SUMMARY:
When something happens to make Xena lose control, can Xena and Gabrielle find a way to fix her before it's too late?
The day was young and the sky was clear. The songs of the birds overhead could be heard, as they flew by on their way to where ever the fates would lead them. Below, Xena sat resting up against a tree with the gentle smile on her face. As she watched Gabrielle while she peacefully slept beside her. Just enjoying the calm of the moment. She reached over and gently brushed Gabrielle's hair. Gabrielle sleepily opened her eyes and smiled, seeing Xena.
GABRIELLE
Hey.
XENA
Sorry, I didn't mean to wake you.
Gabrielle sat up.
GABRIELLE
It's okay. I can think of worse things to wake up to
Xena smiled, giving Gabrielle a soft kiss on her forehead as she stood up.
XENA
Since you're up, we might as well get moving.
GABRIELLE
Get up and get going huh.
XENA
(joking tone) Well if you wanna stay here all day, I could always come back for you later.
Gabrielle got to her feet.
GABRIELLE
Funny.
They packed up camp and headed out. The two of them traveled along until they came to a small village. As they were riding by one of the villagers came out from the village gate, and ran up to them.
VILLAGER
You're Xena right.
XENA
Yes?
VILLAGER
Thank the gods your here.
GABRIELLE
What's going on?
The villager explained that his village was about to be attacked and all of their guards and fighters had mysteriously disappeared.
GABRIELLE
Any idea where they could have gone?
VILLAGER
No. A few days ago they just vanished without a trace. We sent a search party to find them. But they came back with nothing.
Gabrielle looked at Xena.
GABRIELLE
What do you wanna do Xena?
XENA
First we set up defenses around the village. Then Gabrielle, you'll stay here and help defend with the villagers.
GABRIELLE
What are you gonna do?
XENA
I'm gonna go find the villagers that went missing.
GABRIELLE
Do you think the two are connected?
XENA
Not sure. But I wouldn't be surprised.
With that Xena and Gabrielle entered the village and got to work, getting the village ready to defend against the raiders that would soon be upon them. When the preparations were just about complete, Xena made her way to the village gate to go look for the missing villagers. Gabrielle followed to see her off.
XENA
I told the villagers you're in command and to follow your lead.
GABRIELLE
Okay, I'll take care of things here.
XENA
Stay safe, I'll be back soon.
Xena gave Gabrielle a light kiss. Then she turned and set off to find the villagers. Gabrielle watched for a bit as Xena rode away. Then she got back to work helping the villagers get ready for the attack. Xena rode along, looking for any clues that could lead her to the missing villagers. Or what could have happened to them. During her search, Xena came across a cave. As she got closer, she could hear voices coming from inside. Xena got down from her horse and cautiously entered the cave. She made her way through the cave, following the sound of the voices. Then up ahead she saw light coming from behind a curtain. Xena crept up and peered behind the curtain. Looking in, she saw a group of cloaked people. They appeared to be some sort of occult. As she continued scouting, Xena spotted the villagers she was looking for. She could tell things were not going to end well for them if she didn't intervene. But before she had the chance to come up with a plan, one of the cloaked people walked over to the cell holding the frightened villagers. They dragged one of the villagers out forced them onto an ulter. The cultists began doing some sort of chant. With a sience of urgency Xena jumped into action. She threw her chakrum, striking the ulter. Causing a distraction. And disrupting their ritual. Then Xena let out her battle cry as she lept into the room. She landed beside the ulter, catching her chakrum as it ricocheted back to her. The cultists turned towards Xena.
CULTISTS
What is this? What are you doing here?
XENA
You took some people from a nearby village. I'm here to take them back.
CULTISTS
Sorry, but we have plans for these people. So we'll just be keeping them. And now that you've discovered us. I'm afraid you'll be joining them.
Xena drew her sword.
XENA
Thanks for the invitation, but I think I'll pass.
CULTISTS
Oh my dear, you don't have a choice.
