sink. “I truly understand that one.” She turned on the water to rinse off what she’d loosened with a scrubbing pad. “Do you think you’ll give it a shot again at some point?” she asked at length.

Cori considered that question. Funny thing was, a few months ago her answer would have been hell no. She’d have a little fun when the mood struck, but that was it. But, things had changed, and they’d changed huge. Swallowing, she met the other woman’s eyes. “I think it’ll depend,” she said.

“On?”

Resting her hand on the counter, Cori met Michelle’s gaze and held it. “On if we’re both ready for what’s next,” she said simply. Shrugging a shoulder, she added, “Like you said regarding Gavin and your kids, all that. You’ll never do it again, get into something that puts you all in the situation your marriage to Gavin has.” She smiled. “I won’t do another Lauren again, so it has to be right or I just can’t do it again.”

Michelle nodded then looked away as she went back to her glass baking pan. “I understand that,” she said softly.  

Cori was full of so many mixed feelings and needed a little space from Michelle. She rinsed a wash rag and walked to the table to wipe it down. She was insanely attracted to Michelle still, in fact, even more so now. She sensed, just as she had so long ago, that Michelle was likely into women, just had never been given the chance to explore herself.

Now she did. Did Cori want to be on the other end of that? It was different, now. She wasn’t a twenty-three year old young woman just figuring out life and beginning her career. She was a woman of forty, owned her own home and was pushing twenty years in the classroom. She’d built a good life for herself and had a good retirement down the road.

Did she want to be the one for a thirty-eight year old baby dyke to cut her teeth on? And, it wasn’t the issue of Michelle just beginning to find herself a bit later; it happened every single day. It was the fact that the potential of heartache for her was extremely high. And, she had the feeling that, from someone like Michelle, Cori wouldn’t bounce back quickly from that.

“I’m so glad you came tonight, Cori,” Michelle said, pulling the teacher out of her dark thoughts. “I know it was extremely short notice and a bit impulsive on my part, and I’m sorry for that.” She sent Cori a small smile. “But, I really enjoyed your company and,” she added with a laugh, “getting to actually know you.”

Cori chuckled, walking back over to the sink to rinse out the rag from the crumbs she’d gathered. “I guess we did do this a little backwards, didn’t we?”

Michelle snorted. “Just a bit.” She looked to the pan. “Okay, I think I can now wash this thing.”

Cori leaned her hip against the counter and watched, as that was the last thing left as everything else was cleaned up from their incredible dinner and yummy dessert. “Will the kids be with Gavin Christmas day, too?” she asked.

Michelle nodded, though the fact that she tucked her bottom lip in made it clear she was trying to hold in her emotions.

“Do you have somewhere to go for Christmas, Michelle?” she asked gently.

Not looking at Cori as she filled the glass pan with fresh water to build suds, Michelle shrugged a shoulder. “I’ll drop by my parents’ house for a few minutes.” She spared a glance to her guest. “I have no desire to spend a lot of time around my father.” She smirked. “It’s crazy, Cori, since I’ve made up my mind to get away from Gavin, it’s like my patience level for my dad has bottomed out, too. They’re just alike.”

“Do you want to come to my brother’s with me?” Cori offered. “I don’t want you to be alone, Michelle,” she added when she got a surprised look. “Chris will be there too, of course.”

Looking back to her task, Michelle was quiet for a moment and then said, “I’m not sure if I’m real good to be around this year.” Her sigh was very heavy.

“Tell you what,” Cori said. “Do what you want to, be it go see your folks, whatever, and if you’d like to stop by my house after and watch Scrooged and drink some spiked eggnog, I’ll be home by six.” She waited until Michelle looked over at her. “Okay?”

Michelle nodded, “Okay.”

Once Michelle finished with the pan and left it to dry in a strainer next to the sink, the two women walked together to the front door. It was getting late and Cori felt it was time to go, even though if she were honest, she didn’t want to. She loved being around Michelle, loved her company and her energy.

Michelle opened the coat closet and grabbed Cori’s fleece for her. “Are you sure you won’t take the rest of that pie home with you?” she asked, hugging herself when Cori took the jacket from her.

Chuckling, Cori shook her head as she shrugged into the warmth. “I bought one for me, too.”

“Oh, I see,” Michelle teased. She shared Cori’s smile but then grew serious. “I’m so glad you came,” she said.

“I am, too.” Her jacket in place and zipped, Cori held her arms out and quirked her brow playfully.

Grinning, Michelle stepped into the embrace. Cori wrapped her arms around the other woman, eyes closing as she felt her warm softness fully against her. This was literally the first time they’d touched since saying goodbye that Halloween night. And the irony was, this embrace in front of Michelle’s door was an exact replica of their goodbye then, just in front of Cori’s apartment door, instead.

Unlike that first time, however, Cori expected a nice squeeze then to be released. That wasn’t so. Michelle held on, and so did Cori. There was something so perfectly familiar about the feel of this woman in her arms. It was as if the clock stopped ticking by the years and once again they were two women who simply enjoyed being with the other.

In that moment, there was no teacher regulations to worry about, no uncertainties or confusion battling inside Michelle as she was molting from the life of heterosexuality she’d been forced into. It was Cori and Michelle. The hug may have lasted five minutes or it may have lasted a lifetime, as all Cori knew was the woman she held.

She couldn’t help but register the fragrance of the shampoo Michelle used, the smell of her skin and bit of perfume still there from her day. But mostly, she noticed the feel of her and how well their bodies fit together. But then, that was something they’d discovered nearly two decades ago, wasn’t it?

Finally, she gave Michelle a hearty squeeze, which was returned, then released her. They shared a soft smile, Cori feeling so connected to this woman in that moment. “Well,” she said, “I should go.”

Nodding, Michelle stepped away from her, hugging herself. It was as though she had a need to cut herself off physically, thus that connection was also cut off. Cori pulled her keys from her pocket and, with a small wave, she let herself out of the house and into the cold night beyond.

***

“Hey you,” Chris said, grabbing her sister-in-law in a tight hug once she stepped out of her car. The two had met at Auroa Reservoir to get in a jog before the snow came the was predicted for later in the evening. “Ready?”

“I am,” Cori said, the two women beginning their three-mile journey side by side.

The irony was, this had been how Cori had initially met Chris in the first place. They found themselves on the trail at the same time often twelve years ago and eventually just became jogging buddies. Over time, Cori had introduced the cute little brunette to her brother, and that had been that.

“So,” Chris said, once they were in rhythm and making good progress through the cold morning. “Tell me how you know Michelle. Did you guys date at some point or something?”

