Flashback
By Gabrielle Goldsby
Hurt Comfort Disclaimer: Yep that’s in here.
Sequel Disclaimer: These characters were initially created as part of a 1000 word challenge entitled Paybacks. It may be necessary to read Paybacks and Paybacks Too to fully enjoy this story.
Positive and constructive feedback will be greatly appreciated. Let me know if you want to hear the rest of their story.
I tried not to get excited when I heard her voice. The fact that my heart was now blocking my throat probably made me sound gruffer than usual. "I want to see you." There was silence on the other end of the line.
"Cameron? I thought you said two weeks?"
"Yeah, are you busy?" I plopped down on the bed and closed my eyes to wait for the answer.
"No, no I’m not. I’m glad you called." She said.
"I told you I would, didn’t I?"
"Uh no, you didn’t really say. I would like to see you too."
"I’m at the Pan Pacific. How soon can you get here?" I wonder if she can hear me smiling?
"I don’t know. I need to make a phone call. Can you… will you give me two hours?"
"I only have tonight, Mac!" I was unable to keep the frustration out of my voice. What I wanted to say was; it’s Valentines Day and thanks to those windbags at work, it’s almost over.
"I know. I’m sorry...I don’t have any choice."
"Okay, give your name at the front desk. I’ll have a key waiting for you." I disconnected before she could change her mind, and then dialed room service.
"Hi, this is room 129. Cancel the lobster. Just bring up the salad, a few crackers and some fruit or something. Yes, and the champaign ...strawberries will be fine. Wait, do you ...can you dip them in chocolate? Yes, that would be fine. "
I hung up the phone and went into the bathroom to shut off the faucet. I couldn’t deny the disappointment I felt. What the hell was I thinking? This was Mackenzie Bryant, the one person I could safely say that I’d once hated. And now here I was ordering lobster dinners and running bubble baths. Why, because it’s Valentines Day? The idea of Mackenzie Bryant being my valentine was laughable. Wasn’t it? I dropped my robe and stepped into the tub. Eyes closed, I sank low letting the hot water warm my muscles. God, she had looked so damn luscious when I had watched her through the window. I don’t know what had possessed me but I’d had to see her. My intention had been to watch her as she worked in the nursery and then move on. I hadn’t even realized it when I had dialed her number. Hell, when had I committed her phone number to memory? And when I saw her…. She had looked tired and sweaty.
"So damn good." I murmured. How come I don’t remember her looking that good in high school? Probably because she was always out to kick my scrawny ass. The thought made me chuckle, but Mac was right, she had never hurt me. She had definitely scared me a few times. Even wrinkled a few shirts, but not much more than that. Why am I making excuses for her? I remembered how she had looked lying on that couch, legs spread. I was damn near pressed up against the window and I didn’t give a damn if someone came and caught me. I could not, would not tear my eyes away from her. How I had wished for a different angle. I could hardly see what her hand was doing from where I stood, but I could see her face and I could see her movements slow when I asked her to. I could hear the soft shift of her breathing as the cell phone seemed to heat along with the air around me. I watched her body tense as she released. My lips parted as if to respond to her soft moan and my fingers had itched to touch her when she closed her legs around her own hand.
I took a deep breath and opened my eyes wide. I needed to stop thinking about her all the time. I sank down under the water, came back up and yawned. I’d had to take two planes to get here only to see her for a few hours. I would have to leave on a six o’clock flight if I expected to make it to Oregon in time for my meeting. I winced. Maybe I should have waited another week. I lay down on the bed and hit my pillow. "Who the hell am I kidding? There will be no other weeks." This was it. I told myself I would see her one more time, and then I would leave her alone. I was acting crazy over something that had happened ten years before.
God, but she’d looked so good on that couch. If I had thought I could make love to her and still make it back in time I would have come through that window. But it was impossible, so I had watched; staring at her like a perv at a peep show and my dreams were now haunted for it. I looked at the clock. Two hours she had said. I’ll take a nap. When she gets here I’ll be well rested.
* * *
I heard her tentative steps as she reached the door. She paused as if she had forgotten something and I heard her slide the card in the lock. For some reason I felt the need to let her think I was still sleeping. She stood above me for a long moment before she spoke.
"Cameron?"