The cultists leader motioned, sending his people to attack Xena. Xena began fighting them off. As she fought she got to the holding cell and got the door open. She told the villagers to flee. They ran out of the cave and back towards the village. Xena noticed one of the villagers was still on the ulter. The cultists leader was standing over them reciting his chant. She saw him take something from his cloak. Xena quickly ran, getting between the cultists leader and the villager. He gave Xena a sinister smile. Then he threw some sort of liquid into Xena's face.
XENA
GAH!
Xena staggered back trying to wipe the burning sensation from her eyes. After a few moments, though her eyes were still stinging, Xena regained her sight. She looked around for the cultists, but they had all vanished. She spit. Some of the liquid had gone in her mouth as well. She noticed a bit had also landed on the ground. Xena knelt down to investigate the liquid. Nothing abnormal stood out to her.
XENA
(thinking to herself) Must just be used to blind. Allowing him to escape.
With no way of knowing where the cultists went, Xena headed back to the village. Once Xena and the rescued villagers returned, they were greeted by Gabrielle and rest of the villagers.
GABRIELLE
Xena. You're back.
XENA
Yea. How did things go here?
GABRIELLE
Good, we chased off the raiders without any casualties. And only a few minor injuries.
XENA
Nice work.
Xena rubbed her still irritated eyes.
GABRIELLE
You okay?
XENA
Yeah.
Xena didn't feel the need to tell Gabrielle about the liquid that had caused the irritation. She thought it would only serve to worry Gabrielle and she didn't think that was necessary.
XENA
I think some dust just in my eyes.
Xena excused herself and went to rinse out her eyes. Afterwards, with the burning in her eyes releaved, she returned. The villagers thanked both Xena and Gabrielle. Then the two of them headed out on the road again. They walked for awhile as Gabrielle curiously questioned Xena about the events of the day. Xena just gave her short, nondetailed answers. Gabrielle walked a little ahead as she chatted with Xena.
GABRIELLE
So what do you think they were trying to do with the villagers?
XENA
Don't know.
GABRIELLE
Wounder where they went.
XENA
Don't know.
Gabrielle was starting to think Xena wasn't really listening to anything she was saying.
GABRIELLE
Why did the chicken cross the road?
XENA
(smirking) To get away from your endless questions.
Gabrielle looked back at her and smiled, shaking her head.
GABRIELLE
Good one, Xena. You got me.
Gabrielle turned back as they kept walking. She continued idlely chatting with Xena for a bit.
GABRIELLE
So where are we going now Xena?
XENA
....
GABRIELLE
Xena?
Gabrielle looked back towards Xena. Then she saw Xena laying on the ground unconscious.
GABRIELLE
Xena!
Gabrielle ran back to her.
GABRIELLE
Xena what happened? Come on wake up. Xena! Xena!!
×××
Gabrielle knelt beside Xena as she tried to wake her.
GABRIELLE
Xena. Xena wake up.
Gabrielle shook her a little.
GABRIELLE
What's wrong? Come on Xena, this isn't funny. Get up.
She lightly tapped Xena's face.
GABRIELLE
Xena?
Gabrielle put her head to Xena's chest, listening for a heart beat. It was fine. She saw Xena was still breathing too.
GABRIELLE
What's going on?
Gabrielle looked around for help. No one else was around. Then in the distance she saw a small house.
GABRIELLE
Hold on Xena, I'll go find help.
Gabrielle stood up and began racing towards the house.
XENA
Where are you running off to?
Gabrielle turned around to see Xena getting back to her feet. She jogged back over to her.
GABRIELLE
What happened? One minute your fine. Then I turn around and your just laying in the middle of the road.
XENA
I don't know. Last thing I remember was you talking my ear off. Then the next thing I know I'm waking up on the ground.
GABRIELLE
Are you okay?
XENA
Yeah I think so.
Gabrielle held Xena's face, concerned. Trying to see if she could spot anything wrong. Xena took Gabrielle's hands in hers, feeling her worry.
XENA
I'm alright Gabrielle. Really. It's probably just a little fatigue. Nothing a good night's rest won't fix.
GABRIELLE
You passed out seemingly out of nowhere. Nice try Xena, but I'm not buying the whole "I'm just tired" story.