Cori grinned, knowing damn well this would be coming. Somehow Chris had been able to stop herself from asking since Halloween, and here they were just a few short days to Christmas. Cori had kept Michelle’s secret for all these years and wasn’t about to talk about any specifics now.

“Long time ago,” she said, words heavy puffs of white steam. “We met once.” All true.

“You guys never dated?” Chris pressed. “Seems there’s something there still.”

Cori shrugged. “We met when I was first teaching and she was about to marry Gavin,” she explained. Again, all true. “Just bad timing.” She snorted. “I know I sure as hell wasn’t ready for anything serious at that point.”

Chris spared her a glance, brows raised. “So, are you guys getting something together now?”

Cori didn’t respond for a moment as she, herself wasn’t entirely sure on that one. Well, that is to say, her head wasn’t entirely sure on that one, as it kept throwing logic bombs at where her heart felt it could wander to. She tucked in behind Chris as another runner passed them coming from the other direction before moving back beside her.

“I’m crazy attracted to her,” she finally admitted. “Always have been.”

“I can see why,” Chris responded. “She’s a beautiful woman and equally adorable. Just a real sweetheart. And,” she added, “having her clean my teeth for the past nine years, I think I can say honestly that she’s a really good person. She adores her kids.”

“They adore her right back,” Cori added.

“So,” Chris drawled, “What are you going to do? Ask her out?”

“How can I, Chris?” Cori asked. “Her son is in my class.”

Chris burst into laughter. “He won’t be forever, honey.”

Cori rolled her eyes, knowing better than to put up such a weak argument with Chrstina Brannon, attorney at law.

“The school year is halfway over,” Chris continued. "which will also give Michelle time to deal with Gavin’s bullshit. Maybe by summer,” she added excitedly, “you two can figure this all out.”

“She was married for seventeen years,” Cori pointed out. “To a man.”

“So? I had a girlfriend my first year of law school.”

“What?” Cori exclaimed, then managed to stumble over her own feet at the total shock of that revelation. She caught herself on a tree with her hands before she did a face plant into the winter-yellow grass along the concrete path.

Laughing, Chris went over to her. “Not worth killing yourself over, I assure you,” she said through her mirth.

Cori glared at her, running a hand through her sweaty hair. “Are you serious?” she asked, referring to what had been revealed.

“Absolutely,” the attorney said with a nod.

“What happened?”

Shrugging, Chris let out a steam-coated sigh. “Honestly, I realized that I love women physically, but I’m far more drawn to men.” She scrunched up her nose. “Women are too emotional. I think I’m just too logical,” she laughed.

Amused, Cori shook her head. “All be damned. Never saw that coming.”

“Clearly,” Chris said, patting the tree that one of Cori’s hands still rested against. “Look, Cori,” she said, growing serious. “Something I tried but realized it wasn’t for me, and that’s okay. I think that’s far more common than you realize, honey.” She smiled and lightly squeezed one of Cori’s arms. “Don’t judge Michelle for her marriage to Gavin. I assure you, that doesn’t define her anymore than my relationship with Tammy a billion years ago defines me. And,” she added with a shrug. “I may not know the entire story, but from what she’s said, I suspect Michelle never really wanted that marriage to begin with.”

Cori nodded, knowing that was true from Michelle’s own lips. “That is true.”

“And Cori?” Chris said gently. “Michelle isn’t Lauren.” She gave her a brilliant smile. “Come on, let’s get back to it before I start craving a Krispy Kreme and change my mind about jogging today.”

Amused, Cori nodded and the two got back on the trail.

 

8.

            Wiping sweaty palms on the thighs of her jeans, Cori walked to the front door to answer the knock. Pulling it open, she saw the woman she’d been expecting, so said her text earlier in the day, standing on the front porch, a festively wrapped platter in hands and smile on her face.

“Merry Christmas!” Cori unlocked the glass security door and pushed it open, allowing the other woman to enter.

“Merry Christmas,” Michelle responded, stepping into the entry of the house and out of the way so the front door could be closed, shutting out the cold winter wonderland beyond. She held out her offering, which Cori took. “My mom wrapped this up for you.”

Touched, Cori smiled and looked down at it. “Is it cookies?” she asked, brow quirked. At the nod she got, she pumped a fist next to her side. “Yes!”

Laughing, Michelle unzipped her heavy winter jacket before tugging off her gloves and sticking them in the jacket pockets. “Can I put this somewhere?” she asked, shrugging out of the coat and revealing a gorgeous sapphire-blue sweater that was fitted in all the right places, as well as brought out the beautiful blue in Michelle’s eyes.

“Absolutely.” Cori balanced the platter on one hand and took Michelle’s coat with the other. No coat closet, she hung the jacket on the newel post to the stairs. “Ta da,” she said with a grin. “Come on in.”

“This is really nice, Cori,” Michelle said, following the teacher through the living room, warm fire popping in the fireplace, and into the kitchen.

“Thanks.” Cori set the platter on the cooking island. “I love this house.” She turned to her guest. “Want some coffee? Eggnog?”

“Coffee sounds great.”

A nod of agreement, Cori began to gather what she needed to make a pot. “How did your time go with the folks?” she asked conversationally.

“Okay, I guess,” Michelle said, leaning her forearms onto the butcher block top of the cooking island. “It was awkward without the kids.”

Cori looked over at her in question. “Really?”

Michelle looked down at her hands, fingers fidgeting with each other. “I honestly hadn’t realized just how much of a buffer my kids had become in the relationship with my parents.” She looked up, gaze meeting Cori’s. “So much old hurt regarding my parents,” she explained, “especially my father. I’m not sure those fences can be mended, honestly.” She gave her a sheepish smile. “Sorry. The last two times we’ve seen each other, I’ve been a little down. Not my usual, I assure you.”

Setting the filled glass carafe down on the counter, Cori walked over to Michelle. Taking both of her hands in her own, she met and held that gaze.

“Michelle,” she began softly. “From what you’ve told me, and what I even witnessed in Alex’s behavior this semester, you’ve gone through one of the biggest shakeups in your life, save for marrying Gavin in the first place.”

Nodding, Michelle blew out a breath, her fingers wrapping around those that held them. “Truer words.” She smiled.

Cori returned the smile. “You’re dealing with a lot, both the past and the present hitting you from both sides regarding your relationship with your parents and honestly, Gavin. Then,” she added, “add to that looking ahead to a brand new future that you’re trying to navigate for not just you, but Alex and Meghan, too. And, because of what’s happening, your divorce from Gavin, you’re having to forge new dynamics with pretty much anyone who was part of the, ‘Michelle and Gavin’ life, as just Michelle.”

“Thank you for that, Cori,” Michelle said softly. “I needed to hear that.”