"Mac," I opened my eyes and looked over at the clock. I had been asleep for nearly three and a half hours.
"I’m sorry I’m late. I.…" I waited but she just shook her head.
"What’s the matter, Mac? Your husband didn’t want you to go out on Valentines Day?" I hated the fact that underneath the teasing I really wanted to know. I really cared whether she was available or not. I ran my hand up her arm. She looked great in black pants and a sleeveless blouse, very little make up and a light scent that I couldn’t quite place. I sat up, causing the sheet to slip past my breasts and pool in my lap. Our eyes battled momentarily before hers surrendered.
"I’ve never been married." She said.
"I know."
"How could you know that? Did you have me checked out?"
The drastic change in her tone caused me to frown. "So what if I did? You going to leave, Mac?"
"No…. No I’m not."
"Then what difference does it make?"
I hadn’t had her checked out. But if I’d wanted to, I damn well could have.
"I guess it doesn’t make any difference," she said.
"What are you hiding from me, Mac?" I teased.
Her reaction was anything but playful. "What the fuck do you care?" She growled. "I’m here so you can fuck me. Remember? That’s all you want, isn’t it? Then what the hell do you care if I’m married or hiding something? You want to fuck me, then fuck me and stop…stop acting like you give a shit."
I lunged off the bed and grabbed Mac by the shoulders. The need to silence her burned nearly as hot as the need to show her how much her words hurt. My fingers entangled in her hair as I brought her face close to mine. "Is this what you want, Mac?" The kiss, meant to punish, only intensified my need for her. As we fell onto the bed my lips moved to her throat. "Fine, I can do that. If you like that shirt you better take it off now." She removed the shirt and tossed it on the floor. We were both angry and neither of us had any idea why. I should have stopped it then and sent her home. But I didn’t.
Her nipples hardened beneath my hands as I pressed hard between her legs with my thigh. She struggled to kick her shoes off and I began to claw at the closure of her pants. As the clasp gave way, my hand slipped down the front of her pants and immediately sank into her warmth. "Oh," I whispered inexplicably and froze. My eyes drifted shut and I rested my moist forehead on her shoulder.
"Cameron." She gasped.
Mac’s breathing increased and her movements became desperate as I began to slowly stroke the enlarged evidence of her arousal. Part of me wanted to make her wait; to make her pay for those heated words. I’m here so you can fuck me. Remember?
A gasp escaped her lips as her movements increased. Her pants were now almost down around her thighs. I did not enter her, even though I could tell that’s what she wanted. I increased my rhythm and she bit her bottom lip. I tried to ignore my own arousal as I handled hers roughly "fucking her is all I want." I told myself.
"Ca…Cameron." She breathed my name as she came. I closed my eyes as her body quivered beneath my insistent fingers and I leaned down and whispered into her ear.
"It’s not...what I wanted."
She sighed and I reached up and turned the light off.
To my surprise she let me pull her close and I closed my eyes. She would be gone in a few hours and I wouldn’t call her again. When had I become so damn petty? When had I started wanting her to the point of distraction? I knew exactly when it had all started; when teasing had turned into something else, and my anger had turned into frustration.
* * *
That’s mine." The locker room amplified the fear in my voice. I had left my yearbook sitting on a bench and had rushed back to retrieve it before it was stolen. I could not describe the feelings that coursed through my body when I saw Mackenzie Bryant’s dark head bent over my book as she scrawled something inside its pages.
At first she looked like a small child that had been caught scribbling on the wall with a favorite crayon. Guilt soon changed to anger and she was up off the bench and walking toward me, the book held out in front of her. "This? This is yours?"
I couldn’t help it. I took a step backward.
There was a soft smile on her face and I was tempted to look around to see if anyone else was in the locker room, but I knew we were alone. No one else would be in here until the next class ended. Once again I had allowed myself to be caught alone with Mackenzie.
"Don’t you want your yearbook?" The taunt was evident in her voice as she held it just far enough away from me so that my snatching it and running like hell was not an option.
I reached out and grasped the edge of the book and after gauging her reaction; I started to take it from her. "Th…Thank you." I said and even managed a smile as I clasped the yearbook close to my chest like a suit of armor. I was certain I was home free. I had already taken a step backward and was about to hightail it out of there, only Mackenzie seemed to have had other ideas. I don’t even remember seeing her reach for it, but suddenly the back of her hand was just under my chin as she snagged my yearbook in a hold so powerful it would have been useless to try to rip it free. Just let her keep it, dumb ass. My mind screamed and I even went so far as to nod slightly in acknowledgement but my fingers refused to let go. I felt like crying at their betrayal.