She knew she had no choice but to tell Gabrielle about the liquid she had ingested.
GABRIELLE
Xena what if that was some sort of poison? You don't know what it could do to you. Why would you keep something like that from me?
Xena placed her hands on Gabrielle's shoulders.
XENA
I'm sorry, I didn't want to worry you.
GABRIELLE
(sarcasm) Well you did a real good job with that.
XENA
I know. Come on, let's get going.
GABRIELLE
Are you sure you're okay?
XENA
I'm okay, I promise.
Gabrielle reluctantly gave in and they kept moving. They continued on, making their way to the nearest city. Once inside, they walked around browsing the shops. Xena hung back a bit, just watching as Gabrielle visited a couple stalls. When she done getting the few things they needed, Gabrielle returned with the items.
XENA
All set?
GABRIELLE
Yeah I think I got everything. Hey how 'bout we get something to eat.
XENA
Sounds good, I was thinking the same thing.
Xena and Gabrielle headed to the tavern to get some dinner. They got their food and sat at a table by themselves. As they ate, a few of the locals came over to the table. They had clearly been drinking.
MAN 1
Hey there, what's a couple of pretty ladies doing sitting all by themselves.
Xena glanced up at him.
XENA
Not interested.
The other man approached Gabrielle.
MAN 2
How 'bout you cutie?
GABRIELLE
Sorry, what she said.
One of the men pulled up a chair and sat at their table beside Gabrielle. The other next to Xena. Gabrielle rolled her eyes.
GABRIELLE
This is kind of a two person table.
MAN 1
Come on don't be like that. We just wanna have some fun.
The man who sat next to Xena put his arm around her. Gabrielle could tell from the look on Xena's face, that these men were about to be in trouble unless she did something.
GABRIELLE
You know it's been great talking to you. But we gotta get going.
She went to stand up to leave. The man beside her grabbed Gabrielle`s shoulder, pushing back down into her seat. She could see Xena getting madder and madder. Gabrielle sighed.
GABRIELLE
I tried. You guys are in for it now.
MAN 1
What are you talking about.
Xena grabbed the hand on her shoulder, squeezing it tight.
MAN 1
Gah. Let, go.
XENA
Oh don't be like that. I thought you wanted to have fun.
MAN 1
Okay, okay I'm sorry. We'll leave you alone.
Xena continued squeezing. Crushing his fingers. The man beside Gabrielle got up.
MAN 2
We get it. Let him go.
Xena just stared, refusing to release her grip. Squeezing tighter and tighter. The man cried out in pain as he felt his bones breaking.
MAN 1
GAH!
GABRIELLE
Okay Xena, I think they get the picture.
Xena didn't say anything, she just kept squeezing. Gabrielle saw a vacant look in Xena's eyes.
GABRIELLE
Xena.
Xena didn't respond.
GABRIELLE
Xena!
Gabrielle grabbed Xena's arm. Suddenly as if she had just woken up, Xena looked at Gabrielle in surprise.
MAN 1
Aaa!
Xena looked her her hand still locked tightly around the man's hand. She let go. The two men scurried away. Not wanting to risk any further pain.
GABRIELLE
Don't you think that was a little much.
Xena looked at her hand.
XENA
Yeah, I don't know what I was thinking.
GABRIELLE
Let's just get out of here.
They got up and left. They made their way back out of the city. As they left Xena was deep in her own thoughts.
XENA
(thinking to herself) I really don't know what I was thinking. The last thing I remember was him putting his arm around me. Then Gabrielle grabbing me. Why don't I remember crushing that man's hand?
Gabrielle could see that Xena was deep in thought.
GABRIELLE
What's on your mind Xena?
Xena told her what she was thinking.
GABRIELLE
You really don't remember doing that?
XENA
No.
GABRIELLE
Do you think it could've been caused by the same thing that made you pass out?
XENA
Most likely.
GABRIELLE
If that's true, then we need to figure out what stuff was. And find the cure.