“Of course. And,” Cori added, squeezing the hands she held. “You’ve gotten through the hardest part. The marriage is done. You’re free to figure out what you want for you.” Releasing the soft hands, she went back to making coffee. “So, if you’re up to it,” she said, “I’ve got a great selection of Christmas movies, or if you’re over the whole Christmas thing,” she added, sending Michelle a mischievous grin, “I’m sure we can find something else to watch.”

“Nope,” Michelle said with finality, hand slapping on the butcherblock as if to emphasize her words. “You promised me Scrooged, so I fully expect it.”

Grinning, Cori grabbed two big mugs from her cabinet. “Promise it I did and,” she added with a little side eye, “I always come through on my promises.”

“Indeed,” Michelle murmured, the fire that shone in those beautiful blue eyes for a second singed Cori where she stood.

A little shiver made its way through Cori’s body, nearly taking her breath with it. Nearly fanning herself, she headed to the fridge to grab the creamer and get a little cool down as the filled coffeemaker did its thing.

Everything they’d need carried to the cooking island, she asked, “Cookies now or later?”

“No,” Michelle said brightly, seeming to pull herself out of the somberness she’d been feeling moments ago. “Let’s dig in.”

***

            Ten minutes later, the movie was started and the two women were seated on the couch with coffee mugs in hand. The platter of amazing homemade cookies lay on the coffee table with a pile of napkins.

“Do you mind?” Michelle asked, indicating her boots.

“Hell no! Get comfy, woman,” Cori said, taking a bite of a sugar cookie in the shape of a snowman and decorated as such. Already in her slippers, Cori pushed them off as she, too got comfortable.

Glancing over at her company, and the woman she was beginning to consider a friend, she saw that Michelle seemed to be enjoying the movie, which was Cori’s favorite for the season. She was sipping her coffee and even nibbling on holiday goodness. She was so beautiful, Cori thought.

Despite what was happening in her life and the emotional upheaval, there was something about Michelle that was so calm and calming to be around. There was something about her that made a person want to be with her, wanted to sit in the warmth of heart she exuded and be soothed by it.

Seeming to know she was being watched, Michelle turned her head and met Cori’s gaze. It held for a long moment, something passing between them, and as much as it scared Cori to death, it felt, again that word, familiar. It wasn’t just because it was the same woman, same face and features, same gorgeous eyes, but deeper than that.

The moment was interrupted by Michelle’s phone. The mother nearly starting to attention, she grabbed her phone from where it had been sitting on the end table on her side of the couch.

“It’s Alex,” she said apologetically.

Cori could tell the woman was about to jump out of her skin in excitement to speak to her son, so she simply grabbed the remote control and paused the movie. “You take all the time you want,” she said, pushing up from the couch and heading into the kitchen to give some privacy.

Unable to help herself, Cori smiled when she heard the excitement in Michelle’s voice upon answering the call as Cori left the room.

In the kitchen, she opened the door to the dishwasher and decided to put the clean dishes away. Her intention had been to do it tomorrow morning, but this was as good a time as any. She tried to be quiet, not clanking dishes together. She had no idea if Michelle had been able to talk to her kids that day, but figured she hadn’t from the tone of her voice.

As hard as this had been on Michelle, the adult, Cori couldn’t even imagine how it had been on a five and fifteen year old. For she and Tyler, it had been all too clear how they needed to get away from their mother. So, when their father had moved them out of the house, the first holiday away from their mother had been such a relief. In fact, Cori had felt guilt for feeling that way, but it had been the truth.

This situation wasn’t that. Cori had no idea what Alex’s relationship was like with his father, but Gavin didn’t sound like he was as toxic for the kids as Stephanie Brannon had bene. At least, she certainly hoped not.

Cori was doling out silverware to the appropriate little cubbies in the tray in the silverware drawer when she heard Michelle pad into the room. Glancing over her shoulder at her, she saw a transformed woman.

Gone was the woman who was clearly trying to enjoy her night even as unshed emotions were just under the surface. In her place was a woman who was all smiles and blue eyes that lit up her face and the entire room.

Finishing with her task, Cori hipped the drawer closed and turned to face the woman who was walking up to her. “Did they have a good day?”

Michelle nodded but said nothing more as her arms snaked up around Cori’s shoulders as she pulled her into a hug. Surprised, Cori returned the embrace. As had happened at the end of their night days ago at Michelle’s house, they just sort of melded into each other, the hug warm and full body.

Cori smiled when a little sigh was released into it, warm breath brushing against her neck. She tightened her hold a bit, letting the other woman know she was there and that she was happy for her.

“Thank you for being so understanding,” Michelle said softly, her head resting on Cori’s shoulder. “It would seem that Gavin’s new girlfriend can’t take another week of his kids, so Gavin is sending them back home tomorrow.”

Cori’s smile was devilish since Michelle couldn’t see it. Fucking idiot, she thought. You’ll lose your own kids eventually over some selfish bitch. And in the end, that meant better things for Michelle and honestly, the kids. “I’m so glad,” she said out loud. “I know how badly you’ve missed them, Michelle.”

“I’ve never been away from them for more than the few weekends he’s taken them since the summer,” Michelle said. “Alex said Meghan has really struggled with this.”

“She’s still so little.”

Michelle nodded, everything about her body exuded relief and joy. “I’ll get their beds changed and go get their favorite foods.” She laughed, which made Cori smile. “Spoil them rotten to let them know how badly I’ve missed them.”

“Do you need to go?” Cori asked, keeping her tone supportive, no matter how she was feeling about that.

Michelle pulled away just enough to look into Cori’s face but remained in the embrace. “Absolutely not,” she said. Her smile was beautiful, so at peace. “My babies will be home tomorrow evening, Alex said. Tonight,” she added, fingers lightly combing through short, dark strands. “I’m here with you.” Her smile widened. “Exactly where I want to be.”

To Cori’s stunned surprise, Michelle leaned in. Her lips were so soft as the kiss lingered. There seemed to be no uncertainty nor hesitation from the woman who initiated the kiss. Michelle pulled back just a bit before her lips pressed once again against Cori’s. Though not tentative, this kiss seemed to be about reacquainting, recapturing the spark from a fire that had been lit so long ago.

The voice of fear was yelling in Cori’s head for her to stop and back away, but she just couldn't. And, was that fear merely her own insecurity after what her mother and Lauren had put her through rather than any danger Michelle might pose? She suspected this was the case, but goddamn, she was so scared.

After several wonderful moments of gentle softness, though no tongue, Michelle moved away and looked into Cori’s eyes. “My upbringing tells me I should be sorry,” she began, “but I’m not. There are only two things in my life that were truly my choice, Cori, and one of them was deciding to have my children and the other was you.”