"Wait a minute. How do I know this is yours?"
"My name is in it," My voice, high and whinny, was tossed right back at me by the stone walls and floor of the locker room.
She pulled the book from my useless fingers as I continued to back away from her.
"I need to talk to you. Where are you going? " Her head was tilted as she asked the question, her eyes strangely kind.
I panicked. "You can have it. I don’t want it."
Suddenly her anger was back, and I was kicking myself for even speaking. In two long strides Mackenzie had not only closed the gap between us, but she had my shirt gripped tightly in her fists and was pushing me into the shower stalls. I hit the back wall with a soft thud and closed my eyes. I waited for some kind of blow but none came.
I cautiously opened my eyes. The anger that I had seen only moments before was now gone.
"Don’t wear this shirt anymore." She said.
"I…but why? My mother bought…."
"I don’t give a shit who bought it for you. Don’t wear it."
"Okay, I won’t." I pressed my head back against the wall. My stomach churned as Mackenzie’s fist twisted tighter in my shirt. She seemed to be fixating on something and when I looked down, I noticed my nipples were painfully evident beneath my bra. Heat crept past my neck and settled on my cheeks.
"I’m sorry," she said softly. I felt my mouth open out of habit to tell her that it was okay. Only I froze, because this wasn’t somebody who had just bumped into me in the halls. This was the person who made my heart thud every time she looked at me; who made it just a little harder to get up and come to this hellhole every morning. And now she thought she could just say sorry and that would be the end of it? I pressed my lips tightly together and looked down at the ground.
"Hey?" Her voice sounded entirely too close and my anger disappeared as quickly as it had flared. Whatever she was smoking was bound to wear off and I would still be in danger of a serious ass kicking.
"Yeah?"
"I said I was sorry about the shirt, ok?" Out of the corner of my eye I saw her hand move up again and I closed my eyes waiting for the punch to come. A warm pressure settled over my chest right above my breast causing me to open my eyes. I stared incredulously at the ragged nails on the surprisingly feminine hands. She bites them, I thought to myself. What the hell could ever make Mackenzie Bryant nervous enough to bite her nails? The thought was so intriguing that it took me a moment to notice that her hand was gently smoothing my shirt with a back and forth motion just above my chest. My breathing calmed.
"You want people to look at you in this shirt, right?" She asked as she methodically and ineffectually smoothed the wrinkles that she had created. The question was almost thoughtful, as if she were trying to make sense of something.
"What? No." Ok, I understood now. She’s nuts and no one even knows I’m in here with her. I leaned as far away from her as could. Ok, what is it they do in the movies? Keep them talking, right? "I don’t want anyone to…" She took a deep shuddering breath and finally looked up at me. The eyes that I had expected to be cold and piercing looked confused and perhaps even scared. Had I ever looked at them before? I shook my head wondering why, when I was about to get my ass kicked, was I wondering if I had ever noticed my abusers eyes. Maybe she wasn’t the crazy one after all.
"What do you want from me?" I mumbled. The smoothing stopped suddenly and I braved a peek at her face. She towered over me and to look at her eyes would require a lot more bravery than I was capable of. But I saw enough to know that her lips pressed so tightly together that a white ring was starting to appear around them, and her face was at least a shade darker than it usually was. What the hell had I done this time?
"Do you have a boyfriend?"
"No. You know I don’t." I blurted. The incredulity sneaked out in my voice before I could stop it.
"No? That’s not what I heard."
Relief flooded into my stomach, soothing the nervous quall as it dawned on me what this was all about. "Do you...you mean Eddie? He isn’t my boyfriend he.... is he yours?" Eddie Fletcher had, on a dare, as I found out later, kissed me. I remember trying to wrench my mouth away from breath that was a mix of Pal Mal cigarettes and watermelon Hubba Bubba bubble gum.
She looked like she was about to laugh then and shook her head. I thought she was about to let me go but she just smiled. My eyes went to her lips because it seemed so foreign to see her smile. I looked up to see if the smile reached her eyes. I flushed and her long lashes swept down as if to hide the fact that her eyes had left her exposed.