Xena agreed. With that they set out to go back to where Xena fought the cultists. They figured that would be the best place to start looking for answers. But little did they know, that Xena's condition was about to get far, far worse.
×××
Xena and Gabrielle made their way back to the cave where Xena had fought the cultists. Hoping that they would find the antidote for whatever the cultist had used on Xena. Both of them searched for anything that might help. But the cave was empty, as if no one had been there to begin with.
GABRIELLE
There's nothing here. What do we do now?
XENA
I don't know. I have no clue what was in the vile that cultist threw at me.
GABRIELLE
You have all sorts of medical knowledge and remedies. I'm sure we'll figure out something.
XENA
Yea, besides more than likely the effects of whatever that was is only temporary. So I'm sure I'll be fine once it works it's way out of my system.
GABRIELLE
How do you feel now?
XENA
Fine.
Gabrielle gave Xena a look, not completely convinced due to the earlier events that had taken place. Xena placed her hands on Gabrielle's shoulders.
XENA
I'm okay Gabrielle. I really am.
Thiugh Gabrielle felt uneasy about the situation, she trusted Xena.
GABRIELLE
Okay. But just promise me if you don't feel right, you'll tell me.
XENA
I will.
GABRIELLE
I'm serious. You always put on a brave face. Even when I know Something's wrong. I don't want anything to happen to you Xena. So you have tell me if...
XENA
Alright. Alright, I promise.
Xena managed to ease Gabrielle's concerns. They left the cave and went on their way. Things continued on as usual, with nothing out of the ordinary happening to Xena. A few days later Xena and Gabrielle encountered some people in need of help.
MAN
Please, our sons been kidnapped and is being held for ransome.
WOMEN
We tried, but we can't get enough to pay.
They filled Xena and Gabrielle in on any important information that help aid in the safe return of their son.
XENA
Don't worry, we'll get your son back. Go home and wait there.
The man and woman left. Xena and Gabrielle left to retrieve the taken child and bring him back home safely. They reached the bandits hideout.
GABRIELLE
This place looks pretty well defended.
Xena inspected the exterior gate and fence.
XENA
Not well enough.
Xena grabbed some rope she spotted on the ground and made her way over to a large tree near the gate. Gabrielle watched as she climbed the tree and tied one end of the rope to the branch. Then holding the other end, Xena lept out of the tree, swinging over the fence and landed inside the camp. The kidnappers noticed as Xena dropped in.
KIDNAPPER 1
Oh crap it's Xena. I bet she's here to get the kid.
KIDNAPPER 2
Well don't just stand there. Get her!
A bunch of them changed Xena. She drew her sword, letting out her battle cry as began fighting the kidnappers. Meanwhile Gabrielle, following Xena's lead, made her way over the fence. She landed to see Xena taking down any of the kidnappers that had entered her sight. Gabrielle herself raced into the fight. When the numbers of the kidnappers had thined, Gabrielle turned her attention to freeing the child.
GABRIELLE
Xena I'm going to go find the boy.
Xena didn't respond, she just kept fighting. Figuring Xena heard her, Gabrielle took of to find the child. It took some searching, but Gabrielle finally found where they were holding him. He was obviously frightened. But once Gabrielle told him she was there to take him home, he went with her. Gabrielle brought the boy to a safe spot and told him to stay until she came back. Then she went to tell Xena that she had gotten the boy. When Gabrielle got back to Xena, she saw that Xena had taken out almost all of kidnappers.
GABRIELLE
Xena I got him!
Xena kept fighting.
GABRIELLE
(Thinking to herself) She must not have heard me
She yelled to Xena again. But Xena didn't respond as she continued taking down the kidnappers. Gabrielle watched as Xena finished off the rest of the enemies, as if she didn't notice anything else around her. When the battle was over, Xena just stood there. Sword in hand, as if waiting for more enemies to show up. Gabrielle walked over to her.
GABRIELLE
I think you got 'em all. Let's get the boy back to his parents.
Xena just stood there staring, as she tightened her grip on her sword.
GABRIELLE
Xena?
Gabrielle touched Xena's arm. Suddenly Xena swung her sword at Gabrielle. Luckily Gabrielle was able to dodge her attack.