Cori’s eyebrows lifted. “Me?”

Michelle nodded, her hands moving so they rested on Cori’s shoulders. “Being with you that day, giving that to you, not just my virginity and all that, but honestly, I gave you the true me, something I’ve not been able to do since that day until the day I left my marriage. And,” she added softly, “I don’t just mean sex.” She gave her a shy smile. “My kids get the closest I have to me now, Cori. But, I want them to truly understand their mom. Know their mom.”

“What are you saying?” Cori asked, her hands clasping at Michelle’s lower back.

“I will never do anything to get you into trouble at school. I know Alex is in your class right now and that poses ethical danger for you with your job.” Michelle shook her head. “I don’t want that.” She met Cori’s gaze and held it. “What I do want, however, is what I suspect would have happened back then had things been different for me. Had I been older and braver.”

Cori felt her heart begin to race again. “What?” she asked, thinking – hoping? – she knew the answer.

“For you and I to explore more than just the bedroom.” Michelle looked shy and certainly scared, but she was looking Cori full on, as if forcing herself to be the brave woman now she wasn’t then. “Which I also want, Cori,” she said, even as she blushed as she said it. Cori was beyond charmed. “But,” she concluded, “I’m not going to push this on you, me or the fact that I have two children that are with me no matter what. I just ….” She shrugged as she moved away from Cori, hugging herself. “I’m just tired of telling only half-truths because either I had to or didn’t honestly know what the other part of the truth was.”

“Was Anastasia right, Michelle?” Cori asked gently. She needed to know, needed to understand just exactly what she was getting herself into here. “Are you a lesbian?”

“I know I have a lot to learn about myself,” Michelle began, “But, one thing I know for a fact is that I do not want to be with a man, Cori. I never did. I just didn’t know if that was simply me not wanting to be with Gavin or a blanket statement.” She smiled and nodded. “Definitely a blanket statement. So,” she said, shrugging. “If that means I’m a lesbian, then the answer is yes.”

Cori could see it in her eyes, Michelle felt very comfortable saying that. In fact, despite this being an incredibly brave thing for Michelle to do, to admit she wants to pursue, Cori had never seen her be more confident or assured of what she was saying, what she was asking for, even in her moments of shyness.

Everything inside of Cori begged her to say yes, that afraid voice from before silent. Yes, there was school to contend with, but as Chris had said, the schoolyear would end in a matter of months. With a smile, she took a step forward, she brought up her hands and placed them on either side of Michelle’s face.

“Okay,” she whispered against her lips before leaving a soft kiss there. The smile that earned her was beautiful, Cori returning it.

They shared another lingering kiss before they just held each other. Cori’s body was absolutely reacting to this woman, and it did every damn time she laid eyes on her. Even so, she knew this wasn’t the time.

Everything for them had literally begun with sex, and that wasn’t what she wanted, and Michelle had made it clear she didn’t, either. That, she knew, would come in time.

Cori wanted a foundation that was strong enough to build something meaningful upon. Her gut told her Michelle was the right woman for this, always had been. And as that very woman held on to her, her face buried in Cori’s neck and fingers buried in her hair, she could tell that Michelle felt it, too.

“Cori?” Michelle murmured.

“Hmm?”

“Can we still watch Scrooged?”

Cori burst into laughter, looking at a grinning Michelle. “Come on, you,” she said, stealing a quick kiss before taking a soft hand in her own and leading Michelle back to the living room.

 

9.

            Fanning herself, Michelle laughed at her predicament. Her little girl was sound asleep snuggled up against her mom – as she’d been every single night since she’d gotten home from her father’s house a week ago – and Michelle was feeling all sorts of things.  She’d just finished watching her first lesbian movie, this one pretty tame by heat standards, according to a woman she worked with at the dental office.

Michelle wanted all the heat she could get, but with her little one clinging to her like a burr after being away from her, Michelle had opted to stick with whatever she felt comfortable watching with, even sleeping, Meghan around. Michelle also had been given a list of lesbian books to read, and she was plowing through them with every free moment she had.

After her movie night with Cori and the amazing truths told and the kisses, something had switched in Michelle. She’d gone from feeling like a lost girl getting out of a seventeen-year marriage to a mature woman who was coming into her own and taking control of her own life. And, part of that was discovering what it all meant in love and sex and who she innately was.

Reading unbelievably scorching sex scene sin a lesbian novel or watching the beautiful kiss between two women that she’d just watched in the movie certainly was a bonus! But, besides that aspect of it, for Michelle, seeing two women engaged in a romantic relationship and all that went with that, was so comforting to her.

During her marriage to Gavin, she’d always felt like she was a stranger in her own life. And, when it came to having sex with him, it was truly an out of body experience, and not in a good way. He’d never hurt her nor forced her, but there was nothing about being with him or him touching her, that made her feel good, made her feel part of the moment or made her feel like it was what she was supposed to be doing.

Gavin had been unfaithful during much of their marriage, and though it had never hurt, per se, there was part of her that wondered if she’d pushed him into it. Her lack of interest in him or, when they did have sex, she knew it wasn’t all that satisfying for him, either.

Was there ever a reason to cheat? Absolutely not. He should have walked away. But, Michelle was beginning to see her part in things, how she contributed to the breakdown of the marriage. And, as the credits began to roll on the movie, she cuddled her daughter even closer against her.

One of the strange – and positive – byproducts of this awakening and understanding within herself was, she felt so much of her anger and hatred towards Gavin melting away. Yes, he could be a real bastard at times and there were some things he did or said that she’d never forget or forgive him for, but so much of it was lifting off of her.

So much of it didn’t matter anymore because Michelle knew with absolute certainty that the woman she’d been when married to him had been left behind with the big house and the life it had housed, a life that had been largely a fraud from her perspective.

She smiled as she rested her head against Meghan’s. No, that woman was gone, Gavin taking her with him in the divorce settlement to haunt his thoughts or emotions. The Michelle of today was the real Michelle. Only one person had ever seen that woman before today, and that was the woman Michelle was determined to bring fully into her life.

***

Spring was upon them and it was upon them with nice big, fat raindrops dumping on the town. Normally Alex walked or rode his bike to school, but today Michelle worried the poor kid would drown before he ever got there. Pulling in behind the line of cars waiting to drop off students, she looked over at her son.

“Getting shaggy there, mister,” she said, reaching over and running her fingers through his dark hair. “Why don’t we get you in this weekend to get a trim?”

He nodded. “Okay. Do we still have Meghan’s birthday party Saturday?” he asked.

“We do,” she confirmed, pulling the car up a bit as the line moved. Now they were at least getting closer to the large, open area of the front of the school.