Her hand was under my chin and though she didn’t really use any pressure, I did look back up at her." Why did you let him kiss you then?" she asked.
"I didn’t let him…I hated it. I pushed him off me."
"Hmm, he told me you liked it. That you wanted him to."
"Yeah, like I really want to be kissed in front of everyone by that shit for brains." I said then I sobered up quickly. It wasn’t the first time my mouth had gotten me into trouble.
"Good because he won’t be doing it again. I told him if he did he would be walking funny for the rest of his life." She studied my face for a minute and then nodded as if it had told her something. I was still confused. Was she my protector now or had I misinterpreted her interest in Eddie. "He said…he said you are a good kisser."
"I don’t …he did?" I hadn’t been expecting that. A demand for money perhaps, but not that I was a good kisser. I was still feeling a little off balanced, a little unsure about what I could and could not say, so I didn’t risk opening my mouth.
"Um hmm. Yeah, he did."
"Oh."
"I didn’t believe him, though. I told him he wouldn’t know a good kisser if he bought one." I couldn’t seem to be able to form any words. "I thought I would give it a try. You know, just to see what all the hoopla was about."
She stared at me as if she expected me to speak. I did part my lips and even managed to wet them, but that was about the extent of my input. She suddenly bent her knees and when she came up our lips where locked. I could feel my glasses slide down on my nose and perspiration broke out on my constantly moist forehead. Her grip loosened on my shirt as the kiss deepened and everything else stood still. I felt something graze my breast through the silk shirt. Oh God, was it her hand? Surely this was a test. She would stop soon, laugh at me and tell everyone what a perv I was, right? I put my hand up to her chest to push her away and stopped in shock. For some reason I expected her to be hard, all muscle, and she was but she was soft too. Why couldn’t I seem to open my eyes? Something tightened in my stomach and spread lower. The feeling wasn’t foreign to me. I already knew how much pressure and just where to touch myself in order to bring myself the maximum pleasure. Almost as if she heard me, Mackenzie eased her leg between mine and pressed into me.
"Okay?" She breathed the question close to my ear as she finally let me up for air. Her fingers grazed the front of my shirt again. For the second time in as many days I was being forced into a kiss. Only this time, this time to my embarrassment, I liked it. I sagged against her and nodded. I couldn’t look at her for fear I would see her laughing at me, so I just closed my eyes and waited for her next move. The lips that covered mine this time had none of the force of the other kiss. It was surprisingly tentative, almost as if she was now afraid I would send her away.
I felt the gentle pressure as she opened her mouth further and to my utter shock her tongue slipped into my mouth, toying with my tongue and making me grateful for the wall behind me. She wasn’t teasing me, she couldn’t be. This had to be more, didn’t it? I shivered and Mackenzie’s breathing quickened as the kiss grew more demanding. The air from her nose tickled mine. I started to feel like I would faint if I didn’t get some air soon. She finally released me and I forced my eyes open.
"You’re supposed to breath through your nose." She said not unkindly, and I nodded my head like a lunatic.
Her eyes were searching my face. She seemed to be waiting for some kind of response and as was my habit, I obliged lamely. "What…what are you doing?" My tongue felt like she had lulled it to sleep with her kiss.
She continued to stare at me, her eyes filled with something that I had noticed coming from her since school first started. She was still disdainful toward me, that hadn’t changed. But there was something else as well.
"What do you think I’m doing, hmm?" She moved forward again and kissed me. "Hmm? What does it feel like I’m doing?"
It felt like she had just stolen the air from my lungs. I wanted to ask her why she had kissed me like that. Why had she stopped? I felt it when the tears prickled the back of my eyes and my kiss numbed lips parted as if to say "oh no" before the first tear dropped down my cheek.
"Why, why are you crying? I didn’t …" suddenly her body was no longer pressing me into the wall and I felt equal parts relief and disappointment. It took me a minute to figure out why she wasn’t there anymore.
Mrs. Graves, my second period gym teacher, had Mackenzie by her upper arm hustling her out of the shower stalls and toward the door. She was almost as tall as Mackenzie and twice as wide. "I’ve had it with you, Mackenzie Bryant." She said as she pushed Mackenzie in front of her. I hurried after them trying to catch my breath enough to tell Mrs. Graves she had made a mistake.
