YENTLEPRISE-FAKE UPDATE 3

FAKE UPDATE DISCLAIMER: This is a fake update.
All heads roll to Sydney, Australia
Breadsticks provided courtesy of the Pleasure Chest in Santa Monica, CA.


First Officer Kerry gazed over at Captain Dar, as a wry smile stole across her face. She hadn't been assigned to the YENTLEPRISE long, but it was proving to be her favourite assignment to date. The Federation was at war and times were grim, but this overwhelming love that had developed between her and the captain filled her with an irrational sense of well-being. She'd heard conflicting things about Paladar Roberts. She was acknowledged by even the most envious to be the best captain in the fleet, outsmarting every opponent and the strategies being taught at the Academy were constantly being updated to keep up with her. She'd been taught the Paladar Transwarp Backflip Manoeuvre in her first Space Tactics class. Other reports were that she was a scoundrel and a rogue. She'd learned a few new manoeuvres from her lately on the couch on her quarters, and that's what she was smiling about.

The Captain glanced over at her and winked and then turned back to the problem at hand. She'd received a top secret message from Admiral Les T. Alastar just hours before. Their mission was to attend something called the Space Con and search for the E-Missy-sary. The Admiral was bellyaching about something he called an update that was necessary for millions back on a zone known only as "the List." The course was set and they were both going off duty in a few minutes. They were going to meet on the holodeck for a real water shower, with SOAP instead of the usual sonic showers.

Dax and her lover Wolf, the Clingwrap security officer stepped onto the bridge. Dar stood and nodded wryly at her, "We're going to some spacey Con and seeking something called an update. Frankly, I'm not sure this E-Missy- sary exists, but keep lurking for her."

Dar, now out of uniform, stepped into the sunken tub. Just like Kerry to rewrite the holodeck program and surprise her, she thought. Kerry hungrily watched her descent in the water as the heat rose up her skin. Dar smiled at her lover's combination of shyness and lust that she found very touching, "I'm going to get you in a lather, First Officer." "Make it so, Captain," Kerry answered. As their lips were about to meet the shrill alarm sounded, "Battle stations, Battle stations we have Borg approaching fast." Dax's voice rang through the ship that remembered. "Damn," said Captain Dar as she leaped from the couch and ran to the bridge. Kerry wrapped herself in a towel and grabbing one for Dar, Kerry chased after the tall, dark-haired woman. The Captain, in all her glory, burst onto the bridge and viewed the cube flying towards them. "What the hell is that?" she yelled, not noticing the open-mouthed stares of her mute crewmates. On screen was a redesigned Borg ship. It had the usual cube base, but had two circular protrusions sticking out on each side, almost as if the ship was wearing a hat with big mouse ears. Kerry scampered onto the bridge and handed Dar a towel, much to the disappointment of the crew and especially to Nanotech Doc Jules, who couldn't help herself from beginning Dar's quarterly physical exam. "Here," Kerry said, "I think the crew will pay better attention to duty if you put this on." A wry grin from the Captain and the sound of choked laughter from Dax as the rest of the crew turned bright pink.

"Incoming message from the Borg ship, Captain," and Dar turned her towel- draped body toward a screen filled with the loathsome face of Borg Queen Michelle Graver and her wannabe Borg drone Steve. "So Captain Dar, we meet again." said the Queen. "Ah, Michelle, I see by the company you're keeping that you're still relying on breadsticks for entertainment." Michelle's eyes bugged out and Steve turned beet red with rage. Heads were going to roll.
Kerry propped open a blue-green eye and regarded her lover's profile. Wow, that was a strange dream, she thought. Dar opened her eyes and lay her hand on Kerry's cheek, "Hi," she said sleepily. They'd had a late night that had ended in exploring the many uses of a very messy double-dipped Dairy Queen ice cream cone which had left them sticky but sated. "Ewwww, sticky. I think we need a shower," Kerry grinned at her lover. An eyebrow went up and an interested look from Dar, "Hmmm, yeah.....you, me, water and lather--let's go."