“And,” he hedged, “do I still have to go?”

She looked at him with a quirked brow. “Does your little sister turn six every day?”

“According to her, yes,” he muttered.

Michelle burst into laughter, earning a reluctant grin from the teen next to her. “Okay, okay,” she conceded. “So she’s been telling everyone for the last month that it was almost her birthday.” She eased the car up a bit more. “Tell you what,” she said. “I know you and Max want to play that new game he got. You come with me long enough to sing Happy Birthday to her so she knows you were there and you care, and then have Max’s mom pick you up from the play place and you can spend the rest of the day at his house playing if that’s okay with her.” She waited until his wide, excited eyes met hers. “Deal?”

“Totally!”

“Good.” She reached over and slapped his leg. “Get his mom to text me that she’s good with it.”

Alex’s door was pulled open, surprising them both. A grinning Cori looked at them from beneath the hood of a rain slicker. “Mornin’!”

“You startled me, Miss Brannon,” Alex laughed.

“That’s part of my job, lad,” the teacher said, stepping aside to allow him exit. “That and tests.”

He laughed then turned to Michelle. “Later, Mom.”

“Later,” she responded, knowing she’d never get a hug in front of his teacher. “Love you!” she called after him as he jetted out into the storm and towards the building.

“Tsk tsk,” Cori said, watching him go before she turned to look back at Michelle. She gave her a blinding smile. “Good morrow, M’lady,” she said.

Michelle chuckled. “You’re in a fine mood this morning.”

Cori wiggled her eyebrows playfully.

“Do I want to know?” Michelle asked, quirking one of her own.

“You already do,” Cori said, getting ready to close the car door. “You were there,” she said sweetly, then slammed the door shut.

“You are so not nice,” Michelle muttered, unable to keep the saucy little smile off her lips as she watched the teacher head to the next car, clearly on morning duty.

The two women hadn’t spent any real time together since Christmas as they’d made a pact to get through this semester and Alex through Cori’s class before really starting anything. Michelle wholeheartedly believed in this decision as she’d do nothing to get Cori in trouble or put her job in peril. But lord, it was hard!

They’d kept in contact over texting, but even that wasn’t as much as either of them would want, and of course, mornings like this where they saw each other at the school. The truth of the matter was, Michelle missed her terribly. Since Cori had come back into her life so incredibly unexpectedly last fall, Michelle felt that had been when the change inside had truly begun to move into hyperdrive.

Leaving Gavin in the first place had turned on the engine, but Cori …. Well, she’d forced Michelle to hit the gas and grow and evolve in a way she’d never done before. And, as much as she genuinely wanted to get her life going, exploring what they could possibly have, Michelle knew this time alone was good for her. So much she needed to do for herself while she was alone, nobody else to depend on or lean on.

And damn it, she was so proud of the progress she’d made. She wished so badly this had all happened twenty years ago and she’d known who she was and had the strength to stand up to her father and tell him no. But, then she had to remember, if she had, Alex and Meghan wouldn’t be in her life and frankly, neither would Cori.

So, in the end, perhaps things happened exactly as they were supposed to.

***

“Happy birthday, tooooooooooo youuuuuuu!”

Meghan was nearly vibrating out of her pink and purple pants and t-shirt with excitement as the chorus of rather bad singing came to an end. Her cherubic features were painted by the flames from the six candles on her birthday cake placed before her on the table she sat before.

“Make a wish, sweetie,” Audrey exclaimed to her one and only granddaughter.

With a dramatic intake of air, the adorable little girl blew like she was putting out a bonfire. When all six little flames were extinguished, she looked up at the applauding group of adults and kids like she’d just completed performing her first open heart surgery.

Michelle, who stood behind her daughter, leaned down and hugged her big girl and left obnoxious kisses to her cheek. “Good job, sweet girl,’ she said before she began to help grandma pick out the candles.

“Mom,” Alex said, walking up to her where they were gathered in the ‘party section’ of the indoor play place. “Max and his mom are here.” He held up his phone to show the text from his best friend.

“Okay,” Michelle said. “And,” she added, eyeing him. “You have your overnight bag?”

He nodded, patting the backpack he shouldered.

“Okay. Let Meghan know you’re leaving,” Michelle said. She took him in a hug and left a kiss to his cheek before moving out of the way.

She watched as her son gave his little sister a big hug and wished her happy birthday again before he jetted out for overnight fun of junk food and video games at Max’s house. She watched him go, so proud of him and knowing she’d miss him that night, but was truly happy for him. After the very rough start at the beginning of the schoolyear, Alex had buckled down and improved all his grades and had even made some new friends in their new neighborhood.

It was moments like this, seeing how both of her children were thriving that reminded Michelle that she’d absolutely done the right thing. For all of them.

“Hey.”

Attention pulled out of her thoughts, Michelle was stunned to see Cori walking up to her, a brightly wrapped package in her hands. “Hey,” she responded, unable to keep the smile off her lips. “What are you doing here?”

“That one,” Cori said, pointing an accusing finger at Chris, who had been invited along with Aiden, “invited me. Sorry I’m a little late. I’d already promised to help my dad this morning.”

Amused, Michelle placed a hand to her hip. “Oh?” She looked to her long time patient, only to see Chris giving her a shit-eating grin in return. Looking back to a chuckling Cori, Michelle said, “Why do I think we’ve been set up?”

“Because Chris is an asshole,” Cori said, whispering the last word since they were surrounded by children.

Michelle burst into laughter, taking the offered gift. “Thank you. Well, welcome.”

***

“Mommy?” Meghan murmured as Michelle removed her shoes, the little one lying in her princess bed.

“Yes, sweetheart?” Michelle responded quietly, the only light in the bedroom coming from the hallway and the My Little Pony nightlight next to Meghan’s dresser. Michelle removed the shoes and set them aside before removing her daughter’s colorful pants.

“I’m six,” Meghan said, her smile revealing where she’d lost her first tooth two weeks before.

Michelle returned the smile. “Yes you are, my big girl.” Pants tossed aside, Michelle grabbed her daughter’s hands and helped her sit up so she could remove her shirt. “Do you want to wear the new nightgown Grandma and Grandpa gave you for your birthday?”

At the vigorous nod she got, Michelle grabbed the adorable garment and helped her daughter put it on before getting her tucked into bed. It had been a long day filled with fun, attention, play and lots and lots of pizza and cake. She knew Meghan would crash hard and sleep throughout the night.

“I love you, my big six year old birthday girl,” she whispered as she leaned over the grinning little girl. Leaving a kiss to her forehead, she moved away. “I love you, baby.”