"Cameron? Cameron. Wait damn it." Mackenzie tried to brace herself in the door her eyes begging for something.
"Mrs. Graves, please," I called out. "You don’t understand…" I stopped, my breath caught in my throat. What was I about to tell her? That I had enjoyed the kiss? That I had wanted what was happening? How could I tell her that? How could I tell anyone? I looked at Mackenzie and covered my mouth. What did she want me to say?
Mackenzie had been staring at me for what seemed like years, her eyes pleading just like they had been in the shower room. What did she want from me? Mrs. Graves forcefully pried her fingers from the door jams. A twisting smile appeared on her face and her eyes closed off from me.
"It’s been fun, Cameron." Her voice had taken on that gruff, tough guy edge that had always made me cringe as Mrs. Graves hustled her out of the door and toward the administration office.
I followed them, still unable to say anything. Three times Mackenzie was able to get Mrs. Graves to slow down enough so that she could glance back. And each time she did, her eyes grew colder as she realized that I wasn’t going to say anything. Mrs. Graves pulled the heavy door to the office open and pushed Mackenzie into the room. "Go to class, Cameron. I’ll take care of this one."
I watched as the door slid closed slowly. Something in me wanted it to slam so that I could at least be finally released from whatever spell Mackenzie Bryant had over me. But it didn’t. It quietly clicked closed. And, as if in a dream, I simply turned around and did as I was told. I went to class.
By the time lunch rolled around I think everyone had heard that I was the one responsible for getting Mackenzie Bryant expelled. I got tired of seeing the looks of utter pity on so many faces and tried to ignore them. The school day seems far too short when you’re worried about what will be waiting for you when you get out. I was positive Mackenzie would be waiting to kick my ass as soon as I left the building. Why couldn’t I have admitted that she hadn’t been beating me and we had in fact been…well that’s just it, isn’t it, Cameron? You’re not quite sure what you were doing. I dragged into the lunchroom and sat my tray down wearily. I felt eyes on my back and closed my eyes, mentally kicking myself for not eating on the lawn.
A tray was slammed down on either side of me. Eddie, of the bad breath and the sloppy kisses, and Lisa, the one girl Mackenzie tolerated, sat down next to me. I stared down into my plate waiting for the verbal abuse. I didn’t have to wait long.
"Nice going, skank." Lisa flicked her hair over her shoulder hitting me square in the mouth, as well as leaving blonde strands on my fork full of pasta. I discreetly placed the tainted food on the corner of my plate and opened a new Spork and napkin.
"Yeah, way to get Mackenzie expelled," Eddie, the consummate follower, chimed in.
"I didn’t." I mumbled.
"Uh huh. Well who did? I didn’t, did you, Eddie?"
"Nope, seems to me that I heard the skank did."
"Whatever," I said under my breath.
"Did you say something?" I looked up and then back down at my food
"No."
"What? I didn’t hear you."
"I said no. Now leave me alone."
"Sure, I’ll leave you alone." Lisa started taking her food off her tray and arranging it neatly on the table. I chewed on my chicken nasty and sipped my milk from the tiny straw.
"Oh Eddie, would you mind putting my tray up for me?" I never saw it coming. Perhaps I should have, but I was too busy trying to shrink into myself. The back of Lisa’s tray slammed into my nose. I blinked, blinded by pain and shock, and sucked air in through my mouth. I grabbed hold of the table as tears flooded from my eyes and my nose started running. I tried to sniff but pain, sharp and probing, caused me to close my eyes again.
"Now, look I didn’t mean to get her expelled. I tried to tell Mrs. Graves…"
I stopped speaking as a genuine look of horror passed over Lisa’s face. This was about the time I tasted the brassy tang of liquid that could only be blood.
"Oh shit, you fucked her nose up!" Eddie got to his feet and started backing away from me as if I were Carrie at the prom. I put my hand up and jerked it away as pain hit my face and shot straight to the back of my head. I looked down at the blood on my hand, unsure who’s it was. Then everything went black. I found out later that I had fallen backward, banging my head on the floor and had to be rushed to the hospital to get three stitches and a bandage for my broken nose. Oh yeah, and I also got two lovely black eyes out of that deal too.