GABRIELLE- Xena! What are you doing?!
Xena didn't say anything as she walked towards her. Gabrielle looked into Xena's eyes, seeing the same empty look as before.
GABRIELLE
Xena. Xena snap out of it.
Gabrielle's calls seemed to fall on deaf ears. As Xena kept after her. Continuing to attack. Gabrielle defended as she continued calling out to Xena.
GABRIELLE
This isn't you. Come on Xena wake up. Xena!!
Xena raised her sword to strike again, but then stopped. She shook her head, blinking as she lowered her weapon. She looked around, then at Gabrielle.
XENA
I blacked out again, didn't I?
GABRIELLE
You did. Are you okay?
XENA
I think so.
GABRIELLE
Do you know what happened?
XENA
No it's all blank. I remember getting here, thats it. Everything's in a fog. Then I heard you calling me and I came back to my senses.
Xena saw Gabrielle still had her weapons ready.
XENA
Gabrielle did I attack you?
Gabrielle lowered her sais.
GABRIELLE
It's okay Xena, you weren't yourself.
Xena felt a combination of sadness and shame fall over her. How could she attack Gabrielle, the one she loved more than anything else in the world.
XENA
I'm sorry, I...
Xena didn't know what to say. Gabrielle hugged Xena.
GABRIELLE
Don't worry we'll find a way to fix this.
She pulled back.
GABRIELLE
Come on, we still have to bring the boy back home.
Gabrielle got to boy and all three of them went back to the boys parents. They dropped the boy off and left. That night Xena and Gabrielle sat by the campfire. As Xena sat in silence, Gabrielle could see the pain in her eyes. She moved closer to Xena, taking her hand in hers. Xena stared into the fire.
XENA
I feel like I'm losing myself.
GABRIELLE
It'll be okay. We'll find a cure and you'll be fine.
Gabrielle leaned her head on Xena's shoulder.
GABRIELLE
I'll make sure of it.
Xena reached up and gently placed her hand on Gabrielle's face.
GABRIELLE
I love you Xena. I'm not going to let anything happen to you.
Gabrielle lightly kissed Xena's hand as she turned her face to Xena's. Xena gave her a soft smile, before kissing her.
XENA
You know I love you more than anything. You bring so much good info my life.
GABRIELLE
Xena...
Gabrielle smiled as Xena leaned and kissed her again. Gabrielle lightly traced her fingertips down Xena's arms. Until Xena took Gabrielle's hands in hers, giving them soft kiss. Then Xena pulled her onto her lap. Kissing Gabrielle with even more passion. As the fire between them began burning hotter, they removed the barriers of clothing that prevented them from exploring one another completely. With Gabrielle still on her lap, Xena slowly traced her fingertips down Gabrielle's body. Gabrielle felt her heart begin to beat faster with anticipation as Xena's hand got closer to it's destination. Finally as Gabrielle felt Xena enter her, she let out a soft moan. Xens smiled as she kissed Gabrielle again. Gabrielle wrapped her arms around Xena's neck as she began moving while Xena held her close. It wasn't long before Gabrielle felt herself edging closer to her peak. Xena could tell and began to move along with Gabrielle. Moments later Gabrielle felt herself being overtaken by an immense
wave of pleasure. Xena held her close as she came down from her high. Afterwards they got dressed and sat by the fire. Gabrielle was wrapped in Xena's embrace. Xena sat deep in thought. Gabrielle turned to Xena, seeing the seriousness on her face.
GABRIELLE
Xena? You okay?
XENA
Gabrielle, I have to ask you to do something.
GABRIELLE
Ok.
XENA
Listen, it's very important.
GABRIELLE
Xena, what is it?
XENA
If I completely lose control I need you to stop me.
GABRIELLE
Of course I will. I stopped you before didn't I?
XENA
No I mean you have to make sure I can't harm any innocent people ever again.
Gabrielle got a really bad feeling. She turned to Xena.
GABRIELLE
Xena what exactly are you asking me to do?