“I love you too, Mommy,” Meghan said, her big blue eyes already growing heavy.

Michelle picked up the discarded clothing and tossed them into the hamper before she left the bedroom, easing the door shut behind her. She heard the front door closing downstairs so headed in that direction. On the couch had been stacked all of the puzzles, toys and clothing Meghan had gotten for her big day.

“Thanks so much for bringing all that in, Cori,” she said to the woman who was placing the last of it – an adorable stuffed unicorn – on the pile.

“Absolutely.” Hands on hips, Cori looked it all over before looking back to Michelle. “Kid made out like a bandit,” she chuckled.

“And,” Michelle added, “she’s out like a light.”

“Hey now, she played hard!”

Grinning, Michelle walked over to the other woman. “So did you. How you managed to fit into that ball pit, I will never know.”

“It’s fun to let my big kid out to play now and then. Besides,” she added, “with Aiden, I’ve learned all sorts of new ways over the years to be as big of a dork as I possibly can to make him giggle.”

“You’re incredible with kids.” Unable to help herself, Michelle snaked her arms up around Cori’s shoulders, fingers playing in the short hair at the back of Cori’s head. It was so soft as her fingers ran through it. She smiled when hands clasped at her lower back, pulling her lightly against the warm softness of Cori’s body. “I’m so glad you were there today,” she said. “I really wanted to invite you, but I was trying to be a good girl.”

Cori grinned. “Clearly I failed in my self control.” She grew serious. “I hope you weren’t mad that I accepted Chris’ invite.”

“No,” Michelle said, shaking her head. “I was so happy to see you.” She chewed on her bottom lip for a moment, not sure if she should say what she wanted to. Finally, she decided her days of not speaking her truth were over. “I’ve really missed you, Cori.”

Bringing a hand up, Cori gently caressed Michelle’s cheek with her fingertips. “I’ve missed you, too.” She smiled. “It doesn’t help when you keep popping up in my dreams.”

“Oops,” Michelle murmured.

Cori quirked an eyebrow. “Yeah, oops.”

Without permission of her brain, Michelle leaned in. The kiss was so soft, just as she remembered from three months before. This time, however, of its own accord, it deepened. It was still slow and measured, but the first touch of Cori’s tongue against her own put another block into place for Michelle, building the foundation of the woman she was always meant to be.

She sighed into the kiss when Cori’s hands moved to her hips, pulling them even tighter together. The feel of Cori’s hips against her own, her breasts against her own and the growing passion between them, was absolutely sending a fire of need racing through Michelle. She had never felt such a desire fill her, such a demanding need that she knew wasn’t going away or even would ease until it was addressed.

The kiss broke, leaving them both breathing hard. Looking into Cori’s face, Michelle saw that same need in her eyes and flushed features. Making the most important decision of this new facet of her life and herself, Michelle asked softly, “Will you stay?” 

 

10.

            Cori looked into Michelle’s eyes, making sure she was ready for this. Everything told her she was, and though they were in late March, Cori knew there were still a couple months left in the school year. Even so, she knew it was time. The connection between them was so strong and she knew they could keep this under wraps for eight more weeks.

Yes, she thought. It was time. Nodding, she said, “Okay.”

Michelle took Cori’s hand in hers and, after making sure the front door was locked and lights were turned off, she led her up the stairs and to her bedroom.  

Like the rest of the townhouse that Cori had seen, the bedroom was small but clean and neat. None of that mattered as she focused on the woman that was once again facing her. It amazed her, the difference in this woman, even from just a month ago, let alone since last fall.

The woman before her now seemed to be filled with a confidence Cori had never seen in her. She was a woman in control of her own life and exuded purpose and a sense of self that was deeply sexy but it also made Cori’s heart smile.

She knew how badly Michelle had wanted to truly be herself, even as she wasn’t fully sure what and who that was. Now, as once again they began to kiss, Cori could tell Michelle was a woman reborn and comfortable in her own skin.

Other than getting through the next couple of months until the school year was finished, all of Cori’s doubts and worries faded. She knew now that Michelle knew what she wanted, and more than that, was ready to have what she wanted, and it wasn’t about one night. And, as she buried her fingers in Cori’s hair as the kiss deepened, Cori knew she’d fight for her, fight for what she suspected they could have.

Cori cupped a gorgeous ass covered in denim and used it as leverage to pull Michelle closer against her. Michelle sighed in response as her hands slid out of Cori’s hair and down her back. Those hands slipped up under the layers of Cori’s long sleeve t-shirt covered by a regular tee and to the skin of her back.

It was Cori’s turn to sigh, as it felt so damn good to be touched, and more so to be touched by Michelle again. She was, however, surprised when those hands moved down and out, only to grab the hem of the garments and pull them upward.

Cori pulled out of the kiss and raised her arms until the shirts, pulled up together, were up and off. An intense and hungry gaze took in her bra-clad breasts. Cori felt like she was about to be eaten alive and honestly, it made her burn even hotter.

Michelle’s fingers were surprisingly gentle, almost reverent, as they traced the shape of Cori’s breasts before they followed the strap around to her back. “Let’s see if I can do this,” Michelle said with a grin.

Amused, Cori stood still as she felt the fingers fumble a bit but finally the clasps of the bra unsnapped and the ends fell away. She shrugged out of the straps, allowing the bra to fall to her feet. The garment was lightly kicked over to land on her shirts as those hungry eyes returned to what had been revealed.

With a look of absolute wonder on her face, Michelle cupped Cori’s breasts, again her touch gentle even as it was so evident how much she wanted this. Cori wanted to grab Michelle and rip her clothes off of her before devouring her. But, she forced herself to let Michelle find her footing.

Yes, she may be a different woman than she’d been before, but this was all still new to her. And, if Cori were honest with herself, she, too wanted to savor this first time back together. This time had so much meaning to it and she wanted to experience every single second of Michelle’s wonder and exploration.

Eyes falling closed, Cori’s heart lurched when Michelle lowered her head and slowly swiped her tongue over one of Cori’s nipples. She cupped the back of Michelle’s head, the long, soft blonde hair running between her fingers like spun gold.

A sigh escaped her lips when that nipple was sucked into a hot mouth, Michelle clearly growing more comfortable in what she was doing.

“Baby?” Cori managed after several moments.

“Hmm?” Michelle murmured around her task, making Cori smile.

“My knees are going to buckle. I need to lay down.”

Chuckling around Cori’s breast, Michelle finally released it and raised her head. “Sorry.”

She stole a quick kiss then stepped away from her. As if in silent agreement, they undressed themselves and then Michelle pulled the covers back on her bed. Climbing in, she reached for Cori, who followed.