When I made it back to school they said the whole thing was blamed on Mackenzie Bryant. They said that it was some kind of payback for my having gotten her expelled. Lisa and Eddie were suspended and when they came back they avoided me like the plague, which was fine by me. It would be ten years before I saw Mackenzie again.
But only a month before I had my first dream of making love to her.
* * *
I closed my eyes and put my hand over my forehead. All of the other things Mac had done to me were starting to fade, and this seemed the most prevalent. Was I starting to see it differently now because we had made love? No Cameron, don’t start fooling yourself now. You had sex. But the look in her eyes had been so…
I turned on my side and put my hand on her stomach. Mac started, as if from a dream, and turned toward me.
"What’s the matter?"
"I’m ticklish there." She said.
"You are?" I couldn’t help it, my fingers started for Mac’s stomach again. She flopped over, her hair spilling onto the pillow as she turned to grin at me. "You’re not ever going to give me a break are you, Cameron?" she teased. I stared down at her for a moment, not returning her smile. Hers slowly disappeared.
"What’s wrong?" she asked with a hint of fear in her voice.
"Nothing. I just…I was wondering why I never noticed how expressive your eyes were."
Mac smiled, "I always wore sunglasses, remember."
"I thought it was because you were so cool."
Mac shrugged and turned on her side, allowing the sheet to fall to her waist. "I was that too. I was a lot of things when I was a kid. I was very mixed up."
"Your sexuality?"
Mac nodded, her fingers tentatively going to my arm and grazing the muscles there. "Even before I knew I was a lesbian, I never saw myself as the white picket fence type."
"Um, now that I think about it, I never saw you like that either." We smiled at each other and she looked away first. Well I’ll be damned. I thought as I waited for her to look back up at me. She’s shy. We just rutted around like two wild pigs and she is shy. I reached down and lifted her chin. She looked up and smiled a smile that was reflected in her eyes and resulted in an answering pull right between my breastbones.
I leaned forward and kissed her. Gently I opened my mouth and she obediently opened hers as well. Her hands grazed my nipples through the sheet. Even though they could of just as easily gone under the covers, they stayed above them tormenting me. As a soft groan swam up from my throat, the words I remember this kiss screamed loudly in my brain. Almost as if she heard me, with a hand on the small of my back, Mac turned me over until she was lying on top of me, her hair spilling over her shoulders and onto the pillow beside me.
"Ok?" She said the word as if it took all the effort she had. Her breath was low and husky. I remember this voice too.
I nodded and this time I answered as well. "Ok." Her mouth came down in a kiss so soul wrenchingly gentle that I knew that this is what we could of had a long time ago. This is how our first time together should have been but it wasn’t. I held her for a long time rubbing her back, neither of us moving. I kissed her shoulders and ran my fingertips over the goose flesh that immediately appeared there. "Mac?"
"Shhh." She whispered and kissed me again. I immediately quieted as Mackenzie eased one leg out from between mine. She closed soft lips around my nipple, tugging lightly before starting a gentle suction that was soon causing me to rub myself against her. She didn’t allow it for long, her arms encircled my waist and I closed my eyes as she moved to the next nipple. Her movements were slow and methodical and I thought I was going to die before she worked her way past my chest. A century later she lay nestled between my legs. A tear rolled down my cheek and I buried my hands in her hair, urging her to finish what she had started before I finished it for her. The lips that kissed me were gentle, almost too much so. I wanted a quick and hard release before I was driven crazy. What I got was slow and gentle, and it was killing me.
"Mac please, I can’t wait."
" I know." She said and gently drew my clitoris between her lips. And in the same exact way that she had suckled my breast, she tenderly ministered to my clitoris. I moaned at the wonderful torture and was unprepared for the first wave of the orgasm. It was deep and pulling. It started in one place and ended with my whole body feeling like one giant contraction. Mac continued to hold me prisoner with her soft lips and persistent tongue that never moved past gentle and never once rushed.
She ceased her movements and lay quietly with her cheek resting on my hip until my breathing calmed. "Cameron, are you tired?" The question would have been funny if there hadn’t been that note in her voice. That same note of pleading that haunted me for years longer than it should have. Why was it still there even after we had made love?
"No." I said softly, my hands going to her shoulders to pull her up for a kiss.
