Authors Note: Hey guys! Another update for you. Sorry it's been so long, it's been a messy week. I've had so much feedback from the last chapter, and I appreciate all of it. A lot of comments about how everyone hate's Xena being with someone else, too. I just want to remind you guys, this story is calling Turning Tables for a reason. I Will Be, was a story about Xena being unfaithful and the consequences. This is a story about the tables turning, and the consequences of Gabrielle not staying with Xena. And remember, when do I ever make my stories easy on you guys? This chapter will show you more of what I mean. I really do love all the comments though, and I hope they continue you. Again, if you want to send me an email, it is jacklavigne13@hotmail .com
Enjoy!
Disclaimer: See Part 1
Chapter Nine
Her heart was breaking, shattering in her chest with every step she took. She felt hollow, like a part of her soul was missing. It is missing, Gabrielle thought to herself miserably. It's back in that hut with Xena, with Xena and Alexandria. That had not been what she had expected to see when she crept into her ex lover's hut. What she had expected was a night like the one the two women shared over two years ago, but with a different ending. This time, she wouldn't walk away. This time, her and Xena would be together and stay together. They would be a family again and Xena would love her and only her. It had not gone the way she had planned.
It is what you should have expected though. Xena is with Alexandria now, so Alexandria should be in Xena's hut. Touching her body and kissing her lips. In her bed. In her arms.
Where I should be, damn it.
Why did she walk away? Why didn't she just stay and talk to Xena? They could have worked things out and it would be her in Xena's arms. She knew why she had left, because the warrior had cheated on her, but she didn't even care about that anymore. How had she let two years pass without even talking to her soulmate? All she needed to do was take one short trip or write one letter. Instead, she stayed away, unable to face the woman that held the other half of her soul. Why? Because of Xena being unfaithful? No. Because she was a coward. Because she was too scared to get hurt again.
How pathetic is it that now, I would bear the most excruciating pain, just to be in her arms again. I would die a million times for just one more chance. Why didn't I just stay? Gods, why?
Gabrielle felt lost. Ever since she had kissed the warrior in her hut, she'd been planning to return as quickly as possibly for more of the dark haired woman. She hated herself for it, knowing that despite Alexandria's words, the woman would be hurt by Xena's betrayl. But Gabrielle wanted Xena so desperately, more than she had been willing to admit. It wasn't under the circumstances she had hoped for, but she found herself unable to stop, despite the fact that Xena had a partner. She needed the warrior. She loved her.
"Stop it," Gabrielle whispered to herself in disgust. She couldn't believe the things that she was thinking of. She had left Xena for being unfaithful and here she was now, wanting the woman to be unfaithful to her new partner, for her. And even worse, Gabrielle was being unfaithful to the naked woman she had left in her bed.
By the Gods, what am I doing?
She shook her head as she reached the door of her hut before entering quietly. She gazed at the woman bathed in moonlight sleeping peacefully in her bed. She couldn't deny the woman's remarkable likeness to her ex lover. The dark hair, the high cheek bones, the ocean blue eyes, though, not as blue eyes Xena's.
Who are you kidding. She could never compare to Xena.
No matter how beautiful the woman was or how kind and devoted, she would never be Xena. She would never make the bard's heart race with excitement or make her skin flush with overwhelming desire. This woman wasn't her soulmate, she was a replacement. Gabrielle sighed as she removed her clothes before joining her lover in bed. She had never truly doubted her relationship with this woman until Xena had returned yesterday. She thought that maybe she was falling in love with her, but she had been proved wrong. She had just wanted to fall in love with her, if only to forget the woman who truly owned her heart.
"Gabrielle?" The bard heard the sleepy mumble from her lover and cringed. "Where did you go?"
"Just for a walk," Gabrielle replied softly, feeling tears well up in her eyes as the woman cuddled up against her back. She felt sick to her stomach as her lover wrapped an arm around her waist, pulling her close. She didn't want this, not from her.
"Oh, okay. Love you," The dark haired woman said before her breathing deepened once more as she fell back to sleep.
"I know," the bard whispered, closing her eyes as she let the tears fall.
#