They both moaned as Cori moved on top of Michelle, their nakedness pressing together. For the first time, it was just them, no favors to a friend, rebellion from a stifling situation or even a strap-on dildo. This was purely about want, need and choice. It was about the next step in what they both wanted for themselves and their respective lives.

That sense of familiar was strong, yet again. And, yet again, it had nothing to do with the fact that it was the same woman, but that feeling at a deeper level, a soul level. Michelle’s was an energy that Cori’s heart recognized and had been craving for so long.

Now, as they kissed, Cori’s heart was nearly crying for joy, starved for so long of what it had known it needed since that Halloween night nearly half a lifetime ago.

Leaving Michelle’s mouth, Cori moved to explore her neck, needing to taste and kiss every inch of her. Michelle’s head moved to give her access, her fingers burying themselves in Cori’s hair, urging her into her exploration.

Cori’s hand ran down along Michelle’s side, thumb brushing a hard nipple on the way until it continued down until it reached Michelle’s hip. It continued past that until it reached the side of her thigh. Cupping it, she urged the leg to bend at the knee, which it did. This opened her up to Cori, who moaned at just how wet Michelle was as Cori’s mouth reached her left breast.

A little whimper drifted over Cori, making her burn even hotter for the woman she was making love to. They both were very aware a little girl was asleep just down the hall, and this would definitely be forced will to not just yell out the joy of being back together. But in Cori’s mind, it was so worth it. And, as she could tell Michelle was keeping her own noises and verbal responses somewhat reserved, clearly the mother of two felt the same way.

Cori reached the other breast as her fingernails trailed along the thigh that rested against her hip, smiling when she felt a little shiver travel through Michelle’s body. She moaned in approval, yet again noting how responsive Michelle’s body was. Cori had always loved that about her.

And, as she left the second breast and began to kiss her way south, she was very excited to taste Michelle for the first time. She wanted to see just exactly how responsive she was to such an intimate kiss. No clue if she’d experienced it before or not, she sure as hell hadn’t from a woman, and that was unlike anything Michelle had experienced, Cori knew that for fact.

She smiled as it seemed to hit what was about to happen as Michelle gasped and her thighs fell open a bit more, almost like her body was inviting her in. Cori wasn’t even sure Michelle was aware how her body was responding.

Getting the feeling that Michelle was going to be quite the tiger, Cori wrapped her arms around her thighs and held them open as she lowered her mouth. They both moaned together at the first slow swipe of Cori’s tongue through Michelle’s immense wetness. Cori loved how wet she got, how unbelievably swollen and ready she was.

Fingers wove themselves into Cori’s hair as her mouth worked, tongue and lips, teasing, testing, worshiping. The most wonderful sounds were escaping Michelle’s lips, her hips rolling with the waves of her pleasure.

Looking up the length of her body, Cori thought it was the sexiest thing she’d ever seen, to see Michelle in such rapture. And, as Cori sucked her into her mouth, Michelle’s back arched and she gasped.

Focusing fully on what she was doing again, Cori intensified her attentions, as she could tell Michelle was getting close. She tightened her hold on spread thighs before she initiated her attack, ruthless with her tongue. Michelle did not disappoint, her response immediate and dramatic as her fingers began to pulse in Cori’s hair and her breasts heaved as her breathing increased.

Moans and whimpers were growing higher pitched and constant as her body readied for release. Her hips jerked and, as if of its own accord, one of Michelle’s arms shot out as her hand grabbed a pillow and shoved it over her own face as she cried out long and loud, muffled beneath the cover of the pillow.

Cori didn’t release her, continuing her ministrations until a second shudder raced through Michelle’s body. Growling with satisfaction, she released her prize and left a kiss in volcanic heat before she climbed her way back up. She left little kisses and licks on Michelle’s gorgeous body along the way.

The pillow was tossed aside and she grinned down at the woman who was still clearly trying to get hold of herself. Michelle’s eyes were unfocused and she was still trying to catch her breath. Leaving a kiss to her forehead, Cori moved off of her and reclined on her side next to her. She used gentle touches and kisses to help bring Michelle back to the land of the living.

Finally, a long, slow breath left Michelle’s lips and her eyes focused as she looked over at Cori. “My goodness,” she whispered.

Cori grinned. “Welcome back.” She leaned down and left a kiss to Michelle’s lips, moaning in approval when the back of her head was cupped and the kiss was deepened.

When Cori felt herself being pushed to her back, she went easily, Michelle following until she lay atop her. Cori’s hands slid up the smoothness of Michelle’s back until she trailed back down with her fingernails, that wonderful little shiver passing through the woman atop her again.

She absolutely loved Michelle’s mouth. Her lips were so soft, her passion on full display even as the kissing remained measured yet deeply sensual. Oh yes, Cori thought. This was no longer an inexperienced girl. This was a woman whom, despite never being with a woman since their first time together, knew what she was doing.

Michelle seemed to have a wonderful self-awareness and a keen reading of Cori’s body and her need.

Moving out of the kiss, Michelle began to explore, something she hadn’t done the last time, even though it had been very obvious she had been curious. The timidity was gone as Michelle’s mouth explored Cori’s neck, nipping playfully as she moved on.

It didn’t take long for her to find Cori’s breasts, her excitement palpable as she moaned into her task. Cori was in serious need of release, but to watch Michelle – again, that wonder on her face – was so beautiful. To know that Michelle was where she truly wanted to be, with whom she truly wanted to be with, was so amazing. Wanting to give her that time, that first real taste of freedom, Cori did her best to turn off her body’s desperate pleas.

Moving to the other breast, one of Michelle’s hands wandered down to the immense heat and wetness between Cori’s thighs. She lifted her head just enough to look into Cori’s hooded eyes. “Teach me.”

Nodding, Cori took that hand and moved it between her spreading thighs. She placed two fingers where she needed them to be, Michelle gasping.

“So hard,” she whispered, again that wonder on her beautiful face and in her tone. “So wet.”

Using Michelle’s own fingers, Cori showed her what she needed her to do. It took a moment, but then Michelle got the idea. She lifted her head fully from Cori’s breast and braced herself on her other forearm as she watched her fingers between Cori’s legs.

Cori used her hips to help guide in speed and then, once Michelle really got it, Cori’s head slammed into the pillow and her eyes closed as her lips fell open. Her breathing was increasing as her excitement did then, without a warning, her orgasm crashed over her.

She bared her teeth and squeezed her eyes shut as she desperately tried to keep the sound down even as she was screaming her pleasure in her own head. Her whole body jerked as Michelle didn’t stop and a second wave hit her.