"That’s not, that’s not what I mean." She said but allowed me to pull her up and kiss her. I love the taste of me on her lips.
"What do you want, sweetheart? Just tell me." I said softly. I could feel myself getting aroused by all the possibilities. Already I had the fleeting thought that I should be worried that my desire for Mackenzie was still just as strong as it had been the first night.
"I want to feel you this time." She said, her lips inches from mine.
"Feel me?" I asked dumbly, not comprehending what she meant.
She inched her lips closer to mine this time and gave a slight nod of her head. "I’ll show you, ok?"
A large hand ran down my side and rested on my hip. Mackenzie eased one leg over mine and with her other moved my legs apart. The fingers maneuvering my clitoris were just firm enough that I was instantly thinking about a release again. And when they dipped into my opening, I wasn’t surprised when warmth and wetness was what they found. I groaned, already nearing orgasm when they embalmed my clitoris with my own arousal. This happened twice before I realized that Mackenzie was slowly going deeper and deeper into me with each pass and I was accommodating her by opening my legs wide and pulling hard on her shoulders. I bit the bottom of my lip and I felt Mackenzie’s body stiffen. "Am I hurting you?" She asked. "Should I stop?"
"No. No, you feel good."
"So do you." She smiled shakily. "I would like to feel you when you come. Would that be ok?"
"Yes." I nodded and she resumed her movement. The slow deep thrusting, like her earlier ministrations, felt maddening pleasurable. I found myself trying to lengthen the time she was inside me by counter acting her thrusts with movements of my own. Mac seemed unbothered by my strategy and easily kept pace with me. I could hear her breathing increase. I opened my eyes to make sure she was ok and was shocked to see that she was staring down at me. Her eyes, filled with both pleasure and hunger, are what sent me over the edge. My hands went up to her face and with my eyes wide open and her fingers deep inside of me, I met the orgasm with a hoarse scream. I almost missed Mac calling my name as her eyes slowly slid shut and she sank deep inside of me. I pulled her close, inexplicably sensing that she needed comforting even though I was the one having the orgasm.
For a moment Mac seemed to crush me into the bed and I welcomed the solidness of her. She lifted her head and said, "I dreamed of doing that for a long time."
I smoothed the hair back from her damp forehead and whispered. "So have I."
Mac moved her head back slightly and a small, confused smile toyed at her lips before fading into incredulity. "For real?" She said and I nodded.
"Mac…I. Do you think I’ve fucked this whole thing up, or is there a chance we can start over?"
"Start over?" She repeated.
I nodded. "If you’re willing, I’m willing to let go of some things and try to. Look, I don’t know what we have, but for some reason it’s lasted through ten years of misconceptions and well…I don’t know, I just think there might be something worth…"
"Worth checking into?" She teased and I nodded. "So no more paybacks then?"
"Hmm, I wouldn’t say that. I sort of liked the paybacks part." I teased as I went in for a kiss.
She smiled and kissed me back. "Are you sure?"
"I’m sure." I said. "And for what it’s worth, I’m sorry."
"So am I, but not for this, never for this. I have to tell you something, Cameron."
"What is it?"
"Today was going to be the last day that I saw you." I stiffened. For some reason, the fact that she was going to break things off, hurt. Never mind the fact that I had been planning on doing the very same thing.
I lay back down. "I can’t say as I blame you. Things weren’t exactly healthy."
"No, no they weren’t. I’ve changed in a lot of ways. I’m not the same person I was ten years ago. And as sorry as I am for what went down between us, I can’t keep apologizing for it."
I nodded. "I don’t think I want you to anyway."
"Good." Mac sat up and swung her legs over the bed. "I have to go.
"So early?" I squeaked and instantly felt anger well up inside of me. I had let the tides turn. I was the one that was supposed to be leaving. Not her.
"You have a plane to catch. Remember?"
I glanced at the clock. "Oh shit." I said as I leapt out of the bed and started hunting around for, and then tossing all of my clothes into the open suitcase in the corner.
"Cameron?"
"Hmm?" I said absently.
"You have time for a shower?"
I looked back at her and smiled. "Uh huh." I said as I dropped the nightshirt on the floor, already mentally deciding that if I rented a car I could drive down to Oregon in about 10 hours.
© 2003 Gabrielle Golsby