XENA
If I can no longer be reasoned with and all sense of myself is gone. Then Gabrielle, I need you to kill me.
×××
Gabrielle looked at Xena in shock.
GABRIELLE
How could you ask me to do that?! Ask me to kill you. I love you Xena. I could never.
XENA
Calm down Gabrielle. That's only as a very last option. And if everything I am is completely gone. Which means I would no longer be the person you know.
GABRIELLE
I don't care, I'm not killing you. Even if you become someone that I don't recognize. I'll find a way to fix you.
Xena gave Gabrielle a sad look.
XENA
Gabrielle you know I would never ask you to do anything you couldn't handle.
Gabrielle felt a wave of sadness fall over her.
GABRIELLE
I can't do that Xena. I just can't.
XENA
I Know right now it seems impossible. But if it comes down to it, you have to think of the greater good.
GABRIELLE
But Xena...
Although Gabrielle knew that Xena would never want to become some sort of mindless, violent, killer. She just couldn't imagine herself taking Xena's life.
GABRIELLE
I just don't think I can.
Xena knew that what was asking of Gabrielle was something that would break Gabrielle's heart. Obviously she didn't want to burden Gabrielle with such a task. But Xena also knew that she was strong enough to get through it.
XENA
Please Gabrielle. Don't let me live out the rest my life as a cold blooded murderer, without any sense morality or self. You can't let innocent people get hurt. I've already done far too many terrible things in my past. Don't allow me to become something far worse than what I once was.
Gabrielle could see a look of almost desperation on Xena's face. Finally, reluctantly she agreed to Xena's heartbreaking request.
GABRIELLE
Okay. I'll do it.
Xena heard the sadness in her voice. She pulled Gabrielle in and held her close. Gabrielle's eyes began to overflow with tears.
GABRIELLE
I'm not gonna let you lose yourself Xena. And I wont lose you either. I'll make sure that you don't have to die. We'll find a way to stop whatever this is.
Xena gently brushed Gabrielle's hair, kissing the top of her head in an effort to comfort her.
XENA
(soft whisper) Okay, okay
After some time they feel asleep and morning came. Gabrielle awoke to see Xena sitting off by herself. She got up and sat beside Xena.
GABRIELLE
Xena? You okay?
Xena didn't look at her, she just gazed into the distance.
XENA
Right now, yea.
Gabrielle smiled at Xena.
GABRIELLE
Good. We can get going than. We gotta start looking for that cure.
Xena turned her attention to Gabrielle.
XENA
You're awfully optimistic this morning.
Gabrielle stood up.
GABRIELLE
I told you already Xena. I'm not losing you. Now let's get moving.
XENA
And where exactly are we going?
Gabrielle's optimism seemed to drain away with that question.
GABRIELLE
I don't know. Xena what are we going to do?
XENA
I'm not sure.
GABRIELLE
But you always have a plan.
XENA
Not this time. I have no idea what potion was made of. Or where those cultists went. We have next to nothing to go on.
By the way she was talking, it sounded to Gabrielle like Xena had already given up hope. She sat back down next to Xena.
GABRIELLE
I thought we agreed that were going to save you. You're not actually giving up are you?
XENA
Of course not. I'm just trying to make sure you fully understand the situation.
GABRIELLE
I know, I do.
XENA
Okay.
GABRIELLE
So what ARE we going to do? You said "next" to nothing.
Xena gave a little smile.
XENA
Ah you caught that. Should've figured you would.
GABRIELLE
Well?
XENA
Back in my days as a warlord. My army came across a far off village The people there specialized in poison and medicines. I didn't think they had anything of real value, so we didn't raid them. I just allowed them to treat some of my injured men. Then we left.
GABRIELLE-
You never mentioned that before.
XENA
Honestly I had completely forgotten about them until now.
GABRIELLE
Do you remember where to find them?
XENA
I think so. But it was a really long time ago. So who knows if they still practice medicine. Or if that village and it's people are even still there.
GABRIELLE
It's worth a try. So I say we go find them.
XENA-
lright then we should get going. It's going to be a very long journey to get there.
GABRIELLE
Right.
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