This time, her thighs slapped shut, trapping Michelle’s hand where it was. She was trying to get herself back under control, and she smiled at the soft kisses all over her face she was getting until they finally landed on her lips. She responded as best she could, hearing a little chuckle as she was struggling to even do that.

Finally, she took a long, deep breath and slowly released it. Opening her eyes, she looked into the beautiful face of the woman leaning over her. Michelle looked rather proud of herself, and Cori loved it. Bringing up a hand, she tucked golden strands behind an ear before raising her head and leaving a soft kiss to even softer lips.

Head resting back on the pillow, Cori couldn’t get enough of that face and the serenity in gorgeous blue eyes. “So?” she asked. “Does the jury have a verdict?”

Michelle’s smile was so beautiful. “Yeah,” she said, leaving another kiss. “I am never, ever, ever letting another man touch me ever, ever again.”

Grinning, Cori asked, “What about a woman?” When Michelle shook her head, Cori’s eyebrows shot up. “No?”

“Nope.” Another kiss. “Not just ‘a woman’.” Another kiss. “You.” Another kiss. “Only you.”

Cori was pretty sure her face was about to break in half from the smile those soft words garnered. “We still have a couple months before we can do this, you know.”

“Well,” Michelle hedged. “I kinda think we already did it.”

Cori burst into laughter, a hand flying up to slap over her mouth, muffling her mirth even as Michelle’s smile grew. Still chuckling, she removed her hand, though tweaked one of Michelle’s nipples as her hand fell back to the bed. “Yes, yes we did.”

They shared a wonderful kiss, warm, loving and that of two deeply connected women. When it ended naturally, Michelle moved until she could cuddle in beside Cori, head resting on her shoulder. Cori held her, nearly purring in contentment. Growing serious, Michelle spoke.

“I know we still have to wait until Alex is out of your class,” she said, hand resting against Cori’s opposite side to which Michelle’s body was cuddled up against. “It gives me time to talk to him and Meghan. Not sure how much she’ll understand, but I definitely want to talk to Alex.”

“How do you think he’ll take everything?”

“Strangely, I don’t think he’ll have an issue with my being a lesbian. He’s such a laid back kid and I know at heart he just wants me to be happy. He was old enough to remember how bad things were with his dad. As for us,” she added, lightly slapping Cori’s side, “I’m not sure. I think it’ll take time, but I know he really likes you and Meghan seems to adore you.” She chuckled.

Cori smiled, running her fingers through Michelle’s hair, loving how soft it was. “Oh, it’s reciprocated, let me assure you.” She saw that little girl’s face in her mind’s eye and nearly swooned. She’d never had the urge to have children before, outside of her kids at school and her brother’s son. But now …..

“Are you okay to do this with my kids, Cori?” Michelle asked softly, a bit of worry in her voice. “We’re a package deal.”

“Hey,” Cori said, urging Michelle to look at her. When she did, she smiled, hoping that her heart shone in that smile. “I want this. All of this. I am fully and totally aware that means you, Alex and Meghan.” She tucked blonde strands behind Michelle’s ear. “I don’t want to cause any problems with them, though. If you don’t think they, or Alex mostly, being older, can handle this, or you think it’ll cause problems between you and him, tell me.” She shook her head. “I won’t do that to you. Or him.”

“Cori,” Michelle said, voice very serious. “This is who I am. Even if you weren’t in the picture, I’d never be with another man. I know that now.” She caressed Cori’s face with her fingers. “Alex would have to get used to this fact no matter what.” She shook her head. “I love my son with all I am, but I will never deny myself, my true self, for anyone ever again. Including Alex. Or,” she added, “even Meghan once she’s older. All that said, I’m lucky enough to have found you again. I never forgot you, Cori. And though I know I’m a lesbian, a whole new world for me, I want that world to be you.” She left a kiss to Cori’s lips. “Okay?”

“Okay,” Cori said. Her smile spread across her lips, unable to help it. “I’m in.”

 

Epilogue

            The air was so clean and clear with the smell of pine trees and camp fires. The fifth wheel, pop up trailer and tents had been set up in the three spaces the two families had reserved for the long Labor Day weekend and their annual camping trip.

Cori leaned a shoulder against one of those pine trees and her arms were crossed over her chest. She looked on, a smile upon her lips that basically hadn’t left those lips in more than three years.

The specific source of this particular smile, however, was watching her own brother standing on the banks of the lake next to the nineteen-year-old young man who he’d become increasingly close to and very much the father figure that the young man’s own father refused to be.

Tyler had been there when Alex had questions about what X meant or why Y happened. He’d been there to teach him how to shave and he’d been there to teach him how to tie his bowtie for prom and necktie for his in-person interview to the college he wanted to attend. And, as they were doing at the moment, he’d taught him how to fish.

Looking further down the shore, Cori watched as the two nine-year-old ‘cousins’ and best friends played. Meghan’s high-pitched giggle at whatever Aiden was doing made Cori’s smile grow. She knew that with the noise they were making, likely Alex and Tyler wouldn’t be catching anything. But, she also knew that wasn’t really the point, was it?

For all these years, Tyler had used this “guy time” for Alex to open up about whatever he needed to talk about or needed advice on. They all knew this, and when Chris darted over to the two men to leave them both with an ice cold can of Coke and a playful swat to her husband’s behind, she quickly left to let Tyler work his magic.

This time, Cori knew, was girl talk. Alex had talked a lot to his “moms” about it, the girl he liked at his work study job at the college. Cori and Michelle had given him their thoughts from the perspective of the girl. Now, well, now it was Tyler’s turn to tell him what a man would do.

Her smile grew when she felt arms snake around her waist from behind. Immediately, she leaned back against the woman who pressed against her, chin resting on Cori’s shoulder. Their fingers laced where they rested against Cori’s stomach.

“How goes it?” Michelle asked, meaning the chat between the men.

“I think Alex is leaning towards asking her out.”

“You don’t say,” Michelle teased, considering she and Cori knew damn well that’s what he wanted to do.

Cori grinned. “Hey now,” she said, turning her head to look at the woman she shared her heart, her life and, since two years ago, her home with. “It’s a big deal garnering the courage to ask out the girl of your dreams.”

“Don’t I know it,” Michelle snorted, making Cori’s smile grow.

They shared a soft kiss. “And yet,” she murmured, looking deeply into the blue eyes she loved waking up to every single morning. “You managed to invite me over for lasagna.”

“Bet your gorgeous ass I did,” Michelle murmured. They shared a smile and another kiss before returning their focus to the two men at the shore. “I love you, baby,” Michelle murmured, resting her head against Cori’s.

“I love you too. With all my heart.”

“Five bucks Alex asks her out by Halloween.”

“You’re on.”  

 

The End.

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